I know, I'm a few hours behind schedule, I'm really sorry! Usually, I'm better at updates than this, but as you can see with this chapter...IT'S INCREDIBLY LONG. I tried to make myself take out the unnecessary details in order to shorten it, but dang, I'm not known for being succinct and I have no idea how to make myself succinct...I've failed essays this way!

Anyways, since this chapter is practically never-ending (I hope the overload of details don't overload you!), I won't add any other unnecessary information.

Just this warning: Leo may be OOC in here, depending on how you portray him. Along with this note: There are some references in here back to chapter one. All you need to remember is the part where Donnie turns his back on Raph in order to clean up the medical supplies and that's where this line comes in - "It had become an all too familiar site." It's not REALLY important, but I thought it'd help you all get through this one. :)

PLEASE READ EDIT OF 9/2/2012 AT BOTTOM OF CHAPTER.

What You Deserve

When Raph finally knew what to do with the…idea…he had Leo by his side to help him choose the path he believed he needed to walk on.

"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU, RAPHAEL!" Leo screeched as he clung harder to Raph's waist, clenching his eyes shut together tightly as he tried to shut out the blurring colors that zoomed past him.

"Heh, music to my ears!" Raph exclaimed through his peels of maniacal laughter. He revved the engine until it drowned out his cackles, going from 60 to 70mph. And he could've sworn he heard Leo whimper. "Didn't I tell ya we'd have to go on my cycle, Leo?"

"Yes, you did tell me that," Leo snapped out, peeking his eyes open just a bit before shutting them closed immediately. They weren't in the city anymore, he knew that much, and the distorted shapes of numerous lines of trees proved that to him. "But I only agreed to that because you promised me you'd go SLOW!"

Raph scoffed loudly. His poor, naïve brother. Going slow? On his baby? Which Donnie took the liberty of mechanically engineering into going a maximum speed of 180mph? No. Just…no…how can Leo not realize how wrong that sounded?

"I did not promise that, bro," Raph replied, pausing so that he could properly maneuver his bike through a turn…without slowing down. "I promised we'd get there in one piece." He winced as he felt Leo squeeze his midriff harder, almost cutting off all means of breathing.

"Yes, what a MORON was I to think 'getting there in one piece' meant going at a speed that would make sure we'd get there in one piece," Leo growled, his words almost getting lost in the wind. It was honestly a wonder how they could even still hear each other at that point.

"Aw, now you're just bein' unreasonable," Raph replied with a snicker. He turned a sharp left onto a ramp that would bring him up to the entryway towards the abandoned power plant he and Mikey was at a few days ago.

"Me–Unreasonable!?" said Leo, disbelief coloring his voice to a point where it just made him sound just plain pissed. "If I'm unreasonable, then there must be a whole new word for people like you!"

Raph quickly reached over to playfully flick at his brother's visor. "Come on, oh Fearless one, stop bein' such a wuss," he said, smirking as he felt his passenger seethe behind him. "Jus' pull your hands away, throw them up in the air, and then you'll have–"

Leo didn't even give him a chance to finish.

"NO!" Leo yelled, raising his head so that his visor knocked against the back of Raph's helmet. "No, I won't and you know why, HOTHEAD?" His fingers dug into Raph's plastron and, vehemently, he hoped he was hurting him. "Because then I would fall off and die before I get to take you down with me!"

"Don't be such a killjoy," Raph said, mirth coating his every word. "You know I'd never let ya fall off."

"I'll be a joy once I kill you," Leo darkly returned, but finally, he loosened his death hold as he settled back down against Raph's shell. And in a lighter tone, he continued, "At least, until you somehow find a way back to come back from the dead and haunt me in my sleep."

Raph's shoulders loosened at that and an unnaturally wide grin took place on his face.

Gosh, how he missed this; just hanging out with Leo and arguing with him like they always used to do. He went so long without it that he forgot just how nice it was and still is. Just how did he survive a whole year without this?

'You didn't,' said a small voice, sadistic and unbidden in the confines of his mind. 'You didn't survive.' Raph couldn't stop himself from wincing.

