Hey guys!
Thank you so much for reading my little story. I hope you've enjoyed it so far and are looking forward to what comes next. I promise it won't get boring. Have fun!
Chapter Four - Happy Birthday
Zoro settled for watching the cook working his magic in the kitchen. Cooking had never been particularly interesting for him but now he realised that his ignorance had not been justified. Honestly, he had never thought about how to cook a goose or potato dumplings but now that he saw it, he knew he wouldn't have the nerve to do it. There was so much to do and to pay attention to that he was glad he could just sit there and drink beer while Nami and Luffy told him about what they had been up to over the past two years, with focus on the infamous Pirate King series. There was so much freaked out shit going on in the series Zoro couldn't really follow the storyline. It was just so like Luffy to come up with such crazy ideas.
Just when Luffy was about to tell him how he had fought against his own shadow which had been stolen away by a wicked guy named Geeky Maria or something the doorbell rang. Zoro didn't bother opening, since the cook had already left the kitchen to do so and Luffy was nearing the showdown of his story. The guy obviously possessed a devil fruit power, just like Luffy who was made of rubber in the series, and was a member of the Mysterious Four. It highly reminded Zoro of the Shichibukai and Yonko - just in an odd way. They were facing off and Luffy barely managed to win against the giant monster possessed by his shadow. It was nice. Zoro just didn't get how he and the cook were supposed to take place in all of this. After all, the cast for the series had long been chosen. But that was something he would think about later.
"Chopper, happy birthday!" Sanji welcomed their special guest. "Hey, guys. Robin, my lovely evening star, it's so good to see you."
"Ohohoho, what a lovely Christmas tree," Brook stated entering the living room. "Good evening, Nami. Luffy," he greeted his friends, completely ignoring the fact that Zoro sat right next to them. Usopp, Chopper, Franky and Robin followed after him while the cook went back to the kitchen.
Zoro just watched, glad to see they all were doing fine and almost looking the same as ever. All of them had matured, just like himself. Even Luffy-there was something in his eyes Zoro had never seen there before and thus couldn't name it. But he was sure he would learn about it sooner or later.
Maybe it was because Luffy was already stuffing his mouth with cookies that prevented his friends from realising that something was odd in the picture. But there was one of them who would never miss Zoro's return. Chopper nearly fainted when he set eyes on Zoro, his eyes becoming big like saucers.
"Zoro!" he shouted happily and a threw himself into Zoro's arms barely a moment later, hugging him with a force he wouldn't have given the teen credit for.
"I'm back," Zoro said and noticed that it wasn't much smarter than the stupid 'hey' he had welcomed Luffy and Nami with earlier. "Happy Birthday, Chopper," he therefore added and gleaming eyes looked up at him.
"This is the best present ever!" Chopper stated and Zoro saw Sanji rolling his eyes with a smile on his lips as he said: "I wanted him to wear a nice ribbon around his neck but he refused."
Chopper started giggling. "That would have been awesome."
"That would have been weird!" Usopp butted in and patted Zoro's back in brotherly affection. "I knew you wouldn't leave Captain Usopp's crew without returning sooner or later and having a really good excuse for your absurdly long absence."
"Didn't they tell you?" Zoro asked as earnest as he could. He had missed the outrageous stories Usopp used to tell. Honestly, Mihawk hadn't been much of an entertainer. Not that Zoro needed entertainment, but he appreciated it. Usopp frowned at him tilting his head to the side.
"Tell me what?" he asked.
"That I was hit by a truck and in a coma."
Usopp gaped at him as well as Franky and Chopper. Robin started giggling and Nami joined her.
"Touché," Sanji stated, Schadenfreude written all over his face.
"You are lying!" Usopp finally yelled and everyone burst out laughing. "I thought your strange bushido rules forbade lying!"
"I'm not lying. Just challenging your intelligence."
"Says the moss-head," Sanji teased and placed a new bottle of beer in front of Zoro.
"Shut up. I wasn't talking to you," Zoro replied and looked at Usopp again. "So, how have you been?" He looked normal, more muscular but not really different.
"Fine. Just fine, but you look a little battered," Usopp stated and immediately added, "I, as the notorious Captain Usopp, would not have ended up in such a state. I…"
Zoro had heard enough and turned his attention to his other friends, taking in their appearances closer. Brook hadn't changed a bit. Well, he was huge, old and outrageously flamboyant in style. Some things just couldn't be topped and Brook's style was one of them.
"Zoro, seeing you is just super!" Franky shouted and Zoro was sure he would break down in tears of joy any minute. Franky had become even more of a hulk than he had already been. It wasn't easy to impress Zoro in built but Franky never failed-despite his odd way of dressing in Hawaiian shirts and swimming trunks. Why he hadn't been arrested for scandalising society so far was beyond Zoro.
"I agree," Brook finally said and sat down at the dining table after greeting everybody properly. "It's great to see you are fine."
"So, what did I miss? Or was life without me that boring?" Zoro asked and turned in his seat to face his friends, resting his elbows on the counter. Never would he have been able to foresee the impact his question had on them.
"Man, you should have been there!" Usopp burst out.
"Luffy was so super!" Franky joined him.
"You idiots, he was severely wounded!" Chopper lectured but was completely ignored. Zoro just didn't get what they were talking about.
"Why don't you guys start the story at the crucial point when Ace got imprisoned in Impel Down?" Sanji suggested and Zoro could only gape at him stupidly.
"Ace got what?" he gasped and a moment later he knew he should have kept his mouth shut. Everyone was trying to explain everything at once to him and he didn't understand a single word they were saying. All he understood was that he would be going deaf soon if they kept yelling in his ears like that.
When Luffy finally spoke up, his eyes sparkled with excitement and everyone else fell silent.
"Ace was caught by Blackbeard and handed over to the World Government. I went to Impel Down to save him."
"He tore apart half the prison causing a riot of the prisoners. God damn it, he freed the most dangerous people history has ever heard of! Including Sanji's boss Ivankov." Usopp butted in and he didn't really seem happy now.
"Ex-boss. I insist on that detail," Sanji butted in but was ignored by Usopp who happily babbled on. "Ace was then taken to the Marineford for execution and a freaking war broke out. Whitebeard was there, the entire Shichibukai, the Marines as well. Things got really ugly!"
"We freed Ace, that's all that counts for me," Luffy said and Zoro could only shake his head. This was just so like Luffy it didn't even surprise him.
"Sounds like you could use it for your Pirate King series," Zoro mused before he finally realised what they had just told him. "Are you telling me that you openly opposed the World Government, broke into the most high-end maximum security prison there is and actually succeeded? That's like a declaration of war." He was not surprised that Luffy had caused a huge commotion but to actually start a war was something you didn't do every day. It was exactly what he would have done. Zoro was proud to be friends with Luffy.
"You could say so," Luffy replied grinning at him.
"Then why aren't you imprisoned? I think starting a war qualifies for that."
"Shanks." Luffy's grin grew even wider.
"Shanks?" Zoro didn't get it. He knew Shanks. Shanks was one of the most precious friends Luffy had. He had been the one to give Luffy his straw-hat. Shanks was also the one who had promoted Zoro in Kendo and become his manager. But how did that fit together with a war and Luffy's impending imprisonment?
"He showed up at the Marineford and ended the war. He was amazing!" Luffy explained, his grin never leaving his face. "Oh, and he's an Emperor."
Zoro tried to piece the puzzle together. So Shanks was an emperor. Of which country? Was that something like being a king? And why would that matter?
His confusion was obvious to at least Robin.
