Again, sorry if the Janitor is, like, waaaay OOC. Other than that, please enjoy!

My Lapse In Judgment
My Hypothesis

"Janitor!" I squeak, horrified as I stared at the giant in front of me, "W-what are you doing here?!"

The Janitor frowns at me, "This is a supply closet. I'm getting cleaning supplies."

I give him a 'you're-not-fooling-me' look and he shrugs, "Okay, so I was getting a can of honey."

Honey? I look behind me and see, lo and behold, a huge collection of tins of honey. I look back to see the Janitor grinning maliciously at me.

"We all know how much Scooter likes putting sticky stuff in his hair…" he chuckles darkly.

Oh. So it's for some terribly cruel trick against JD. Today, I can't even bring myself to care – life continues for everyone outside the store closet but for me, it's stalled for just a few minutes.

"So, what's wrong?" he asks, closing the door and dropping down beside me. It's pitch black, so I can't see his face, but I assume he isn't serious.

"You really want to know?" I sniff.

"Of course! I like helping people."

Hah!

"You know, I was almost a therapist."

Hah!

"I was gonna go to college and everything, but I was thrown out. I won't go into detail, but that little Irish lady will never grow her hair back…"

…I don't even want to know.

"It's just…" I swallow and shake my head, "It's stupid."

"Hey!" he cries, and I feel his hand on my shoulder, "If it makes you cry, it's not stupid. It deserves pummeling."

Despite myself, I laugh. How could JD ever hate this man?

"Can we at least turn the lights on?" I ask him.

"Well…how do I test my ability to see in the dark?"

Classic Janitor! …at least, I hope he's kidding.

"At home, in a dark room?" I suggest, smiling. I hear him make a 'Hmm…' noise.

"Touché, Blonde Doctor. Better at home than here, where I'm getting nagged all the time. 'Clean that bathroom! Mop that floor! Don't steal that corpse's pants'!"

As he speaks, he stands and switches on the light bulb, so I have time to disguise my confused expression. I stand up and dust off my skirt, and then pause.

"Janitor?"

He turns to me, "Yup?"

I blink, and stammer, "I-if Lady came to you, and told you she was p…p-pregnant, what would you do?"

The Janitor frowned, "Pregnant? Why, what has she told you? What do you know?!?!"

"Nothing!" I shriek, "God! She's not pregnant!"

He visibly relaxes and breathes a sigh of relief.

Then, I shrug and point out, "Well, she hasn't said she is, but she could well –"

"Waaarugh!"

"Stop that! Frickedy-frick, it was hypothetical!"

"Well then, why are you asking?!"

I stop up short and twist my shirt hem in my hands, suddenly shy. He peers at me, and I can practically see realization dawn on him.

For a janitor, he is incredibly clever.

"Are you pregnant?" he asks. I open and close my mouth several times, like a fish, unsure of what to say. Deny it? Be honest?

"Well…t-that's one way of p-putting it…"

Pfft. Frickin' smooth, Elliot.

"Are you kidding? That's great news!" the Janitor exclaims, before he picks me up and hugs me. My feet dangle a few inches off the floor and I uncertainly hug him back, grateful that he's not too tight and potentially hurting the baby.

The baby…

Aaaand, my hormones kick off again and I'm sobbing into his jumpsuit that isn't actually a jumpsuit. Great. He plops me back down again and stares at me.

"What's wrong?" he asks again, "I thought you'd be happy."

"I am!" I lie, wiping my eyes, "It's just…not how I expected it to be."

"Well, who is the guy? Is it Scooter? Did he hurt you? Cos I'll take care of him, if you know what I –"

"No!" I cry, stopping him from torturing JD anymore than he already does, "It's not JD's."

He blinks at me, evidently thrown, "J…D…?"

"JD?" I repeat, confused, "You torture him all the time? Day dreams a lot? Scooter?"

"Oh, right."

I nod, before daring to ask, "How should I tell him?"

"Who, Scooter?"

"No! The father!"

