Friendships! Hello! First of all, I'm so sorry I'm so late with this! But the good news is that it's here, we're all here and not only is this a new chapter, it's also an extra long chapter. *happy dance*
So the reasons for this being so delayed is that work has gotten really busy again. My theatre has begun its new season and I've taken on more responsibilities. Happy to announce I was promoted though – woohoo! Anyway, even though things are getting super busy again, I'm going to try to write as much as I can in my down time and keep updating this baby whenever I can. More good news, I finally have wifi! So no more stealing t'internet. I'm a good girl I am.
Soooooo here it is. Chapter 4. Thank you to everyone who is reading and to everyone that has commented and added me to alerts etc. You're all stars!
I hope you enjoy this chapter. It was fun to write, a little heavy on the brain but really fun none the less. Remember to let me know what you guys think, I love hearing from you all.
xxx
Chapter 04
The first month of the new school year had kept Minerva even busier than usual. A small flu outbreak had swept through the school causing students and staff to miss various days in the second and third week. Thankfully Poppy, Pomona and Severus had been able to get the epidemic under control but Minerva had still been left with more than half of her First Years needing her attention. It was because of this that she had not seen much of Severus outside of meal times. His frustration was clear to her and she noticed the way he sneered at her whenever she smiled at him; she knew not to take him seriously. He wasn't really angry, at least not with her.
Life at the school had calmed as they entered October and Minerva now found herself entering Edinburgh Castle for the recital Peter had invited them to. Severus walked close to her side, a hand on her back as they manoeuvred around chatting guests. They hadn't had much chance to talk, the short taxi journey to the castle had been mostly quiet, with Severus only enquiring after the programme. If it had been anyone else, it may have felt awkward but with him, it felt natural. It was normal. She'd smiled at the thought.
"Neva!"
Peter's voice bellowed above the din as he made his way toward them. Minerva heard the scoff that came from Severus and she smirked, glancing at him from the corner of her eye. She felt his hand press into her back for a moment longer before it slipped away from her.
"It's so good to see you," Peter said as he pulled her into his chest and gave her a tight hug. As he pulled away, Minerva stepped aside so that he could pull Severus into a hug too. "Severus, my boy," he smiled and patted him on the back when he released him. "It's been too long. How are you?"
"Well," Severus said with a curt nod. "Thank you for inviting me."
"Not at all," Peter smiled. "You're always welcome here."
They had toasted the evening together and Minerva had enjoyed having her brother-in-law in their company for the night. It wasn't often that Peter was just a guest at an event, he was usually entertaining or hosting but tonight was for pleasure. This was his evening off and, as he told Severus, he could think of no better way to spend his time than listening to excellent music with his friends. Severus had raised an eyebrow at that and Minerva had smiled at him. It was just after this that Peter and Severus entered into quite a debate over their preferred classical music era. She had listened intently, delighting in the intelligent verbal match as each pleaded their case. They had each tried to recruit her for their cause but she had managed to keep to the sidelines for the time being.
The recital itself had been enjoyable but once it was over, it had not formed much of their conversation. They had decided to head onto the Mile where they made their way to a small pub that was located in the hidden city under a church. The catacombs were a popular tourist attraction and this particular pub served not only muggle alcohol but also Fire Whiskey, Fishy Green Ale and Gilly Water if you knew how to ask for it. Severus had insisted he buy them all a drink and after he helped Minerva out of her jacket, he headed for the bar to order their drinks.
Minerva sat down at a secluded table with Peter, glad to have a few moments to catch up just the two of them. Just as she was about to ask after the rest of the family, he cut in with his own question. "How long have you been sleeping with him?"
Minerva stared at him, her mouth hanging open in astonishment. She had been so careful all evening not to show any kind of familiarity with Severus, ignoring her body when it called out to feel his hand on her back again. She had been worried when Severus had slipped his arm around her waist to move her away from someone who was trying to pass behind her when they were talking at the castle but Peter had made no sign that he had noticed the exchange and Severus had stepped away from her quickly enough to not draw attention. After all, it was perfectly innocent.
