No escape

Summary: Morgana cannot escape being evil.

Evil.
That's what she is now. Morgana once the king's trusty ward and honourable companion would soon be know as Morgan Le Fey, the evil sorceress. Morgause was already expanding her power, teaching Morgana everything she had been denied in Camelot, from her dreams to the fire gold in her eyes. Both she and her half sister were loyal subjects to the darkness of magic along with Mordred, Morgana's son not in blood. He and she would soon be united again and would stay that way.

Yet, Morgana missed her old life. She missed Gwen, her loyal and compassionate friend. She missed Arthur, her brother, despite the things Morgause plants in her mind. She missed Gaius, despite the fact he always pushed her away when she needed him to tell her of her magic, he was always her guardian. She even missed Uther, his great care and almost fatherly ways of looking after her taking over the fact that he hunted down her kind like animals. And she missed Merlin.

Merlin. The person she should not be missing at all. He had poisoned her, the very person that understood her. He had kept the fact that his eyes also shone gold away from her, she had learnt from Morgause and Morgause's looking crystal when she hadn't believe Morgause herself. He had so many chances to help her when she was going through what he had, yet he didn't lift a finger.

...Actually that wasn't true. Morgana knew how difficult it would have been to be able to find a way to contact the druids. And he had kept his mouth shut when he knew that she had stolen the crystal, despite the fact that he would've probably wouldn't have been believed anyway. Morgana could deny it and deny it, yet she knew that Merlin was her friend. He cared for her and was grief stricken of the poisoning even before he did tip it into the waterskin. He had held her when she thought she was dying, desperately trying to tell her through actions rather than words, that he wouldn't have done it if he hadn't had the choice. Morgause could twist everything around and Morgana could repay the scene as she first saw it – Merlin murdering her – yet she knew it wasn't so.

Which was why, she would brutally attack her skin with her fist, bruising and clawing at it. She didn't want to be evil. She didn't want to live if it meant that when she saw her friends again, they would not be friends. Morgana hated the fact that now, despite Morgause around, she was truly alone. Morgause might have helped her understand that her vicious nightmares were visions of the future but she couldn't pushed away the fright of Arthur, Gwen, Uther, Gaius and Merlin getting hurt. Uther had let her into her home, even through sometimes she was very much a handful, and now he would be after her neck. Arthur would have to fight her, not a play fight, but a proper fight, one that he would have to win. Gwen would no longer be at her side, shushing her fears but watching from the sidelines, tears running down her face. Merlin would be trying to protect Arthur, meaning that he would have to battle her and even through she and Morgause eyes lit gold, showing their uniqueness in magic, Merlin's power was stronger.

"The decisions you make now will change the shape of everything that is to come," Morgause had murmured in her ear when they talked in the forest of Camelot, "Who side are you on Morgana? Are you with Uther? Or are you with me?"

No, she was not on the side of Uther, who she had to pretend to stay alive. Morgause had offered the one chance of freedom and Morgana had taken it, without knowing the consequences. She was now on the side of evil with no turning back. There is no escape.

It's finish! Okay, perhaps I only made Merlin seemed really suicidal but Arthur doesn't really bear down what Merlin does, Gwen is only lost in the seas of love and Morgana had chosen to be evil to live in freedom. Merlin does bear the grunt of everything so Destiny is the offical Angst shot. Down with destiny.

Merlin: But don't you want to be an author?
Emma (me): Well...ahem...that's not destiny.
Merlin: But you want it to be.
Emma: And the reason why I also love Arthur?
Arthur: Shut up, Merlin.
Emma: I rest my case.
Arthur: Why didn't you just say that to him?
Emma: I adore him too much.
Arthur: Even though you made him really suicidal?
Emma: And the reason why I love Merlin the most?
Merlin: *magic spell*
Arthur cannot speak.
Emma: I rest my case.
Merlin: Review. Right onto finishing the rest of your stories.
Emma: Awww but I have plot bunnies...
Arthur: Mmmf mmmf mmmmmmfmmmf
Emma: What's he saying?
Merlin: Get rid of them then.
Emma: But-
Arthur: MMF!
Emma: I guess that means now. See you in my other stories then.