I decided to make this chapter one of my personal fears. A huge one. Yeah… I tend to avoid sick people like the plague, especially if they're throwing up. I hate to say it, but once I spent an entire day keeping my brother at arms distance, and not going near our bathroom, because he threw up that morning. Just that MORNING, he was fine the rest of the day. Still. Can't be too careful. O.e

Fear Number Four: Illness

The friends stood around in a hospital room surrounding the bed of a small, very ill redhead. Ferb sat next to him with his hand on the teen's forehead, half comfortingly, half protectively.

"Thanks for coming to see me guys," said Phineas weakly.

"Don't thank us!" said Isabella. "We wanted to! Really!"

"Really?"

"Really really! Right, guys?" Isabella turned to face the other three.

"Absolutely," said Baljeet.

"Eh," said Buford. "I ain't got nothing better to do."

Perry nodded. Now that he was a twenty year old human again, he was able to move back into his old agency dorm. He no longer had to rely on the Flynn-Fletchers to take care of him. In fact, Perry didn't really have to even visit them any more. But that would NOT be the case, if Perry could help it. They were still his family, and he still loved them. Phineas and Ferb were his boys, and Perry had to be there to at least make sure nothing happened to them.

Phineas sighed. "Thanks. But I really hate not being able to do anything all day. It's really boring, and a total waste of time. I mean, think of everything we could've done if I hadn't been stuck here!"

"Maybe you could build a time machine or something," suggested Baljeet.

"Hey, great idea, Baljeet!" said Phineas happily. "Ferb, I know what we're gonna do…" He then erupted into a coughing fit.

"Are you okay, Phineas?!" asked Isabella.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

Ferb squeezed his shoulder gently. "Save your energy."

After Buford got a good look at Ferb, the green-haired Brit was obviously worn out. In actuality, his appearance hadn't changed too much, but with Ferb, the slightest clue of any outward expression was as drastic as anyone else screaming and making a scene. It was doubtful that he had left his brother's at all since he got sick.

"Did they figure out what was wrong?"

"The H2N1 virus," Ferb stated. "Barely got to it in time."

It took awhile for Buford's brain to fully catch up to what that meant, but once it did, his eyes grew extremely wide. He began to tremble like a leaf.

"S… S… S... S… Swine Flu?"

"Yes, Buford. That's what most people call it."

Buford leapt at least ten feet backwards. "SWINE FLU!!"

The others stared as Buford ran out of the room yelling "SWINE FLU!!" over and over.

Baljeet sighed. "Excuse me for a moment."

Meanwhile, Buford was running down the halls of the hospital, screaming hysterically. On his way, he grabbed several people, screaming to them.

"I'm sorry, son, but you can't-"

"AAAAAAHHH!!!"

"Just what-"

"AAAAAAHHHHH!!!!"

"Hey, do you know where the snack machine is?"

"AAAA, that way, AAAAHHH!!!"

He pulled out his cell phone, dialing Candace's number.

"Hello?"

"AAAAHHHH!!!!"

"Buford!"

"Huh?"

Baljeet had caught up to him. "What is wrong with you?!"

Buford gasped. "You were in the room! You're a CARRIER!!"

"What?"

He made a cross shape with his fingers. "Stay back!! The power of Christ repels you!!"

"Buford!"

"What?"

Baljeet sighed. "I am not a carrier. Phineas is no longer contagious."

"… Fo realz?"

"Yes, Buford," answered Baljeet. "Do you think that anyone would let us in if he were?"

"…No." Buford gasped. "But what about Ferb?!"

"…Ferb?"

"He was in there before we got there!!!"

Baljeet sighed. "Ferb is not a carrier, either. He would not come near us if that were the case."

"BUT FERB DOESN'T LIKE ME!!!"

"Why would you think that?"

"Because he never talks to me."

"Buford!"

"Okay, so that was a joke." Buford crossed his arms. "But seriously, the guy's got some kind of vendetta against me or somethin'."

Baljeet sighed. "You are just being paranoid! Buford, I promise. You will NOT get swine flu."

"…You promise?"

"Promise."

"…Promise?"

"FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!"

Buford sighed. "Okay."

The two then began to walk back to their friend's hospital room.

"…Ferb still doesn't like me."

"(sigh) I know, Buford."

SWINE FLU!!!! LOL, just kidding.

While it IS a very serious issue, swine flu is easy and fun to joke about. Back in the fall of '09, when everybody was freaking out over it, me and my buds made it something of a running joke. Every now and then, someone would cough, and we would all yell swine flu. When someone was out, instead of telling everyone they got hit by a bus, we'd say they had swine flu. My friend once threw a stuffed pig at me, crying "SWINE FLEW!!"

Good times…

But really. Swine flu is really not all that fun. I've known people with it, and they have told me how much it sucks.

And it is for that reason and others that I am a complete and total germaphobe. There aren't many things I fear, but getting sick is definitely one of 'em. That, Al Roker, and clowns. (The movie It ruined them for me).