"I..." she wasn't entirely sure what she should say him. She had never kept a lover from him before, she had never lied to him and she had sworn to never keep secrets from him since the day Bertie died. But she didn't feel ready to tell him about this because she wasn't sure she wanted to hear what he had to say on the matter. He had warned her against this very thing when she and Severus had last visited his home and she had been adamant at the time that it was nothing for him to worry about. She had believed in that enough at the time to feel that she wasn't lying to him. And at this moment, she still didn't want to lie to him but she wished now that Severus hadn't left them alone. "I... we're friends..." she began, avoiding his eyes. She truly did not know what to say to him.
"You've never lied to me before sister," he said, touching her arm gently in an attempt to comfort her.
Guilt racked her body and she sighed. "I'm not," she said, covering his hand with her own. "We are friends first and foremost."
"But you are also lovers," he stated. His eyes were unreadable and Minerva hesitated for a moment, unsure how to move forward.
"Occasionally," she said quietly. "Yes."
Peter gave her a sad smile and he grasped her hand in his. "I don't want either of you to get hurt," he said.
"We won't," she gave him a slight smile. "For the first time it's a level playing field. Neither of us are expecting happily ever after and our friendship means more to us than anything else."
"I assume Lydia and Logan do not know about this."
Minerva couldn't help but laugh at that and she was glad that Peter's eyes had softened, his smile no longer sad. "Goodness no," she said, shaking her head. "They have told me of their suspicions but I have denied them. They do not know."
"Probably just as well," Peter nodded. "Lydia would throw a fit!"
At the mention of what Lydia would do if she found her, Minerva's stomach began to twist into knots. "Pete..." she swallowed nervously. "Please tell me that this is... that you..." She didn't really know what she needed to hear from him.
Peter frowned, his eyes filling with worry. "You've never sought my approval before," he said after a moment. "Are you having doubts?"
"No!" She said quickly, shaking her head. "He... he makes me happy. And I know how that probably sounds, I wouldn't believe it if I wasn't living it but he does. He understands what I've been through and that's... it's a gift. He never pushes or demands anything of me. Somehow we help each other forget how damaged we are. We've drifted to each other in unlikely circumstances but I think we've made a difference to each other. We've made it easier... it's hard to explain..."
Minerva stopped talking when she caught the way Peter was looking at her. He smiled and without speaking, he pulled her into a hug and held her. "In that case my dear sister," he said, pressing a kiss to her temple and letting her go. "I'm happy for you."
Minerva let out a sigh of relief and smiled at him. The guilt and the tension from her body suddenly evaporated and she felt elated. "It feels good to tell someone," she said, grasping his hand again. "I'm glad you know."
"No one else does?" He asked.
"People may suspect," she said, thinking of Albus. "But no, I haven't told anyone."
"You're secret is safe with me," he smiled. "I hope that I will see more of you both this year and I want you both to be comfortable around me. Please do not feel as though you have to pretend or hold anything back here."
Minerva smirked. "Is that what gave us away?"
"It was as though you were afraid a spotlight would appear above you if you so much as brushed hands," he laughed. Minerva rolled her eyes but she laughed anyway. She should have known better than to think that she'd be able to hide this from him. She'd need to talk to Severus about this conversation later.
As the evening wore down, Minerva and Severus said a long goodbye to Peter and had watched him climb into a taxi. They had chosen to walk to Prince's Street where they would be able to use the Floo Network in Abbott's but Severus had stopped halfway along the North Bridge and looked out over the river. She stepped up beside him and didn't resist when he circled his arm around her waist and pulled her into his side. She felt his thumb caressing her back under her jacket and she looked up at his face. He was thinking deeply about something, his brow creased and his lips thinned and she leaned back slightly, concerned.
"What is it?" She asked, caressing his neck softly.
Severus sighed. "Peter knows," he said after a moment.
Minerva nodded. "What did he say to you?"
He looked down over the bridge wall at the water that glittered in the moonlight. "He said... he said he was happy... for us..."
He sounded so uncertain, as if he hadn't believed what Peter had said to him. She leaned into him again, hoping it would help ease his mood. "He said the same thing to me," she said quietly.
She watched him nod slowly before he turned to look at her. She wished she could read what he was thinking on his face. "Did you tell him?"
"He already knew," she was beginning to worry. He wasn't giving anything away of what he was really thinking and she found it frustrating. Was he angry that Peter knew? Or was it more that she had told him? "He figured it out..."
"Because you were acting odd," he said, looking down at her. She saw something flash in his eyes and a wave of anger passed through her. She pushed his arm away from her and stepped back.
