Idle Solicitude

When she brings ramen, try not to act like your desperately trying to get a hold of the heavenly sent food,

Even though you are.

When she smiles at you, try to keep that blush from creeping up.

When she cries, attempt to comfort her.

Even though at the end you always seem to make her mad.

But her being mad is better than her tears.

When you smell the other scent, try to make yourself stay.

But you know you can't.

Even though you love her more than the other.

And that your heart breaks when she gives that sad smile, telling you to go after her.

But you can't help it.

You made a promise.

Even if that promise breaks another.

But sometimes you don't realize when you take it too far.

Especially when she asked you to stay with her just this once –

And instead you left.

And your heart cracks,

Knowing that she's crying at this moment,

And that she'll have her broken smile,

And that you were the one that caused it.

But you still went to see your deceased ex-lover,

What you didn't know before you left,

Was that she had enough.

But you only found that out when you came back to the group to find her gone.

And after checking the well and not finding her there,

And after being missing for a few nights,

You know,

That she's had enough.

When you're trying to hide your worry from everyone else,

The task becomes difficult around a monk who somehow knows you so well.

And try to hide your overwhelming worry when she comes back covered in blood.

But also try to hide your anger when you find your half brother's scent all over her.

Try to fight your jealousy as you yell at her.

And with a first yell, there's always a second.

And somehow, the argument led to Kikyo.

And try to not look surprised when the kit looks at you with a resentment that he's never had before.

When she announces that she's leaving,

Attempt to bottle your feelings down.

Even if those feelings included shock, anger, and sadness.

When you tell her how much of a better being Kikyo is,

Try to keep your face neutral as she slaps you.

But you didn't succeed.

As if hiding that shock wasn't big enough,

Her next words added a castle full of shock.

When she turns to leave after telling him her love for him no longer exists,

Stop her with all you've got,

Because no one leaves if you don't want them to.

And you don't want her to leave.

And so you try to stop her.

That is until the stupid kit attempts to bite your hand off.

When she starts walking away,

Tell her that you love her.

Because you do.

Even if you love the other one, too.

When she tells you that she doesn't believe your lies and that you can't have them both,

Try, try, TRY to keep your mouth from going wide open. (Kagome's never talked like that before!)

But you never really were good at when it came to hiding things.

When the time comes when you really hate the cold,

Now's the time,

Because your body is frozen solid,

Not moving as she leaves.

When your friends leave you, leaving you with the only other optional friend,

You realize how much you miss everybody.

And how much you miss having a conversation,

Especially when you're stuck with a dead miko.

And with another miko glued to your mind.

When the undead miko tells you that Kagome is with Sesshomaru,

You can't help but get angry.

And being the sort of thick headed person you are,

You don't even think of the consequences as you leave at that exact moment.

Your mind is on Kagome.

And on Kagome only.

You will have her.

Angry and packing,

Inuyasha

~PCA