"There are the World Government, the Shichibukai and the Yonko, the three powers to rule over the world, right?" she asked him and Zoro nodded. He wasn't an idiot. He knew how the world worked. "The Shichibukai are the Royal Seven Warlords, Mihawk being the most famous among them, and the Yonko are the Four Emperors. And Shanks is one of them."
"Which means he is one of the most notorious and most powerful gangsters there are, despite being a really nice guy. Well, that's big news," Zoro concluded and decided it was high time to get some booze to stomach all this.
"I'd like to propose a toast to Ace and Shanks," Brook stated and raised his cup of tea Zoro hadn't noticed before.
"You get your toast if I get booze. You can't toast on tea, you know?" Zoro replied and a moment later he found a cup of sake in his hand.
"Happy now?" Sanji asked and glared at him while filling shots for the others with their favourite liquors to hand them out for the toast. He sure was a great host.
"It's Christmas and Chopper's birthday. How could I not be?" Zoro stated, a smile spreading on his lips.
"Don't think saying that will make me happy, idiot!" Chopper ranted but his happy face said otherwise.
"You wanted to toast, Brook," Zoro said and cocked an eyebrow at Brook.
"Yes. Well, on Ace and Shanks. May they fare well in whatever's about to come," Brook said solemnly.
"And a toast on Zoro, may he never lose sight...," Usopp added.
"Don't you dare mock him!" Chopper interrupted him.
"Why would I mock him?" Usopp asked completely confused by Chopper's sudden outburst.
"He lost an eye, idiot!" Chopper ranted and Usopp finally realised what the teen was talking about and grumbled "So now that's my fault or what? What I wanted to say was that he may never lose sight of his home and friends again," before he downed his shot.
That was actually a rather nice toast, Zoro thought. Of course, he had not forgotten about his friends for a second while he had been away and smiling into his cup of sake he vowed to himself that he never would.
Sort of a toast-contest started and the more toasts they proposed, the drunker they got and the shittier their toasts became. They toasted on the mightiest animals in the world-Santa's reindeers; the quickest postman there was-Santa, delivering all the presents around the world in just one night; the invention of Christmas, the invention of birthday parties, and ultimately the invention of toasting itself. Zoro had never seen them getting hammered that quickly while they hadn't even had dinner yet. Maybe that was exactly the reason. It was a dreadful sight, really.
The only ones unaffected by the alcohol were him and Nami-and Nami was a witch. Never before had he encountered a woman who could drink booze like her. He had never met a guy who could as well, except for himself. Not even the cook who looked still sober enough to handle his cooking could compete to her because he had cheated and had skipped every other toast to get dinner ready. But still the cook wasn't as sober as he might have thought he was.
"So, you drunken morons," Sanji finally said and balanced their plates around the counter to serve dinner. Roasted goose with potato dumplings and red cabbage with apples. It smelled delicious. "Here's your dinner. If you don't eat up there won't be cake but rainy weather tomorrow."
As if it had ever happened before that there were leftovers. Zoro couldn't remember Luffy ever not eating everything he could get his hands on. Watching the cook balancing the last two plates, his own and Zoro's, over to the table he could tell that he the alcohol would hit him quite hard the moment he sat down. His superior manners were slipping and he even forgot to dote on the ladies. Zoro didn't know him that well but he was sure he would never have included the ladies to the general 'morons' at the table.
"Whew," Sanji breathed when he sat down next to Zoro and now he could see it in the blonde's eyes that he was already quite drunk. His body had practically moved on autopilot.
"Remind me to not let you involve me in toasting before dinner ever again," he said and took a deep breath before facing Zoro. "You look way too sober. Does moss have special enzymes or something to not be affected by alcohol?"
"I don't think so," Zoro replied not really keen on picking a fight with a drunk.
"But I've decided one thing," the cook added and a little grin spread on his lips. "The sober guy does the dishes."
"That's awfully far-sighted of you," Zoro replied not really bothered by the cook's decision. It was just a statement of what had always been the case. The sober ones did the dishes. It was the only reasonable thing to do if you didn't want to buy new dishes after a party.
"I'm a genius when it comes to seeing the big picture."
"Just shut up and eat, shit-cook."
"Don't insult my cooking!"
"I didn't. I was talking about you."
-X-
Right after dinner Zoro could hear the ringing of the cook's cell. He was really an important guy considering how many times he had been called today. Lighting up a cigarette Sanji got up from the table to take the call. After eating dinner his movements had become a little steadier again, Zoro noticed.
"What is it, geezer?" he snapped right after answering.
"The hell? Is that a way to speak to his elders?" the reply was yelled and it was loud enough to be easily heard by Zoro when Sanji sat down next to him again.
"I was brought up by rude bastards. I don't know another way of speaking," Sanji replied and puffed out a cloud of smoke.
"Don't gimme that shit! I wasted more than nine years listening to your nonsense trying to teach you at least basic rules of courtesy and some cooking skill so you could make a living. And what for? Everything you cook tastes like rotten garbage!"
"Why are you bothering me, old man?" Sanji asked and Zoro wasn't sure if he was aggressive due to the alcohol or if their relationship had always been this strange. But the next things the other man said were unusually quiet so Zoro couldn't hear them.
"Who told you stupid shit like that?" Sanji yelled and now everyone was staring at him more or less interested. "Show me the one to force me to do anything I don't want, old fart, we'll see if you succeed! No, I mean it! There is no way I… Whatever. Think whatever the hell you want."
"Don't whatever me! You ungrateful brat!" the other yelled again. "You'll be here tomorrow morning and explain everything properly!"
"Like hell, damn geezer!" Sanji yelled and hung up. He finally seemed to realise everyone was watching him. He smiled. "Zeff says Merry Christmas."
"That sure as hell didn't sound like Merry Christmas to me," Usopp stated and Zoro couldn't agree more.
"He just called to tell me to come over to the Baratie tomorrow," Sanji explained now fully grinning.
"I don't see that!" Usopp insisted, "That sounded more like 'Next time you show your face here you'll be dead'."
Luffy finally started laughing. "Sanji, I want to go there, too!"
"You still owe Zeff a new roof, don't you?" Sanji stated matter-of-factly and raised an eyebrow to emphasise his words.
Luffy pouted. "That's not the point. I want to eat his food!"
"Do as you please, Luffy. Oh, and Zoro - he wants you to come along, too," Sanji said with a mischievous smile on his lips. Zoro looked at him trying to figure out what he was trying to hint at.
"So?" he therefore asked.
"That's no fair! I want to come along!" Luffy ranted but was ignored.
"He mentioned that Ivankov visited him to tell him about my new situation and that involved mentioning that I was living with you, marimo head," Sanji explained lowering his voice. "He didn't spare him the details, if you know what I mean."
Zoro wasn't sure if he did but it didn't really make a difference, though, since he wouldn't go anywhere tomorrow. It was the first day of Christmas after all. Plus, if the cook had trouble with his dad it was his damn problem, Zoro decided. He had bothered with the blonde's matters enough for one day. There were more important things to… and then it hit him. The 'details' the cook was talking about must be the pictures of them kissing this morning and their kiss on the phone earlier. It was no wonder Zeff wanted to talk to him if Ivankov really had told him about that. Damn.
"I don't see me explaining that to your dad," he therefore stated.
Chopper tucked at Zoro's sleeve and looked up at him with big eyes. "What are you going to explain to Zeff?" he asked and Zoro frowned.
"I'm not going to explain anything, Chopper. It's the cook's damn problem to talk to his dad."
"You should help him, Zoro. That's what friends are for," Chopper insisted and Sanji couldn't suppress a soft snort. Judging by the amused look on his face he was really enjoying the situation.