"We both were," she said after a moment, trying not to let her emotions take control of her.
"Why?" He asked, respecting the distance she had put between them.
"I was nervous," she said. "I can't speak for you but I would imagine you may have felt the same."
"He's your brother-in-law," he said as if it filled in the blanks. It didn't. He hadn't reacted any differently in front of her friends or her sister, not even Logan. "He is Bertie's brother..." He continued. "I don't... I was worried that if he knew, you might change your mind. Reconsider this..."
"I wouldn't," she said, crossing her arms over her chest. "I admit that I was being too careful tonight and it was because we were with Peter. When he asked me... I was worried about his response but no matter what it would have been, it wouldn't have made a difference to my actions." He nodded and looked down at the ground. "I've never done this before... I've never taken a lover for the sake of sex and nor have I engaged in a sexual relationship with a close friend. Especially with someone that is younger than myself. Peter knows this and he was a little concerned that I might get hurt. That we both might."
Severus nodded again and he slowly lifted his eyes to look at her. "He didn't seem to care about all that stuff," he said quietly. "The sex or the age difference... he just said that if we were helping each other and we were happy then so was he. He said he'd be there if we ever needed him."
Minerva felt her heart swell with warmth at the thought her of brother-in-law and once again she was reminded why she loved him so dearly. "He cares very much about you," she gave him a small smile and stepped toward him, closing the gap a little.
"I'm not used to that," Severus said through his teeth.
Minerva stepped into his space and brushed her nose along his jaw as he wrapped his arms around her again. "Then you'll have to get used to it."
Severus scoffed and leaned back slightly to look down at her. "When must we return to the school?"
"We are held to no schedule," she smirked. "As long as we are back before breakfast tomorrow morning, we shall not be missed."
Minerva watched his eyes flicker to her lips and she felt her skin tingle in sudden anticipation. She felt acutely aware of just how long it had been since she'd kissed him, how long it had been since she'd felt his hands on her body. There had been moments in the month preceding that she had been tempted to go back on the one rule she'd put in place for their arrangement but she hadn't allowed herself.
However, they were no longer at the school...
Severus' lips grazed hers and she could feel how heavy his breathing had become. "Will you spend the night with me?"
She smiled. "Yes." At that, he finally pressed his lips against hers and kissed her. The kiss was slow, maddeningly slow and she had a feeling he was doing it on purpose. She bit on his bottom lip and she felt him scoff. When she pulled back, he was smirking.
They had made their way along the rest of the bridge and onto Prince's Street. They headed into the first hotel they passed on the corner. She may have felt sleazy if the hotel hadn't been as nice as it was. It was hard to think that what you were doing was questionable when you were stood in the foyer of a five star hotel ordering room service to their luxury room. She had offered to pay but Severus had refused, insisting he take care of it. She smirked but allowed him to do as he pleased and headed to the lift to wait for him. As she watched him finishing up at the desk, she wondered where the sane part of her brain had gone. There wasn't one part of her mind that was at odds with what they were doing. She wondered if she'd finally lost her mind.
They discussed the recital as they made their way up to their room. "She lacked the finesse of her peers," Severus sneered as he opened the door to their room. "She may have been young but if she's going to lead an ensemble then she should work harder."
"She showed promise," Minerva argued, defending the young violinist.
"Come now, Minerva," he scoffed. "You noticed as well as I did how she stumbled through the first of the preludes."
"You're being too hard on her," she scolded, allowing him to take her jacket. "The first of the preludes was indeed a little out of pace but she warmed up, she more than caught up with her fellow players."
"Hardly," he mumbled. "Give me that," he indicated to her bag and she passed it to him along with her wand. "The point is, the Leader should be the best of the group. The ensemble depend on her and they were not fully supported by her tonight."
Minerva slipped off her high heels as he made his way toward her. "You're being too hard on her, Severus," she said again. He smirked at her as he bent his head to her neck and placed kisses along her collarbone. "They were all only in their twenties. They are still in training." She let out a gasp when his tongue darted out against her pulse.
"It's no excuse," he said as his hands reached up her back to unzip her dress. "All the guests were paying to attend tonight. If you are going to charge, you should at least have the decency to be up to scratch. She wasn't." As he began to push her dress off her shoulder he smirked at her. "You should wear Slytherin colours more often," he nuzzled her neck again and she laughed.
