The Box
Formerly titled 'What Goes On'
By Christine Lennoire

Chapter Four
It's Not My Fault!

.: IT'S NOT MY FAULT:.

Those days had been the worst days of his life. All day, he was stuck inside this large room, confined to a small corner... trying to stay as far away from the door as possible. For when it opened, it was always Akito, who came to 'play' with him. His games were sick and twisted, and Yuki had all the scars to prove it. He was a cruel master, who only searched to ease his own pain by inflicting it upon others. Complete and unending pain... that was his curse. No matter what he did to try and ease the raging fire in his soul, he could not. Each time he tried, it only got larger, as if laughing to spite him horribly.

Akito told him this once. He blamed Yuki for everything – because there was no one to blame. From the moment he was born, destiny had marked him doomed to ache like this until his early death. Yet he couldn't accept this, so he had to find someone to blame, even if it was someone completely innocent. It ate him alive when he couldn't put some kind of reasoning behind it. Because then, he had to admit that he never had a chance, and that he had been spited even before he was born. That was unacceptable.

However, Yuki was wrong. Now he knew better, but... when he was little, he only know what went on in that room. That room had been his entire world at that time. Nothing on the outside reached him and he was all alone. Isolated and lonely, his only companion was Akito – who whipped him senselessly to try and ease his own suffering, only to have it come back double – and then come back swinging harder each time – taking out his rage on Yuki. Everyone in the family hated him because he was the favorite... what they envied him for though... he would have been glad to give to any one of them if they really wanted it...

Really... but one day, something strange and horrible happened. Shigure, who felt bad for the poor kid – let him out. Being close to Akito, Shigure was able to see what was really going on, and knew that Yuki was no one to be envious of. But Akito found it. And Akito lashed out. He attempted to kill Shigure and everyone else, saying that this family was getting out of his control and that he had to stop them before there was some kind of full-scale uprising. He hated anyone who acted out against him, and something like this was enough to drive him over the edge.

Yuki had been looked up for days after that incident. Akito never left his side. In a crazed state – Akito kept telling Yuki it was all his fault. He repeated it over and over and hit him too many times to count. Soon, he had gotten so far inside Yuki's brain that he was unable to tell the truth from what Akito told him. Soon... he really started to believe that he had done it. And then... Akito gave him the box... he put all the things in it that Tohru had seen including his whip – and told Yuki that he was banished from now on.

Luckily... Shigure took him in, regardless of all that happened. Yuki never asked him why he was being so nice. For days he couldn't say anything. That was when Kyo started bugging him. Kyo knew he fell out with Akito and thought he could rub it in – in Yuki's emotional state, it worked real well, but Kyo was tired of getting nothing but sobs from the boy. So that was when the fighting really started. And it hadn't stopped since. Kyo knew he couldn't like Yuki... he was the rat after all. He never was able to look beyond the story of the Zodiac and see who Yuki was.

Mostly because Yuki didn't want anyone to see. But then, Tohru Honda came and turned his life around. She made him smile, and cared about him – even if he was an anti-social. And it wasn't because he was the prince or because he was good looking – she was able to look past that and show him the good qualities that he had forgotten he possessed. Through all her kindness, she was able to save him in more than one way, and he would be damned to hell before he would let her leave his life forever before being able to at least try and tell her the truth...

"Miss Honda..." Finally he found her. She had gotten pretty far. But she wasn't moving now. She was face down in the dirt and breathing heavily. Yuki picked her up and dusted her off carefully, watching for any bruising she might have received from the fall. "You always were the clumsy one..." he grinned, seeing that she was not seriously hurt."Miss Honda, I am so sorry... all this time I was so cold and I could not tell you the things that were killing me the most... and I only realized the truth once it was too late..."

Her eyes were opening slowly, and she was coming to. "Y-yuki?" she asked, looking at him closely. "Oh! Yuki!" she gasped sitting up. "I... you didn't... did you?" she asked weakly, looking at him with watery eyes. "Did you really do all the things Akito said you did?" He could tell she was shaky and obviously very nervous. For the first time, though, he was able to smile genuinely and shake his head.

"No, Miss Honda. But I thought I did." He said, matter-of-factly. "For a long time Akito messed with my head and got me convinced that I had done it. Akito was always good at blaming others. Like Kana... I was a victim. And like Kana... I wasn't able to realize that the things he said were just lies meant to hurt me and clear his own conscious. But... unlike Kana... I was able to overcome his lies and deceit. Miss Honda... I'm sorry you had to see that... all that... was the work of Akito..."