"That's damn right. You have to help your friends, Zoro," Usopp agreed with Chopper causing Zoro to frown. Judging by Usopp's heavy lids he was still as drunk as he had been before dinner.
"Do you even know what we are talking about?"
"Sanji's job?" Usopp guessed and couldn't have been farther from the truth.
"What makes you think this is about his job, moron?" Nami asked disbelievingly.
"But he's working for Ivankov, isn't he?" Usopp asked scratching his head. "I want another beer. Sanji do we have more beer?"
"Like hell I am working for him!" Sanji burst out, "Our contract terminated at midnight and I don't want to hear his shitty name ever again!"
For Zoro the cook was making a drama for no reason-which was reason enough to inquire him about it.
"Oi, shit cook," Zoro spoke up to get the blonde's attention, "What were you doing at Ivankov's?"
"Didn't I tell you just now that I don't want to hear that name again?"
"Don't be a sissy and tell me what your job was."
Sanji looked at him with a confused frown. "I was working as a cook. What else would I work as? Are you stupid?"
"I was just wondering. Are you sure that's all there was?"
"No, that was not all there was," Sanji muttered before he burst out laughing. "It was so fucked up I don't even want to think about it."
"Iva-chan is a nice guy," Luffy butted in squeaking happily.
"He's the frigging queen of okamas!" Sanji burst out as if that fact was the worst thing he had ever come across. Maybe it was, but Zoro couldn't make sense of it.
"Okamas?" he therefore asked. Maybe Ivankov really was the queen of some small country he hadn't heard of so far?
Sanji sighed in disbelief and rubbed his face with his palms.
"Okama means…," he took a deep breath, " all of his subordinates are a little odd. And with odd I mean freaks. And with freaks I mean shitty perverts. Just like Tibany and Caroline."
That was all Sanji said before he rose to his feet and collected the dirty dishes to take them to the kitchen for wash-up.
Whatever had happened to the cook must have deeply agitated him to make him react as hostile as he did when it came to Ivankov. Not that Zoro cared but it was strange enough to spark his interest. If it bothered the cook so much to even think about it, it sure as hell held high potential to tease him about it. But he needed more information for that so he rose to his feet and followed him to the kitchen. Leaning against the door frame he watched Sanji prepare the hot soap-water to wash the dishes. It was interesting how mad he seemed even when Zoro couldn't see his face. His movements were swift and sharp, yet a little unfocused, just as if he were fighting drunken while trying to suppress his boiling anger. Maybe, if Zoro managed to push the right buttons, he could get the cook to snap and fight him.
"Tell me, cook, does it bother you that those okamas are cross-dressing?"
"No." Sanji replied taciturn without bothering to turn around.
"Is it because they are gay?"
"No."
"Because they are not pretty enough to suit your tastes?"
"No!"
"Did they feel you up?"
"What the hell? Why don't you leave me the fuck alone and bother your friends with your presence?"
Finally Sanji turned around and it was not just fury blazing in his eyes. He looked embarrassed and uncomfortable. Zoro smirked at him. It wouldn't take much more to get the cook to snap.
"Hit a sore spot, didn't I?" Zoro pushed further and all fighting spirit left the cook at once. Zoro wasn't sure if he had overdone it or what the hell just had happened.
"You just can't leave me alone, can you? If you insist on disturbing me, there's no helping it but at least be useful and dry the dishes, moss head."
"Will you tell me what I want to know?" Zoro asked and grabbed a tea towel to do as the cook wanted. Showing a little gratitude for tonight's dinner wouldn't kill him. Plus, he got the chance to bother the cook further.
"I don't think so but if you can offer me something worth talking about the worst time of my life I might consider it an option."
Zoro thought about it while drying the tableware.
"I don't think there is something I could tell you in exchange. I don't remember doing anything I hated."
"Maybe I can help you remember, swordsman-san," Robin offered and when Zoro turned to face her he knew exactly which incident she was talking about. The tell-tale smile on her lips was more than he needed to remember the only secret he shared with her. It was the most embarrassing moment of his life. It held nothing heroic, nothing honourable and not even a tiny bit of grace. Zoro clenched his teeth and felt his ears getting hot.
"No. That's a story I won't talk about and you promised to not talk about it either," he snapped but it was too late already. Luffy started questioning Robin about the memory they were talking about, Usopp started fantasizing about possible events that could have taken place and Brook was asking if it had something to do with panties. Zoro sighed.
"That's precisely why I won't talk about it. Do you understand that now?" Sanji asked in a low voice and Zoro looked at him.
"But I still want to know what happened," he insisted in an equally low voice and the corner of the cook's mouth turned upward.
"I'll tell you if you tell me your story first," Sanji whispered and waited for Zoro to react while washing the dishes as if nothing had happened.
"You can not tell anyone about it no matter what, got that?" Zoro growled in defeat.
"Same goes for you - if I find your story interesting enough to tell you mine."
"It's the most embarrassing episode of my life. I'm sure it's worth getting to hear your story," Zoro said putting down the towel and straightening his back. His head was starting to ache and he was sure this was the most stupid idea in his life but there was no way back now.
"Fine. If it really is worth laughing about I'm happy to share my ordeal," Sanji replied and dried his hands on the tea cloth Zoro had just put aside before he fumbled a cigarette from the pack and lit it.
"Alright. And hopefully your story is worth making a fool of me as well." Zoro took a deep breath and started telling his story in a low voice, "We went shopping in a town I can't recall the name of. Somehow we got separated and I ended up at an orphanage."
"I wonder what happened then," Sanji mused and a broad smile graced his lips.
"I somehow ended up feeding a baby and it peed on me but that wasn't the worst part. Heaven knows why but I found myself carrying three babies around with me while doing the shopping -after the lady in charge of the children had removed my dirtied shirt and forced me to wear a ridiculously tiny yellow shirt with an pink print stating 'mama'. Do I need to say more?"
Sanji just looked at him and blinked. Then his smile grew even wider before he burst out laughing.
"Tell me more. Please, it is just so awful. Hahaha!"
Zoro's face was burning with embarrassment but it was nice to see the cook laugh. Even if it was about him.
"Zoro, what happened?" Luffy asked and hopped on a barstool at the counter, curiously looking at Sanji. "Why is he laughing?"
"I talked to him and now he's laughing like an idiot."
"I want to laugh to. Tell me what you told him!"
"I'm sorry but it's a secret. I can't tell you."
"Bushido-san is right. If it's a secret he can't tell you, captain-san. But I'm sure if the time comes he'll tell all of us what's going on," Robin said and Zoro wasn't sure what she was talking about. It was nothing new for him to not get what she was talking about but this time it felt different. Almost as if she knew something he didn't-even though he was supposed to. It was creepy how she always seemed to know things no one else did.
"Alright," Luffy replied. "But I want to be the first to know when the time comes."
"Whatever you want, Luffy," Zoro said and nodded in Robins direction to show his gratitude. "Now get back to whatever you were doing and have fun. We'll be with you in a minute."
"I want to play hide and seek!" Chopper exclaimed and ran off to hide.
"Yay, hide and seek. Usopp has to look for us!" Luffy decided and ran upstairs to the dojo to hide.
Nami rolled her eyes and Zoro had to admit that it was the only possible reaction. Turning his attention back on Sanji he found the blonde watching him, a smirk was still gracing his lips.
"You are such a moron for wearing that stupid shirt. Even if a beautiful woman asked you to wear it."
"She was an old hag."
"All the more reason to decline. Still, I won't let you badmouth a lady ever again. Remember that," Sanji said still smiling but Zoro could very well see that he was serious about his statement.
"Shut up, cook. I'm not here to listen to your babbling about women. I'm here to hear your story."
