Hey guys!

I am telling you I am struggling with every word I write. I dont know why. I guess it is really a block that is hovering around the corner. BUT I finished the chapter and hope it is not too horrible.

I know I left you hanging with the last chapter's cliffy but to your immense relieve(I hope) Lizzie is still ok;)

Let's see for how long?:)

Disclaimer: Blacklist is not mine (for details, see Prologue.)

The Influence

Lizzie followed Dr. Flemming and after the next corner frowned at his back.
"We are not going to our usual room?" she asked, trying to catch up with him.

"Not this time. I have the feeling that Mr. Reddington is distracting you. If you want to learn to profile right, you will have to be able to remember as many faces as possible and that requires high level of concetration."

The frown deepened.

"Why? What does that have anything to do with profiling? I mean, I understand to study the mimic and the details on the faces but remembering faces?"

Dr. Flemming finally stopped at a metal door and opened it with a groan. Slowly it revealed a large room, with a huge screen on the wall.

"Wow…." Escaped her and she followed the man inside.

No lights went on, except for a white display right beside the door. Dr. Flemming positioned himself in front of it and gestured to her to walk further into the center of the room.

"Please take a seat on the chair."

Liz had to squint to see the single black chair a few feet in front of her, but finally she walked to it and sat down, noticing from the corner of her eye an assistant walking into the room and whispering something to the Dr. It was uncomfortable. The chair felt like hard wood and she was sure her back would give her hell about it tomorrow and the situation was even more uncomfortable. Used to the feeling of Red watching over her, she felt alone and unprotected now.

Suddenly a white light appeared in front of her, blinding her and forcing her eyes to squeeze shut. When she dared to open them again, there was a man's face on white background on the screen. The picture had just the right size for her eyes not having to scan over it but taking it in, in just one glance.

"I will have to excuse myself for the time being, Miss Keen. I have another student I have to take care of. My assisted Fred, I believe you have met him before, will explain to you what you have to do."

Liz turned in the chair and watched Dr. Flemming walk out and Fred moving nearer to her.

"Hello, Miss Keen." He greeted her politely and smiled. His brown eyes seemed friendly and Liz was amazed by the amount of curly hair he had on his hair. He was at least around forty but his eyes looked like from a young god.

His tall, lanky body came to a halt beside her and he pointed at the big screen.

"There will be faces flashing on the screen. I think there are around 200 people you will have to memorize as good as possible."

"How detailed do I have to remember them?"

"You will find out when you get the questions in the end." Fred smiled apologetically at her. "Dr. Flemming told me to say that, but believe me, it will not be a problem for you."

Liz raised her brows at him and the moment he turned around, she allowed herself another roll with the eyes. Those cryptic answers of Dr. Flemming were driving her nuts some times.

"I will close the door and leave you alone to concentrate."

Before she could even think of something to say, she already heard the door shut and saw the picture being replaced by another…and another….and another.

After her initial bewilderment, her eyes and brain adjusted to the interval of three seconds and she stopped thinking. Just taking the faces in. She didn't even notice the intervals changing into two seconds and finally one.

When the pictures stopped, the door opened again and a visibly aggravated Dr. Flemming came in, handing her a stack of papers.

"There…answer those please and we will go from there."

And she did. A hundred pages and half an hour later, she opened the door and looked right and left into the corridor. Not seeing anyone she wandered back the same way she had walked in the other direction before and rounded a corner, bumping into Red and dropping at least the half of her papers.

"Damn…" she cursed and quickly crouched down to gather her elaborated work. Suddenly she stopped. Her gaze drifted upwards, finding Red's expensive shoes in front of her and his legs not moving. Why wasn't he helping her.
"What's wrong?" she asked, seeing his tense jaw and the vein pulsing at his temple.

"Where have you been?"

"Ehm…in a room….completing a test…What's going on?" she felt nervous now and a slight pressure on her temples made itself known.

"Dr. Flemming said it would be better if I would leave you alone when you take tests. No watching, no hovering…" Red growled.

"Ahh…you admit to hover." Although she was joking, the strain in her voice was noticeable and Red didn't wait to ask about it.

"Maybe I should ask YOU what is wrong."

"Just a headache."

"That's not what I mean. You should know better than just disappearing. You are aware of the fact that I am there and sitting in the observation room every lesson. Didn't it even cross your mind that I might be worried when you didn't come in? Maybe you should take a break." He suggested, hoping that for once she would listen to him.

"No, I'm fine. I just had to stare at this big screen with all those fast flashing faces…and of course I knew you were waiting. Dr. Flemming left the room earlier and I thought he would let you know where I was. I didn't want to interrupt the test."