"I had a feeling you might like it," she said in his ear, admitting that she had chosen the dress especially for him. He murmured his appreciation against her skin as he made his way down her to her breasts, continuing to pull her dress down as he went.
It was a very rare occasion that she didn't wear a slip under her dress but with the style of the garment, it didn't allow for anything more than her underwear. At that thought, she suddenly realised that his hands were edging up her back and she was wearing nothing to hide her scars.
"Wait," she gasped, struggling against him. "Stop."
He did immediately, his hands dropping away from her and he stepped back. "What is it?"
"I..." she suddenly felt ridiculous and felt herself blush. She brought her arms around herself, glad that she was at least wearing a bra. Their eyes met but she wasn't sure what to say to him.
Severus observed her for a moment and then leaned forward to kiss her cheek. She watched him shrug out of his waistcoat and then begin to unfasten his shirt. She smiled at him when he helped her slip on his shirt. "Better?"
Touched, and a little overwhelmed, she stepped closer and brought his face to hers where she kissed him with everything she had. She felt him silently laugh against her; his body trembled just a touch. Now that his chest was bare she wanted to feel more of him. It had been too long since she'd felt his skin flush against hers. She quickly helped him out of his clothes and more than happily pushed her dress off her hips and kicked it away. Their playful mood had returned and soon they were tumbling onto the bed. His hands reached for her pants and she lifted her hips to make it easier for him to peel them off.
*Knock, knock, knock*
They both froze. Severus frowned and looked over at the door while Minerva sat up, forcing him to step away from her. She wrapped his shirt around her body and pushed him with her foot, nodding toward the door. He glared at her.
"Who is it?" She called, smirking at him.
"Room service," a male voice replied from the other side of the door. Minerva rolled her eyes and this time kicked Severus as she indicated for him to answer the door. He playfully smacked her thigh in return for the kick and headed for the door. Before he opened it, he picked up his wand and quickly transfigured the shirt she was wearing and his jacket into dressing gowns, which he slipped on before opening the door.
Minerva watched a young man wheel a trolley into their room with a bright smile. She glanced toward Severus who was glaring at him. "We ordered this for 10pm," he snapped. The bright smile on the young man's face faltered slightly as he checked his watched.
"It is 10pm sir," he said, glancing toward her hesitantly. Minerva smiled at him and stood up from the bed.
"Thank you," she said to him, retrieving some muggle money from her purse and handing it to the man. He smiled at her, obviously thrilled with her generous tip.
"No, thank you," the man said, nodding his head to her before leaving the room quickly.
Minerva made her way toward the trolley and she could feel her lovers eyes on her back. "This is your fault," he said and she smirked as she helped herself to the food he had ordered for them. "You wasted the good part of an hour arguing about that dreadful violinist."
"And now you're wasting even more time by complaining," she said, turning to look at him while biting down seductively on a strawberry.
Severus narrowed his eyes at her. "You can be evil sometimes," he moved to the trolley. "Do you know that?"
"Admit it," she leaned into him and pressed a kiss behind his ear. "You think it's sexy," she whispered in his ear, teasing his lobe with her teeth. She felt his body tense as he prepared to grab hold of her but she was too quick for him. She turned out of his reach, her plate of food carefully balanced in one hand as she made her way to the bed. She smirked at the growl she heard behind her.
She sat down on the bed, resting against the headboard while she watched Severus put food on his plate. She balanced her plate on a pillow in front of her and started to make her way through her food, she hadn't realise just how hungry she was. Finally, Severus made his way to her. He lay on his side at the end of the bed, his head propped up one hand while the other picked at the food he'd placed on the bed in front of him.
Minerva studied him while they ate in silence. She always enjoyed these moments with him but as she watched him, she couldn't help but think back to what they were like when he first started teaching at the school. She thought about that first day when she'd taken him to his quarters, when she'd asked him why he returned to the school. He had been a puzzle to her and there had been so many questions that she had kept to herself. Before she could stop herself, one of those questions left her mouth.
"Why did you turn to You-Know-Who?"
Severus froze, his hand halfway to his mouth when he'd stopped. His eyes narrowed and Minerva wondered if had crossed a line with him. She wished she could take the question back. "Why do you wish to know?" He asked after a while.