Sanji just shook his head and picked up washing the dishes again. "Which one is it?" he finally asked. "Shall I shut up or tell you my story?"
"Tell me your damn story!" Zoro growled feeling the urge to strangle the blonde before him. Hopefully, he wouldn't have made a fool of himself for nothing.
"I think I need a drink when this is over," Sanji said and handed Zoro a plate to dry it. "Well, you know about Ivankov and his okamas. When I got there I didn't know shit and blinded by expectations that weren't justified I thought they were real women."
Zoro snorted but suppressed it as soon as he noticed that it hadn't been the punchline yet.
"As soon as I realised my mistake I started running but they caught me and insisted on keeping me around. So, to get Ivankov to teach me his cooking skill so I wouldn't be there for no reason at all, I had to play by his terms."
"And his terms were?"
"They made me wear make-up."
"Nice."
"I had to wear pink pumps, too."
"I'm sure it was horrible to watch you teetering around in them."
"And they stuffed me into an incredibly ugly, frilly, pink dress. With puffy sleeves."
Zoro tried to imagine it and could only shake his head. It was so uncool he couldn't even laugh about it.
"Why don't you say anything?" Sanji asked cautiously but didn't dare to look at Zoro. It was endearing to see him so embarrassedly touch his neck without even noticing that the foam from his hands was now sticking on his hair and collar.
"I don't know what to say. Weren't you the one to tell me to refuse wicked getups just now?"
Sanji started laughing again. "That's damn right. I do know what I'm talking about from first hand experience, after all."
-X -
It felt great to be able to laugh about the things that had bothered him for almost two years now. Being with Zoro took a weight of his shoulders of which he had thought he would have to carry alone for eternity. Never would he have expected it to be so easy to talk about what had happened at Ivankov's place. And what he had expected even less was that Zoro had actually told him about his ridiculous babysitter episode. It was hilarious and Sanji was grateful that the moss-headed moron seemed to trust him enough to share this experience with him. All he could hope for now was that Zoro would keep his word and not tell anyone about his inglorious days as an okama.
"Did you grow that wicked French beard of yours before or after having found out that you fancy dresses?" Zoro asked and cocked an eyebrow to emphasise his question.
"Afterwards, asshole. I need a drink now and the company of lovely ladies," he said and left Zoro behind in the kitchen to not have to look into his gleefully gleaming face anymore. So, thinking about it again, Sanji came to the conclusion that telling him about Ivankov had been a mistake.
He went to the dining room and sat down next to Nami and Robin who were smiling at him.
"You look troubled, cook-san," Robin stated tilting her head to the side.
"It's nothing your love for me can't cure, my beautiful butterfly. Seeing your and Nami-swan's lovely faces is enough to make me happy again."
"You mean you are crappy, shit cook," Zoro interrupted him and sat down opposite of his friends, two bottles of beer in his hands. One of them he placed in front of the cook.
"You forgot your drink," he muttered and took a sip from his bottle.
Sanji was about to say 'thank you' when Usopp, Chopper and Luffy burst through the door to the rooftop garden.
"Sanji, we want cake!" they exclaimed in unison.
"You can't bear the thought of giving me a minute of rest, right?" Sanji asked smiling and got up again to serve the cake. It always pleased him to serve his friends and they knew he wouldn't mind it. Plus, the cake was amazing and he simply had to watch their happy faces while devouring it.
He took the cake from the fridge, lit the candles he had put on top of it and placed it on the dining table so Chopper would be able to blow them out and make a wish.
"I hope you'll enjoy your cake, Chopper. Now make a wish," he said and stepped aside to make room for the kid.
Chopper stared at the cake in awe, his eyes glistening with pure joy. He took a deep breath and blew out all the candles in one go.
"What did you wish for?" Luffy asked and popped up right behind Chopper, most likely to make sure he would be the first to ensure his fair share of cake.
"You can't tell your wish or it won't come true!" Usopp butted in and for a moment Chopper seemed utterly shaken and on the verge of tears by his mishap of almost telling his wish.
"Listen, Chopper," Zoro suddenly said drawing all the attention, "If you don't tell you wishes they can't come true because no one knows about them. You could at least give us a chance to help you make your dreams come true, right?"
Chopper smiled his most adorable smile at Zoro before starting to wiggle in his place and insult his friends.
"Don't think your caring about my wishes makes me happy, moron. I won't tell you that I wished for all of us to always be together."
"If that ain't a super wish worth making a toast on I don't know what is," Franky said and raised his glass. His friends followed suit. "On Chopper," he said.
"On Chopper," the others said in unison and downed whatever drink they held in hand.
Unfortunately, Sanji felt it go straight to his head, causing him to feel even more drunk that he had before dinner. It was not like him to be affected by alcohol so much but today sure was an exceptional day in more than one respect.
"What's wrong cook? Are you drunk already?" Zoro asked and Sanji looked at him slightly confused. Was he drunk? He contemplated the question and came to the conclusion that he was. Definitely. Why else would his attention slip to the earrings dangling from Zoro's ear like Christmas tree balls? Well, they were odd balls since they were tear shaped, but hey, why not? He smiled stupidly and decided that it was not the best way to end this conversation but the most reasonable one to just go and take a nap. Five minutes and he would be as good as new.
"I guess I am," he said and raised the knife he had brought with him to finally cut the cake. The cake sort of started flowing over the table and Sanji wasn't sure if he would be able to catch it. "Man, this is hard," he sighed and with an annoyed grunt Zoro rose to his feet and stepped behind him, placing his hand over the cook's.
"Damn it, cook, it's just a cake. All you have to do is this," he growled and lead Sanji's hand towards the cake and helped him cut it. Zoro was warm against Sanji's back and somehow it made the effect of the alcohol worse. Sanji's head started spinning and he needed to close his eyes a little and rest. He pulled out his hand und Zoro's, turned to face him, wrapped his arms around his torso and rested his head in the crook of his neck. A moment later he was fast asleep.
- X -
Zoro didn't get it. The cook had been drunk, yes, and obviously more than Zoro had thought but that didn't explain why the moron had fallen asleep standing right beside the dining table.
"What the hell?" he voiced his surprise and laid an arm around the cook's back to prevent him from accidentally falling over. Looking at his friends in question he found them equally stunned. "I guess this hasn't happened before."
"Not really, bro," Franky said and started laughing. "But it is super funny."
"Thanks to this we'll be able to make fun of him for ages," Usopp agreed and Zoro was glad they didn't consider making fun of him as well. At least they didn't consider it yet.
"I guess, Mister Cook was up all day and working really hard to prepare this party and he's simply worn out."
"Sounds reasonable," Zoro mused and suddenly he felt guilty for coming home in the middle of the night without considering… Wow, hold it. He hadn't even known somebody would be living here so it wasn't his fault the idiot cook was tired. And as drunk as a lord from just a couple of drinks. "I'll take him to bed," he decided and poked the cook in the cheek. "Hey, moron, wake up and go to bed."
"Zoro!" Nami yelled and Zoro looked at her raising an eyebrow.
"What?"
"Can't you just let him sleep and carry him to bed. It's not like you are a wimp and he weights a ton. So just do it or I'll raise your interest and you know you already owe me more money than you are worth.
"Since when do I owe you money?"
"Shut up and take him to bed already!" she shouted and Zoro gave in without another word. Sometimes this witch was more than he could handle. Looking at the cook for a moment he contemplated simply throwing him over his shoulder. But then again it was very likely that Nami wouldn't like this idea so he picked him up bridal style and decided to simply not think about it.
