Joker couldn't fall back asleep, his dream kept him awake. The screams of his mother shot through his imagination, loud and short bursts of horror hitting the sides of his mind. Rattling his soul every time he would hear himself laugh and shoot his mother…every night…every time he slept. But something new had come to him, this time Harley was there in his reoccurring nightmare. Relaxed and well mannered, arms graciously opened wide for him to take and be embraced with. She would always be there for him, always make things right. And he would be there for her, always making sure she was safe and unharmed. He listened to her breathe, so quiet and simple. Harley was the perfect match for him, in ways he couldn't actually describe. But she was so perfect, even his dreams knew that, every part of his body knew that Harley was the only one in the world that could possibly understand his life.

He sighed and sat himself upright, "Are you awake?" He hoped desperately that he didn't wake her perfect mind up.

A small voice answered, "Yea."

They had both been lying down for what seemed like hours, but in actuality was only twenty minutes. Joker looked over to his side of the bed, which was on the left, and noticed the time. It was three in the morning, and considering they had both gone to bed at about five the day before, he agreed with his internal clock that it was time to wake up.

"Are you still tired?" A groggy tone was present and with that grogginess a hint of death resided nervously close.

"Not really." Harley now sat up too.

She hadn't been able to fall asleep due to the fact that Joker now had a secret enclosed within his large and unending mind, and Harley forbid herself from coming in contact with that very secret. Was she pregnant or not was the only thing running through her scattered thoughts at the moment. The possibility of being the mother of The Jokers child…the mother of The Jokers child…was something that was terrifyingly splendid and unique.

"Well," Joker started, "let's get up and have some coffee!"

Harley shot her direction towards him, "No way do I want to see you with coffee in your system."

"It's actually quite funny." He placed his hand down on hers, which was delicately placed next to her wrapped up body.

"I don't want to be around you even if you breathe the aroma of coffee."

"Hey, you don't want to be around me, the funniest guy in all the land, the most notorious villain, the coolest of the cool, your very own Joker? I'm like…the most awesomest person ever."

Harley sighed and leaned into him, "The most awesomest?"

"Yea!"

Harley squeezed his hand lovingly, "Yea, I don't want to be around you when you have coffee…"

Joker only laughed.

"All I can think about is if I'm pregnant or not!" Harley jumped out of bed suddenly and walked swiftly to the bathroom to brush her teeth and comb her hair.

"I can tell you if you want." Joker called out to her.

He wanted to tell her just so she would stop bothering him. He had only known for thirty minutes, and she was already ranting on and on about wanting to know or not.

"Mmmm…I don't know!" Harley stomped her feet lightly on the bathroom floor while she brushed her teeth.

Joker pushed his head back on the wall and rolled his eyes. A dark smile present on his face. Maybe this could be a means for some fun…

He stood up and stretched, cracking his back in the act, and went to also prepare for the day.

Harley spit out the toothpaste and then rinsed her mouth with water. When she was finished she advertised her clean teeth towards Joker.

"Very nice." He shook his head in approval and brushed his own teeth.

Harley stared at him, "I want to know!"

He continued brushing while looking at Harley through the mirror. She waited impatiently, biting her lower lip and tapping her fingers on the counter top.

He spit and rinsed just like Harley, and then turned towards her; supporting himself up, with his arm conveniently placed on the counter.

"You sure?"

She pushed the corner of her mouth down contemplating, "Eh, no, no…I mean…"

"Do you want to know or not?" He waited patiently unlike her.

Harley clenched her teeth and breathed in slowly, creating a hissing sound as a result.

"Think about it then…" Joker went back to the bed, and to Harleys surprise he started jumping up and down on it.

"Hey!" She ran over to him, "Stop jumping on the bed!"

"It's my bed!" He smiled darkly.

She dug for a comeback but alas could not, "Be careful then."

"I wonder…when Gordon…is going…to call!" He remarked while trying to reach the top of the ceiling.

"Does it matter?"

"Yes! Without…him…the joke…can't…proceed!"

"Oh…" Harley sat down on the side of the bed, her body moving with the jumps of the Joker.

He stopped after a few more bounces and playfully crawled up to her side, "What do you want the answer to be Harl?"

"Yes because I want to have a child with you, and no because I don't want them to get hurt."

"Harley if you do happen to be pregnant, I would watch out for you both. I'd do everything in my power to keep my family safe."

"I know you would." She fell backwards on the bed, "Aren't I supposed to be the one giving you the news?"

Joker smiled, "Now that I think about it yes. I'm playing as doctor! And here I thought you were my doctor…"

"Technically I still am, have I made a breakthrough yet?"

Joker fell backwards as well, "Yes I think so."

"Well, that's good to know. I mean, I've broken most of the codes of being a physiatrist; at least I did one thing right." She laughed now, "I've kissed my patient, lived with my patient, had…sex with my patient, am getting married to my patient, and I might be pregnant with my patient's kid…oopsy!"

