Author's Note: Ok, I do think I'll be staying in this part of DB for longer than I figured. I came into this with a simple concept and I keep thinking of ways I can cause ripples. I want to flesh it out more, so I'll definitely be here until at least the ending of the tournament. It'll probably progress around the same speed as the actual series. So if you own it or know it, you have a VERY general guideline as to what each chapter will consist of. You're stuck with me for the long-haul it looks like!

Disclaimer: I do not own any part of Akira Toriyama's work. I am just changing the key signature on a fellow (but far more talented) literary 'musician's piece.

Would You Like Tea With That Quest? (Chapter 3)

"This village looks abandoned." After three days of driving, or in Goku's case flying, they had reached the general location of the next Dragon Ball. A quaint little village that looked completely hospitable save the fact that no one seemed to live there.

"Is the Dragon Ball here?" Goku said, hovering on the Kinto'un.

"That's what it says, at least we won't have to deal with anyone."

"No, I can sense people are here."

"What are you talking about? This place is like a ghost town! Hello! Anyone here! See?"

"No, there are people here." Goku hopped off the magic cloud and walked up to one of the doors and started knocking. "I know you're in there, why don't you answer?" He attempted to open the door.

"Maybe it's locked."

"Oh yeah" Goku then punched a hole through the door and it opened with a figure charging him. I hope this works! With one deft downward swing, the silhouette smashed an ax on Goku's head. The ax, not his head crumbled into hundreds of pieces. Oh no, he's invincible!

"I-I-I'm sorry Lord Oolong, p-p-please forgive me! I'll give you anything, just spare my daughter!" The man went from murderous ax cleaver to groveling peasant immediately.

"Huh?" Goku and Bulma said together.

. . .

"So your town is being terrorized by a guy named Oolong who can transform?" Bulma said. The man had described what had been happening while his daughter was tending to Goku's injury.

"Yes, so you can see why I took action before I asked questions. I thought he had taken the form of a young boy. He's a fiend who's already kidnapped other girls from the village. He's supposed to come today and take my daughter. I was just trying to save her." As he said the last statement he looked at his daughter lovingly.

That old timer sure gave me a big boo-boo. Good thing his daughter is helping. Are daughter's boys or girls? Goku's curiosity got the best of him as he patted the little girl's crotch to confirm her gender. "Oh! So daughters are girls!" Exclaimed Goku, happy with the information gained.

I really need to sit this kid down and teach him everything he should know! He is embarrassing me! "No pat-pat!" Bulma said, blushing from the second-hand embarrassment. "Anyway," She continued in a huff, "We may be able to help. Have you ever seen one of these?" She brandished one of the dragon balls for everyone in the growing crowd of villagers to see.

"Oh, I have one of those 'cept mine has six stars in it!" an old woman finally piped up. Moving towards the front of the crowd to better talk.

"Good! No if we get rid of your little Oolong problem, will you give it too us?" Bulma said victoriously.

"I suppose, but how are you going to do th-" the old woman was interrupted by Goku giving her a 'pat-pat.'

"You're also a girl!" Goku said with delight.

I've had enough of this kid's behaviour! "Excuse us for a second. Where's the bathroom? I need to talk to him about his behaviour." Bulma said as she grabbed Goku's arm and led him to where the man had gestured. "You can't be patting people there! It's not proper! You should be able to tell the difference between male and female! At least ask me and don't do that if you have to!" Bulma hadn't noticed that during her soliloquy, Goku had taken it upon himself to use the bathroom. "Did you hear anything I just said?!"

"Huh, oh sorry, I had to pee." Goku said innocently.

"Oolong's coming!" The man said as he burst through the bathroom door.

"Ok, here's the plan, Goku will dress up like your daughter and Oolong will take Goku instead. We'll follow him back to his lair and free the other girls. Goku is strong, you've seen that." Bulma spewed the plan she had already cooked up, letting her intelligence shine.

"Where's my bride-to-be?!" Oolong came sauntering into town. He was in the form of a 9 foot demon. He had bright red skin and two horns sticking straight up out of his head. Looking out of place, he was wearing a tuxedo and holding a bouquet. "Ah! there she is!" Goku had hastily been put in extra clothes of the villager's daughter. He had his back turned to him and had been told the plan. "Is that all you're bringing to your new home?"

I don't see why I can't just beat him up. "uh-huh." replied Goku as he turned around and walked up to Oolong.

