Kim Possible and all related material ©Walt Disney Company 2002-2007. See top of part 1 for full disclosure.
"But Wait… There's More!"
Pt 4 "Optional Features"
By: Eoraptor
Middleton, Colorado
Lobby, Schlitz Carlton Hotel
"Pick your jaw up, doofus." Shego smirked as she and Kim strode up to Ron and Monique. "I know I'm damned hot, but don't make a scene, huh? People will think we're involved… especially your girlfriend."
Kim and Monique laughed softly, because it was clear Shego was not the one Ron was drooling over. As usual, the sight of the infamous little black dress had short circuited Ron's psyche, and his eyes were following her as she moved as if they were physically connected to her backside. Smiling softly, she patted him on the cheek a few times, and he came back to reality, albeit reluctantly.
"Uh-hu… Sorry KP… you know what that dress does to me…" The blond boy rubbed at the back of his neck, his cheeks turning ruddy. "You look spankin' too Shego, Definitely beats that weird green and black dress you had at the Bermuda Triangle."
"Hey… I'll have you know that was a Giana Fettuccini original, Stoppable." The emerald clad woman snorted derisively. "Designed specifically for me, I might add, not stolen or anything."
"Oh! Hehehe… sorry." Ron looked down, but then back up, because he had forgotten Kim was now standing right in front of him and looking down meant looking down her dress and into her cleavage; which threatened to send him off into lala land again. "…um… can we go now?"
Monique nodded her agreement with the sentiment of getting going. She was clad in a stylish pant-suit with a flared collar and bell-bottomed pants, black with crème pinstripes. Add to that her short mule boots and the hat she wore and the ostentatious gold pocket watch, and she had a whole retro zoot-suit look assembled. "Yeah, Club Speed waits for no woman."
Ron was dressed sharply, but conservatively, and obviously with Monique's help. He wore a silk shirt of blood-red with mother-of-pearl buttons, and black slacks with a black belt and a highly polished gold buckle. Unfortunately, the caramel-colored girl had not been able to get him to forgo sneakers for proper dress shoes, so the whole look was spoiled by his ratty, worn-out white tennis shoes.
"Can I drive? Got the new wheels and everything!" He piped up, as if suddenly remembering that important fact.
Shego smirked softly, shaking her head and looking amongst her companions, "Well, unless you think three fine women like us are going to pile into Kimmie's little Roth Coupe in these outfits…? Yeah, we'll be taking your new Conquistador. I'll even let you drive."
Ron made a show of over wrought gratitude and submissiveness at the permission to drive them, then shot Kim a look of "you sure you're ready for this?" before holding the door for the three women. He smiled to each of his three "dates" as they passed, first Monique, then Shego, and finally Kim.
There was a tiny squeak from Ron, and he looked down to see Kim's hand retreating from delivering a pinch to his butt. She grinned at him innocently, "Of course I am… I'm Kim Possible, and I'm ready for anything. By the way, the slacks look great on you; and I love the shoes."
"Booyah!" he smiled his trademark goofy smile, and wondered not for the first time how he'd gotten lucky enough to earn Kim's love. "Hey Monique! She loves the shoes!"
-KP-KP-KP-KP-KP-KP-KP-KP-KP-KP-
Go-Jet 1
Airspace above Middleton Colorado
Not for the first time this evening, Sharon felt like she was flying over a war zone. First, there'd been the two odd looking jets sent up to "investigate" the Go Jet. She recognized them as those new YF-22's the Air Force had been experimenting with a few weeks ago- no, almost twelve years ago, she corrected herself. Now it seemed that they were called F-22 Raptors. She never thought that she'd be "encouraged" to drop to a lower altitude over U.S. soil by an armed fighter escort, but apparently this September 11 had changed a lot of things. The recent Alien Invasion obviously hadn't eased anyone's fears.
That invasion was the reason for the current incarnation of "war zone" she saw when she looked outside the Go Jet's cockpit. The Raptors had bugged off when they got the Go Jet's tail number and realized which team of super-heroes it belonged to. One even waved wings at her as they departed. That had been a few hours ago, over Go City; fortunately her brothers didn't seem to realize she had… procured… the jet yet. Now, the war zone feeling came back, as she looked over what were supposedly the ruins of Middleton Colorado's main Interstate artery.
