The shores of Loch Ness
11:00 P.M. Eastern Standard Time
(Classified's POV)
Corporal's Defeat in the boxing ring was…embrassing but with Short fuse as the one representing North Wind the penguins have had it. "Okay," Rockgut announced, "it's now time for the swimming part of this competion." Nigel showed up, "Now if your the one who somehow discovers the loch ness monster in the worst way possible…It was nice knowing you. But as Nessie is unreliable with actually showing up…that senerio is highly unlikely." "Yeah tell that to canada's secret sasquatch army," Skipper said. A sasquatch appeared out of the gathered crowd. "You not suppose to tell everyone about that," he said. And then the humans of Finding Bigfoot showed up, "WE found him! We found him! Get the net!" "Ah!" the sasquatch said. "come back here Bigfoot! We just want to film you!" "Um…I ran out of film," a man said. "Great now we have to film another season!" the human left clearly in a bad mood.
I then rolled my eyes at the ridicoulusness of the legend of the loch ness monster…if it hadn't shown up yet then it doesn't exist…And If the host of River monsters say it's a Greenland shark…THEN It's a Greenland shark." "Okay Cupcakes," Rockgut said, "the rules are simple the first animal to swim to the bouy and back…Without needing rescuing…wins!" We all noticed the distance between the shore and the bouy and everybody but the penguins seemed doubtful. But I knew that even with the penguin streamlined bodys and amazing lung capacity they would find that they can't keep up with short fuse….And the puffin…well he will be left in the dust. On the penguin side of things Skipper had elected to go. "Your going down sucker," Short Fuse said. "Ha! Penguins are built for speed and endurance underwater while you stop to catch a breath I will zoom ahead!" Skipper replied. "Not with that blubber," short fuse said. "This Blubber is actually an advantage in the cold water of the loch," Skipper said, "plus I took a dip in a cold Norwegian fiord. And Antartica is in my blood." "Well the Arctic is in mine," Short Fuse said. "considering that the artic is currently melting," Skipper said, "that doesn't bode well for you."
(song suggestion: Chariots of Fire) I had to admit that was a good one as Short Fuse was unable to come up with a comeback. "your as close to the NORTH POLERS as I would like to stand next to," Skipper said. What his problem with North polers…Ah the penguin reindeer cold war over the location of santa's workshop. (Offical rule: all narration must be taken over by one of the competitors past this point and by random selection the narration will now be from…Han's POV) Skipper and that silly seal were streaching out and if it was just between them I would put my money on skipper. And but since it's between the three of us…I still put my money on skipper. But am I going to let that penguin win…What the heck do you think…No!" (Skipper's POV) you not even paying attention nto important stuff! (Hans' POV) I'm the official narrator here! (Skipper's POV) Classified is the least bias out of the nine of us! (Hans' POV) I am the one telling the story here! (Narration Referee's POV) You're both out of here! We're are switching back to Classified's POV! (Skipper's And Han's POV) WHAT!" (Classified's POV) thank you.
Rockgut had placed the three swimmers all the way on the beginning of the rocky beach. He pointed a gun upward and said, "On your marks, get set…" Rockgut fired off the gun and the racers were off. "And their off!" a announced shouted as the three swimmers ran towards the beach. They ran into the icy water and then once they were deep enough they dived in. "And Skipper has taken the lead but short fuse is right behind him" the announcer said very fast, "But it is still anyone's game as we reach the fifty meter mark as Hans the Puffin is still going strong!" Hans the puffin was trying to dive beneath the water to gain speed but his natural bouyance slowed him down. "Come on Skipper! Show Loch ness who's boss!" Kowalski shouted. "Skipper! Skipper! Skipper!" "Go Skipper Go!" Private shouted. "Go! Go! Go! Go!" Rico shouted, "Skipper! Whoo!"
"Hans has fallen behind as Short Fuse has just overtaken Skipper," The announcer said, "Skipper is struggling to keep up as Hans falls even further behind! Short Fuse has officially…I can't believe it Skipper is gaining on short fuse!" "This is a close race," the other announcer said, "Both Skipper and Short Fuse are fine examples of their respective species Penguin and Seal both with their strengths in swimming." "With Skipper's exceptional lung capacity he can go longer streches with out stop for air!" "And the penguin unique shape of their sleek feathered bodies should surge ahead of the competition!" "This is the battle of the evolutionary behemoths as hans the Puffin chances of winning slip even more."
"Skipper and Short fuse are neck and neck! But despite Short fuse's best effects it is for nough as Skipper surges ahead and touches the bouy!" "Skipper has now performed a successful turn around as he is now in a comfortable lead as he the distance between him and short fuse increases." "Short fuse has stopped for air further adding to the gap with this one. Hans the puffin has just reached the halfway point but nobody cares about him anymore. But Short fuse still has a chance to catch up when Skipper finally stop for air." "Skipper is still will far from exhausting his airsupply in his lungs and has always speed passed the halfway point, Hans is now struggling in Skipper's backwash as Skipper quickly reaches the quarter way point!" "Short fuse has just reached the half-way point but seem to be out of breath!" "Short Fuse has stopped completely and has climbed onto the give up platform. "No!" I shouted as Skipper reach the shallows where he could no longer swim. "Skipper has stopped swimming and has begun the made sqamble to the finish line!" Skipper crossed the finished line just as Hans touched the bouy and began his return trip. Skipper grabbed the checkered flag and a bulge sounded singling the end of the race.
Hans jumped out of the water and flew towards the shore glaring at skipper the whole way. "And the Winner is Skipper! Now this is a race we won't forgot anytime soon!" "And not sure who going to win Elitist of the elite but my moneys on team penguin! They going to have a tough day ahead when the capture the flag portion of the competition starts…but I wish them good luck!" "Next Match Skipper," Hans said as he pasted out. Capture the flag? That's a team game Hans would be vastly outmatched. Rockgut appeared on the podium offered the compliments that only he could deliever and then gave direction to the next venue. I turned towards the grandstand and found that the penguins were singing "We are the champions" over the roar of the crowd. "You not the champions yets," I said, 'because the North Wind is coming and your going to get blown away."
(end of chapter four)