"It was the same test this boy was doing I told you about? With the faces?"

"Yeah…but you said it was a common test at the school, right."

Red only nodded. He wasn't a protégée but something was not right here.

Liz' eyes widened and she looked around before speaking in a low tone.

"You are not suspecting Dr. Flemming…."

"I haven't said that."

"But you thought it."

Red looked away. A sure giveaway that those thoughts indeed had crossed his mind.

"That's ridiculous, Red. You handpicked him. He was Manfred's best friend. He wouldn't DO those things." Since Red didn't want to say anything on that matter, Liz simply continued. "He might be a little bit strange from time to time and he can be a really tough teacher but, Red, you are not the impersonation of dull normality and sluggishness either."

"Whatever…" Red sighed. "I would prefer if you took a break for at least one or two weeks."

"What?" the calmness in her voice made Red shiver.

"Lizzie, it's not that I don't trust you to take care of yourself but why should we take the risk? And besides, you are still recovering and maybe it is a bit too much to expect from you to undergo training and therapy at the same time."

"No." still seemingly calm, Liz turned away from him on her heels and started walking away.

"Sweetheart…"

"NO." she whirled back around, an angry grimace on her face. "I will NOT let you rule my life! It MIGHT seem that I am a helpless damsel in distress sometimes and a while ago I kind of lost the ground under my feet but it doesn't mean that you can make decisions for me. And it does NOT mean that I can't handle this."

To Red's horror, he saw her eyes water slightly and her cheeks flush red.

"I don't want to…" he tried but he was too slow.

"I don't care right now. I have to concentrate on my next lesson."

"You do NOT walk away from me like that, Lizzie. We are not finished with this discussion."

The growl stopped her. Slowly she turned around, squinting at him.

"Why? Because it is not what you expect from me? Because it is not what you expect from a protégée?"

"Because I am worried…hell…why are you so stubborn? Its infuriating." his voice was high pitched and angry.

"Right."

Red watched her storm away and the only thing that was racing through his head was:

What the hell was that?

xxxxxxxxxx

"Where is Liz?" Dembe's surprised voice angered him and he wasn't even sure why.

"She is conducting tests, as she is supposed to."

"Don't you want to wait for her?"

Abruptly Red stopped, glowering at his friend.

"I am not her babysitter."

Dembe looked taken aback with this harsh answer.

"What happened?"

"Nothing. Everything is fine. Let's go."

Dembe hurried after Red, not understanding at all what could have changed between now and two hours ago

"Where to?"

"We are going to visit my old friend Jennings. He still hasn't paid his bill for the stroganov he'd stolen from me."

Dembe stopped at the driver's door and watched confused at the entrance of the building, hoping that Liz would come out any second and tell him it has been all a joke. Or at least tell him what was going on. But she didn't, so he opened the door, jumped in and fired up the car, driving silently to the destination Red had told him to go.

Three hours later…

Dembe glanced at his watch for the fourth time in the last half an hour. It was nearing four p.m. and they had only an hour left to drive back to the laboratory, pick up Liz and get her on time to her therapy session. But Red didn't make any notions at standing up and leaving. Finally, Dembe respectfully neared the two man, who were drinking some unknown beverage, and signaled Red to look at him. He did and politely asked what was on his mind.

"We need to pick up our charge."

Deliberately not mentioning Liz' name or her role in Red's life, Dembe saw Jennings interest peaking anyway.

"Who could that charge be?" he asked, smirking at Red.

"None of your business." He answered and turned his eyes back to Dembe.

"Please do me a favor and go do the job by yourself." He reached for a cherry, floating in his glass and popped it into his mouth. Chewing it slowly, he didn't look back at his friend. "I am busy and my presence is not needed. For a fact, the charge doesn't wish to have an escort."

Dembe was well aware that Red was using the situation to his advantage. In front of Jennings questioning his friend was not possible and he had to obey the order.

"Very well." He said dryly. "I will be back to pick you up in an hour."

"Don't hurry on my account, Dembe. I am in delightful company here." With a wave of his hand, Red gave his whole concentration to his drink and only heard Dembe walk away and close the door behind him.

"Now…" Jennings took a gulp from his glass before continuing. "Who is this charge?"

"A cat which drew out her claws." Red answered darkly.

xxxxxxxx

"Where's Red?" Liz asked when she got into the car.

"He had an urgent business to attend to.

"Ah…" Liz growled. "The business of avoiding me, huh?"

