"I was.. kidding?" Even in my exhaustion-induced monotone, I was unconvincing. Carlos grabbed my shoulders.

"You must explain! Like, now!" he screamed. A loud laugh came form my room. I sighed.

"It's a long, boring story." I said, kind of drifting off in space.

"OH MY GOD, TELL!" he said, shaking me.

"Dude, if you stop I'll start! I'm like blacking out!" he stopped. I took a deep breath and started speaking.

"She was like, literately, my everything. Well, that's not saying much since I basically had nothing if not negative amounts of love and care. Anyway, she had this red bob cut, and a side bang, her cheeks were like, babies' cheeks, they were adorable. Her eyes were big and blue, just everything about her was innocence and beauty. I don't even know how we met, we just did. She just like, fell from the sky. Anyway, anyway, you know, we dated for like 2 years, it was a... physical... relationship from the beginning-" I was cut off.

"Oh mi DIOS, yo no puedo creer que nos mintio de esta manera!" he screamed at me. I stared at him blankly.

"Ooops, sorry, OH MY GOD, I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU LIED TO US LIKE THAT!" he screamed again. I threw up my hands.

"I'm SORRY, I have my REASONS!" before he could ask, I started talking again.

"ANYWAY, yeah, we're were like heads over heels in love. It was literately the best and worst 2 years of my life, but then again, my life did suck. Anyway, when we were fifteen-" I was cut off again.

"Wait, you were with this girl for like 2 years and we didn't KNOW?"

"Uh, yeah, basically. You guys are clueless." Really, REALLY clueless. "ANYWAY, when we were fifteen, uhm, stuff happened that was pretty crazy and sad and yeah that's the end of the story." I said. The lump in my throat felt like a bowling ball.

"You're not serious right now." Carlos said blankly. I sighed shakily and continued even though my eyes had already started watering and I could tell my voice would crack.

"Ok, fine, when we were fifteen, she announced there would be a little Logan around, so it was like OH MY GOD at first but then we got used to the idea and eventually we just got over it and got all excited for the baby. But, uhm... she... got shot in a drive-by. And that was the end of that." I said, sadly chuckling. Carlos' hand loudly clapped to his mouth and his eyes were wider than before.

"Mierda." he finally said. I sighed and spontaneously burst into tears.

"I-I-I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU JUST SAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIID!" I cried loudly. Kendall and Jo both came bursting out of the room, both surprisingly still clothed.

"What did you do?" Kendall yelled at Carlos. Carlos started yelling at Kendall and Jo started yelling over Carlos at me. It was unbearable.

"! OH MY GOD!" I screamed, pushed past Jo and Kendall, burst into my room and flopped on my bed. I curled up and continued crying.

Later, staring at the blackness of the ceiling while feeling Kendall's eyes on me, I realized, I venting about her just helped me let go.

Now to deal with the 800 billion other problems of my life.