Heart In A Headlock
Disclaimer: Disclaimed, hos.
Author's Note: So I've realized that this story is pretty alternate-universe. I mean, they're not all dead and I don't have any plans of including Narnia (as awesome of a place as it is, I'm a big coward and couldn't risk writing a Narnia scene badly). I also am realizing it's very movie based. I could just go grab the books off my shelf upstairs and refresh my memory but…yeah, no. Too lazy. Nevertheless, I hope you enjoy it.
Oh, and yes. Edmund has sleep apnea. Clearly.
Chapter Four: Keep Keeping Me Awake
"How was school?" Mrs. Pevensie pressed her children to speak at the dinner table in the hours following the kiss. Neither of them showed any signs of speaking at all, and their mother could not quite figure out what was supposed to be going on. She assumed the children had just bickered and were now in the stage of ignoring each other. Edmund sat slouched in his chair, fork dangling out of his left hand. He picked at his plate of beef hash absentmindedly, occasionally glancing across the table at Lucy.
Lucy sat opposite her brother, and much unlike him, she sat with her usual good posture. Her neck was bent slightly to the right and she stared straight down into her food as she ate and did not dare look anywhere else. She chewed, swallowed, set her fork down, took a sip of water, picked up her fork again, and resumed eating. She repeated this cycle for several minutes until her mother asked how school had been. Lucy hesitated and waited to see if Edmund planned on answering.
There was silence.
Lucy finished chewing and swallowed. "Was fine," she answered. "We're learning about the Napoleonic Wars in history." She figured this answer would satisfy her mother's curiosity and need to make small talk at the supper table, but she did not wish to sit around and be further inquired to the point at which it was obvious she did not actually go to school today, so she put her fork down and asked, "Is there dessert? I'm feeling a bit full."
Mrs. Pevensie sat at her end of the table and watched her daughter. "I baked a batch of biscuits yesterday if you'd like some of those. But otherwise, no." She focused her attention on her son. "How about you, Edmund, would you like a biscuit or two?"
Edmund shook his head. "No thanks, Mum."
Lucy could feel Edmund's eyes on her, and she could feel her skin crawling. Quickly she muttered, "May I be excused?" and without waiting for her mother's answer, she stood up, pushed in her chair, and darted down the hall and up the stairs. She grabbed her pajamas out of her bedroom and headed for the bathroom, where she slowly changed into her nightgown and pulled her fuzzy pink bathrobe over her cold arms. Despite the heat of earlier hours, Lucy's body now felt freezing. She took a long look at herself in the mirror. Her face was quite red, actually, and felt hot to the touch. "Perhaps I have a fever." If she was sick, it would explain her odd behavior as of recent. And she could blame her actions on being ill.
Quickly Lucy pulled her long, brown hair into a ponytail and went back into her bedroom, where she climbed into bed. She laid on her side, staring at her sister Susan's empty bed and tried to rely on the clock's ticking to ease her into a dreamless sleep.
Sleep never came and she couldn't hear the clock at all. It seemed to have stopped. Maybe the second hand was stuck, like her brain was stuck on thoughts of – "UGH," she groaned and rolled onto her back.
When Lucy flicked on the small lamp on her desk, the hour and minute hands told her it was a little after eleven o'clock. She had lain awake for the last four hours. She blinked wearily at the little clock and turned around so that she was facing the door. She strode across the small room in her bare feet and opened the door quietly, crossed the hall, and opened the door to Edmund's bedroom as silently as possible.
What was she doing? She shouldn't be in here, she told herself. It was a bad idea to encourage whatever was happening to herself and her big brother, and she could not kid herself into thinking it was only a spot of sibling bonding, something that was normal, because it was clearly not normal. They were both old enough to understand the possibility of what could happen if they allowed themselves to take it too far, and while this thought scared Lucy to death, she still found herself crossing the dark room. She sat down on Peter's bed, which was pushed right up under the windows. Edmund almost always slept with all the windows wide open, and the wind had picked up since nightfall. It played with Lucy's hair as she lay on the made-up bed and watched the dark, sleeping form on the other side of the room.
She listened. She could hear his breathing – it was slow and hollow as if the air he was breathing was being sucked into an infinite abyss. Somewhere in that infinite abyss was Edmund Pevensie's heart, and a lump formed in Lucy's throat as the desire to press her ear to his chest just to hear his heartbeat washed over her.
Lucy sat up and crossed the room. She kneeled down by Edmund's bedside and held her breath, listening for the sound of his heartbeat. She was being daft, surely there was no way she could hear it from here, but maybe, just maybe she wouldn't have to touch him. She closed her eyes as the wind from the windows swept through her hair and tickled the back of her neck.
Edmund was lying on his back, left arm outstretched off the edge of the bed, so that his fingers were just inches away from the place where Lucy knelt. Lucy couldn't see this, of course, because it was so dark, but she knew she was too close. She shouldn't be encouraging this. So why was she?
Suddenly Edmund's breathing halted. Lucy's eyes fluttered open, every single muscle in her body freezing. Was her brother awake? Was he dead? Before she had time to panic, Lucy heard his slow, light breathing resume, and she let out a loud sigh of relief. Her loud exhalation startled Edmund from his sleep, and he stirred in his bed, sitting up slightly. Lucy stumbled backward, away from the bed, and landed on her butt, right in the middle of the floor.
Edmund called out, "Lucy?" His eyes focused a little and he saw a dark form sitting on the floor. "What are you doing?"
Lucy crawled over to his bedside and rested her chin on the mattress. She sighed. "You were keeping me up."
"I was keeping you up? How was I…what?"
"Not you, really. I was just thinking about you." She swallowed, hard, and blinked. A slight discomfort took over her, and she regretted leaving her bedroom. There was silence when it was Edmund's turn to speak.
Lucy blinked back the tears forming in her eyes. "I'm sorry," she muttered. She stood up. "I'll leave."
"No, you don't have to," Edmund called after her, and immediately she felt his strong arms around her waist and chest, pulling her back. She turned around and pressed her face into Edmund's chest, her hot tears soaking through his shirt. Edmund pressed against her and wrapped her fully in his arms. "What's wrong, Lu?"
"Don't you hate me?"
Edmund pressed his face into her hair. "No, never. It's the total opposite, Lu." He paused. "But I shouldn't have kissed you. I'm sorry if I confused you." Lucy frantically shook her head and lifted her head, causing Edmund to bang his chin on her forehead. She stood up on her tiptoes and pressed her lips to his, this time more willingly than the time before.
Edmund returned her kiss. In a low voice he muttered, "You're…right. We…shouldn't…do this." He kissed her between each word and steered her back toward his bed with his hands on her waist.
Lucy inhaled unevenly and replied, "I don't care if it's wrong, Ed. I don't care anymore." She had her arms wrapped around his neck as he softly pushed her down onto the bed, where they then rested on his chest as she kissed him. Her fingertips played with the bottom of his shirt and lightly stroked the skin below his bellybutton. Edmund groaned and pulled away from the kiss, pressing a firm hand over her mouth. "Not now, Luc. Just…sleep now, okay? Go to sleep." Lucy nodded and he removed his hand. She laid her head on his chest and her hand found his under the covers, where their fingers tightly intertwined. The sound of Edmund's heartbeat lulled Lucy to sleep, and for the first time in a long time, her brother hadn't kept her awake.