Wolf: Wow. This is probably the fastest I've ever gotten reviews. Thanks you so much, everybody! You guys rock Dobby's socks! (Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter).

Disclaimer: I don't own Lord of the Rings, Power Rangers, or The Princess Bride.

16: I will not shout "GO, GO, POWER RANGERS!" before slipping on the One Ring.

Frodo glanced despairingly at the surrounding Ringwraiths. This was hopeless! They were all going to die horrid, painful deaths! But he had the Ring...the One Ring to rule them all, blah, blah, blah, you now the story.

Frodo snatched up the One Ring. "GO, GO, POWER RANGERS!"

Sam, Pippin, and Merry all gaped at the spot where Frodo had just been, shaking their heads at the mindless hobbit.

17: I will not give a hobbit a pedicure.

Legolas stroked Pippin's hideous toenail with practiced grace. The shiny red paint quickly spread over the yellow piece of dead cells, making it shiny and refreshed. "You have go in nice, easy strokes like this, see?"

Gandalf was suddenly standing over them. "Legolas Greenleaf, what are you doing?"

Legolas smiled. "Oh, you know, just helping improve the beauty of a hobbit. Their feet really need work!"

Gandalf backed away, disturbed.

18: Wormtongue is not listed on the Middle-earth sexual predator list, no matter how creepy he is.

Eowyn sighed as she brooded within the court of Rohan. This sucked royal Oliphant! King Théoden was reduced to nothing more than a rumpled sack of potatoes, Eomer was far away (and Eowyn didn't know if she'd ever see him again), she was trapped forever in this prison, and worst of all, she was being stalked by--

"Hello, my dear." Clenching her fists, Eowyn spun to face Grima Wormtongue, the planet's most vile and disgusting creeper. "Your uncle is not doing so well, I fear."

Eowyn smirked. "You know, you should back off right now."

Wormtongue just frowned. "And why is that?"

Eowyn placed her hand on a well-hidden sword. "Didn't you know? You're on Middle-earth's sexual predator list."

Astounded, Wormtongue leapt backwards. After about ten seconds, he regained his composure. "Sexual predator list? Silly girl, there is no such thing!"

Eowyn tightened her grip on the sword, grinning. "Wanna bet?"

In all technicality, Eowyn had all rights to attacking and maiming Wormtongue. So she did. After all, it was all in self-defense, right?

19: I am not the Dread Pirate Roberts.

"MWUAHAHA!" Aragorn cried as he unleashed his sword. "Friends! Enemies! Quadrupeds! All shall fear me!"

Everyone else was silent. It was now nighttime, so the Fellowship had settled down to relax for the night. Frodo, Sam, Merry, Pippin, Gandalf, Boromir, Legolas, and Gimli didn't even bother to gaze upwards at the strange Ranger. "And why should we fear you, Aragorn?" asked Boromir, indifferent to Aragorn's exclamation.

"Isn't it obvious? I'm the Dread Pirate Roberts!" Aragorn yanked a black hood over his head. "EVIL SHALL RUE THE DAY THEY STOLE MY PRINCESS BRIDE! DUN, DUN, DUN!"

20: I will not send Gollum to rehab.

"Must have the Precious!" Gollum shrieked as Sam slipped the rope around Gollum's neck. Gollum grasped at the taut rope, but to no avail.

Frodo frowned. "Sam, we should take him with us. And take the rope off, it's painful to him!"

Sam opened his mouth to loudly protest, but then he shut it. There was a better plan, right? There had to be! And just like that, BOOM! He had one.

"Mister Frodo, I have an idea..."

Soon...

"NO! NOT THERE! SMEAGOL DOESN'T WANT TO GO THERE!" But Frodo and Sam simply shook their heads as they dragged a kicking and screaming Gollum into the rehabilitation center.

A man dressed in simple, pristine white clothes was waiting for them. "Hello. Has your friend recently been acting completely out of control, attacking, biting, and sometimes attempting to steal your shiny jewelry due to a peculiar addiction of some sort?"

Dang, this guy sure knew what he was talking about! "Yes, we are." Frodo responded.

The two hobbits handed Gollum's leash to the man; he didn't even blink at the sight of the ropes wrapped around Gollum's neck. Then the two headed off into the distance, traveling to the perilous Mordor.

Wolf: So what was your favorite? I liked 20!

Anyways, eighty more to go! The last five will be incredibly epic, I assure you. I'll save most of the best for last.

For all of you Harry Potter or Star Wars fans, I have another story in the works that I'll start once I finish one of my current stories! You can vote on which one on my profile.