Dembe struggled with himself. The question was on the tip of his tongue, but should he ask her what happened or just let it be. It wasn't his business. While stopping at a red light, he glanced at his passenger through the review mirror. She looked tired. The make-up hadn't helped to cover the dark circles under her eyes and she looked troubled. It was a long time ago that he had seen her like that. The relationship with Red had not only helped Red but also Liz to come out of her shell a little bit. She was a good actress though and a person not knowing her would believe in an instant that Liz was a sunny and positive young woman which had no worries in the world.

"What happened?" he finally asked. To hell with politeness. He was living with them in one house. It WAS his business.

"We had a spat."

"A spat?" doubt crept into his voice and he twisted his head shortly to look at her.

"Alright…" she admitted defeat too fast for his liking.

"It was a bit of a hurricane. We just…I don't know. He was hovering and I just snapped. Or maybe my nerves snapped."

"He has always been hovering. Since the day you met him. What is the real reason you…snapped."

Liz sighed. She thought she was on the way to her therapy session, but re33ight now it seemed as if she was already in the middle of it. But he deserved an answer. He never was anything else but polite and nice to her.

"Dr. Flemming and I went to a different classroom, where Red couldn't watch me. Dr. Flemming said that he assumed that Red was distracting me. I didn't agree but also didn't deny. He left and I thought he would inform Red of my whereabouts but obviously he didn't and when I, by accident, met Red after the test, he was furious. I explained to him what had happened but he told me that he wanted me to take a break for at least two weeks. I didn't agree." Liz stopped to brush a hand over her cheek. She hadn't even noticed the single tear leaving her eye.

"I think he lost his patience. I was learning too slow. I haven't even come around to profiling yet."

Dembe stopped at another red light and turned back to stare at her.

"This is not possible, Liz. He thinks highly of you and believes in your abilities."

"Maybe he believed too much."

A loud honking made Dembe jump back fully into his seat and start driving again. He shook his head. This was never ever the reason. One night Red had confided in Dembe, that Liz had scored not only a higher IQ than he had expected but was also learning everything faster than he and the doctor had believed was possible. So for a fact, Dembe knew that this could never be the cause for Red's problem.

"Trust me Liz when I tell you that him being disappointed in you could never be an issue."

"Well…maybe he is not disappointed per se but obviously I am too difficult to live with." She sniffed and before Dembe could tell her how ridiculous this assumption was, Liz spoke again.

"I will walk the rest of the way, Dembe. Can you stop here?"

"That's not a good idea, Liz. It's only…"

"Yes…it's only a few blocks so I can also walk. I need some air."

To Liz' relief and Dembe's dismay, the car in front of them wanted to park and stopped the whole traffic.

"I will get a cab home so you don't need to fight your way through this traffic. Thanks for the lift, though."

With that, she opened the door, got out and shut it again.

"Damn it." Dembe swore under his nose and dialed Red's number on his cell phone.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The walk had done her good, Liz concluded when she reached the huge building in which her psychologist rented an office. She genuinely liked the woman. Not only because Red had told her about his own sessions with her, but because she was a gentle soul, which had an calming effect on her. Liz felt comfortable enough to tell her some personal things she never would have told anyone else, except maybe Red.

Liz swung her gaze between the stairs and the elevator and finally picked the stairs. Some exercise would calm her even further and the session could begin.

A minute after she knocked at the well-known door, it opened and a green eyed, middle-aged lady appeared behind it.

"Hello Elizabeth. So nice to see you. Come in."

This woman was also the only one who could call her Elizabeth without her wrinkling her nose in distaste.

"Hello, Dr. Davis. Nice to see you too."

The walked to the sofa and chairs in the middle of the room and sat down.

"Would you like some tea? You look a little bit nervous, dear."

Liz smiled, but shook her head.

"No tea, thank you. I actually don't feel so good."

"Why is that?"

"I had a fight with Red."

The words were simply flowing out of her. She hadn't known that she was even able to be that open with someone. Speaking without thinking was normally unthinkable for her. Red had pried open the can, so to speak, but Dr. Davis had ripped it open fully.

"I am sorry." The woman said, sitting down next to her on the chair. "Do you want to tell me what it was about?"

"Yeah. To be honest it was nothing big in the beginning, but then I panicked and one word lead to the other."

"Why did you panic?"

"I know we have already talked about this, but I got the impression that he…" she paused. Alone the thought hurt. "That he was bored or sick of me. That he lost interest because I was just not enough."

"Aaah…" Dr. Davis exclaimed knowingly. "My dear, you have to give yourself time. Your psyche has to heal. And as we already established before, those feelings of unworthiness are simply a product of your fear of being abandoned by people you love. It's only a fear and you are more than capable of conquering it."

