Sorry it has taken a while to get this chapter up but I have gone back to school and not had been able to spend whole day writing. But here is chapter four, thanks to all the people who have reviewed chapter 3 and I hope you enjoy chapter 4. Any way I'll leave you to read now and please review after just so I know if you liked it.

Emylou x

Chapter 4-The Station

The doors opened without as much as a push or a pull, Alex just walked straight on threw in to a warm light reception area. Alex turned on her heels clearly she'd got the wrong place Fenchurch East would never look like this, clean, light, warm and welcoming. She didn't fit in here in her dirty soaked clothes and grime over her skin. Tears threatened to fall but Alex blinked them back before tackling the steps away from the place she thought would be her safe haven. The station was alive with busy PC's and officers coming and going. Alex stood at the bottom of the steps taking it all in, and if she were one to smoke this would be an apt time to light up but Alex's doesn't smoke. So that Marathon bar with do for now. Alex tore at the wrapper to reveal the smooth outer chocolate, so perfect it was almost mocking her so she chomped in to it with such force she bit her lip causing her to yelp, "Shit!" It throbbed violently and a small trickle of blood entered her mouth. She curled her lip out with the aid of her fingers, trying to stop it hurting but it was no use, it hurt and now it was swelling. She grimaced in pain and muttered, "A swollen lip the perfect accessory to add to the homeless look."

A young WPC came up behind Alex taking her by surprise as she was wrapped up in nursing her sore pulsating lip. The girl tapped her on the shoulder making Alex whip her head round. "Yes," Alex lisped over the cut lip. The WPC looked at Alex not judging her one single bit, her big blue eye looking straight at Alex but not really seeing. Those eyes so similar to the ones she missed making those threatened tears fall bringing sobs with them. Alex's shoulders shook heavily pulling a weight of worry with them.

The skipper put her arm round those shaking shoulders a guided Alex back into the building. "Come on let's get you inside." Alex didn't resist she could really do with a shoulder to cry on. She peered over at the girl you was taking her in, she had a kind face with soft features, peachy skin and such a pretty smile; she'd have to be careful working here.

Alex was sat on a hard plastic chair the edge digging in to her thigh, which just added to the list of aches she currently had. The WPC walked slowly towards her, her lips pressed tightly together in concentration. "Here you go," The girl offered Alex a cup of tea and some tissues. Alex took neither but crumbled into her arms fresh tears surfacing. The girl could feel how damp Alex's clothing was and wondered how long this sobbing woman had been outside for. The girl just wrapped her arms around Alex to comfort her as what else can you do when a crying woman collapses on you. "Hey, it's alright, your safe here." The WPC reassured.

Alex looked up her eyes puffy and her lips trembling, Alex's words quivered from her mouth, "could you show me to the bathrooms?" The marathon bar was churning in her stomach and she didn't want to spew it over this clean décor. The colour had completely drained from Alex's face, her skin as white as porcelain. The girl led Alex through several sets of double doors, past the last set of doors the décor was darker, greyer, colder and more familiar. The walls were nothing but bare concrete, the floor simple brown carpet tiles and the doors were battered Formica. She was led into the large space of the female's locker room, nothing had changed here greyed painted walls with red edging. Alex's rescuer sat on the bench observing her.

Alex's first port of call was the loo's and fast, she shot across the room to a cubical into which the marathon bar was returned but in not quite the same shape it went in. Her throat burned from the second upset of today and her tongue was well and truly rubbed up the wrong way. Alex sat new tears burning down her face. She sat on the filth covered lino floor with her head on her knees, Alex drew loud uneven breaths to disguise her sobs but quickly she was over run. In an attempt to stabilise her breathing and control her tears she glared at the opposite wall but her plan fell to pieces when a knock came at the door and tears rolled freely.

"Are you ok?" Came a kind, innocent voice. Alex slid herself up the wall her fingers trembling as they reached for the lock. Alex peered from the door at the worried girl.

Alex looked at her expressionless quickly taking in the girl's furrowed brow and smooth complexion. She hurried past just muttering, "Excuse me." She slipped past and headed for the sinks.

