Family Ties

Chapter 4: The Good With the Bad

Logan stared out the window at the falling snow. Well, his eyes were looking out the window, but he didn't really see anything. He was lost in a dozen old memories, only half of which he really remembered.

Through Sabe's eyes, he saw his own wedding, Mara's birth, and a couple of birthdays including one when they actually got 100 candles on a cake for him. He remembered telling them there weren't enough candles, which there weren't. He was older than that. By how much he couldn't remember, and neither could his son.

His son. It still made the hairs on the back of his neck bristle. His old enemy, his competition at Weapon X, his personnel addition to the villains against the X-men, was his son. The guy was remembering things, things they used to do together, how they used to act before everything happened. And now Logan was too. Why now, he didn't know, but they both let it come.

Behind him, the library door creaked open and his nose filled with that scent. He closed his eyes, listening to Jean's soft footsteps. The door closed softly before she walked across the room. She was being cautious. He could smell her uncertainty, and it made him want to…to what? Shout? Tell her to leave? Turn around and kiss her? He gripped the ring in his hand. He honestly didn't know, and that's what scared him.

"Logan?" That sweet melody of a voice. It was just like Aria's.

"What is it, kid?" He wasn't trying to be harsh. He was just saying it like it was. Compared to him, she was a kid. He had to remind them both.

She paused, her scent turning to worry. Then she took another step. "How are you holding up?"

He closed his eyes. "You really want to know?" he asked. If she did, he knew he'd actually tell her. Despite how he tried to keep his reputation, she sounded too much like Aria to lie to her.

"I really want to know," she whispered.

A dot of cold touched his cheek, and he realized he was crying. Furious, he wiped the tear away.

"I feel like hell," he muttered, "but I'm gladder than I've been in a long time, too."

She gave a small laugh and settled into a chair behind him. He appreciated that. It meant if he didn't want to look at her, all he had to do was stay put. If he wanted to talk…

He turned around. "I remember Aria," he said. "I remember her scent. Flowers, always flowers, and a sweet mix of herbs. It wasn't a perfume, just the smell of the field around our first house. She used to pick flowers every day." Safe in the memory, he looked up into Jean's eyes. Quickly he looked down again, watching the ring he turned between his fingers.

"She had your eyes," he muttered, "and your voice."

They stayed silent for a long time. He could feel her eyes on him and kept his safely trained on his wedding band.

"Logan," she began, moving to touch his shoulder.

He jerked out of the way, holding up a hand.

"Don't," he said, gritting his teeth. He took a slow breath as she lowered her hand. "If you touch me, I don't know what I'll do," he explained. "God, Jeanie, you sound just like her, look just like her. I can't stand this."

She bit her lip, and he knew she was hurting. A memory flared. Aria crying. His arms wanted to grab her, comfort her while she comforted him, but he couldn't. He didn't even know if he ever really loved her, or only who she reminded him of.

"I'm sorry, Logan," she whispered and got up. She left, passing Sabe quickly as he looked into the room. When she was gone, he spoke.

"That one's confusing," he said, coming in. "Didn't she threaten to throw you in a volcano if you ever thought about her again?"

"She's a telepath," Logan said. "She can't stand seeing people hurtin'."

Sabe didn't speak.

When the silence went on too long, Logan grimaced. "Don't give me that," he said. He waved him in. "Get over here."

Still silent, his son sat next to him.

"I'm glad you're here, all right?" he asked sternly. "It sucks you know more than me, and all the emerging memories are giving me a headache, but I'm taking the good with the bad. I need this. You need this. Mara-"

"Mara is having the time of her life."

Logan smirked as his daughter walked into the room. She looked positively hilarious in Storm's hand-me-downs, but it was the only thing they had for her at the moment. The other girls promised to bring her shopping soon, but they just arrived the day before and things were still crazy just settling in.

Bouncing slightly, Mara dropped to the arm of Sabe's chair and then into his lap. He laughed at his sister's antics, and that made Logan smile.

"I heard you single-handedly broke the beta team's record time," Logan said.

Mara beamed at him. "It was fun," she said. "There were all these lasers and trap doors and spikes and bottomless pits." She stopped and cocked her head when she caught his smirk. "What?"

"Nothin'," he said, holding in a laugh. He ruffled her short black hair then resettled on his couch.

The three of them were quiet for a long time, Sabe holding his sister, Logan watching them both. The room wasn't well lit, the only light coming from the hall and through the window off the snow. The shadows made Mara look completely at peace and a lot more mature. Logan remembered her birthday, and realized she was almost eighteen. His daughter was almost a grown woman, and he's missed it.

Sabe must have caught onto his thought.

"Hey, you all right?" he asked. Mara turned to study Logan's face.

He smirked at them. "Can't fool you, huh?" he asked. They only waited. He grimaced. "I've just missed a lot," he explained. "You've grown up, and I missed it."

Mara got up and sat next to him, wrapping her arms around him. Sabe just looked at him.

"I've missed a lot, too," he whispered.

"Why can't I just show you?" Mara asked. "Vic's been giving you his memories. Why can't I show you both mine?"

"Because you're not as old as I am," Sabe told her. "Too many memory transfers would tax your system." Then he smirked. "Plus, I think Xavier's just using the sessions as an excuse to get in my head," he added. "I think he's trying to decide if I'm going to throw someone out a window or something."

Logan laughed. The funny part was, what Sabe said was probably true. Letting another killer in with his precious students had to make the guy anzy. Oh well, he thought. They're here now, and they're staying.

Mara crossed her arms. "He shouldn't be," she said. "I'd smack you if you did, and you know it. That should be enough of a guarantee that you won't."

Really, it should. With her powers Mara could make even a healer as strong as Sabe pass out for weeks with a single, shadow-powered slap.

"He just doesn't know you well enough yet," Sabe said. "You don't use your powers much, and it's easy for people to underestimate what they can't see."

"You said I wasn't supposed to show off," she reminded him.

"Honey, this place is made for you to use your powers," Logan told her. "Property damage is in the annual budget, and we're isolated enough that anyone Xavier hasn't invited won't see what you're doing."

Her face lit with a devious smile, her eyes flickering with shadows. He smirked, wondering what he had just unleashed. Vaguely he remembered the first time they went camping after her powers came and he had given her free reign. She was in shadow form almost the whole time, barely appearing to eat, and thoroughly beat both his and Sabe's butts at Runaway.

He gave her arm a squeeze. "You're just the same," he teased her.

"Hey," Sabe said, "do you realize what type of weather this is?" His eyes were on the window, gleaming as mischievously as Mara's had just a moment before.

Mara caught his excitement. "Fresh snowfall," she said. "It's-"

"The best time to play Tracker," Logan finished, glad he remembered.

Supporting mirroring smiles, they all rose and headed for the door.