"So this is what a city looks like after a few… what were they? War Lordian's? After a few of them come through, huh?" She talked to herself for lack of other things to do at the moment, and looked at the odd triangular craters that the alien things had apparently made when they landed. She remembered the footage of large robotic tanks straight out of H. G. Wells from the brief bit of TV she'd been allowed earlier today.
If she'd been thinking, and understood what "googling" was and that the Go Jet now had mobile internet; she'd have spent the time the jet was auto-piloting to Middleton finding out more about "War Lordians" and the invasion and Ron Stoppable and everything else she had questions about. As it was, Sharon had spent most of the time channel surfing radio stations, trying to find any good music… apparently Grunge was dead, much to her chagrin. Country, however, was now huge, along with this Brittina person…
That made Sharon shudder. Canned music was not her style, and the half-song of Brittina's she'd sat through had about rotted her teeth.
Finally she'd found a college rock station that played mostly the music she was used to. Fortunately it had good broadcast strength, so she received it for a good portion of the trip, right up until he had to begin her landing procedures. She sat the Go Jet down in some secluded woodland just outside of Middleton Proper and then sat back.
"Ya know, Sharon," she began to herself. She was checking that the backpack she had grabbed was well enough stocked after stumbling around in only the subdued light of the cockpit for twenty minutes, "You could have done this on the flight over; and have been thinking about how to get into the city and find this Possible girl, not doing it all spur of the moment like some villain escaping a lair."
Sighing wearily to herself, the teen bounded out of the Jet's cockpit after making sue she'd turned off all the transponders and locators she could think of. As she set out up the road toward Middleton, she sighed again and looked down at herself. She assumed, it being a Friday night, and this girl being just out of highschool, that She'd probably be at a concert or something.
"Yeah, and you're really dressed for moshing, aren't ya Sharon? Green and black spandex instead of your BUSH teeshirt and jeans. Why don't ya just wear a sign that says 'escaped cryo-kiddy, arrest me!'"
"Yeah Kid, why don't ya? It'd make it easier to find your wallet than your little Shego Halloween costume."
"Oh… just great!" the teen heroine groaned ran her fingers through her hair in frustration, setting her laden backpack down at her feet, "As if I didn't have enough problems."
Three big burlys came out of the woods at the side of the road, trying to look menacing with their baseball bats and knives. Against your basic, average girl they probably would have no trouble getting what they apparently wanted. Of course Sharon Sullivan wasn't your basic average girl, and this wasn't her basic average world.
"And you don't even fill it out like the real deal…" One of them grinned lecherously. At least Sharon assumed he grinned lecherously. It was freaking dark on the road and only the rising half moon provided light.
"Yeah, but I'll bet she's still fun for a ride. And hey, no claws to worry about like with Shego." Another one added, rubbing his hands together.
The teen shuddered at the thought of these three wanting even more from her than a few bucks. She was about to light up and deal with them as quickly as possible when the third of the group said something that caught her attention.
"Yeah, that bitch, worked us like rented mules she did! Always strutting around in her spandex like she owned the place instead of Doctor D! I say we take our frustrations out on this little number, huh boys?"
Sharon couldn't believe her luck. Not only had she been held up by three vagrant thugs who wanted to do impure things to her; but they had worked for her evil clone too boot, and had a grudge! "Fine fine… let's get this over with all ready."
The "fight" was over in ten seconds, if that. All three of them apparently had some ingrained response to green plasma power, because they froze when she lit up, each cupping his crotch or covering his eyes.
The first two went down with simple uppercuts to their chins, landing back in the woodland they had emerged from, not able to even groan in pain. That left the one with the odd accent and the "frustrations" to work out. By now, he was still protecting his delicate parts, but had dropped to his knees on the deserted asphalt.
"Please! Please don't hurt me! I'm sorry Mistress! We didn't know t'was really you!"