'Remember?'

Raph suddenly felt nauseous and with it, the road became blurry to him. It morphed with the trees on the side and the encroaching darkness made it even harder to decipher which was pavement and which was gravel.

It took him a bit more time until he could really comprehend that the haziness was because he wasn't able to see straight anymore.

Now, that wasn't new to Raph. One time, he wasn't able to gain enough distance before he went flying back against the pavement due to the aftershock of an explosion. When he gained consciousness, his helmet was thrown off of him, he was unable to see in one eye because it was so swollen, and he was half-blind in the other eye because it was buried underneath stray particles of dirt.

But he was damn determined to make it back home before midnight (he promised) and not even a loss of sight was going to stop him. So he drove all the way back home on his bike–nonstop and without getting in an accident–until he could safely hide away in the darkness of the sewers.

That's why, at first, Raph wasn't worried.

Then his heart skipped a beat when he remembered that Leo was riding at the back with him.

'Shit!' he inwardly yelped, trying not to let his racing pulse take control over his senses as he forced himself to slowly press on the breaks. He didn't dare tear his eyes away from the speedometer as it gradually went from 80 to zero in a few painstaking minutes.

"Raph?" Leo's voice, ridden with concern, broke through the fog in Raph's head. He felt his brother pull away from him to place a grounding hand on his shoulder. "Why are you slowing down?"

Raph find it ironic that slowing down his bike troubled Leo instead of calmed him.

Shaking his head slightly, he parked his motorcycle right before the bridge that led up to the Power Plant's main compound. Unfolding the place folder at the side, he waited for a click as it hit the dirt and then slammed a foot against the ground.

He took a few seconds to catch his breath and calm down his mile-per-minute heartbeats before he dared reply to his brother. "We gotta walk the rest of the way," he slowly replied, relieved to find that his voice was still able to sound normal.

"Al…right," Leo said hesitantly, slowly getting off his seat as he removed the helmet from his head. "Any reason? You could've stopped closer than this. We're still a bit far from the Power Plant."

Raph shrugged as he swung his leg to one side, taking off his own helmet before he dismounted his bike. "Just thought some exercise would be, uh, good," he replied, wincing at how stupid that sounded.

Seriously, he used to be able to make snap omissions and falsehoods right off the bat when he needed to. Now he can't even make a straight, convincing lie. Sure he was able to lie to Mikey about the truth behind the kidnapping spree, but that was different…

Either way, being back with his brothers and father had softened him up.

'Guess this is why they don't like it when spies and assassins have families,' Raph thought wryly.

"Alright," Leo repeatedly softly, not liking the look in Raph's eyes.

It was a glint he had seen way too much in his brother's eyes ever since he got back. But he didn't know exactly how to bring that up and he wasn't sure if he was even merited to do so. Not even Splinter, Mikey, and Don were able to get anything out of him and they were here the whole time.

'So how much more for me?' Leo asked, hopelessness weighing down his features.

With a soft sigh, he averted his eyes downwards and spoke, "Well, Raph, you're the leader for tonight." He placed his helmet gently on the backseat of the motorcycle. "Where is this special spot you wanted to show me?"

Raph's resolve for secrecy almost broke when he heard the tone Leo's voice was in. It was very obvious what the older turtle wanted to ask and what was stopping him from asking it was just as palpable. But the mere fact that Leo was holding back from grilling Raph about everything and anything showed just how far the other one had come.

Raph gave a sincere, heartfelt smile that thoroughly caught Leo off guard.

"Follow me, bro," Raph said, motioning once over his shoulder before he pivoted on his heel and began to walk across the rusting metal bridge.

Leo was frozen where he stood for a moment before a slow grin crept onto his face. A soft chuckle escaped his lips and, quickly, he began to follow after his brother.

And when Leo fell in step beside his brother, Raph was suddenly hit with the notion that the older turtle should get some details, even if it wasn't everything. The only thing he was hoping for was that it didn't somehow turn into everything.