Minerva looked down at her food, wondering once again why she'd had to bring this up now. "I don't know," she said. "I just..." She didn't really know what to say to him.
"You just what?" He asked, his tone a little clipped.
She paused, her eyes watching for any signs that he was angry with her. When she found none, she continued. "It's something I wanted to ask you when you first arrived at the school last year and I..." she shrugged. "I guess I just want to know more about you."
Severus frowned at her. "You know me," he said. "There is nothing else to discover."
Minerva nodded as he went back to his food and she sighed. "I'm sorry," she said, feeling guilty for prying.
"What for?" he frowned.
"For pushing you," she gave him a weak smile.
"You didn't," he said. "You have questions..." he sighed. "I just do not want my answers to change your opinion of me."
It was Minerva's turn to frown. "I don't see why it would."
He nodded, his eyes falling to his plate. "I will answer your questions," he looked back up at her. Minerva smiled when their eyes met and she hoped he could see how thankful she was for the olive branch he was extending to her. Before she could speak, he lifted his hand to stop her. "But this doesn't mean I will answer all of them..."
Minerva laughed gently. "I firmly believe that only the power of Veritaserum would make you answer a question against your will."
"I should have tested my food and drink first," he mumbled with a dry tone but she could see the smile in his eyes. "Get on with it then."
Minerva took a deep breath before beginning. "Why did you become one of his followers?" She couldn't help but feel a little excited by the conversation that lay ahead of them. He had given her insight into aspects of his life but never had he allowed her to explore so freely and on her terms.
"Because I believed in what he stood for."
The words felt heavy on her mind. Any feeling of excitement vanished and she found herself staring at him, unable to fully comprehend what he'd said. "You... believed in it?" She asked, watching with astonishment as he shrugged.
"I believe that in some of his cruelties there was some sense; he believed that it was the fault of muggles that our numbers depleted." He spoke with no emotion to his voice. It was all fact, as though he were reciting words from a page. It somewhat lessened the sickly feeling in her stomach. "His way of resolving that was to fight back, to eliminate the competition... but I believe he went too far."
Minerva felt something snap in her and she felt herself coming back, no longer allowing his words to throw her off kilter. "He went too far?" She asked, her voice holding a hard edge to it. She knew this conversation would be difficult and she knew she would discover some of the darker sides of her friend but she hadn't anticipated that it would affect her as much as it had so far. "What was too far? Killing innocent children..."
"They burned us at the stake Minerva," he said angrily. He sat up and turned away from her slightly, his eyes looking down at his hands. "They drowned and hanged us. Tied our children up and stuffed them into bags ready to be thrown into a river with rocks tied to them." He lifted his eyes back to hers. "Why should we show them mercy when they have shown us none in return? Even now, in our own lifetime, they would cut us open, run tests on us, think up ways to use our gifts against us and aid them in war. Muggles are a selfish race, they care for nothing but their own causes."
"They have their faults just like we do," she argued back. "Yes, they go to war over religion and territory, they are destroying their home in the name of advancement and some have a sense of superiority over the world despite it not belonging to them... but at the heart of it, they are beautiful."
Severus sneered at her. "How?"
"We are more alike than you think," she said, watching him closely. "We have the same need to protect and care for our loved ones. They are curious beings; adventurers and inventors. They are artists, Severus, you have seen it yourself. And what's more over is that I found more love and safety in a muggle family than in my own pureblood lineage. I believe you might have too..."
She watched Severus turn away again, his brow creasing with thought. "You make a good argument," he shrugged.
Minerva put both of their plates on the bedside table and then moved across the bed to sit beside him. "Do you still believe in what he advocated to be right?" she asked after a moment.
Severus was still for a while. Silent. Minerva wondered if this was the end of their conversation, if perhaps this was his way of telling her he'd had enough. "No..." he said quietly. "I would not be here if I hadn't thought he'd gone too far."
Minerva took a few slow breaths trying to keep her next question at bay but she knew it was only a matter of time. She had never been one to hold her tongue. "What did it take for you to realise what a monster he was?" Her sarcasm wasn't fair, she knew it but when she glanced toward Severus, he didn't seem at all bothered by it.