He carried Sanji over to the bedroom and laid him on the bed without really considering the guest room an option. When he wanted to pull the blanket over him the cook opened his eyes a little and mumbled, "Hep me 'ndr'ss," before his eyes closed again.
Zoro didn't understand a word of it. Still, when the blonde tried to open a button of his shirt he could imagine what the other wanted.
"Oh, come on," he mumbled unhappily but still helped the cook to get rid of his necktie and dress-shirt. Admittedly, it would be really uncomfortable to sleep wearing these and Zoro wasn't sure if he would be able to explain it if the cook managed to strangle himself with his necktie in his sleep-so undressing him most likely was the lesser of two evils.
At least it was until it was time to undress the lower part of the cook's body.
"Mmh mh," Sanji mumbled when Zoro hesitated and drowsily kicked him in the side. It hurt. It really did and Zoro smiled in appreciation. Being able to hurt him in one's sleep wasn't something that happened often.
"Okay, okay, I'll do it!" he said before removing Sanji's shoes, he wasn't even sure when or why the freak had put them on, and his socks. His feet looked ordinary, still they were part of the insane power the sleeping moron held in his legs. It was almost disappointing.
When he finally removed the slacks he didn't really have the time to study the cook's legs before he pulled the blanket over himself and nuzzled his face into the pillow.
"And now?" Zoro asked himself and glared at the slacks in his hand. They didn't reply.
"Why don't you come back and join us for drinks and a piece of cake, Mister Bushido?" Robin asked from the door and smiled at him in her unique and utterly unfathomable way.
"Sounds sensible," he said placing the slacks on the bed and followed her back to his friends.
-x-
The next morning Zoro knew something was wrong the moment he awoke. He had been alone when he had gone to bed but he felt another body being pressed against his, soft breaths puffing against his back and strands of hair tickling the back of his neck. It was a tall and firm body, masculine. Most likely Sanji's. Wait.
The cook's arm was slung around Zoro's upper body and his hand was resting on Zoro's chest, his fingertips were slowly drawing circles on his skin.
What the hell was going on here and why did he have the cook in his bed? He listened to the cook's breaths, trying to figure out if he had accidentally woken him up. They were slow and steady. The warm skin of the cook was moving against Zoro's back every time he breathed in.
In a very weird way it felt nice.
The cook moved a little and suddenly his lips were brushing against the skin between Zoro's shoulder blades. They felt soft and cool, just like his hands.
A strange feeling spread in Zoro's chest. It reminded him of riding a rollercoaster. It made him feel uneasy but excited him at the same time. This was in no way how it should be. Slowly he slipped out from under Sanji's arm. He didn't understand what was going on but he knew he needed to get out of the bedroom as quickly as possible.
His heart beat incredibly hard against his ribcage when he went over to the wardrobe and hastily picked underwear, a pair of grey tracksuit trousers, and a dark blue tank top before he left the bedroom and hurried to the bathroom.
He closed the door and locked it as soon as he entered the bathroom. His heart was still thundering in his chest. Resting his back against the bathroom door he tried to calm down and make sense of what just had happened. He couldn't. He had never been weak to pleasure so why were these slight touches affecting him so much? He pushed himself off of the door and slipped out of his underwear. Maybe a shower would help him clear his mind.
Yet, this time it was only making things worse. The warmth of the water did nothing more than to remind him of the warmth of the cook's body. Memories from when he had pressed the cook against the bedroom door, grinding his groin into his body, and conquering his mouth, appeared before his mind's eye. It was wicked.
Cursing under his breath he turned the cold water on and hoped he could wash away excitement which was gushing over him. He needed to clear his mind and focus. Whatever had caused him to sleep with the cook-next to the cook in the same bed, he corrected himself-had to be a one-time thing. He was not supposed to develop feelings of any kind for the cook, except for friendship. And this weird fluttering in his chest felt like everything but plain, platonic friendship.
-X-
When Sanji had awoken he had felt a little hung over. He had kept his eyes shut and his breath as steady and calm as possible to get used to the situation when he had noticed the soothing warmth he had been nuzzled against. Searching through his memory for any hints that he had not gone to bed alone hadn't led to success. He hadn't been able to recall any detail about how he had gone to bed either.
He had tried to focus on what he felt being pressed against his body to figure out what had been going on. He had taken in the sensation of hot skin and the scent of another person. Unmistakeably, it had been Zoro in his arms but it hadn't been this fact that had freaked Sanji out. What had made his heart skip at least one beat was that he really wanted to touch the other man even more, to taste his skin. He had absolutely no idea how or why things had turned out like that but he had known that if Zoro had awoken then and noticed he had been awake as well and hugging him like his favourite teddy bear he would have been in deep shit.
It had felt surreal and he hadn't been able to stop himself from starting to slowly move his fingers in tiny, unsteady circles on Zoro's chest. Of course, he had noticed the change in Zoro's breathing, the surprise it showed. He had known he should have stopped but hadn't been able to. Somehow, oddly enough, it had aroused him-even if just a little.
The urge to taste Zoro's skin had become overwhelming and he had moved a little so his lips could examine another part of Zoro's unexpectedly soft skin. It had sent butterflies rushing through his stomach.
He had felt Zoro slip out from under his arm and then he had left in a supressed hurry.
Sanji could only roll on his back and wonder what the hell was wrong with him. He had never been attracted to a guy before and now he was acting like a weirdo. Why the fuck had Zoro been in his bed anyway… Oh, in his bed. Of course, Zoro would have went to his bed to sleep in just as Sanji most likely had. They sure as hell hadn't thought about the end of it before. Force of habit was a strange thing. Damn it.
Sanji needed a smoke.
He got up and prepared a change of clothes for after he had taken a shower.
He needed to look splendid for work and decided that a cigarette and a cup of coffee were an absolute necessity before that. Maybe it would help him to become his old self again without such unnecessary feelings. And of all people it had to be the brute he had a thing for. Great.
He left the bedroom to brew coffee just to find Usopp and Chopper sleeping on one couch as well as Brook and Franky on the other ones. They were really lucky that Zoro had such a huge apartment.
-X-
Stepping out of the bathroom dressed and calmed down again Zoro could smell freshly brewed coffee. He turned to see the cook looking up from the newspaper-a cup of coffee in his hand-and cracking a smile at him. It was a miracle to Zoro how he could have gotten rid of the mess all of them had caused yesterday in a couple of minutes.
"Good morning, marimo. You don't really want to go and meet Zeff in this ratty outfit, do you?" he asked.
"Whom? I didn't plan on going anywhere today," Zoro replied confused. Had he missed something again? Sanji just shook his head.
"The old geezer. He called yesterday and demanded to meet you," and when Zoro still showed no sign of understanding he added, "The guy who screamed at me for what felt like forever over the phone? Because Ivankov showed him certain pictures of a certain sous-chef and his live-in boyfriend?"
Zoro didn't like the way the cook emphasised that, but it did the trick to make him remember. Looking down on his attire he didn't see any mistake in it, though. He would even go there wearing a hessian sack. Life was no runway, he was no model, so why bother? Furthermore, he didn't need to impress anyone since he definitely was no boyfriend or something alike.
"I think this outfit is just perfect," Zoro stated and finally went over to the kitchen. "Is there more coffee?"
"Sure. Help yourself," Sanji said and folded the newspaper to a neat rectangle before he got up and emptied his cup of coffee in one long swallow. "I need to take a shower and you need to get changed. This outfit stinks and I won't take you to a restaurant like that."
And with that he was gone, leaving Zoro alone with his coffee and doubts about his getup. What the hell was wrong with him? He didn't need to get changed just because some drama-queen wanted him to.
