Chapter 4: In Which Gilbert Is Completely Lost

"I'm Awesome, No You're not don't lie! N- no I am! No way man look at you, drunk every night since that stupid party! Am not! Are too, you're even talking to your refection!"

It was true, Gilbert was in his bathroom, just after throwing up, having a conversation with himself and the mirror above the sink.

"Aww crap." Gilbert passed out on the floor, mug in hand.

In Gilbert's dream!

A little yellow bird flew over onto Gilbert's head. "Oh Gilberd it's you! You're so awesome!" "Le coo coo, le coo coo." "What the?" Slowly the bird's face turned into Francis' and it continued to laugh at him, "le coo coo, le coo coo!" "No! No! Make it stop!" But it didn't stop, not even close. While Gilbert tried to run from the creepy bird thing he tripped and fell into a wheelchair. His legs became as heavy as lead! "Le coo coo, le coo coo!" "No! Leave me alone! Stop!" A beer mug started dancing, "Bottoms up Gilly!" "NO MORE!"

He stood up, hitting his head on the sink in the process.

"That dream was so not awesome! At least I know how Matthew really feels about that yank off Francis!" Wait what? NO really, what conclusion is that? "Yes of course! Francis must be holding that sweet ass captive! No wonder he broke his legs! He knew I was a threat and had to keep Matthew from getting away somehow! Woah that's creepy! CREEPIER THAN ME! HUZZAH!"

"GILBERT SHUT UP! I'M TRYING TO SLEEP!" yelled his brother Ludwig.

Gilbert was about to say something back when he heard a litte Italian voice, "Neh Luddy, whats going on?"

What's Feliciano doing in Ludwig's room? NO WAY! Is my little bro getting some ass before me! I can't let this happen! To the walls!

Gilbert opened the mini fridge in his bedroom and climbed inside to find a tunnel leading to his little brother's room. He peaked through the eyes of a… united nations poster, that traitor, and saw none other than Feliciano under the sheets with Ludwig! What The Hell!

"Feliciano how did you even get in here! Get out!"

Oh never mind, you're all good Gilbert. Ludwig kicked Feli out of the bed. When the little Italian started to leave he noticed that Alfred's eyes were moving on the poster.

"Ve~"

"Oh Shit," said Gilbert.

Feliciano poked Poster Alfred's eyes and Gilbert screamed again in pain.

"Ah! It looks like lead singer of United Nations, Alfred Jones, but it screams like Gilbert being poked in the eyes! Ludwig Quick! Your house is haunted!"

"W- wait what? Haunted? … GILBERT ARE YOU IN THE WALLS AGAIN! I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO STOP THAT! IT MESSES WITH THE PLUMING!"

Gilbert ran for his life, he knew his Arian little brother wouldn't hesitate to kick his ass now that he knew he was in the walls again. That and Ludwig was about to get some! Wait I thought we went over the fact that he wasn't? Gilbert get yo mind out of the gutter!

XXX

So the next day Gilbert met up with his best friend, Wikipedia. "United Nations, let's see if there's anything new?" He typed in the name and found a few new items about Alfred F. Jones. Not his main focus but, whatever. "Hamburger obsessed? That's so not awesome, if I ate as many as he did I would blow up like a blimp? How does he stay so sexy thin, even though he eats like a pig?" There was a link, diet secrets maybe? Gilbert clicked it, at the same time getting a bad feeling about this. Sexy as hell, Alfred posing, even though it was obviously not his actual shirtless body… "Damn you photoshop! Don't make me look at- … is there one for Matthew? No wait! I'm not Francis, I'm no pervert!"

Gilbert's hand moved against his will, clicking back and forth, all around, looking for pictures of the Canadian with a sweet ass.

"No lefty! Don't let the devils win! You're better than that! Stop clicking! Oh God Francis! Keep clicking keep clicking! Holy shit Matthew! No I mustn't look, but I must… But I mustn't! I- I- … I'm goin to hell."

XXX

So it was the last tour of the United Nations World Tour that would only be traveling America. Don't know how we got here but here it is, a little bit before the concert. Gilbert had somehow managed to get himself to rap, and sing a little, for the concert. This was of no real importance to him, he just needed to speak with Matthew so they could devise a plan to free him! Although then he wouldn't have the title "Wheelchair Ninja", which Gilbert only knew about thanks to Wikipedia. Thank God For Wikipedia!

Gilbert tried to talk with Matthew and Alfred (since Alfred was standing next to Matthew) once they finished a few touch ups during rehearsal. They were currently backstage and the thing that was irritating the silver haired teen the most was how Alfred kept talking over him, trying to keep Matthew's attention and sending him warning looks. Why did everyone in The United Nations hate him? Frenchie wasn't very nice—went crazy on his ass when he tried to touch Matthew and now Burger Boy was staring at him strangely. This totally sucks! So what, who cares that he potentially broke up the band for the selfish reason of touching Matthew's ass! I mean have you seen that thing! You'd go crazy stalker fan boy to if you did! I mean… DAYMN! Woah got lost there for a minute, so back to the story!