But steeling himself against the temptation, he took a deep breath and made himself go for it.

"I used ta come here a lot," Raph began in an easy tone as he looked straight at the path ahead of him, not glancing once at the person walking next to him.

But Leo, on the other hand, unashamedly looked his way. "Really? Why?" To be honest, he couldn't even imagine the homeless people coming down here to take over this place. It wasn't so much because the place was that much of a dump, but it's just because…well, it's an abandoned Power Plant.

"I don't wanna give anythin' away," Raph replied with a half-grin, "But there's a view here that kicks ass."

Leo raised an eyebrow ridge at Raph, impressed. "Oh, now I really have to see it if it gets you all excited."

Raph finally looked over at Leo, a smirk planted on him. "Hey, I can appreciate the finer things in nature." He shrugged one shoulder as he made a sweeping gesture at nothing in particular. "I ain't that much of an idiot."

Leo reached over to lay a hand on Raph's arm. "I never implied that and I never will," Leo stated seriously before letting his hand drop to his side. "I'm just saying that there are only a few views you really like enough to go out of your way to show us." Leo paused for a moment, before hesitantly asking, "You have showed Donnie and Mikey, right?"

Raph's silence was the only answer needed.

He winced slightly at the incredulous look he was given. "Hey, don't look at me like that," Raph defended with a slight scowl. "I don't got a reason to!"

Leo's nonexistent eyebrows rose at that. "But you have a reason to show me?" Leo asked skeptically.

Raph let out a snort and before he could think about what he was saying, he replied, "You're the reason why I kept comin' back here in the first place." At the same time, both Leo and Raph's eyes widened and Raph felt his stomach flutter guiltily. "That…didn't mean ta come out…"

A look of trepidation grew on Leo's face. "Sure," Leo said, a bitter taste pooling in his mouth. He suddenly had a feeling why no one was told what was going through Raph's head. "You don't only go here for the view, don't you?"

Raph looked down at the broken tiles of the cobblestone pathway they were walking on. "I told ya. That didn't mean ta come out."

Leo smiled weakly at that as he looked away, quietly responding, "It's alright. You only told me the truth and I shouldn't be offended by the truth."

Raph's stare turned unconvinced. "Yea, but that wasn't what ya wanted ta hear, right?"

It may seem peculiar, but Raph no longer wanted Leo to feel bad about what he did. He was way past punishing Leo for going MIA. His brother returned, they blew up like Mount Vesuvius at each other, suffered the consequences, and now they got over it. That's the thing with Raph; he will start by trying to hurt you ten times more than you have hurt him, but after everything is done and over with, it is done and over with.

It's not even worth mentioning.

That's why it kind of pissed him off that his mouth went off–again–and mentioned it.

"Okay, fine, no, that isn't what I wanted to hear," Leo replied as he let out a soft sigh. He winced as Raph's hand abruptly dropped from his shoulder. He turned his head quickly to his brother, his wince turning into a grimace as he caught the culpability lurking in Raph's countenance. "But those are details I have to know, Raph. Even if it does hurt, even if I don't want to hear it, I need to know it."

Raph's eyes suddenly lit up amusedly at that. "Sounds like somethin' I'd say."

Leo grinned. "It does, doesn't it?" For some reason, the thought made Leo proud of himself. But for once in his life, he decided not to overthink the 'why.' "Guess that makes us more alike than we thought," he said, his tone teasing but his words genuine.

An odd and unreadable glint entered Raph's irises. But he turned towards his brother with an open smile. "Nah. It was jus' that time out there in yourjungle that screwed with yer head."

That made Leo pause for a bit, a thoughtful look gathering in his eyes. "It's not my jungle," he started, a wry edge rimming his voice. "You are my brother, this is my city, the sewers is my home," he emphasized, looking directly, albeit hesitantly, into his brother's dumbstruck irises. "But that had never, once, been my jungle."

Raph looked down slightly, swallowing a lump down in his throat as his fists clenched into a quivering fist.

And unexpectedly, he blurted out, "I'm sorry."