"That's a pretty big oops you got going."

She was in awe as Joker bit into her neck, "Who cares about all that now, you got me…" He ran his hand along the inside of her thigh, "I make all the troubles go away…"

Harley's body instantly relaxed as she felt Joker slice the back of her neck with a knife he pulled out of his pocket. It wasn't a deep cut or long cut, just a simple one that amazingly calmed her…and aroused her.

Joker pressed his finger hard against the new cut as he bit Harley's ear lobe, "You smell wonderful sweetie…"

Harley lapped at his words and somehow they did make all the troubles go away…every time he spoke, he made those horrible moments seem to fly out the window. He could just…change the matter of the conversation in an instant. Harley didn't seem to mind that Joker had these powers, but it was concerning to her that she was becoming aroused about being cut…or maybe it wasn't. The man she loved so much was doing it…could it possibly be that bad?

"I think it would be good for my health, if you told me if I was pregnant or not." She flipped over onto her stomach, "I feel so nervous."

Joker rolled over into her side and kissed her, "You're too adorable Harley."

Harley smiled and dropped her head down onto the bed looking at Jokers purple eyes, "Were a pretty complex couple."

"Yes we are."

"I mean, think about all the stories people will write about us, the television shows, cartoons even!"

Joker shook his head, "Fame seeker are we? Is that all you see me for?"

"No…" She slapped his arm playfully, "I was just thinking."

"I know you were." He licked the back of her neck and then fell back beside her, "I love the way you taste, it's so sweet Harley, and you're so sweet…"

She smiled thoughtfully as Joker rubbed her back, "Okay seriously I want to know."

"Really this time?"

She sighed, "Yes."

"…Positive?" He raised his eyebrows incredibly high, a questioning smile that had an eerie trance to it.

"Yes!"

"You really want to know if you are pregnant?" He cocked his head to the side. It was so fun to toy with her beautiful mind, and that was no understatement, it was quite beautiful.

Harley grabbed his shoulders tightly, "Yes Joker!"

"…I don't know."

Her eyes got bright, "Tell me!"

"I don't really see what the huge deal is anyways. I mean all we have to do is have sex again, which, in all honesty, I don't mind committing that with you, Harley, at all. I just take one minor glance towards you and I get this sudden arousal that just shoots through me from head to toe..." He reached back to her cut with his finger and wiped up the new blood that had seeped out, still as sweet as ever.

Harley's heart dropped, "You mean we aren't?"

"I never said that."

"Then we are pregnant?"

He licked the corner of his lips, "I never said that either."

"Joker!" Her eyes almost seemed red and angry…almost. She did love the way he played with her after all.

"Okay! Okay…" He stood up and popped his neck then knelt down casually on the side of the bed. Harley instantly sat near the edge where Joker was.

He wrapped his arms around her waist, "You sure you want to know?"

"Yes!" She screamed this time with her hands clenched into fists as if she was going to punch him.

"Woah…okay easy." He eyed her darkly.

Joker removed one arm from around Harley's waist and lifted up her shirt, he spoke soft and slow.

"Hush little baby don't say a word…daddy's gonna buy you a mocking bird.

And if that mocking bird won't sing….daddy's gonna buy you a diamond ring."

Harley instantly started to cry and she placed her head on top of Jokers as he sang quietly into Harley's stomach, his forehead pressed firmly against her warm skin. To her amazement, Joker cried too. Not a stress cry, an actual cry of happiness, and Harley could feel the few tears he produced travel along her flesh.

Harley reached down to Jokers face grabbing his cheeks carefully and turning his wet face up to her. She cried as she smiled into his eyes, laughing from joy as she did.

You're going to make a great father, even if you don't know it.

He smiled back and then returned his view to her stomach, kissing it softly.

Joker had a hard time concealing his emotions; he was glad that Harley had finally wanted to know. The whole time he kissed and caressed Harley's stomach, he heard his dream again. This time not his mother crying for help, crying of pain, crying for defeat, it was Harley telling him it was okay. He didn't hear the gun shots…hear his father scream his name…it was Harley laughing and caressing him, 'it's okay now'…Things were so different, he felt emotions flying through him, and for once…once in his life…he didn't mind them. He wasn't angry that Harley had caused all this, deep down…he was thankful, completely thankful.

I promise kiddo, I will never let you down, I will never give up on you…I will never leave you...You will never experience the things mom and I have had to go through…not in a million years…Oh believe me, it will be tough in our lifestyle…but trust me…trust mom…we'll be there with you every step of the way…we…will never leave you…

The two rocked back and forth, held tightly by the other. Harley kissing and stroking Jokers hair as she listened to his soothing words.

"So hush little baby don't you cry…mommy loves you so much…and so do I…"