Eli's point of view

I got to Clare's house and took a deep breath I thought I got to avoid this but I can't she deserves to know what was going through my mind and what I was about to do...What I stopped her from doing with me I thought I didn't to do anything with that I? No I didn't I replayed what happend in my head...She touched me softly and I felt my dick start to harden, her red and black bra was in my face and her legs were wrapped around me I was so close to touching her and...OH my god I wanted to touch her what! No I didn't if I did I would have and I don't and never will do anything with anyone all those things I was feeling was nothing im a guy right it happens .Things like this happens to any guy they could have one time thing with someone and not feel anything for that person at all , and the fact it is I didn't do anything I didn't even kiss Jenna or touch her or... I finally got out of the car after all the thinking I had and I knew I had to be completly honest with Clare about what happened I am more scared now than I was before.

I knocked on her door she opened it"hi"she said not really looking me in the eyes that's not a good sign."Hey " I said I quickly leaned down and kissed her on the cheeck she smiled slightly and just walked back to her living room I hate this the distance between us I wanna hold her in my arms and kiss her all over and tell her how much I love her and only her I never felt this way about anyone not even when I was with Julia.Julia I remeber the last time I saw her we were fighting and then I lost her forever I don't wanna lose Clare. She sat down on her living room couch she just stared down at the floor and started shaking a little it took me couple of minutes to realize she was crying I haven't even told her anything yet "Clare why are you crying?" I asked helpless "I don't know Eli I just can't help it ,the thought of you with someone else, with Jenna just kills me inside you know Jenna stole K.C from me and after a while I was fine with it you know why ?" she said with tears running down her face I didn't answer"because I didn't love him Eli , I love you !" then I started to cry I grabbed her hands and held them in mine and knelt down in front of her and looked in to her bright blue eyes wich still had tears in them and she looked back at me, I wiped the tears away from her face "Clare " I started "so do you wan't to know or not?" I asked her she just nodded "well so I was in my math teachers class and the lights went off all of the sudden and I heard the door shut I ask who's their and Jenna appears and says 'just someone who wants to play' " she flinched in understanding" I was asking her what was she talking about and who she was because I didn't know who it was then but then I saw her clearly and she said something about wanting to have fun how K.C is boring her and that I caught her eye.." I took a deep breath Clare just kept staring at me straight in the eyes trying to read me I could feel it it's like she wanted to read my mind ,she was analyzing my every word and movement I kept going "I asked her what the fuck problem was her problem telling her I was with you and that I know she knows that and that slut said 'well I stole Clare-bear's first boyfriend why I can't I have you too' then she started touching me and breathing on me I tried to pull away then she grabbed on my belt buckel she nibbeled on my ear and I tried to push her away but she held on to me then I called her a whore she wrapped her legs around me and pulled me closer to her and I..." I stopped again and looked at her "then what ? What happened ,tell me!" she was getting anguished like she couldn't stand it any longer "I pushed her against the teachers desk and without thinking I unbuttoned her shirt but that's were I drew the line and stopped and pulled her away and walked away and didn't look back and came to you feeling completly guilty at were it could have gone." I looked down at the floor in shame not wanting to look up we were quite for what seemed like forever" that's it no kissing no touching no nothing you didn't do anything I thought yould like grab her as soon as you saw her in her bra" she said I looked at her "why would I do that? I don't even like her at all why would I want to do anything with her she's a slut last time I checked sluts aren't worth it" I stated and it's true I officially hate sluts now I thought that goes on the top of the list of many things I hate I thought Clare grabbed my face and kissed me hard on the lips with so much pashion she pushed me down slowly to her living room floor and I felt her body all over me I wrapped my arms around her tightly not wanting to let go I wanted to keep he here in my arms with me always she went down slightly and kissed me on my jaw then on my neck and she pulled away and looked at me "I love you Eli so much ,I can't help but feel like this is my fault maybe if we did more things physically you'd have no reason to feel a need with anyone else" what is she saying I looked at her confused "what are you talking about, why are you blaming yourself? if theirs anyone to blame is Jenna she's the one who can't keep her hands to herslef" she looked at me with a serious face" I can see it in your eyes Eli every time were together you want to do more but you know I probably won't like it so you don't wanna push me, im telling you we can take our relationship were ever you want I might even be ready to you know..." she trailed of and started to blush ,was she saying what I think shes saying will she let me touch her and kiss her all over and do all the things I've dreamed of doing with her since I met her but I knew their would be no chance since I saw that purity ring on her and she's practically saying she wants to have sex with me too "Are you serious Clare? Are you sure" she smiled I know we had a great time the last time I was hear but that was nothing I wanna give her pleasure,I want her to scream my name in pleasure in love, in lust, in want. I want her to want me and I have her touch me and give me pleasure my mind got cloudy with that thought. "do you wanna start now ?" she asked and winked at me I was completly shocked what if her parents walk in on us then we'd be both dead well more her than me if were going to do anything it should be at my house my parents won't care as long as I keep my room locked "not here lets go to my house."

...OH I GOT YOU WANTING MORE DIDN'T I please review I'll post the next chapter later and it's gonna be steamy ;) you have been WARNED...REVIEW!