Slowly, her nervous frown turned into a smile. "Haha." she laughed. "I'm so stupid. I should know better than to believe that. You could never hurt anyone Yuki! I'm so sorry... I broke my own promise. I... I just got so scared... but... you came all this way... looking for me?" Yuki nodded wordlessly. "Thank you... I... I want to go home, Yuki. It's time you got rid of that box once and for all, you know." she said, standing up with his help. With a smile, he agreed. Now that he knew the truth... he knew that that box didn't belong to him, and he didn't need to be plagued with the sight of it every day and night..."

"Yes... I believe Akito needs it back. Wouldn't want him to forget his sins... that's what it is... a reminder..." he said. Yuki felt her hand tighten around his and he blushed slightly. "Thank you, Miss Honda... for understanding. Most people wouldn't have waited for me to explain." he said honestly. She blushed and smiled. "I am truly blessed by having such a wonderful family... that means you too, Miss Honda. Yes... you are a Honda... but you are also a Sohma." Her eyes widened, as did her smile.

Tohru really beamed. "Thank you! Thank you so very much! You don't know how much that means to me!" she said, looking him square in the eyes. "You guys are the only real family I have left, besides Uo and Hana... So it means a lot to me that you think of me as part of your family too!"

"But I don't think I could get used to saying Miss Sohma..." Yuki laughed. "No... you'd have to be a... a-a Mrs. Sohma..." he choked and blushed. Tohru turned red as a beat and he grinned. "But it sounds good... Mrs. Tohru Sohma." he laughed at her embarassed state. But she was happy, even so. Yuki has changed so much, in so short of a time. I hate to think of what went on to make him this way... but to see him loosening up... it makes me so happy to see him happy again. He hasn't smiled like that in so long...

Akito's fate is regrettable. I still feel bad for him... it's true his destiny is beyond his control and he'll die for something that's not even his fault. But he could find better ways to find happiness... I know that. If he learned to just enjoy what life he has, he would be much happier than he is trying to blame and hurt others. If only he could see that... I wish I could show him that there is a good way of life, even knowing that he's going to die soon... it doesn't mean he has to give up on living now while he's still breathing...

But for right now, I'm going to focus on living my life... with the Sohmas, nothing is ever boring. I'm learning new things every day – about Yuki... about Kyo... and all the Zodiac members. It makes me happy to be so close to all of them. Because I really do see them as the only family I have now. I will never forget mom... but I can't change the past... so I'm going to live for right now. What do you think, mom? Aren't the Sohmas just so wonderful? I can't imagine my life without them now... they have become such a large part of it...

I am happy...

And I want all the Sohmas to be happy too...

If that means I have to open the lid of every box I come across... and handle all the demons in the world... I would do it... just to make these people happy... to repay them for the kindness they have shown me in a time when I couldn't find any in anyone else anywhere. Because I love the Sohmas... because they are the greatest thing that's happened to me since mom's death.

Seeing Yuki happy like this... I feel like my life just keeps getting better and better. It makes me feel so warm inside...

"Miss Honda? You zoned out again..."

Tohru blinked. "OH! I'm so sorry. I was just thinking about everything that's happened. I'm really happy to see you smiling again." she said, fighting the urge to hug him.

"You too, Miss Honda. For a while, I was afraid I was going to lose you..."

Tohru put on a brave face. "It'll take more than that to scare me away!" Yuki laughed at her wide variety of facial expressions. She always knew what to say or do to make him feel so much better.

"I'm glad Miss Honda... because I really enjoy my time spent with you. I wish Akito could see what I see... he'd be a much happier person." he said, ruffling her hair and giving her a quick kiss. For the first time – it wasn't his brotherly kiss on the forehead. He was getting bolder. So he kissed her on the cheek. I'm not quite there yet... but one day... I will be able to show her how I really feel. He told himself. I'm not a monster... but I'm not a prince. I'm just a person with just as much a chance in this world as anybody else. But most of all... I want to see Miss Honda's smile...

"Let's go get something to eat... I'm starving!" Tohru said, blushing at the sound of her rumbling tummy.

Yuki laughed. "I won't make you cook. Let's go out." he said, leading her towards the nearest place where they could get some good take-out food, completely forgetting about Shigure and Kyo, when neither of them knew where they were. Tohru didn't seem to notice, and Yuki wasn't going to tell her and make her worry... for now... he just wanted to enjoy the moments with Tohru...

Okay, this is not the end. There was a little hint that said such, but not everyone may have caught it. So – there's going to be at least one more chapter, if not more. Please review and tell me what you think of it so far – and how long you think I should make this, along with any suggestions that you have. That would be greatly appreciated.

REVIEW PLEASE!

Hope you enjoyed it!

Christine Lennoire