"Are you going somewhere?" My dad asks me as I'm coming down the stairs, purse in my hand.

"Yeah, my friend's BBQ," I tell him, passing by and grabbing my keys off the tray on the table against the wall in the foyer.

He stood there, looking a bit disappointed by my answer.

I adjusted my purse a bit and then took my phone out of my bag to make sure I didn't have any text messages before I drove. I went to open the door and then felt a little bad that I didn't even ask for permission or anything, so I turn around and ask, "can I go?"

"You can go," he says, "but I was hoping you could come to a birthday party with me."

"A birthday party?"

"Madeline's. Please. It's really important to me."

I could tell it was. I see it in his eyes that he really wants me to go to his girlfriend's daughters birthday and make an effort with her. And I never want to intentionally make my dad mad or sad or anything, but ugh, it's hard. She can never replace my mom. It just feels like she is. It feels like she's coming in here and taking her place and making my dad love her and I never thought it would be possible for him to love another woman other than my mom.

But since it seems important to him, I agree to go. "Maybe for an hour."

"That's fine," he smiles, "that's more than I could ask for. Your sister is meeting us there for a bit as well."

"Okay," is all I say before making my way to the living room to wait for him to go.

And twenty minutes later when he's ready, we make our way out the door and to his girlfriend's house. Actually, it wasn't her house. It was her friend's house or something, I don't know. Madeline's godmother. She was hosting the party for her or something like that. I wasn't really paying attention to what my dad was saying. I only really paid attention to the address.

It was a short 10 minute drive and when we got there, I couldn't believe the house we were at.

GORGEOUS. It was gorgeous.

My dream house, for sure. I mean, I love my house. But it's too European for my liking. My mom loved that, though. I'm more traditional. I want a white picket fence and all that shit. And this house, this house was my dream house. So traditional. Gated community. Big and cozy. Everything I want in a home.

"Girls," my dad turns to my sister and I before we enter the house, "please just be present. That's all I really ask."

"Okay," we both say in unison even though we both know we're going to be on our phones probably the whole entire time we're here.

I walk in and take it all in. It's even more beautiful from the inside. Seriously, it's my dream home and all I really want to know right now is who lives here and who designed it because I want to hire them for my future home.

And then we see Monica and she greets us as usual. Overly enthused and a big smile on her face.

My God, it comes off SO fake. Like she's trying. And I get it could be a nervous thing, but it just screams fake to me.

"Come eat, there's tons of food, I'm so happy you guys could make it," she tells us all as she's leading us to the back, "Maddie is in the jumper, but once she's out, I'd love for you guys to meet her."

"Okay," my sister tells her, smiling, like the nice girl she is. She's definitely a little more accepting of this. But I could tell she's on my side as well.

We walk out to the backyard and it's so big and beautiful and yep, I'm sucked into this house yet again. I want it. I want it soooo bad.

She leads us to a table and tells us to take a seat and she'll bring us all drinks.

And once she walks away, I take a look around at everything and everyone here. There's a cute guy sitting at a couple tables away. There's a jumper that's occupied by kids. There are streamers and balloons everyone and the party is Frozen themed. Cute. Typical. But it is a four year old's birthday, after all.

Monica comes back with the water I requested, but then I realized I wanted a soda so I got up to get one.

And while I was grabbing one and a cup from one of the tables, I felt someone hug at my shirt a bit. Or tap me, I'm not really sure.

I turn around and see the cutest little girl EVER standing there, a small smile on her face, and a birthday crown on. She's seriously the cutest girl I've EVER seen in my life. Light brown hair and these big hazel eyes.

Then it clicks and I realize who this is. This is Maddie. The birthday girl. Monica's daughter.

"Yes?" I ask her, giving her a small smile.

"Can you give me a cup please?" her voice is even cute, "I just jumped for so long and am so thirsty! I need water."

I laughed and turned around and got her a cup, but then realized that there was a jar of iced water there for people to drink and she obviously couldn't reach it. So I turned back around and looked down at this little cutie, "do you want me to pour you some?"

She nods, "please. I don't think I can reach. I can't find my mommy."

"I can give you some, don't worry," I tell her and then turn around and fill this pink cup up with some water and give it to her.