While she was speaking, Liz watched and listened to her intently. Slowly she thought she knew why she was so comfortable with her. She talked and behaved like Red did around her. But why couldn't she be that open with him then?

"I know. I mean my brain knows it but when…when something happens…I don't even know what it is. It's always something different. Then I panic. Just like that. I can't think clear enough to see the situation for what it is. Harmless."

"I can't heal your soul, honey. I can only help to mend it."

"I guess that means that it will take time, right?"

"You are a very bright woman, darling." Dr. Davis laughed, but Liz felt a stabbing pain in her head and a thought penetrated her mind. Bright…hah…that's what you all want me to be.

"Are you alright?"

Momentarily, Liz felt disoriented. Were those her thoughts?

"Yeah…" she answered meekly and hoped that Dr. Davis wouldn't notice that she was feeling very strange.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"What do you mean you didn't stay with her?" Red's growl was quiet, but Dembe knew this tone and he didn't want to think of the situations that followed it.

"She told me she would be alright to walk the few blocks and when a car stopped in front of us and I had to slow down, she simply got out."

"Why, pray tell, didn't you SIMPLY follow and wait for her?" his eyes weren't narrowing. For anyone else he would have looked like calmness itself, but the boiling blood in him made his vein, once again, throb violently, and Dembe swallowed.

"I don't know. Maybe because I still heard your voice in my head, which told me that she didn't need an escort."

That was a hard blow for Red and It showed. The vein seemed to calm slightly. The still present alcohol in his blood was making his emotions go up and down like a roller-coaster and he was sure that in the near future he would be sick.
"You should have known better: SHE should have known better" The throbbing came back and now his hands balled into fists. Slowly he stepped right up to Dembe, his nose almost touching his. In a calm voice and eyes void of any emotion except anger, he demanded.

"You will move your behind THIS instant into your car, go out there and search for her. I don't care if it takes minutes, hours or days…I don't want to see your face anywhere near this house until you found her and if you dare to come here without her, I will personally make sure that you will never again want to undress in front of a lady. Did I make myself clear, Dembe."

"You made your point absolutely clear."

Both man spun around to the hallway, seeing Liz leaning against the wall and looking like hell. Dembe didn't think it was possible, but the vein on Red's temple began an even wilder rhythm.

"You." He spat, but refrained from yelling. Dembe swallowed and bit back a comment.

"Can you please be so polite and explain to me what this stunt was meant to accomplish?"

"What stunt are you talking about?"

Liz had gotten a cab and come home, intending to apologies to Red, explain what has been going on in her mind and then have a long, long make up session. But now her anger was rising again. What stunt did he mean? If he was so concerned for her, why didn't he accompany her to the therapy? Although she was aware of the fact that she had questioned him more than once why he insisted on sitting in the waiting room and waiting for her, for sometimes over two hours, she would have never thought that she would miss his calming and supporting presence after the session. Now she knew she did miss it.

"The stunt where you tell Dembe to let you out five blocks before your destination and as if that is not stupid enough, you also tell him not to come back for you."

"So now you've degraded me from brilliant to stupid in only a couple of hours. That's great. Why? Because I didn't do what you wanted? Or what you expected?" again the same accusation was voiced and Red felt his stomach turn.

"That is completely ridiculous, Lizzie, and you full well know it. It is dangerous and I haven't thought you would take risks like that so lightly. Especially after the last adventure we've had."

A low laugh escaped her and she brushed a stray hair from her face. Her cheeks were flaring red with anger and her eyes were glazed over with fury. Red remembered the few moments before she had rammed the damn pen into his neck and he knew that right now she was just second away from doing it again. A fleeting glance over the room assured that there were no pens lying around and he relaxed slightly. He sighed.

"Ok. Let's just say that it wont happen again and I am alright with it."

"What?" incredulously she stared at him. "I am NOT your prisoner, Red!"

"I have never seen you having to behave like one, Lizzie."

"Maybe I was too stupid not to see it."

She turned around and walked briskly up the stairs.

"I will sleep in the office." She called down and a second later the door boomed shut.

The moment she leant her back against the door, she grabbed her head with both hands and winced in pain. The jabbing inside her head was coming in waves but it was getting worse. The white flashes in front of her eyes were blinding her and her pulse was racing.

After only ten seconds, the agony suddenly stopped. The pain vanished gradually and the flashes stopped. Liz breathed in deeply and wiped the fine sheen of sweat off her forehead. Her pulse was slowly calming too but she felt as if something had changed. She just couldn't put her finger on it.

tbc...

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