"You have to realise Minerva," he glanced at her momentarily before looking back down at his hands. "For a boy who hated the world and was equally hated by the world in return, a man offering power and revenge was a keen option. I had no other friends but the ones that led me to him..." he let out a deep sigh and looked up at her. This time, his eyes settled on her and stayed. "I had no allegiance to the muggle world. My earliest experience of a muggle was my father and from him I learned only hatred and regret. Is it any wonder I turned out the way I did?"
"Why did you return to us?" It was an old question but still one that she felt bound to ask. She knew deep down that he wasn't going to answer it.
"I cannot say," he said quietly.
Minerva could almost see the walls he was rebuilding behind his eyes. "You said you'd answer my questions," she said softly, her shoulder bumping gently into his.
Severus sighed and shook his head. "Not this," he said after a moment. "Not now. Please. I will answer your other questions but please... please respect my wishes on this."
The look in his eyes pulled at her heart and she reached out for him, touching his face in a loving caress. "I can see that whatever it is, is hard for you to talk about but perhaps sharing your burden might help."
Severus caught her hands in his own and pressed a kiss to the palms of each one. "So it might," he said. "One day I will tell you, when I'm ready. But until then, I implore you to never speak of it again."
"Of course," she nodded at his request, she would never push him. She knew more than anyone the importance of space. She just hoped that he would confide in her one day, not to satisfy her curiosity but to ease his pain. "At least tell me that I should not be worried."
She watched as Severus gave her a half smile, not quite a sneer but she understood what many would not. He was touched by her concern. "It's nothing for you to lose sleep over," he pressed a kiss to her forehead and made his way back to the food cart where he poured wine into two glasses.
Minerva shifted to the bottom of the bed and watched him for a moment. "Have you ever thought about marriage?" She paused as soon as the words were out of her mouth, wondering just what exactly had gotten into her to make her so forward in her questioning.
When Severus turned to look at her, there was a look of disgust on his face that surprised her. "You ask difficult questions," he said as he made his way back to the bed.
"And you are a master at avoiding them," she smiled up at him as he handed her a glass of wine. He moved onto the bed, his back resting against the headboard and held his hand out for her. She took it and carefully made her way toward him, trying not to spill her wine. When she was close enough he pulled her down in front of him and guided her to lean back against his chest. She settled into him, her head resting on his shoulder as his free arm circled her waist. He lightly tapped his glass against hers and whispered cheers in her ear before they both sipped the fragrant alcohol.
"I've never wished to inflict such a punishment on anyone as to bind them to me," he said against her hair, going back to her question.
Minerva scoffed. "A coward's answer," she teased.
She felt Severus' lips twitch against her cheek and she knew he was smirking. The free hand that lay across her waist began to wander toward the opening of her robe where it flirted with the edge. "Perhaps but my answer is still true." He took a sip from his wine. "What woman would want me?"
Minerva rolled her eyes and leaned her head back to look up at him. "You are more desirable than you think."
Severus placed their glasses on the bedside table and wrapped his other arm around her too. "If we had met under different circumstances, I was not your former student, I was not an ex-Death Eater, would you want me?" His face was serious and for a moment, Minerva hesitated.
"I thought it was I that was asking the questions," she tried to lighten the mood.
Severus smirked and she felt one of his hands slip under her robe. Her stomach muscles jumped at the contact, the warmth of his hand burning against her naked flesh. "A cowards answer," his breath tickled her ear and she smiled. She tilted her head to once again look up at his face and when their eyes met, she caught sight of what he had become so good at hiding; the warmth and affection he felt for her.
"Yes," she said quietly.
Severus sneered. "A Gryffindor admitting to cowardice?"
She smirked. "Absolutely not," she said. "I was answering your question." He froze at that and she couldn't help the tiny flutter of smugness knowing she'd thrown him off his game. Now that she was back in control, she continued with her questions. "Did you turn out as you hoped when you were a child?"
Severus took a moment to consider her question before answering. She felt his hand move up over her ribcage until it stopped at the edge of her bra. His thumb traced the underwire and she felt the familiar aching need beginning in the pit of her stomach. "In some ways I did," he said eventually. "I wanted to distance myself from my father; I certainly did that. I strove to excel in my studies; I went beyond that. I wanted to prove to everyone that they were wrong about me... I suppose however you look at it, I managed to do that too."
"Is that a yes?"
