Authors note: Thanks for reading only one more after this. I'm my own beta, the mistakes are all mine, though I don't have M Word any more so here may be a lot! but constructive criticisms are always welcome.

Disclaimer: I own nothing but my own mistakes.

XXXXXXX SPOILERS FOR 4X07 XXXXX

The dark Jane of Blinking Red Light worked for me, so I adapted his behaviour in the episode to my story. Please do not read if you have not seen it!

Though what I've written of the next Ch. so far, you can prob read the next chapter not having missed much plot. Ill say if it changes.

I wish he meant it when he kissed me cause then I could look back and see someone who loved me but I can only go back and see someone who used me.

Anon

She shouldn't be here, standing in a cul de sac outside a pretty two storey, helping the team catch Johnston. Her mind was not where it should be, instead it was where it had been since Panzer had been murdered. She should have stayed at the office, done paperwork, focused on anything else so she could push away the dark thoughts that had overtaken her mind.

She had plenty of reasons to be elsewhere, she had been meaning to go back to the doctor about her side, maybe take a vacation, spend time with her brother while he was here.

Jane said he would catch Johnston, after that she would go, well maybe after the paperwork was done. He would end this case once and for all and that had to mean something, right?

The trail had gone cold for a while with Johnston, and then yet another case involving young girls had been dropped on the CBI's lap. Sure all the previous cases had had struck a cord with Jane, left them both emotionally drained, but James Panzer and the SJ killer case had led to Jane crossing a line to a place that was perhaps beyond help.

Yes the murdered girl was older but Jane saw a father in despair and that was all it took. This case was his case, a broken man, a young daughter and a serial killer. It started slowly, so much so that she had not seen it at first, his transformation; that black pit inside the man she cared for that kept pulling him down, deeper and deeper. The darkness had spread within him twisting him into something acheronian and cruel.

She thought back to the many horror films she had watched on late night TV. She liked them all once but now she could only enjoy ones where the evil came from a supernatural source. Something less tangible, not reasonable but with a deeper meaning. Something spiritually nefarious rather than people who just liked to hurt people.

Lisbon caressed her cross, her link to the greatest force of good she had ever know. It was nicer to believe that if there was something controlling the bad from below, there therefore must be an equal force of good protecting from above.

Her mind wandered to those films where the hero or heroine would approach a loved one that was facing away from them and the person would turn, their face a distortion of human and demon, trying to escape their earthly vessel, too malevolent to maintain their disguise.

As her time as a cop had passed, Lisbon had realised that true evil does not leap out and reveal itself. Neither it is so obvious to the eye, instead it trickles out in actions, in who we are, and who we let ourselves become. Compromise after compromise and eventually there is nothing left.

Jane would put an evil man behind bars, she knew this. A bad man would be gone, girls would be saved but at what cost to him, to her? Lisbon stood outside Johnston's back door, at the location of another suburban nightmare.

She watched for movement in the two storey house. She looked past its perfectly manicured lawns, the white picket fence and its welcoming butter cream walls, she saw right through to the perversions hidden within. The house was much like Jane, she mused, a beautiful facade hiding a surprisingly dark cruelty just below the surface.

She had believed Jane's mask, seen his angel face, cherub curls and enchanting smile, but failed to see his black hellion heart. Lately things were changing, she regarded him differently ever since that night in her kitchen. She had been plagued by her brothers words in every moment since their confrontation.

Jay just looked at her now with a look, she hated that expression, resignation, sadness, combined with slowly diminishing hope. Oh how she knew that look, she used to see it in the mirror after dealing with her father on one of his benders.

She had thought Jane could be saved, that he was a good person but she was quickly realising that she was pining her hopes onto a man that neither wanted nor deserved them. When he had told her Red John was alive she hadn't believed him, she had thought he was taking him time to adjust.

Lisbon had held steadfast to the hope that despite how broken this man was, his messed up step towards intimacy, was a chance that he was working towards getting back into society. Perhaps his newly discovered need for comfort was the start of a reintegration to real life, born from his inability to focus himself on Red John. Turns out all it was, was just the need for a good fuck. She had always given people too much credit.