"Damn it," he cursed and went to the bedroom to do as he was told. He didn't need this. But he didn't need another argument in the morning as well. He slipped on simple black trousers. If that didn't satisfy the cook he couldn't help him. He wouldn't wear a shirt or even a suit just to meet someone's father. If he had wanted to propose he might have considered it an option, but he didn't. At least this was something he could decide on his own. Which got him to thinking whether he had always been this easily bossed around.
Waiting for the cook to get ready he decided that it wouldn't hurt to leave a note to his friends-just in case they had forgotten where he and the cook were supposed to be by now as well. Looking at the clock in the kitchen it was a miracle to him that Sanji's cell hadn't rung already. It was quarter past ten. They were late.
He poured himself a cup of coffee and slowly sipped it, enjoying the strong and bitter taste of it. The coffee he had drunken before had never tasted like this. Maybe he had bought the wrong blend? Maybe he would ask the cook about that later.
The sudden ringing of Sanji's cell startled him and he nearly spilled his coffee. Damn this damn busybody calling now. He didn't understand why people needed cells anyway.
"Hello?" he said picking up Sanji's phone since the caller ID showed old geezer.
"Who is this and why are you picking up the little eggplant's phone?" the caller snapped.
"My name's Roronoa Zoro, pleased to make your acquaintance. The cook's taking a shower and I thought your call might be important so I picked up," Zoro explained and strolled over to the bathroom. "Please wait a second," he said before knocking at the bathroom door and shouting, "Oi, shit-cook, your dad's on the phone. Hurry up and get your ass dressed, I'm not your secretary!"
The door was yanked open and Sanji glared at him. The towel around his waist started loosening and destroyed the entire effect.
"For fuck's sake, can't anything go right this morning. What does he want?" Sanji hissed and hurried to fix the towel.
"Ask him yourself, 'cause-like I said-I'm not your secretary."
"Please do me the favour and ask him while I get dressed, shit-head," Sanji hissed and disappeared in the bathroom again without closing the door.
Zoro sighed.
"So, ahm," Zoro had forgotten Sanji's last name and the name of his father as well. Damn. He couldn't call him geezer, could he? "Sir, why are you calling?"
Zoro heard Sanji's laughter from the bathroom.
"It's Zeff, boy. Not Sir. I just wanted to tell the brat that he's late," Zeff replied and Zoro could hear amusement in his voice.
"He sais you are late," he transmitted the message to Sanji.
"I know that myself!" Sanji replied and came over to Zoro half dressed again, glaring at him. "Now guess whose fault that is. It took you ages to take a shower."
Zoro felt caught but tried his best to keep a blank expression.
"He said he's very sorry and unworthy of being your son," Zoro translated Sanji's statement and Zeff roared with laughter in response.
"You shitty liar! I never said that!" Sanji protested but Zoro didn't care.
"He said he's sorry for his poor cooking skills and will try his best to improve soon," Zoro translated again and slowly but surely found the idea of being the cook's secretary not that bothersome anymore.
"Tell him I'll be waiting for him," Zeff replied still laughing and hung up. Zoro just looked at Sanji.
"What?" Sanji demanded angrily when Zoro handed him his phone. But, really, Zoro didn't want to say anything. He simply enjoyed the moment.
It was nice to see the cook a little flustered.
"Nothing. I'm just looking," Zoro finally said after a while and noticed that he really was sizing the cook up. Being half naked sure made that easy and since he was awake now and not trying to hide his body, Zoro figured that it was alright. Unexpectedly, the cook was just a little less muscular than he himself was. The suits sure hid that well. He had looked almost skinny in his suit two years ago. But fighting with your legs was bound to require strength in your torso and a flexible body. Thinking about it he wondered what Sanji's skin would feel like if he touched it now. And then he wondered where that thought had come from.
"Look somewhere else, moron, this is not a peepshow," Sanji snapped and slammed the door shut.
"Can't you be quiet? My head is gonna 'xplode," Usopp mumbled and Zoro realised that they weren't alone. He had completely forgotten about his friends and that they had spent the night here.
Hadn't he been doing something before the cook's cell had rung?
Strolling over to his cup of coffee he saw a blank sheet of paper and remembered his plan. He wondered what to write except for 'good morning'.
He settled for a simple 'the cook and I are at his dad's restaurant. I'll ask him to bring food for you'. He didn't think there were more questions to be answered.
"What a shitty note," Sanji remarked looking over Zoro's shoulder. Zoro knew he had an exceptionally neat handwriting so the cook had to talk about the content of the note.
"Stop nagging and get your sorry ass to work before they decide to kick you out again."
Sanji took a brown winter coat from the wardrobe in the hall and looked at Zoro expectantly who just threw over his dark green coat and tied it with a dark red sash.
"Are you serious?" Sanji asked and frowned at him. "That thing sure as hell is not warm."
"No, but my keys are in its pocket."
The cook didn't reply anything. He didn't have to. Zoro knew exactly what he was thinking. He could read it from his expression that he thought Zoro was a hopeless nutcase .
Zoro just shrugged it off. He didn't need warmer clothing. End of story.
Stepping out on the street, Zoro realised it was freezing cold outside. It didn't bother him, though, but he finally understood why the cook thought he was a freak. He could see his breath freezing in the air in small white clouds. It wasn't his favourite time of the year, since he preferred autumn to all other seasons, but he liked the quiet and calm of frozen winter landscapes. They seemed to slow down time and cleanse the air. And even though he would never admit this little fact as well, he was enjoying the festive vibe coming from every house they passed by walking down the pavement towards the Baratie. He wasn't really fond of fancy Christmas decorations but he could feel the happiness behind them.
The minutes passed by in amiable silence and soon he could see the Baratie-and the shadow of a tall figure leaning against the wall next to its entrance. Coming closer he recognised Law and a deep frown appeared on his face. If Law was around it sure as hell meant trouble in one way or another. It irritated Zoro a little that Law didn't have Kid with him, since he couldn't remember ever seeing him without his lapdog. Sanji didn't seem to be bothered though, which was worrying Zoro on an entirely different level. Why the hell was it nothing out of the ordinary for the cook to have a warlord lingering around at his father's restaurant? Not that Law was a threat or anything like that but he wasn't the clientele restaurants were usually looking for.
When they were close enough to talk to each other Law pushed himself off the wall and stepped in their way, politely greeting them.
"Good morning and Merry Christmas, Zoro. Sanji." he said smiling. "It must be fate that both of you show up just when I wanted to talk to you."
"Good morning, Law, and Merry Christmas to you, too," Sanji replied stomping out his cigarette on the pavement. "It's rare for you to show up outside of your realms. What happened?"
Zoro just nodded towards Law to greet him.
"Nothing happened. At least nothing worth talking about. Not yet that is. But I need you to do me a favour, Sanji. But I can't explain the details right now, as you can imagine. After all I'm involved in things I'd rather not discuss out in the open."
"What favour?" Zoro asked warily. This wasn't about him but since Sanji was living with him he was responsible for him. To a certain extent. Somehow. A little. Maybe. What the fuck? This had nothing to do with him.
Law scrutinised him for a while before he answered, the smile never leaving his lips. "It's good to see you are fine, Zoro. There are interesting rumours about you having a certain blonde chef living at your place."
"What's it to you?" Zoro asked not really knowing what Law wanted to imply.
"To me this is essential. You don't intend to kick him out any time soon, do you?" Law asked with genuine interest and Zoro didn't know why information like this would mean anything to him.
"Not really. But why do you care?"
Law didn't pay attention to him anymore but focused on Sanji. His gaze lost his mild interest and turned into a pinning glare.
"I need your help and I will get it at any cost," he stated.
