Chapter Four

The Escape

They waited until after curfew check to leave. Julian decided to do it this way, because though he was an adult and perfectly capable of leaving on his own- and Jamie would be 18 in just over a month- Julian wasn't actually sure they were allowed to leave. At least not without telling the person at the security desk that they were leaving. He was through with Logan's ridiculous rules though! Even if it did kind of make sense to him that they needed to know who was on the grounds in case of an emergency- There he went again, being understanding of Logan's overbearing and medieval way of running things!

He'd even left a note in the front office informing Wanda (who was now Logan's Assistant Headmaster) that he would be gone for a few days so she could re-schedule his classes. He'd also left his lesson plans for the next week as well as the homework he had finished grading before he left…Not for Logan but because it was the right thing to do for the kids.

Though he did consider just pitching his entire briefcase in the pool twice before heading to the office. If not for the fact that John was on night patrol tonight, and Julian was especially susceptible to John's 'logical' brainwashing, he might have done it. He didn't want to be trapped here until the end of the schoolyear! He would be, if he ran into John or Wanda or Kitty or Pete or especially Logan… Wade it was a toss-up, and Jean and Emma were the worst. They could make him change his mind completely. No it was best to escape unnoticed.

In hindsight, if one wants to escape unnoticed, one would likely want to avoid taking the loudest car in the garage… or screaming into the intercom" You can't stop me this time Logan, I'm finally free of your insane dictatorship!"

It may be advisable as well, that if one wanted to avoid Logan's wrath and possibly him following, one may wish to borrow any car other than Logan's. Julian wasn't thinking clearly however, and it seemed like the best idea at the time.

Jamie frowned as he watched the side view mirror, ignoring Julian's cackling. Julian finally noticed Jamie wasn't joining in his fun after about five miles, and asked the younger boy what was wrong. Jamie sighed in return before pointing toward the rear window as he said. "Logan sent someone after us."

"Impossible! Logan was asleep when we left, even he's not that fast."

"Logan wasn't asleep. We left ten minutes after bed-check. Logan never goes to sleep before second bed check at two am. Why do you think he's so cranky in the morning? He was probably in his room, reading through his charts when we left, since it isn't his night for rounds."

"… How do you know all that? Never mind! Why wouldn't he just follow us himself if it's him? I think you're just getting paranoid in your old age."

"It's Wade's car. Besides Logan wouldn't leave right now, not after what happened today. He's far too busy trying to decide who it was that let the Salesmen get to him… and at dinner he announced a crackdown on all rules, because the Baby threat has increased."

"He what? Never mind. It can't be Wade; they won't know were gone yet."

"Yeah, because screaming into the intercom was really stealthy." Jamie muttered before pulling out his phone and typing a text.

Julian pretended not to hear Jamie's jab and though he was curious who Jamie could be texting this late at night when all of Jamie's friends were in bed back at Xavier's he decided to mind his own business. After all, it was a slippery slope to Logan, and the first step was curiosity.

~o~O~o~

John had just finished his rounds and was about to head to his apartment, and hopefully sleep before any of his children needed him, when Julian's voice came through the loudspeakers. Wade came into the hallway, as John sighed. So much for sleep. Wanda appeared in the doorway to their rooms a moment later, with John's uniform and fuel pack. "You know I know you know you're going with Wade. Just be careful, don't burn down anything important, and try to get back here by Friday. You agreed to have dinner with my dad, you WILL be there for it."

"Thanks, Love. Wait that's Friday? I thought I put it off a month?"

"That was a month ago John. Just be careful. Wade…never mind, just don't kill my husband."

"No promises. I still suspect he may be involved in the elf-cookie-crisis of Christmas."

"There was no- Never mind. Just go before you wake the kids."

Wade shrugged, and John followed behind (at a safe distance) as they went to the garage to grab a car and follow Julian. Whenever this sort of thing happened it was important to approach with caution… though at this point John wasn't sure if that meant Julian and Wade.

Thanks to Remy no longer being a member of the team, John frequently was partnered with Wade. John was hyper, with a short attention-span, and tended to randomly burst into either insane ramblings or for some reason, songs. Aside from Remy and Wanda, no one else wanted to work with John. No one, even his wife Emma, wanted to work with Wade thanks to his own random ramblings, so they were by default stuck together.