Reality had slapped her to her senses a few nights ago. When he arrived at James Panzer's murder scene something had felt off with Jane's behaviour.

Initially she had been relieved when she got the call, Panzer could not hurt any teenage girls any more but on seeing the smiley face she had truly been in a daze. She had dreaded telling Jane.

She had braced herself for his emotional devastation at this new development. She was better at reading him these days but all she had seen was his feigned surprise at the murder victim, his pretend shocked reaction at the smiley face and the barely concealed smug expression.

Considering this murder was the reappearance of his mortal enemy, Jane had seemed neither astonished nor inconsolable, instead it seemed more like he had taken pleasure in Panzer's fate.

Her stomach had knotted, her brain screaming denials but she knew then what he had done. Lisbon dreaded going home to watch the interview she had been told he had done. As the moments ticked by on screen, second by second she saw his plan unfurling, the spider catching his fly. She hoped and prayed she was wrong, but he played Panzer, goading him into action.

Patrick Jane the smartest man in the room, the king manipulator bows to no man, she knew how his mind worked. The FBI wasn't going to trump him in his game, he had failed once on this case but he was not going to be beaten.

The new head of the CBI wouldn't tell him what he couldn't do and some little pervert, second rate serial killer was not going to trump him and God help her she had aided his every move.

Lisbon had told herself as the interview went on that perhaps he was doing it for the victims, that maybe he was motivated by good intentions. Her last vestibule of hope disappeared when he looked towards the camera, at her, at millions of viewers but connected solely with one man, Red John, and as clearly as if he had actually spoke dropped the gauntlet.

He eyed the lens, communicating that he knew he was alive, letting the serial killer know that there was no point pretending, challenging him to kill the weasel next to him. Lisbon didn't know as much as Jane, but she certainly knew asking the man that killed your family to do your dirty work was more twisted than any mind should be able to conceive.

Due process; the local P D's and the FBI, they would have followed the leads, they were smart, organised and meticulous, they would no doubt have solved the case. She truly believe that the serious crimes unit was not the only agency in the world capable of stopping him.

It was not about the victims to Jane, it was about winning and revenge at any cost and to any one. The longer they worked together, the less she was seeing the division between acceptable behaviour and vigilantism also. Catching bad guys was not enough, she knew that now, it had to be done properly.

She had once thought that when Jane touched her that his fingers gave her warmth, she had not realised that they were not flames of passion but the fires of hell, burning into her, blackening her soul.

She had to turn her mind back to the task at hand. The team had crept to their positions, she could see the black shadows approach the house. She had opted to remain as back up, Cho had again thrown her a worried glance, barely discernible on his face, his expression had only slightly contorted. She had seen it though and so the team must have too. She would have to speak to him about undermining her.

Despite his misgivings, it was merely precautionary, her side was still delicate, a little red, nothing to worry about and they should be happy she was taking care of herself. Her gun raised, Lisbon trained her aim towards the back exit. The calm of the afternoon was soon destroyed by raised calls of CBI and stop.

She heard a heavy thud to her left and saw a movement in her periphery vision. The bastard had dropped from the upstairs window into a bush. She spun as he lifted himself from the ground.

"Freeze, CBI" she yelled.

"SHIT" Johnston was pissed that he hadn't seen her "Sorry pretty lady, I aint going to jail."

"Don't move... I'll shoot" Lisbon knew a runner when she saw one.

Johnston threw the bag in his hand a her, momentarily distracting her and bolted. She called to the others that he was running and took off after him. They pounded the pavement, shoes slapping on warm asphalt, Lisbon felt the heat of the sun burning her skin, she felt on fire.

Lisbon quickly gained on him catapulting her body into his dragging him to the ground. As her side collided with his, she had felt her body scream in protest, a sudden burning heat and pain engulfed her and right before she passed out she tried to figure out what the hell had just happened.