She stands there and chugs it all and then gives it back to me, like she wants me to get rid of it or hold onto it or something, I don't really know. "I'm five years old today! What's your name? I'm Maddie. Do you like Frozen? I love Frozen so much that I asked my mommy if I could have a Frozen party!"

Oh my gosh, this girl was SO cute. I couldn't get over it. "I do like Frozen, actually. Who's your favorite, Anna or Elsa?"

"Hmm," she thinks about it as she giggles and jumps around a bit, "Anna! She's pretty!"

"She is pretty. And she has a good voice."

Madeline giggles and then asks if I could give her some more water so I do.

And then I turn around, watch her drink some more water and then take the cup from her. "My name's Gabriella. I'm a friend of your mommy's. Happy birthday. How do you like being five, is it better than four?"

"So much better!" she's jumping around being all cute, "I get to go to kindergarten which I'm super excited for because I love learning!"

"You do!? That's great, I..." I didn't even finish my sentence because Maddie ran off squealing about something.

I looked at where she was going and she was running into the arms of Troy. Troy. The guy who was at my house the other day. The hot guy. The freaking hot guy was here. And for a moment, I couldn't breathe. I forgot how beautiful and hot he was.

And Madeline was now in his arms and he was smiling at her and laughing as he hugged and kissed her cheeked and gave her a present.

"Oh my gosh, I love it already," she exclaimed before coming back over to where I was standing because I was next to the present table as well.

She placed it on the table, gave Troy another hug and then ran off.

I locked eyes with Troy, but I didn't really say anything because what do I say? Oh hi. What's up? No. We're nothing. We're not friends. I've met him once so this is a bit awkward. Instead, I just grabbed a cup like I originally had planned and turn around to walk back to the table I was at.

But he kind of stopped me. Stood in front of me and smiled. "Hey... Gabriella?"

"Yeah, hey." Uh, I'm surprised he remembered my name.

"Are you..." I think he was trying to find his words, trying to choose them wisely, "did you come with your dad?

"Um, yeah," my God, he's more beautiful today than he was last week at my party. Fuuuck. "Yeah, last minute thing."

He laughed and scratched the back of his neck and looked out to all the people for a moment. And then he looked back at me and gave me a smile, "you're actually in my house, so, uh, welcome..."

What. The. Fuck. This was his house? I WANT IT. I'm sooo jealous. "Oh. Um. Well, thank you. I, uh, I should probably get back to my dad."

I really didn't know what to say to him, what to talk about or anything. It's awkward. It's awkward that I'm here when I don't care for Monica. When I'm not particularly fond of them dating. So like, what the fuck. I just kind of want to get out of here. I want to go to my friends and hang out with all of them.

My sister's sitting with my dad and some lady and I have no idea who she is, but I'm not looking forward to meeting her.

"Gabriella," my dad says as soon as I approach the table.

"Yes?"

"This is Anna, Monica's sister."

Fucccck. It's bad enough I know Monica. I don't want to know her sister, too. But since Anna has not had any impact- negative or positive- on my family whatsoever, I smile at her, a genuine smile as I take a seat at the table. "Nice to meet you."

Anna smiled back. "Nice to meet you as well. Heard you just graduated high school."

"Yep," I say, taking a sip of my sprite, "I'm off to college now."

"Well, congratulations, I'm sure you're so excited. College was the best time of my life," she says and you know what? She seems nice. Genuinely nice. But it's so hard for me to be on board with everything going on. "Do you have any idea what you want to study yet?"

I wanna run my own business, whatever that is. "I'm leaning towards business. Not exactly sure what I want to do in life just yet."

She nods, looking like she understands. "Well, you still have plenty of time."

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Anna ends up talking to us for close to 20 minutes and she's actually cool. I like her. She's 2 years older than Monica and has three kids. A 10 year old, an 8 year old and a 5 year old. And a husband she adores who is currently across the yard talking to some people, but she assures us we'll meet him soon.

But then her 5 year old comes over and needs help with something, so she gets up and tells us she'll be back shortly.

And now it's just the Montez's now, sitting at this table. My sister was on her phone, my dad was scanning the place, probably for his beloved Monica and that's making me sick. And I was just counting down the minutes until I could leave.

"Gabriella, can I introduce you to someone?"

"What?" I look over at Monica who's now standing at our table, "who?"