"Mistress?!" she mumbled to herself incredulously. What in the world kind of woman was this evil clone to make grown men call her Mistress? Well, then again, the clone was also a grown woman… so it wasn't quite as disgusting if she, a fifteen year old girl was doing it… but still!
"Oh Supreme One! Please, Forgive us ever doubting you!" the man had given up holding himself and was now actually groveling in the middle of the abandoned road.
Sharon tried to keep her eyebrows from shooting up at this second new moniker, and felt glad for the darkness to hide most of her expressions. She decided that if this thug in red was thinking she was some bad-assed evil clone with a dominatrix fetish, she would play along and get some information. Now… What had that thug said already? Something about a Doctor Dee? That must be that blue skinned weirdo she saw on TV earlier.
"Where is Doctor Dee? Tell me quickly, or you'll end up like those buddies of yours." She put her hands on her hips and tried her best to look imperious.
"He's still in Vienna for all I know, Miss Shego!" the man squeaked out compliantly and quickly. "After ya dumped him at tha' banquet last month, he fired all o' us henchmen and flew off!"
"Fired you, eh?" Sharon tried not to let the disappointment show in her voice as she eyed the 'hench-man.' He was badly over-weight, she realized as he cowered. He'd been sucking it in when they first approached.
"Yes Ma'am! He didna take well to your not liking his advances He didn't! Drunk or not, the Boss still gots pride!"
She scowled, but filed this info away for later use. It was a month out of date, as would be most of what she could get from these guys, but the fact that evil clone and this blue man were not involved was important information. Apparently it was a sore spot, with repercussions for these goons and Doctor Dee.
"Fine then. Where is Kim Possible?" she asked with authority. Then to add to the theatrical effect, she lit her hand again and made a fist, "You can at least tell me that much, right?"
"Eeep! Far as we know, last time she kicked our behinds fer looting, she was still staying at that there hotel Carlton!" the man cowered even lower, if that was possible, at the re-ignition of her hand. "We thought it was you she were travelin' with, but if'n you're here! It must be a syntho 902!"
Sharon desperately wanted to ask what that was, but she feared she would blow her cover if she did. "Fine Fine… how was this… 902 acting?"
"Just like you, Mistress! Cept she was palling around with Possible 'stead of tryin to defeat her like normal. Maybe the lil girl has a crush on you and stole a 902 to use as a play toy? Wouldn't surprise me after the way we fecked with her head last time one-"
Another plasma punch ended the interrogation right there. Still, it added a lot of confusing information to her inventory of new facts. Apparently her evil clone used to fight with Kim Possible. But now she was on her side? Maybe it was part of a greater evil plot by Clone Master to corrupt a young hero? The alternatives were even more disturbing… Her evil clone leading this girl on was scarier, because it meant that Warren had corrupted the clone with those wrong-headed thoughts she'd finally worked past herself a few months ago. What would that do to her good name as a hero?
"I could really use Agent Betty right about now… She'd know what to do here." Sharon sighed heavily and picked up her bag again. "And I've got to stop talking to myself… That's something Supervillains do. Well, Supervillains and Hego anyways."
-KP-KP-KP-KP-KP-KP-KP-KP-KP-KP-
Middleton, Colorado
Club Speed
Kim and Ron weren't exactly sure what they should be feeling or thinking at the moment, but the confusion on their faces must have been obvious to anyone watching them. Kim managed to compose herself, or at least feigned it by thumbing through her hand bag. Ron just gawked.
Monique and Shego were walking back from the dance floor, and a sheen of sweat was clearly visible on each of them. In fact, Monique was fanning herself with her hat as they sat down. Club Speed lived up to its name, and the two had just put on quite a show on the dance floor. Not that unusual in itself. Kim knew how well Shego moved from years of experience. Monique was a little more surprising, but not by much given her boisterous nature.
What had Ron's jaw once again dropped and Kim distracting herself with her lipstick was the fact that the two women had been dancing together… closely… the word gyrate came to mind.
"Phew! I really forgot how much fun it could be to go dancing with civilians! The Villain's Mixers got nothing on this." Shego took a long pull on her drink, putting away most of the long neck before setting the bottle down.