This on one hand was good as they didn't drive anyone else insane when stuck in a car with them for hours, on the other hand it was bad, in that they both would forget what it was they were doing in the car to begin with. Which is how after following Julian out of the city and most of the night, they ended up, not near the motel the boys stopped at, but some fifty miles away in the opposite direction, terrorizing a small café.

Wade had decided he was hungry. John had agreed that food was needed…and coffee because for some reason Wanda wouldn't let him drink coffee at home. Julian slipped away from them unnoticed as they argued over where to stop to eat.

"Anywhere that serves coffee is going to have breakfast foods, and it's too early for breakfast! We are stopping at a taco place and using the drive-thru. We are on an important mission!" Wade yelled.

"It's never too early for pancakes, and we need coffee." John said, as he grabbed the wheel before Wade could turn into the parking lot of an all-night taco stand.

"Please! Breakfast is for daylight hours otherwise the elves can sprinkle their mind dust on the food and-did you say pancake? I love pancakes! Pancakes aren't breakfast, they're cakes! It says so in their name. Where can we get these pancakes?" Wade said, as both men ignored the angry horns of the three cars they nearly hit in the struggle for the wheel.

John pointed to the café sign down the road and they headed in that direction, forgetting all about following Julian, or the near-wreck they caused behind them, or that John had been strictly forbidden from any form of caffeine after he's drank that twelve pack of cola and decided Ororo's flowers would be much prettier if they were on fire.

They arrived at the café, in good spirits and rather calm (for them), but things escalated quickly, as they often did when the two of them were unsupervised. It started when the waitress asked what they would like to order, and for reasons only Wade could understand, he decided she was an agent of the Elves.

While Wade screamed in the poor woman's face about her attempting to undermined the integrity of the fabric of the universe, John slipped into the kitchen to see if they had a phone he could use to call his wife. He'd left his phone on the charger in the car, and had just remembered that he had promised to call home if ever he decided to go out to eat with Wade.

The kitchen was small, but clean, with shiny metal surfaces and a large gas stove. The stove was the problem, because four of its burners were on, and the happily dancing blue flames called to John. Before anyone knew what was happening, the cook, the waitress, and four customers were hiding in the ladies' bathroom, while the other five customers escaped into the parking lot, and Wade destroyed the café's tables with his sword while dancing fire-monkeys spun around the dining room.

The police arrived a few minutes later, while Wade threw pieces of former tables to the fire-monkeys and newly formed fire-lions to consume. Wade was still screaming loudly to anyone who could hear him about the dangers to the universe as they knew it.

"Sir, please set down the swords, and step outside." Said one of the police officers. An older man with a balding head and grey eyebrows. He had the misfortune of having been on other calls involving Wade in the past. Unfortunately for him, because he had managed to diffuse the insane former mercenary before, he was now the one they sent in when such calls arrived.

Wade recognized the police officer and with a huge grin that no one could see under his mask, he came running out of the café to greet the officer. "Ed! How's the family? Good? Good! I need your help, there's a young lady in here who is clearly a spy and I need you to arrest her before she completely undoes the universe. Now I would just take care of her myself, but my wife tells me that if I want to stay 'former' that means I can't just take care of it myself and that is why we have police officers, though mostly the problem is, between you and me, that they keep hiding my weapons from me because for some reason they think I'm dangerous or something like that, which makes no sense. I work at a school, I would never hurt the children, so why should I be unarmed? What if we are invaded, or attacked, or the can opener breaks? Then what are we going to do if I don't have my swords or knives or guns or bombs? You blow a hole in the wall one time – okay so it was four- and all of a sudden your own wife feels it's safer if you give up the bazooka, how does that make sense?"

Ed, the police offer, just shrugged his shoulders and followed Wade back into the café. It was easier than arguing with the masked madman, and really he had no idea what the man was talking about anyway. In all his time on the police force they had never received a call about anyone shooting a hole in walls, and considering the other things this guy went on about, Ed figured it was just another one of Wade's rambles and had no truth behind it.

Inside John was still playing with his fire-creatures, as he cackled madly and demanded to know where everyone went. He still had not received his coffee.