She looks at my dad and then back at me and pushes some hair back behind her ear, like she's nervous or scared of me. I'm not really sure, but I can be pretty intimidating, I'll give her that. "A friend. She works at UCLA and I just thought she could tell you about it if you're interested."

I'm not. I'm not interested at all.

"Oh, isn't that what orientation's for?" I ask her in the least bitchiest way I possibly could.

"Gabriella," my dad basically scolds, "you should go. I know you have some questions. Weren't you just wondering the other day about some club?"

Yes, but I'm on freaking summer vacation. The last thing I want to do right now is concern myself with school. And I'm leaving in less than 20 minutes. I'm not going to spend it talking to someone who works there. No thank you. I want to stay right here and do absolutely nothing.

I give Monica the most genuine smile I could. "Thank you, but I don't really have anything to ask right now."

"Okay," she says, looking a bit disappointed.

But I shook it off, trying not to let her make me feel bad and turn to my sister.

My dad and Monica took off and it was just the two of us sitting there now. And I really, really just wanted to leave now.

"What are you doing today?"

"I'm going to dinner with Sean and his family and then Kate is having a bonfire out in Malibu," Jess tells me, putting her phone down on the table, "do you wanna go? Lexie and all them are going. Or do you have plans?"

My sister and I were so close in age, and only a school year apart from each other, so we often hung out with the same people. But still, she had her friends and I had mine and it was a nice balance. I loved that we were so close in age and everyone around us got along.

But today, I was just going to hang out with my group of friends and relax. I don't feel like driving all the way to Malibu to get sand all over my car.

"Jordan's having a BBQ which will probably lead to a night of just hang out around the fire."

"Oh okay," she says, "when can we leave this place?"

I laugh. My dad thinks Jessica is way more open to Monica and maybe she is, I don't care to talk about it, but I know she doesn't want to be here at all. And that she probably doesn't want my dad dating anyone. We're sisters. We're on the same page. I know it.

My dad is across the yard talking to some people and since he decided to leave us here, I think it's time we both left as well.

"Let's just go, who cares."

"Gabs, that's rude, isn't it?" It doesn't look like she's down with it. "We can't."

"Well, I am," I get up and she has no other choice than to follow me.

So she does. We walk through these tables, people have no idea who we are and then we slip inside go leave. But when I turn back to make sure she's following me out of this house, she's nowhere be found. So I stop, take a couple steps back and see her talking to my dad and Monica.

Fucccck. Jessica. You fucking screwed me on this one.

Whatever, I'm halfway out. I'm not going to go backwards. I don't care if my dad gets mad at me.

So I make my way to the front and of course, clumsy Gabriella bumps into someone.

"Whoa," he says, holding onto my forearms.

It's Troy. Of course it is. Of course I ran into this gorgeous guy. And of course he's going to ask where I'm going and then I'm going to seem like such a bitch for leaving a party I only arrived to, like 40 minutes ago, but I just couldn't help it. I didn't want to be here. I wanted to be with my friends and I wanted to drink some beers and have fun with them. People I know. And people I like.

He's standing there, just giving me this small smile. And I feel a little uncomfortable. "Um, sorry, I didn't..."

"You leaving?"

"Yes," I say, not caring anymore. I don't care if he knows I don't want to be here. Like, why should I care what he thinks? He's just a friend to Monica or whatever. "I have some things to do."

"Well, I shouldn't keep you then," he says, taking a step to the side, "don't forget your goody bag."

There were goody bags in a cute little basket on the way for you to grab. And I couldn't help, but smile and laugh at that. He was patronizing me, I think. But whatever. He has to know that I wouldn't be Monica's biggest would. Monica even knows. Duh. So I didn't care.

I shook my head and gave him a laugh, "thank you so much.

And with that, I was out.

Time to party for real. With my actual friends.

"Do you honestly not care that Parker and Valerie were hooking up last night?"

"No," I tell Tori as I'm taking off the shoes I'm trying at Barney's. "I honestly do not care."

It looks like she doesn't believe me which is crazy. Victoria Baker has been one of my best friends since elementary school. She should actually know that this whole thing with Parker is purely physical and just a good distraction every once in a while. There's nothing more to it than that.

She shakes her head and crosses her arms. "I get it. But I don't know, I guess because I could never do this whole no strings attached game that I don't think anyone else can either."