"I guess a lot of people got energy and stress to burn off tonight, girlfriend." Monique smirked and sipped her own drink, a virgin daiquiri.
It was embarrassingly true. They'd seen more than one couple, and even trio engaged in more than just dancing this evening. It made Kim a bit uncomfortable, and Ron too, though he was handling it better. Clubs just weren't the redhead's scene to begin with.
The whole evening was just putting her weird-o-meter to about eight. First, of course, she was immediately recognized, and quietly told that she didn't need to worry about wearing the bright purple "under 21" bracelets that everyone else who was under age. The same went for Ron when they saw past his slick clothes to the goofey blonde who was always on TV with her; and Monique as she was in their company. Shego was obviously over age, so it wasn't an issue with her.
Kim still didn't drink, even though she was apparently allowed. Ron had tried one beer with Shego, but decided he too would stick to cokes. Then, of course, there was all the heavy petting going on in the shadows, and other oddities. Even the most nebbish scientists she knew from her dad's work at the Space Center were here and cutting loose, it seemed.
"Well, they've got a lot of stress to work off there, mocha bean." Shego broke Kim from her inventory of weirdness when she spoke up. "Blowed up city, alien invasion, Drakken's karaoke revival?"
The redhead rolled her eyes softly at the memory of that. "Well, I wasn't going to say anything, but Ron and I had fun. At least till he started ranting and singing."
"You would!" Shego made a playfully sour face as she nipped at her beer a bit more gently, "Live to make me miserable, don't you Pumpkin?"
"So… um… Monique… I didn't know that…" Ron was trying to form a polite sentence, but his mind was still blown.
"Know that what? I could dance?" The glistening girl fanned herself once more and chuckled.
"No, that you were… ah… you know…?"
Arching a dark brow, Monique seemed a bit confused by Ron's beyond normal fluster.
"Ah, I think he means the dancing, Mo." Kim chuckled, despite a hint of nervousness in her voice. "With Shego that is."
"Jealous, Stoppable?" Shego smirked wryly, "Don't be, she doesn't swing my way any more than Kimmie does."
"I'm Bar-sexual, Ron…" Monique giggled a bit, "We really need to get you a subscription to Urban Dictionary."
"Bar what now?" The blond boy scratched the top of his head confusedly.
"It means, Doofus, that she only dances with girls to get guy's attention. Hell, she's more like bar-curious than bar-sexual," Shego laughed softly, finishing her beer and calling for another, "I couldn't even get one little kiss out of her."
"Bar Curious?" Monique laughed, "I'll have to remember that one... 2G2BT, Girl!"
"Oh no… not 'nique speak!" Ron whined softly and drowned his sorrows in his coke. "KP, save me!"
"What about you, Shego, are you merely 'bar-curious'?" Kim made a set of air quotes to accompany her statement, but despite the gesture, her words held an air of curiosity.
"Why Princess, are you looking to jump ship?" she shot Ron a loaded glance and smirked, "I'm all about equal opportunity. If you'd like to learn more…"
As she expected, the taunt earned a blush and glance away from Kim. Shego smirked in triumph.
"I kid, I kid… Yes Kitten, for your information, I'm bisexual. Or omni-romantic, or polysensual, or whatever label polite society is using this week." She snorted and waved her hand just a bit dismissively.
Despite her slight discomfort over Shego's obvious irritation, Kim smiled. Just like the woman she'd fought with for years to be irreverent. "Well, I'll just stick to calling you Shego. Seems like label enough for yo-,"
A bright flash and loud bang interrupted Kim and knocked her against the table. She managed to turn after a moment to see the source of the explosion. The side door of the club had been blown in and lay on the floor. Billowing out of the portal were plumes of multi-colored smoke; red, yellow, green, purple… Beams of light also lanced through and music began playing.
Kim groaned as she heard a familiar, annoying voice echo over the din and looked to her companions, "So much for vacation."
"Oooooh!! That was FREA—KY!!"
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AN: Apologies for the slowness of the update… explanation of sorts on my main page… Please review.