"But how am I supposed to help you? I'm just an ordinary chef," Sanji said but Zoro knew exactly that the cook was not just a chef. He was much more. He was a badass fighter, just like all of Luffy's friends. Luffy had a knack for making friends with strong personalities and incredible abilities, be it fighting or whatever came in handy.
"I need you to support my alliance with Luffy," Law started explaining without really explaining anything.
"If you already have Luffy at your side, I don't see a reason why you would need me," Sanji replied coolly and lit up another cigarette. Zoro thought the same. If Luffy was supporting Law's actions he and the cook would do everything in their might to support Luffy.
"Things aren't that simple to handle this time. I'll explain the details later but first tell me one thing: Are you and Zoro dating for real?"
Zoro was dumbfounded by that question. Why the hell would Law care about something as that? And how the fuck could he even know about their situation?
"How do you know about that?" Zoro asked without waiting for Sanji to react. He wouldn't have reacted anyway. He looked completely shocked by Law's question.
"It wasn't that hard to figure out when I heard Zeff screaming into his phone last night. Kid and I were here for dinner and, well, eavesdropped on it."
"This is not happening, is it?," Zoro said and pinched the bridge of his nose. He had been rather glad that Zeff hadn't yelled the details of his rage into the phone yesterday but Zoro would never have imagined that he had yelled across the entire Baratie. Damn it!
"Listen, Law, it's not as simple as that. Actually, Ivankov somehow managed to get snapshots of me... kissing Zoro-why it came to this is a long and unpleasant story. Anyway, he showed the pictures to Zeff," Sanji finally said after regaining his composure again, "And that led to a severe misunderstanding on his side."
Law's eyes flashed with glee when he heard that.
"That's just perfect," he said. "I would have loved to have come up with such an extravagant plan but life often surpasses your imagination, doesn't it?"
"I don't get a word you are saying," Sanji hissed, slowly getting angry and stomped out another spent cigarette on the floor. "What the fuck are you talking about?"
Law was still smiling when he finally answered the crucial question: "The favour I need from you is to convince everyone the relationship Ivankov set you up in is real."
"But why?" Sanji demanded to know lighting up another cigarette. "Give me a good reason and I will think about your idea before rejecting it."
"Like I said, I'll explain everything later, but I'll tell you this: Doflamingo is involved, I am, Kid is, Ace is, Luffy-and it would be really nice if Hancock were as well. "
"Sounds like one hell of a party to me," Zoro said and tried to figure out the meaning behind the names mentioned. Dealing with Doflamingo alone was enough of a reason to need all the help one could get but it didn't explain why Zoro would have to date the cook for it. "But why would you need us to be a couple for that?" he therefore asked.
Sanji sighed. "Because of Hancock, right?"
"Exactly," Law agreed. It didn't make sense to Zoro, though. "She hates your guts, Sanji, but she agreed to accept your company if I could prove her opinion of you wrong. It was like fate when I heard that you suddenly turned gay. And putting two and two together it only left Zoro to be your chosen one."
"Fate, huh?" Sanji mumbled grinding his teeth into his cigarette.
"I need all the help I can get-and I can't go without you because Luffy wouldn't be happy about it. But having you on board would cause Hancock to refuse her help. And having you in a stable relationship with a guy sounds like the perfect proof that you are not just a perverted jerk, right? So, what do you say?" Law asked.
"I don't mind," Zoro replied and Sanji's head snapped in his direction, eyes wide in surprise.
"What?" he breathed in utter disbelief.
"I don't mind acting your boyfriend," Zoro repeated and he meant it. Whatever was going on and causing Law to practically beg for Sanji's help was enough for him to consider it a serious problem. And he wouldn't stand there watching. What bothered him was that it didn't sit right with him to be all to willing to agree to this scheme. On the contrary, it caused his abdomen to tingle in excitement when he thought about it, which was pissing him off. Still, he tried not to show it. He needed the cook to agree to this as well and he would get nowhere when the idiot thought he was mad at him.
He didn't take his eyes of Sanji for even a second. He could see the thoughts racing in his mind and suddenly he wasn't so sure about his decision anymore. The longer it took the cook to make up his mind the more Zoro regretted giving in to his whim. But then finally a mischievous smile appeared on Sanji's lips, and a wave of relief gushed through Zoro's veins.
"Fine," Sanji said and looked Zoro straight in the eye. "But I have one condition: I'll tell Zeff we are lovers but you will have to convince him I'm not bullshitting him. If you can't do that, the deal's off-and believe me, I won't make it easy for you. I have a reputation to defend."
"Whatever. I don't give a damn anyway," Zoro replied and Sanji nodded. So they had a deal. And he was not happy about it. Definitely not. A smile spread on his lips.
"I just hope you don't regret this because I won't go easy on you either."
"Bring it on, moss-head."
"You bet I will, shit-cook."
"I really don't want to disturb your chitchat, but…," Law interrupted them obviously amused, "thank you. I owe you for this."
"You don't have the slightest clue how much you owe us, Law," Sanji said, "How about we discuss this at dinner? I still insist on getting a very convincing explanation."
"I'll be there," Law replied. "And I'll bring Ace along."
"Ace?" Zoro asked perplexed. "Why is he here? Isn't he on the run?"
"That will be part of the explanation. I think Sanji's father is already about to run rampage because you are extremely late by now."
"Damn it, I completely forgot about the geezer," Sanji hissed and stormed off.
Zoro just watched him leave. How in the world had this morning developed like this? When he had left the house everything had been just fine and now he had willingly gotten himself a boyfriend. The fuck? He would never be able to explain this to anyone, let alone his somehow-father-in-law-to-be.
"Care to join me for breakfast?" Law invited him and Zoro just nodded and followed him inside. He would prefer booze over breakfast but that would most likely be the worst first impression possible. And he wouldn't bring shame over himself just like that.
Law sat down at a table in the back of the Baratie where Kid was waiting for them. He was obviously bored out of his mind while bending his tea spoon in various ways.
"Finally," he welcomed Law back. "All this waiting was starting to make me want to kill someone."
"You succeeded in killing the spoon," Law replied smiling again. Zoro wasn't sure if he had ever seen another expression on his face. He either looked neutral or was smiling. There was no anger or anything like that in his expressional repertoire. Or he was simply beyond such low emotions.
"You are awfully funny as always," Kid commented and looked up at Zoro. "You are late. Did you get lost on your way here?"
"Like hell got I lost. I was talking to your boss," Zoro replied knowing it would piss Kid off. Kid didn't like being considered a subordinate, no matter how true it was.
"Oh really? So, are you dating Sanji or what?" Kid asked brushing off Zoro's attempted insult grinning mischievously.
"We'll see," Zoro replied not really willing to discuss such matters with the redhead.
"I told you two years ago that it would end like this. You should have asked him out back then instead of disappearing. It would have saved us lots of trouble."
"I wouldn't say that," Law butted in. "I have high hopes in the improvement of both your skills over the last two years. They should be worth my patience."
Zoro thought about their words and it surprised him that he could actually remember Kid's remarks about being in love with the cook back then.
"What the fuck are you saying?" a voice yelled on the upper floor and a moment later the door to the kitchen crashed open as Sanji's body hit it. The sheer momentum caused him to fly over the banister and directly towards their table.
"Or not," Kid commented Law's statement rolling his eyes when Sanji landed on their table. It was a miracle he didn't break it but jumped right back up towards the upper floor with just as much as causing a soft thud. Grabbing the banister he yanked himself over it screaming "You shitty geezer!"
