Hey guys, sorry for not updating. I wasn't sure I was going to finish the story at all in fairness because I don't have a clue what to write anymore but I'm going to try and in the spirit of trying here is the next chapter. Hope its not too rubbish (: Thanks!

"You're back?"

The hope in Kurt's voice is almost painful to listen to and Puck finds himself thinking of finding him falling apart in the middle of Rachel's room that morning. All alone and looking lost for the minute it took Blaine to wrap his arms around his boyfriend. The need to protect Kurt from that kind of pain again overwhelms him and he begins to channel the old Puck, determined to not let her see how much he's affected him despite the fact that Kurt's gone from smiling to frowning and back again several times in the space of 2 minutes, tears welling the entire time. Puck'll just have to be strong for both of them.

"What're you doing here Rachel?"

Anger laces his voice and they all hear it loud and clear. She pulls her gaze away from Kurt and stares at him defiantly, so unlike the girl that had hung on Finn's every word that it actually shocks him and for a second he's proud of her. Just a second though because then he's back to thinking of the lifeless look in Kurt eyes that day and the McKinley jersey that he still hides in the back of his wardrobe.

"I told you. I'm here to explain so you can either invite me in or I'll just tell you here"

Kurt invites her in just as Puck tells her to stay and there's an awkward moment where Kurt gives Puck a death glare and eventually moves back to let Rachel in, against Pucks wishes of course.

The fact that she's just been let into her own home isn't lost on any of them and for a moment that terrified, out of place look he recognizes from the Finchel saga returns as she takes in the changes to the apartment.

There are photos of Kurt's graduation and Puck is his police uniform, his leather jacket is slung over the couch next to Kurt's neatly folded jacket, fashion magazines are littered around the room along with beer bottles and even an empty pizza box from last night. Kurt's left some of his designs on the table and, despite the constant insistence from Puck that this is a guy's apartment; there are even scraps of material and a sowing kit lying around. Some of Blaine's stuff has already been moved over and there are several of his boxes lining the hallway with his name scribbled across them and a crude drawings that Puck was very proud of.

Still pissed at Kurt for letting her in, Puck landed himself heavily in the armchair in the corner of the room, stopping to pick up the can of beer on his way and waited for what was likely to be an epic excuse as to why she'd chosen to break 3 hearts in one night.

"So come on then Rach, what was so important that you had to disappear of the face of the earth for? 'Coz we know you ain't been slumming it in Lima with Hudson" he snaps at her, irritated by the calm way she folds her hands on her lap as she sits next to Kurt on the couch. Kurt's still looking at her like his dreams have all come true, and he thinks they probably have, he considers calling Blaine over to sort Kurt out and sends a quick text to let him know what's going on.

She took a deep breath and tugged on one of her curls nervously, her eye downcast and her two front teeth chewing on her bottom lip and for the first time he thinks about how painful this must be for her because, behind all of his anger, he knows there must have been a good reason, he could see what Finn was doing to her.

"He was cheating" she sighed "You knew it and I knew it, hell I think everyone knew really and they all…they all looked like her"

Neither he nor Kurt pretended to not know who she was talking about, they'd noticed long before she had that all of Finn's other women had been tall with blonde hair, blue eyes and a tiny waist, they'd all looked like Quinn.

"I could deal with the cheating, he promised he'd stop and I believed him, foolishly. I trusted him and I guess that was my mistake. I thought that if I could be better, be less me, then he'd realised he didn't need all those other girls. And yeah…I know that you all tried to warn me but I was just so…so in love with him that I didn't see what you guys were talking about. Even when he suggested moving back to Lima I didn't see it, I was willing to give up my dreams and my life here in New York because he made me believe that the cheating would stop, that somehow we'd be better in Lima than we were here in New York. He said…" her voice falters and she looks up, wide eyed and worried, straight up at him.

"What'd he say Rach?" In his gut Puck knows what's about to come out of her mouth and he knows he isn't going to like it.