Severus sighed. "Does anyone grow up to be what they want as a child?"
"I think some do," she said.
"Did you?" he asked, whispering something afterward that she didn't quite catch. It wasn't until she felt her bra loosen that she realised what he'd done. He helped her remove the straps from under her robe and she watched the bra hit the wall and fall to the ground. She laughed softly. "So?" He asked as both hands began to wander under her robe again.
"There was a moment when I thought I had it but..." she stopped when she felt his hands graze the underside of her breasts. She didn't want to ruin the mood. "Well... you know what happened."
He nodded against her neck, his lips grazing the delicate skin there. She shivered against him. "Despite that, are you happy?"
"Very," she said without hesitation. The thumb on one of his hands grazed her nipple.
"Are you?" He asked.
"I wouldn't lie to you Severus," she said, arching her back, silently pleading him to give her more. "Are you?
"What?" He cupped his entire hand over her breast.
"Happy."
He shrugged. "I have never been happy," he replied as he began to massage her breast firmly. "But all things considered, I am content."
"Is that enough?" She turned to look at him, her hand reaching up to touch his lips.
"It's more than I ever expected," he kissed her fingertips.
While she was enjoying what his skilful hands were doing to her sensitive flesh, she put her hands on his to stop him. "What happened to make you so... you're outlook on your life..." she paused to collect her thoughts. "It is as though you truly believe that you don't deserve to be here. That you don't deserve your life."
Severus shook his head. "Nothing happened," he said. "It's just the way I am. I always have been."
"I don't believe that."
"Look at you; you had a hard upbringing too. The basics were not so dissimilar from my own circumstances. The loving parent was taken away too early. We turned out very differently. You are warm, a caring individual but you are strong. Your upbringing gave you the tools to be an extraordinary woman... but you already had that in you. I am your opposite. When we look at each other, we can see what might have become had just one tiny thing shifted."
Minerva frowned, not sure she understood him correctly. "You speak as if we don't have control of our own paths."
"I think that no matter the choices we make, our ends will still be the same."
"Now you speak of destiny," she was surprised to hear this from him.
He shrugged and freed his hands from her own, only to return to massaging her breasts. This time she allowed him. "Call it what you will."
"I never would have taken you as the kind," she smiled at him and he playfully pinched her nipple harder than he normally would.
"What do you think?"
"I believe we must take charge of our lives. Nothing will happen to you unless you go out and find it. Life would be terribly boring if it could only go one way," she said, closing her eyes and leaning her forehead against his chin.
"I believe we are all pawns in some grand design. None of us matter, it's all about the end result."
Minerva opened her eyes and frowned. "Which is?"
Severus shook his head, indicating that he had no answer for that. "What are prophecies then if not a glimpse of destiny?" His hands suddenly left her breasts and her robe.
Minerva sat up and turned to face him, her eyes narrowing on him. "You know how I feel about prophecies," she said in a dismissive way. "Seeing into the future has never done anyone any good but if there was one out there about me, I would take it as a warning that a choice must be made. A prophecy is a riddle to be interpreted by the listener. Should they ignore the warning or act upon it? Each choice will have a different outcome but it is up to the listener to decide upon what to do. There is no right or wrong in the interpretation, only the actions that follow."
Minerva watched Severus and she could see that he was thinking hard over what she'd said. Something flashed in his eyes, so fleeting she wondered if she'd imagined it. She reached a hand to his cheek and brushed her fingers against him gently until he looked up at her.
"Next question," he mumbled.
"This isn't an interrogation," she smirked and he scoffed at her.
"Feels like it."
"Would you like to stop?" She asked, allowing him to pull her forward until their noses touched.
"You wouldn't," he said, reaching into her robe and cupping her breasts.
"I would if you asked," she gave him a flirtatious smile. "I wouldn't think any less of you if you backed out..."
He scoffed loudly and pinched a nipple as if to punish her for what she'd said. "I am not backing out," he said, leaning forward until his lips grazed hers. "But I have paid for this room and it would be a shame to waste it..." he pressed his lips against hers and Minerva opened her mouth to him, enjoying the way his tongue ran under her top lip.
"Then let us postpone this conversation for a time when we might be in need of a much needed distraction," she ran her hands up his chest and circled his neck as she kissed him.