Leo blinked a few times at that before intelligibly voicing, "…What?"

The back of Raph's neck began to heat up.

He couldn't bring himself to look at his brother as he further explained, "I thought ya didn't come home 'cause you thought it was your jungle. Ya got no more expectations, ya didn't have to look after us all the time, ya didn't have to be perfect Mr. Splinter's pet. It made sense." Raph smirked wryly at Leo's shocked expression. "What, think I didn't know ya that well?"

A small, awed smile spread across Leo's lips. "No. I just forgot you did," he whispered. Then averting his eyes downwards slightly, he softly pointed out, "But that doesn't explain why you're sorry."

Raph's irises turned bittersweet. "I'm sorry 'cause…" Something heavy began to weigh down on his features. "…It never occurred to me that you didn't come back 'cause you were miserable down there." Leo flinched at that and outright grimaced when piercing amber eyes turned towards him. "You were, weren't you?"

Leo's lips pulled down to the side, his eyelids closing halfway at that. "I was," he replied, weakly.

"Thought so," Raph mumbled, rubbing the back of his head as he looked back at the trail. "But what was it, Leo? I know the why, I just don't know…" Raph's voice wandered into nothing more a moment and it was the silence that cut sharply into Leo's mind. "…What was it that stopped ya from coming back to your home."

A painfully unreadable smile came onto Leo's face. "I asked myself that every day," he disclosed in a quiet voice. A look of pain and loneliness came onto his face and it was more than enough for Raph to feel hollow. "Would you believe me if I said it wasn't because of all the expectations placed on me?"

Raph cocked an eyebrow ridge. "No. And didn't ya jus' say that was the reason?"

Leo chuckled at that and correcting, "No, I said I forgot that you knew me so well." Raph gave him a dry stare and Leo smirked at the expression. But as it fell from his lips, he continued, "Anyways, yes, the expectations had a part in it but I wasn't scared because I knew I had them." Leo's eyes lowered. "I was scared because I thought I wasn't good enough to live up to them."

Raph's eyes widened. "Leo…"

A pained expression fell over Leo's countenance and he looked into Raph's amber irises with a desperate sincerity in them.

"Of course I wanted to be the son Master Splinter would be proud of. Of course I wanted to be the leader you all needed me to be. I want to look after Donnie and Mikey…after you." A glimmer of contentment shined through the shadows on Leo's face. "I never resented my responsibilities, Raphael. I felt honored by it." Suddenly, a vulnerability appeared on Leo's face and it made him seem so much younger in Raph's eyes. "It was only me I resented."

Raphael spun around completely and stopped dead in his tracks, grabbing Leo's shoulders in a tight grip with a look of absolute conviction set deeply in his amber eyes.

"God damn, no wonder you didn't come back," Raph growled, his conviction becoming accompanied with incredulity and a little bit of guilt.

Leo flinched once more at that. "Raph–"

"No, don't interrupt me," Raph…interrupted. He ignored the wry stare sent his way. "Leo, don't ya ever fuckin' do that to yerself or I swear, I really will kick yer head open! Masta Splinter shouldn't have even sent ya away in the first place. Yer one shell of a son, definitely his best student fer cryin' out loud, and…" Raph took a deep breath as he finally confessed aloud, "…And you could never be a better leader even if ya tried."

Leo was sure Raph would never be able to understand just how much those words meant to him.

It almost made him wish he had a tape recorder…but his stay in South America had taught him a lot of things. And one of it was how impersonal and meaningless it becomes when you try to force the moments in your life to be remembered.

And, well, he knew he didn't have to preserve Raph's words in his memory–because it already was.

And that is why, for the first time in his life, his chest didn't throb with pain-racking pressure when he admitted…

"That's not true." Leo smiled gently. Raph's eyes widened at the look of affection that graced his brother's countenance. "Raph, there are so many things that I realized; things I never would've figured out if I stayed here." Raph inaudibly gulped at those all-too-familiar words. "The results may not have been obvious at first, but I'm really glad that it happened."