"He said that being away from you would fix things, our friendship was destroying the relationship, that it was my fault he was cheating. I know how stupid that sounds know but back then I was so used to hearing that it was my fault that I just believed him, especially when he said that you wouldn't…care…if I left, it'd mean nothing, you had Kurt and Blaine and New York. So I considered leaving, I thought about it hard but what I didn't consider was why he wanted to go back to Lima. That was until…until you mentioned…until you mentioned that you were sending the latest picture of Beth, from Shelby, back to Lima…so Quinn could see it because that's where she was. I hadn't known that she was still there until then and it all made sense. The cheating wouldn't stop and I was done, I was tired of not being good enough for Finn so I said no…I said no"

Kurt moves him hand to grasp hers and Puck can see why because at this point in her story she looks scared of continuing and he knows for certain there's more to come. She opens and closes her mouth a few times, her knuckles turning white on the grip she has on Kurt's hand and her eyes bouncing from him to the door. As much as he doesn't want to admit it, it crosses his mind that she's scared of him and try as he might to reassure himself that she wouldn't think that of him he can't get the idea out of his head as she struggles to continue talking.

"I said no and…and he hit me."

"HE DID WHAT!?" Puck explodes as he tries to control the flash of red he sees, he now understands that she wasn't scared of him but rather what he would say. He can see the shock and the anger in Kurt's face too and he knows that they're both imagining snapping Finn's neck as Rachel hurries to explain.

"It was just the once and it wasn't anything big" she rushes, her eyes darting between the two guys "It didn't even leave a mark. His anger got the best of him and he lashed out but that was the final straw for me. I came home, said goodbye to you guys without actually saying goodbye and packed. I regret leaving the way I did, I should have told you guys, but I don't regret leaving. I'd lost so much of myself in that relationship that I didn't know who I was. I couldn't breathe here and I couldn't forget that Finn was only a few minutes away at best; I was scared so I ran."

"He..he" Kurt's stuttering now and that's usually a warning for the tears that are close behind, Rachel seems to know this though as she turns to face him, her hand still grasping at his like it's a lifeline.

"That's not the point Kurt! The point is that I left and I'm sorry, God…I'm so sorry that I left you like that, that I left you all like that."

"He…" Kurt seems to need to say the words out loud, to hear them from someone else's voice other than Rachel's which has been shaking for the last few minutes.

"He hit you" Puck says, his voice steady and his eyes staring at them both on the sofa. "Finn hurt you. You didn't tell us. Then you left."

His mind turns the whole thing over and he resist the urge to laugh, just laugh at everything because how could he have not known. When he'd moved to the city he'd been half in love with her already. They'd spent countless days together trying to figure out his future and practicing for whatever audition she had coming up, they'd gone running together and shopping too, they'd spent hours lounging around the apartment and playing music. His eyes had never seemed to stray far from her, no matter how many women he took home with him, his eyes never left her. So how had he now known?

"Where have you been?" The questions seems to explode from Kurt's mouth, like he's somehow lost control of the words spilling from between his lips. "We've looked everywhere. I'm sure your Dad's hate us now and we rang every Gleek! Puck even used up his favours at the station looking for you! We traced your phone for Christ's sake!"

All the anger that he'd been waiting to come from Kurt comes spilling out and he has to admit that he's never seen the dude this angry at Rachel. He expects her to look ashamed of herself and repeat how sorry she was before asking her questions but what he gets instead blows his mind.

"You became a police officer?" she questions, her voice quiet and her eyes wide, a small smile, the first real smile he's seen on her, tugging at the corners of her mouth. She sounds proud, almost like his Ma did when he told her. "You did it"

That moment sticks with him and all the anger that had built up within him over the last 18 months melts because she's finally proud of him.

"I was in LA with Santana, I didn't tell my Dad's exactly where I was going and I told none of the Gleek's and neither did she. I did a few plays up there, taught a few classes while San did her lawyer thing. She's here in the city with me, she's moving her firm to New York and so I have the option of staying here or going back to LA but either way, it felt like the right time to come back." That defiance that she portrayed earlier comes back to her now and her eyes shine as she continues "I know how angry you guys must be at me, I get that, I do but I'm staying. I want the career I've always dreamed of, LA was great but New York's my home and I'm not giving that up again. I want you guys back too though; I'd love my family back even if it takes you years to forgive me, even if it takes a lifetime. I'm staying"

The words are barely out of her mouth before Kurt throws his arms around her neck, hugging her tight. Rachel looks shocked, like she hadn't expected him to forgive her so quickly, but Puck doesn't think he's ever seen her smile so bright. That smile that didn't reach her eyes earlier is gone and just like that she's the old Rachel again.