Zoro just stared in awe. The landing had been flawless and he was sure he would have simply destroyed the table crashing into it. Furthermore jumping up to the upper floor was a nice move in itself. It wasn't something ordinary people did. The urge to challenge Sanji for a battle gushed over him again and caused his fingertips to prickle. It had only been one and a half day since he had last fought someone but he already felt the lack of adrenaline in his blood.
"Oh, look at our lovesick puppy," Kid teased but Zoro didn't bother answering. The screaming in the kitchen went on but he wasn't sure if anything else except for 'shitty geezer' and 'What the fuck?' was said. It didn't sound like it.
"Looks like you'll have to explain a lot to his father," Law finally said when the noise died down.
"I never expected anything else," Zoro said. "After all, giving me hell is part of our deal."
"I always knew you were masochistic," Kid stated, finally breaking the tea spoon. "Oops," he commented it.
"Oi, marimo, Zeff wants you up here," Sanji shouted from the upper floor, a satisfied smile on his lips.
"Wish me luck," Zoro said rising from his seat. "I'm sure I'll need it."
He took his time ascending the stairs, since he still had no idea what to say to Zeff. Setting eyes on Sanji's smug smile as he gestured him to enter the kitchen he knew something was odd. But that didn't stop him. He opened the door and stepped inside.
He knew the kick was coming before he even set eyes on Zeff in the kitchen. The older man's wooden leg hit the side of his head hard enough to show the man's skill and power-but it wasn't enough to make Zoro flinch, though. He only stared at the huge moustache poking out from the older man's face and his huge chef's hat. It was, well, extraordinary. If not to say ridiculous but he wouldn't allow himself to think so poorly of his fake-father-in-law-to-be.
He heard the other cook's in the room gasp for air watching what just had happened.
"This can't be," one of them breathed dumbfounded.
"Told you so," Sanji said coolly and brushed Zoro by to enter the kitchen as well, a content smile gracing his lips.
"But to be completely unaffected by the boss's kick-even you can't do that, Sanji," another one of the cooks said and Zoro could see a vein pop on Sanji's forehead before he lit up a cigarette.
"That's not the point," Sanji said and puffed out a cloud of smoke.
"Is that really why I had to come up here? So I could get kicked in the face?" Zoro asked rather annoyed. This was not really what he had imagined meeting Sanji's dad would have been.
"You are here because I wanted to meet the little eggplant's boyfriend face to face," Zeff said. He sounded quite uneasy to Zoro but he couldn't figure why.
The cook's in the back of the kitchen started whispering to each other. Well, whatever. It didn't matter to Zoro.
"You still believe that shit, owner?" one of them spoke up. "Sanji, for fuck's sake tell him you don't go for guys!"
"I don't go for guys, still I fell for Zoro," Sanji declared and the sincerity in his voice did not just startle his colleagues. Zoro had never been confessed to before but this just felt like the real deal. A disturbingly pleasant warmth spread in his stomach and a tiny smile appeared on his lips.
"Don't grin like an idiot, say something!" Sanji demanded cocking a curly eyebrow at Zoro before kicking him in the shin. What the fuck were you supposed to say when you were being confessed to? Thank you? That was unlikely.
"I truly appreciate your feelings and hope I can prove to be worthy of them," he finally replied in his most humble kendo-champion-manner. But what surprised him the most was that he really meant it. This was a disaster since he was supposed to just act the lover and not to fall in love for real. But right now he was just a little bit moonstruck.
Everyone in the room just stared at him in silence until Sanji couldn't bite back his laughter anymore.
"You are so adorable," he gasped between fits of laughter. Zoro felt truly humiliated. Adorable was a word he had never heard in a description of him. And he wasn't sure he wanted that to change. It felt wrong on a fundamental level. Maybe it was due to the fact that the idiot-cook was laughing at him.
"Fuck you, asshole!" he snapped and lashed out at Sanji. Sanji dodged it but Zoro could grab his shirt nonetheless and shoved his back roughly against the nearest wall, forcing all the air out of his lungs and effectively cutting off his laughter.
"I'm being serious here," he hissed but Sanji just smiled at him, highlighting the silence around them. Zoro could practically feel the stares of everyone around them.
"That is your most adorable feature," Sanji finally whispered and grasped Zoro's face to pull him in closer. Zoro hadn't know the cook could be so gentle. His kiss felt like silk running over his skin but it was over way too quickly.
"Now, let go of me, I need to go and serve the customers," Sanji demanded back to his usual self.
"Who said you can go anywhere, little eggplant?" Zeff asked now deeply frowning. "I want answers. Haven't you always been head over heels for every woman who was unlucky enough to cross your path? What the hell happened?"
Zoro finally realised he hadn't even said hello to his supposed-father-in-law-to-be. Damn. But he had been greeted with a kick in the face so it should be fine.
"He happened," was all Sanji had to say to that topic.
"That's not an answer!" Zeff yelled and Zoro could understand that only too well. If you wanted to get answers you were better off asking someone else. Or Zeff and he were just too plain stupid to ask the right questions. Still, Zeff managed to finally make Sanji lose his cool and burst out in anger.
"I fell in love! Is that so hard to understand? If what you saw of him so far isn't enough to convince you please you do me the favour and at least try to get to know him and you'll understand! He is shitty amazing!" he yelled and stormed out of the kitchen leaving a shocked Zoro and his deeply frowning father behind.
Zoro didn't know what to do. Again. Slowly but surely this was getting a habit whenever the blonde cook was involved. He felt the stares on him once again and this time he could feel his ears getting hot. This was embarrassing and he could feel his cheeks turn hot.
And finally Zeff started laughing.
"I've never seen him like that before," Zeff said after having calmed down again and something that could have been a smile appeared beneath his moustache. "And now get your lazy asses back to work!" he yelled at his employees before turning to Zoro again. "You don't seem to understand what's going on with him as well."
"Not one bit. But it doesn't matter. It is what it is and I'm fine with it," Zoro admitted. It was scary that he really meant it. He was fine with their entire situation. Maybe even content and the more he thought about it the less it freaked him out. Zeff opened the kitchen door and motioned for Zoro to follow him outside. The older man rested his arms on the banister and let his gaze wander over the guest room until it finally settled on Sanji sitting next to Law, facing Kid who was laughing heartily at Sanji's unhappy expression.
"So, for how long have you known each other? He told me you'd explain everything to me."
"We only met thrice over the past three years. All in all I'd say I've known him for about thirty-six hours-and that's just because I came home thirty two hours ago and found him residing at my place," Zoro explained and even to him it sounded ridiculous. Nevertheless, Zeff seriously thought about that before he asked his final question.
"How can you say you're in love with him then?"
"I never said I was. But I can't say I'm not either. I don't understand it myself. He's just so..." Zoro was at a loss for words. How could he describe someone he barely knew to his father without sounding like an idiot? So he decided that he had nothing more to say. Talking about his personal fear of being willing to completely submit himself to someone was just out of the question. That was something he would never admit out loud. He wouldn't accept these feelings without fighting them. It would be a fierce battle and he already had a notion he would lose it, but that wouldn't keep him from fighting. A smile spread on his lips and he shook his head in surrender.
"The word you are looking for is 'intense'," Zeff interrupted his train of thought. "Boy, you are just as stupid as he is. Why don't you take him home to figure out the obvious yourselves without annoying the fuck out of me?" Zeff said and suddenly he raised his voice to yell at Sanji.
"Don't you dare show your mug here again until January little eggplant! I've had enough of your bullshit already! And take this besotted idiot with you!"
….xxXxx…..
I'm sorry to disappoint, but that was it for now. I hope you've had fun. I would really love if you'd tell me your opinion on this chapter or the story as a whole so far. Thank you! Yours, Sanni-O