"Very well, off we are darling." Oolong took Goku's hand and the left the village. After walking several minutes, they go off the path. Almost immediately after they get off the path, Oolong can no longer keep up his transformation. With a poof he reverts to his original form, an anthropomorphic pig. "So darling this is what I actually look like, now that you've seen it, you're definitely stuck with me. Let's hope this one actually want to do 'stuff' with me. All the other ones do nothing. Walking just a bit more, they made it to a small clearing with a roughly made trail going off to one side.

I could totally take this pig on! Goku was having a hard time staying with the plan, but he did.

"Now then, I have a car hidden around here that will take us back to my place much faster than walking." Rummaging around, he uncovered a capsule and activated it. Getting in, they drove on the trail until they had reached Oolong's abode.

"If I had known they'd take a car, I'd have brought my capsules!" Bulma said as the rest of the villagers made it to the clearing. They had kept their distance to make sure they weren't seen and had seen the two go into the thicket. They hadn't seen them since though. "We'll just follow this trail!" Bulma was mad that there was going to be more walking.

They were in a lavish bedroom. Oolong had made a bee-line to it when they entered his house. He hadn't wanted to show 'her' the other girls yet in an effort to keep 'her' from getting spoiled. He had set Goku on the bed and paced for a while, trying to formulate a plan. Ok Oolong, how are we going to play this? She's probably still innocent so maybe I'll pretend it's a game. "Hey darling, since you'll be here forever, why don't I teach you a fun new game!"

"A new game!" Goku figured he was supposed to wait until Bulma showed up so why not play a game while he waits?

"Yeah, it's really fun and exciting!" This may actually work!

"Ok, how do you play it?"

"It's simple, the first part is you have to take my clothes off as fast as you can." Goku managed to do this before Oolong could even think . "Wow! you're fast!" Oolong was in the nude and was starting to get excited.

"You're a boy! Cool!" Goku said, noting the appendage.

Not to bright this one. Oh well, it may be to my Just thinking about the things he wanted to do started making him hard.

"You love me?"

"Huh?"

"Grampa once said that when your pee-pee gets hard, you love that person. I've never seen one do that, but I think that's what he meant. Sorry, but I don't love you back. My pee-pee isn't hard, see?" Goku took off his clothes in a flash to show Oolong.

Oolong dry-heaved. "I saw it!" Ew. Ew. Ew. I got hard thinking about a boy. What's wrong with you Oolong? Oolong quickly grabbed his clothes and started putting them back on.

Why's he freaking? I saw his without freaking out. I guess he's like grampa and doesn't love boys.

"Haha! We've found your lair Oolong!" Bulma exclaimed as she and the rest of the villagers burst through the front door.

Finally! I can beat him up! Goku quickly grabbed the Nyoibō and got ready for battle. Oolong was still tripping over himself trying to get his clothes on. "Get ready to fight Oolong!"

Ah forget the pants! I've gotta get out of here beforeI get caught! Oolong transformed into a bat and was about to fly through the window when Goku smashed the Nyoibō on his head. Sending Oolong crashing into the floor.

"What the!" Bulma was in the doorway. Having just witnessed a naked Goku smash a naked bat into the ground that quickly turned into a naked pig, she had more questions than answers.

~After Goku retells the story~

"What a perv!" Although that shape-shifting could come in handy. Even though Goku told the story, Bulma still picked up on what he was wanting to do. The villagers had found the kidnapped girls relaxing in a room title 'rec room.' Oolong had been tied up and was under surveillance.

"Here's the dragon ball I promised" The old woman said, handing a six-starred ball to Bulma.

"Oh, thanks! Only three more to go!"

"I can't believe we were scarred of a pig!" said another villager who had just walked into the room. "We were so frightened of his looks, we never thought to fight back. Thanks for all of the help."

"No problem, I think we'll take our leave after we get our stuff from the village. Goku, grab the perv, he's coming with us." Goku obliged the order and picked up Oolong.

"If you try anything funny, I'll hit you even harder than before."

After they got their equipment, they said their goodbyes and took off on the road once more.

End Note: That was a bit different than what actually happened! Also it's hard to refer to the Nyoibō in any other way than it's actual name without sounding dirty. Another thing, Oolong is a type of tea for those who don't know, that's why the title is such. Lastly, it's somewhat weird to have Goku toss around the word love so easily. It seems like a strong word to me, but not to him. Remember, review, follow, or favorite if you want to! See you next chapter!

~Fifer Terst~