Gilbert had been trying to talk with his sweet Gilbird, but Alfred kept getting in the way! Stupid tall American, eating whatever he wants yet staying super sexy thin!

"Cool, hey I gotta go double check on some things first," Alfred announced, nodding his head before turning back to Gilbert to give him another warning look. "Don't try anything dude," he then growled and left. No way! This was Gilly's chance! He was finally alone… With Matthew! Woah man keep your cool, remember why you're here! Don't freak out, stay focused!

He watched the American turn a corner before tugging at Matthew's shirt cutely, standing up as he did so. "Can I talk with you?" his voice was slightly irritated as he said that and Matthew went as far as looking intimidated. The Canadian nodded shyly and wheeled himself alongside Gilbert out the double doors that led into a hallway. Seriously though, Matthew just keeps asking for it!

"Please don't tell me you're seriously still with that Frenchie guy?"

"Wha—? Of course I am why?" Matthew asked, a bit thrown off by the sudden question. One could even call it an accusation… because it kinda was… yo.

"Because he totally got your leg broken! Don't you hate being in that wheelchair (ninja)? You've been in it forever—are you even sure you fully forgive Frenchie dude?"

"What do you mean Gilbert? We were all confused back then. Arthur and Alfred were pretty screwed up and Alfred sent Arthur to talk with Francis and they messed things up a bit too—it's all of our faults, not just Francis's."

"But—but still! How can you forgive him?" Gilbert was being desperate now.

Seeing how upset the other had become, Matthew smiled lightly to himself as he thought over his next words. They would really hurt Gilbert, but if it would straighten him out at least in the slightest, then he'd give it a shot. "Because I love him. I mean—yeah he flirts and all of that, but I've learnt not to take that to heart, it's who he is," he answered, blushing a bit at what he said despite himself.

Holy crap! Not only is he super cute, BUT HE HAS A HEART OF GOLD! Gilbert, I'm not sure even your awesome powers can waver his loyalty! Holy Maple Syrup On A Hocky Stick! Just like- HOLY- You are powerless against his wholesomeness!

"And again, it wasn't just Francis that got my leg broken, it was all of us—The United Nations together. We were pretty screwed up and I get it. Al hadn't seen Arthur in such a long time and vice versa, Francis and I were on complicated terms—I guess you could say Kiku was the mediator. But look at us now, we're all together after all of that and I forgive everyone, Arthur for letting Francis kiss him and Alfred for starting it in the first place even though it was unintentional. We do seem like we've got everything figured out now, but remember Ludwig's party? Alfred and Arthur hadn't set any boundaries ahead of time and Francis and I were just figuring things out. I've dedicated myself to Francis okay?"

Did he really have to bring up the party? I mean this totally sucks because Gilbert finally forgot after his twelfth night of passing out drunk in his bathroom? Be strong Gilly!

"I could still treat you better…"

"Not that I'm blaming you or anything, you helped us get messed up in the first place," Matthew pointed out, guilt seeping into his heart when he saw the brief flash of hurt flash in the rappers eyes. "But I'd like to thank you."

Gilbert looked up in astonishment, obviously having not expected for the drummer to thank him. As he looked up, Matthew had tugged him down and kissed him on the lips very, very briefly.

… Did that just happen? Shit, I should have closed my eyes! Damn it!

"Don't worry," Matthew started. "You'll eventually find someone other than me," and the Canadian turned the wheelchair to wheel himself back backstage. "Oh, and you have six minutes before show time."

Gilbert slid onto the ground and ran a hand through his hair with a heavy sigh. Okay, he got it. He was never going to get Matthew. Note taken—but that still didn't mean that it hurt his heart like hell. After a long, slow minute or silence, Gilbert hesitantly pulled out his cellular and dialed a number.

"Should I really do this? Isn't this like giving up… on everything?"

After a bit of ringing, he was brought to voice mail. "Hey Roderich. Just wanna say hi and all…could you meet me somewhere? I dunno—anywhere, you choose, I'm not up to it…"

He closed the phone and went out on stage, his heart still heavy, his mind too full, and a meeting with Roderich, the man he thought he was through with, at the end of this show. He then got a feeling just like Alfred's, it was dread, he really didn't want the concert to end.

(TonoTime!)

Yay! Hahahaha! Woah I did a lot of swearing in this chapter, I feel so dirty? Not as dirty as Prussia! Oh god it kills me typing the human names, lol did anyone else catch my slip up on chapter 2? I keep meaning to change it… but I keep forgetting. Me and Gilly was gone go out drinkin you fo like third time dis week! Lol jk, review my sweet hearts!