Alex stared herself straight in the mirror and studied her face as if it didn't belong to her in any way. She tucked her matted hair behind her ears and ran her fingers over her face. She filled the sink and slipped her coat off abandoning it on the bench, following that by peeling off her sodden jumper and tossing it to the side and then removed her painful boots leaving her socks inside. She stood up in front of that mirror and observed her cold pale skin pricked with goose bumps, her white vest now greyed and almost clear revealing her red silk bra, her jeans clung heavily and her face bared a slight bruise on one cheek and the rest of the damage was just make-up spread over her features. Alex dipped her hand in the warm water, so warm she wanted just to climb right into the sink. She swirled her hand around dreamily thinking of how pleasant it felt and remembering her last luxurious bath full of oils and bubbles. Her fingers left the warmth to find a cream bar of soap slightly distorted from prior use, she could feel the bubbles form as she rubbed the bar between her palms. Alex took her soapy hands to her cheek bones scrubbing away the grime from her pores, her delicate pale flesh showing underneath.

Alex looked back up at her face it was clean but she was drained, her eyes swollen, her nose red and runny and her cheeks were flushed from the warm water. Her eyes were sore and red, the lids heavy and weary, no wonder they hurt they had seen so much from and glimpse of heaven to the slums of London. Her limbs were getting heavy but her head light, her knees swaying and her ankles shaking. The girl who had taken Alex in led her to the bench and sat her down wrapping a clean fleecy blanket around her torso. Alex pulled it tighter over her shoulders and curled her knees up to her chest, resting her chin on them.

"Do you want to talk?" The girl broke the silence. Alex looked at her not moving her head as not to use any of her remaining energy. She bit her bottom lip considering how to possibly explain without the men in white coats coming for her, the whole time her eyes on her helper.

Alex drew in a weak but long breath, "My life is a mess," she gulped some acid back down; "I'm a mess." Alex lifted her head slightly tilting it in the girls' direction.

The girl twisted on the seat to face Alex, "I don't mean to pry but what happened?"

"Well that's a good question, but I'm not really sure myself." Alex smiled lightly, "Sorry, DI Alex Drake by the way." She couldn't tell this girl what had happened, but she may know where she could find a certain Gene Hunt. He could have even been in that very same building and the fiery red Quattro could just be sitting outside.

The girl smiled hopefully at Alex, "WPC Beth Houghton, Ma'am." Beth addressed Alex with the formal term that she had once so often heard. Shaz was the one most often to use it no matter how many times Alex told her that they were friends and she could call her Alex, she still persisted even outside of work. Oh how Alex missed those long nights in Luigi's. Chris being a div, Shaz giggling at him, Ray attempting to chat up some poor girl and Gene, Alex's drinking partner. The endless nights of flirting and drinking, that spark that was between them that held such promise all just pulled away.

"WPC Beth Houghton, I'm looking for DCI Hunt do you know where I could find him?" Alex prayed Beth would know she held her breath waiting for an answer. How great it would be to see him and have someone she trusted to talk to someone she knew, her constant. What was Alex without her constant, she was just merely a lost soul passing through. Alex watched Beth thinking almost able to hear the cogs whirring in her brain.

"I'm sorry I'm really new here, but you could check his department." Beth chewed her lip hoping she hadn't made herself sound dim. Alex smiled weakly at her in a "that's ok" type way like a parent would smile at a child when they've knocked over and broken something.

"Thanks, and thanks for looking after me." Alex smiled. She slipped on her damp boots, pulled on her soggy jumper and slung her sodden coat over her arm. As she walked towards the door she gave a small thanks and goodbye wave then slipped out of the door leaving the WPC sat on the bench all alone.

Standing alone once more outside of the bathrooms, her hair damp and her clothes soaked, Alex felt full of hope and nerves. She was ever so tempted to just turn back down the corridor and leave again, but no, Alex gave her coat a squeeze and told herself, "Good luck." She took a big long breath and took long confident steps toward CID, blood pulsing through her veins, her heart in her stomach and hope in her eyes. Those steps seemed to pass in slow motion as those doors grew closed to touch, her whole body buzzing with anticipation. Her steps seemed the loudest thing around everything else so quiet. Alex reached her fingers out to feel the cool metal plate embellishing the door, her finger rested waiting for the courage to build, her palms started to clam up against the tarnished steel. She took another deep breath and pushed against the heavy door, the smell of smoke escaped and lingered in her nostrils.