"That's the best suggestion you've had all night," he said, ripping open her robe and pushing her down onto the bed. He crawled on top of her, his lips devouring her own.
Minerva felt her stomach tighten at the thought of what was to come. As soon as his lips sought her throat, she let out a guttural sound and Severus replied with his own as he ground himself into her. As he began to move across her body, pressing open mouthed kisses across her breasts and rib cage, she cursed herself again for her need to put rules in place when they were at school. She laughed to herself but Severus must have felt it because he stopped and looked up at her.
"I've missed this," she said, looking down at him.
"Me too," he smirked before going back to pressing kisses across her stomach.
His fingers hooked into her pants and he pulled them off quickly. She reached for him, hoping to feel him inside her but he shook his head. She watched in astonishment as he lowered himself between her legs and ran his tongue through her wetness. She gasped and fell back against the mattress. She couldn't remember the last time someone had done this to her. Severus' tongue was as skilled as his hands and he soon had her convulsing underneath him. She panted against the bed, relishing the feeling of his lips kissing their way back up her body.
They had kissed awhile, touching and teasing each other until Severus pulled her on top of him and she sank down on him. They gasped at the feeling and Severus wrapped his arms around her waist, as she lay across him. He thrust up into her hard and fast and she buried her face in his neck as she cried out his name.
Afterward Minerva lay on her stomach, her head resting on her arms. Severus knelt between her legs, massaging her back and legs, lingering over her arse every time he passed it. These were the moments she missed the most. She'd missed the moments when they didn't need to talk, missed his presence and his quiet solitude. She missed how relaxed she felt when it was just the two of them. She glanced back at him over her shoulder, his eyes were fixed on what he was doing but he looked at her when he felt her shift. He smirked and lifted onto his arms, moulding his body to hers as he laid on top of her, pressing her into the mattress. He kissed her neck and she smiled.
"Are you hungry?" He asked, grinding his sex against her arse. She chuckled softly.
"Not for food," she said, surprising herself at her boldness. Severus seemed to like it though and he easily slipped into her from behind. This new position intensified the feeling of his length pushing into her, stretching her. He hissed into her ear and bit down on her lobe. "Good?" She received a grunt in reply and she smirked.
This position made sex different to what she'd experienced before. He had lifted up on his elbows for better leverage but she was still being pressed into the mattress with every thrust. She couldn't move other than arching her back, allowing him to reach deeper into her. She couldn't shift enough to reach behind her to hold onto him or turn her head so that she could kiss him. He was in complete control and it should have frightened her, perhaps with another lover it might. But not him. Not even when he hooked an arm around her neck, putting pressure against her throat. She knew he wouldn't hurt her, she trusted him.
Her orgasm had been explosive and she wondered if Severus had had the forethought to sound proof the room - she knew she hadn't. She expected him to continue until he found his own release but instead he stopped and pressed a kiss between her shoulder blades. She felt him kneel up between her legs and his hands were on her waist, encouraging her to kneel up too. Her arms felt dead, the blood rushing back to her hands and making them tingle. Her arms gave way and she laughed, causing Severus to lift her so that she was straddling his knees backwards. Her back slid against his sweaty chest as he wrapped his arms around her and began to massage her breasts as he slowly began to thrust into her again.
With her new found freedom, Minerva began to lift with him, ignoring the ache in her thighs at the sudden and unusual exercise. She lifted an arm around his neck, twisting her body enough to kiss him as he continued to thrust hard and fast.
She had never had a lover like him, a lover that she felt a deep connection with. In some ways it frightened her. It was not what she had with Bertie but it was more than she'd ever had with anyone after him.
With their bodies sated and exhausted, Severus devoured the last of the food after she had eaten her fill and then they'd climbed back into bed.
"Thank you for tonight," she said, laying opposite him. He shrugged.
"I'm a selfish person Minerva," he yawned. "I did this only for myself. If you got some enjoyment out of it then I'm glad." He didn't fool her, he never did anymore. She moved closer to him and as if to prove her right, she felt his arm lift over her waist and pull her into him. She smiled against him and he scoffed. "Sleep," he mumbled against her hair.
"Yes," she said as she lifted her own arm over his hips. "Good night."
He pressed a kiss to her hair. "Good night."
Sooooo... what did you think? I hope you enjoyed it and I hope to have another chapter out very very soon. Thanks again everyone! xxx