"I can," I get up and put the shoe back on display, "and I know he's doing it to fuck with me which makes it roll off my shoulders even more."

"Exactly! You know he has actual feelings for you so why don't you care? Why haven't you developed any?"

"Seriously, Tor?" I laugh, browsing around for more shoes. "Parker will cheat on me the minute he can. No way. That right there makes me not have any feelings for him. No. I know what being in a relationship with him would be like so honestly, hooking up with him here and there is more than enough"

Victoria shakes her head and looks around for some shoes, too.

I find the cutest booties that I just HAVE to get. "They better have these in my size."

"I seriously just got those two days ago."

"What?" I turn to her, "seriously? why didn't you tell me?!"

"Oh, I'm sorry, am I supposed to tell you about every purchase I make?" she laughs, picking up a Chanel flat that looks really cute.

I give her a "duh" face and then take my phone out of my bag because it was vibrating. "Yes, because we're the same shoe size." It was just a text message from my sister. "And what if I wasn't with you when I got them? Total waste of money because I can just borrow from you."

She laughed and took off her current flat to try on the Chanel one. "You're right, my queen. So sorry."

There's nothing I love more in this world than shoe shopping. And my friends.

Shoes are the best thing in life.

And friends are a close second. Just kidding. Friends come first.

My three best friends in the whole wide world- Sophia Adams, Victoria Baker, and Christine Wallis have been unbelievable this past year. They were there whenever I needed them. When I wanted to just cry and vent about everything in my life, they were there. When I wanted to go shoe shopping, they were there to go with me. When I wanted to just get in my car and drive until I left California, they were there to STOP me from doing it.

I seriously would not have gotten out of bed if it weren't for these girls. Specifically Tori, who came into my room one day and gave me a long talk and made me get out of bed,put some fresh clothes on and go outside into the world and make me realize that life goes on.

My mom would never want me to be sad all my life, but it's inevitable, it really is.

But she wants me happy.

And that's what my friends are here to do.

"So, how's it going with your dad's girlfriend?" Tori asks me as we're walking to my car after purchasing no shoes, sadly.

"I know you guys care, but it's really the last thing I care to talk about," I tell her, unlocking my car and getting inside before I continue to speak, "I don't really know her, nor do I really care to know her right now. If it gets serious, maybe, sure. But right now, she's just someone my dad has around so he probably doesn't think about my mom all day. At least that's what I'm telling myself because it'd be better than him having her because he actually wants to have her and has forgotten all about my mom and all the wonderful years that they've shared."

Tori buckled up and put her bag on the ground and gave me a frown. "Don't say shit like that, Gabs. I'm completely, one hundred percent behind you and will back you up forever, but you honestly don't know how it is for your dad."

Ughhhhh. Great. Here we go. "No, but I never would have expected him to get a fucking girlfriend a year and a half later, Tor. Way too soon."

"Maybe, yeah, but you and I both know your mom would NEVER ever want him to spend the days by himself."

"He's not by himself, he has us!"

"You know what I mean," she rolls her eyes, "you're not going to live at home forever."

I know. And I get where she's coming from. I have no idea how it was for my dad because my mom isn't his blood. They don't share the same DNA. Maybe it wasn't as hard for him to move on. But I know for a fact, no one is every going to replace her. And no one is ever going to feel like another mom to me.

But it'snot something I care to talk about. "Let's move on, Tor."

"Fine," she laughs, "actually, speaking of Parker a little earlier... my cousin has this super hot friend..."

"No," I already know where this is going.

"Gabriella!" She whines. "Come on. You haven't seriously dated anyone and this guy is hot and cool and he goes to USC, he just finished his freshman year and I hung out with him the other day, we all went for sushi and I just couldn't help, but think about how you two would hit it off."

So what? Who cares if I haven't had a serious boyfriend. I'm 18 years old. I'm young.

And right now, especially since it's summer, I'm not in the mood to start dating and being all serious with someone.

"Let me think about it."

"You really should," she says, buying my lie.

I'm definitely not thinking about it. Unless he is as hot as she says he is, but knowing Tori, she's exaggerating. And also, we have completely different taste. She is not the person I would trust setting me up. No way. But it gets her off my back for the time being.

I crank the volume up to a Adele song and we bust out singing.

And this is what I call a good summer day- shopping with my best friend and listening to Adele on our way to get some food.