He breathes out and looks me straight in the eye, "Well, to-the-point's probably the best. You get it down quicker and can decide what to do quicker. No point beating around the bush, right?"

I deflate slightly, knowing that he's right. The quicker I tell Dr. Cox, the quicker we can make a choice about the baby. Our baby.

"Or, you could get one of the sky writers to, you know, write it across the sky, in huge letters, spelling it out, like, You're Having A Baby! I do know a guy – he does it really cheap, especially to blondes. Or – "

"Thank you, Janitor," I interrupt before he gets me to tattoo it on my forehead, "But I think I'll just do the to-the-point thing."

The Janitor sighs and tuts, "That's what they always choose."

I smile and grip his hands in a way of thanks, before quickly adding, "By the way, don't say anything! You're the only person in this hospital who knows about this."

"Oh, really?" he smiled, slightly suspiciously, "Well, I'm the only person in the hospital who knows a lot of things…"

"Like what?"

He double-takes and takes a few steps back, "Well, if I told you, I wouldn't be the only one who knew them! Silly Blonde Doctor…"

Then he opens the door, and strolls off. A few moments later, he reappears, grabs a few cans of honey, and walks away again. I just laugh – the Janitor's hilarious!

It's left to me to turn off the light bulb and shut the closet door behind me. I do so with a smile, before I spin around to the busy hallway – to real life. My smile washes away and I'm left with the fear and nausea everyone in this place gets when they have to tell Dr. Cox something he doesn't want to hear.

Before I can do anything, there is a loud scream and JD, covered in a mysterious golden substance, slips down the hallway in front of me, before crashing into a conveniently placed ladder. Normally, I would rush over and make sure he's okay, but today I have bigger problems to deal with - sorry, JD. Plus, since he's in a hospital, I already know he's fine…or will be fine…

I sigh, ignoring my rambling thoughts, before turning towards the nurses' station. I'm praying to every god that I've ever heard of that he's busy, that he has something that needs doing. But nope, there he is, leaning on the counter and studying a chart. Still without lab coat, which I don't mind. Mmm…

Snap out of it, Elliot!!!

Come on, girl, you can do this. Just walk over there, totally confident, and demand to talk to him! Tell him that you're having this baby, and nothing he can say can change that!

Of course, I don't do that … instead, I quietly shuffle past, head bowed, hoping he doesn't notice me. No such luck.

"Barbie!"

I glance at him, and bite my lower lip in fear. He's forgotten about his chart, leaving it on the desk of the empty nurses' station and striding towards me. He looks sort of angry – his grey eyes just smoldering – STOP IT, ELLIOT! For frick's sake! Yes, he is attractive, but that doesn't mean I am attracted to him –

"Barbie! Stop staring at me and snap out of it!"

My head jerks as I realize I have been staring at him, and he is now mere inches away, walking in step with me.

"Now, normally I would go out of my way to avoid you and your ability to annoy me non-stop," he begins as we walk, "But this morning, you somehow manage to not completely irritate me, which frankly worries me, because…you never stop annoying me! So, as much as it pains me to say it, I'm going to ask you what you meant by 'I'm sorry' and if you're…alright."

He spits out the last word like it's the last thing he wants to say, but it makes my heart soars to hear it. He cares about me! He's concerned for me! Of course, he would never admit it, but surely you can't deny that!

"So…tell me," Dr. Cox presses, "Tell me now so I can go away."

Oh God. Oh, fricking God. This is it – my one chance to tell him without chickening out. And even though I'm fricking terrified, I'm going to grab this chance – to hell with the consequences.

"Dr. Cox…I have something important to tell you…"

You can all guess what's happening next chapter then. Yes? Good?

So, yes, the Janitor is wildly OOC (I think…), but it is midnight, so can I have a little slack please? :) In fact, everyone was probably OOC, so my apologies. And I have no idea how Dr. Cox will react – any suggestions would be very welcome!!

Anyway, last but not least, please review!

P.S. Yes, I think Dr. Cox is very attractive. xP :D