A/N: Hey everyone!! So, I just couldn't wait for the next chapter, so I began right away even though it took me a while to finish. The reviews were amazing, like always, and they were what got me to continue. Thank you. You have no idea how much I really appreciate it. :) Anyway, late as it is, here's chapter 4! I hope you like it!

Chapter 4

Before I knew what had happened, I was in Alice's car, headed to the Cullen household. I couldn't focus on anything, or even try to comprehend what would happen once I was there. I stared out the window, watching the scenery pass by. We were driving into a deserted area, a forest that nobody went near. I wasn't surprised. Had I really been expecting them to live in a house surrounded by neighbors? No. It might have been a few years, but I could still remember every detail about each of the Cullens.

"We're here," Alice murmured, turning down a hiking path. I still only saw trees, but it was just a few minutes before a large house came into view. The majority of the house was white, partially covered with stone. It was beautiful. There were large and small windows with grey shutters covering the front. Although it was currently cloudy, I could imagine the way the house must light up when sunlight floods into it. The car came to a stop, parked behind a few others, ones that I recognized as Carlisle's, Emmett's, Rosalie's, and Edward's. I felt my heart come to a stop. "Breathe, Bella," Alice reminded. I tried to compose myself, but I didn't know how I could possibly do this. "You've always been welcome with us. You're still family and you and I both know that you deserve an explanation for what happened." I nodded, the words slowly sinking in.

We both got out of the car and began to walk towards the house. There was music playing, and I recognized Emmett's feet sticking out from underneath his jeep. "What's up, Bella?" he asked, not even peering out from the vehicle.

Hey, Emmett," I quietly murmured back. Alice grabbed my hand, sending a cold shock through me, pulling me towards the house at a quicker pace.I reluctantly followed as we stepped into the home.

The house was huge. White walls, a grand staircase, open doorways leading into numerous rooms. My eyes were drawn into a far corner where a piano rested. I felt my eyes well up, hearing Edward's lullaby clearly in my mind as if he had played it only seconds ago. Alice hugged me, but it didn't register. "Hey everybody," Alice announced, no louder than a moderate voice. "Come down and welcome back an old family member." Within seconds, Esme and Carlisle were next to me, followed by Jasper.

"Bella," Esme commented while hugging me. "It's so good to see you again. We all missed you so much. I'm so sorry that we left without explaining or even saying goodbye."

"It's okay," I replied, hugging her back. When she let go, I nodded to both Calisle and Jasper, acknowledging then without words. Descending slowly down the steps was Rosalie, as beautiful and graceful as ever. I still felt a spark of jealousy rush through me at the sight of her. She came to stand beside Jasper, not saying a word to me. "Rosalie."

"Bella." The room grew quiet and intense as awkwardness spread through me.

"So..." Alice began, but she didn't continue with whatever she was going to say.

"Are you hungry?" Esme asked, trying to start a small conversation.

"Um, no, thanks," I hesitated.

"Well, let us know if you need anything," she continued. "You're welcome to stay for as long as you like. I'll be in the kitchen if you get bored."

"Thanks."

Everyone began to spread out, going back to their previous activities. Alice remained next to me. I couldn't make my feet move, though, I really had no where to go to. "That was awkward," she murmured. I could only nod. She put her arms around my shoulders and gave me a small hug. "It's not like anything has changed. We all still love you, Rosalie is still herself, and well... Edward is the only one that's really changed. But don't feel bad because that's his fault." I released I breath that I hadn't realized I'd been holding. Maybe it was just because of the mention of Edward's name. Why did he still effect me like this? "Why don't we go sit out back?" she offered. I nodded, willing to do anything but stand there.

I followed Alice out onto the back patio. We sat in two extremely comfortable seats, which faced the woods surrounding their house. Nothing was said for a few minutes and I was ready to go back to my dorm and lock myself in. "I'll be back," she said, jumping up and walking, almost running human speed back into the house. I sighed once again. What kind of excuse could I make to leave? Would they be mad or understand?

I continued to sort through my options until my thought process was interrupted by a voice behind me. "Bella."

I closed my eyes, praying it was my imagination. But I knew it wasn't. I held my breath for the thousandth time since I had arrived. "Edward." His footsteps were quiet, but I could sense him circling around my chair. Even though I avoided his gaze, I could feel his eyes on me as he sat down into Alice's evacuated seat. Alice!

His voice startled me as he spoke, the last few seconds having been so silent. "I can't give you the explanation you deserve. But I didn't leave to hurt you. I was trying to..." he paused, trying to find the right words. "...help you." The last two words caught my attention. For the first time in I don't know how long, my eyes met his. The color burned right through me, momentarily stopping my heart. They were the same liquid color, the same focus, as they had been when he had left me. "We both knew you would never be safe with me. I thought it would be better for you if I hadn't ever been with you. You'd have been safer if...well, maybe not safer. You'll always be a danger magnet." He laughed at his own joke, but I didn't. I wanted to deny it actually, but I couldn't. "With James and Victoria and who knows what else I could've gotten you involved in...Bella, I was trying to protect you. But I went about it the wrong way. I was never trying to hurt you, I would never do that. I hurt both of us and I'm so sorry, Bella. It's not enough, I know. But nothing I could ever do will make up for what I did."

I shook my head and, dare I say it, smiled. "You've always been too hard on yourself. You overthink everything."

"Maybe in your opinion, but not mine," he continued, looking down at his hands. "I am sorry."

"It's okay," I replied. I sat up at the edge of the seat and hesitantly took his hand into mine. The coldness of it sent a shock through me, but my body welcomed it. His eyes met mine again, and I could feel my heart begin to beat faster. No. I reminded myself. It won't amount to anything ever again. Besides, you have Tristan... Tristan! How could I have forgotten. "I have to go!" I jumped up, trying to gather my bearings.

"Bella, if it was something I said..."

"No," I interrupted. "It's my boyfriend. I was supposed to meet him hours ago."

"You have a boyfriend?"

I met his stare hesitantly. He wasn't mad, but I couldn't understand the meaning behind his look. "I'll explain later," I promised. "Right now, I just really need to get back to the campus as quickly as possible."

He nodded. "I'll drive."

The ride was quiet. For the millionth time today, everything was awkward. I didn't know what to say, or even if there was anything to be said. Edward drove well above the speed limit as it became dark. Before I knew it, we pulled into the parking lot closest to my dorm.

"Thanks for the ride, Edward." I looked at him before I exited. He continued to stare out the window, not saying anything to me. "I guess I'll see you later then."

"Bye," he murmured as I got out of the car. The car didn't move as I walked away. I wasn't sure what I should be expecting to find once I got back to my room. But I was even more confused about my feelings towards Edward, and his for me.

I fumbled for my key, only to realize the door was unlocked. I opened it to find Tristan pacing. His infuriated glare turned towards the door and onto me when I entered. He exploded. "Where the hell were you!!"

A/N: Finally! I didn't think I would ever get this finished. With exams and work and the Host...ok, I'm done making excuses. Thanks so much for reading my story so far. I absolutely love the reviews and I'm so excited to know what everyone thought about this chapter and the story so far. Anyway, thanks for reading. It means a lot to me and you guys are absolutely amazing!!