They stopped in front of the Power Plant's cooling tower. Raph slid his stare back to the broken entrance way of the towering building they stood in front of, turning towards it fully as he tried to find the words that wanted to escape from him.

And when he found it, Raph knew that - someday - he was going to regret asking it but…"Was it worth it, then?" he asked softly. "Being alone? Makin' us go on without ya? Was that all worth whatever you were tryin' to do do out there?"

Something in Raph's voice made Leo want to say 'no.'

But something in Leo's sense of honor made him say…

"Yes." Leo turned his head back to Raph. "I'm not sure if that's the answer you wanted, but it was." Raph's amber irises became…poisoned, somehow. As if Leo's words reawakened something that should've been dead a long time ago.

Leo's throat became a desert as the sudden urge to take back his words almost made the oxygen stop going to his brain. But instead–

"I became the person I needed to be," Leo forced out through a throbbing throat.

Raph made a small 'hmn' sound, a sudden epiphany striking into his solemn smile. He let his head drop forwards again and silently, he reached over to push open the cracked, steel door hanging by its hinges.

His hand paused right before he touched the surface.

"No. That ain't what I wanted to hear," Raph replied slowly, lightly laying his fingers against the entrance way. "But that's alright. 'Cause that's not what matters." He jerked the door open with a light push and stepped inside before Leo had the time to reply to that.

Leo's eyes furrowed together. "Raph? What did you mean by that?" He squinted his eyes to see through the blackness Raph disappeared into. "Raph?"

A resounding bang of metal against metal greeted Leo's ears. "In here, Fearless!"

With hesitant steps, Leo forced himself to follow after Raph. Suddenly, he was swallowed up by shadows and rapidly, he blinked his eyes to adjust to the dimmed settings. Narrowing his eyes slightly, he waited for his senses to catch up with him and immediately, he felt his senses sharpen.

Nodding his head a bit, he finally craned his head upwards and stared at the open metal floor stretched out above him. It was illuminated with the pale glow the moon filtering in through the bar grating design, making him smile slightly…

…Until he remembered that Raph should be here somewhere.

"Raph?" Leo called, paranoia making him grip the handle of his katana behind him. "Raph, where are you!?"

"Wow, yer time in that jungle really made a mess outta ya, huh?" Raph said, the exasperation in his voice echoing everywhere.

Leo's eyes widened when he realized that the area which blocked the moonlight from his view was…

"Raph!" Leo hissed, looking incredulously at the foot on the other side of the metal divider. "What are you doing up there? This place has been abandoned for over twenty years, that thing could cave in at any second now!"

Raph snorted at that. "Trust me when I say this, Leo: sure, it's gonna cave someday, but I'm tellin' ya now that it ain't gonna any time soon." Raph looked down at the cracks below his feet, smirking wryly at the auburn eyes glaring back up at him.

"Is that so," Leo bit out sarcastically.

Raph shook his head slightly as he rolled his eyes. And walking slowly to the floor door a few ways beside him and kneeling down, he stuck his hand through the door. "Look, you wanna see why I come 'ere a lot or don't ya?"

There was a period of stillness that, for a moment, made Raph's wonder if he took things too far.

"I do," Leo said quietly, a torn sigh accompanying his words.

"Alright then," Raph said with a triumphant grin as Leo finally came to view, an expression of irritation and resignation intertwined palpably on the elder one's face.

"I'm trusting you here, Raph," Leo sighed as he wrapped his fingers around his brother's, letting himself be pulled up from the safety of the first floor and onto the deathtrap of the second.

"I'm honored," Raph replied and despite his mocking words, he had to swallow down the lump that formed in the back of his throat.

And once he stood back to let his brother step onto the metal floors, he didn't even have any time to point upwards when Leo tilted his head back and…

"Oh my shell," Leo breathed, eyes wide and mouth dropped open. His expression of utter awe brought a grin onto Raph's face.

Raph looked back onto the sky as well as he said in a warm voice, "Yea. I know."

Stars. Oceans of them. Sprinkled across the canvas of the midnight sky, millions of it hung above their heads like an unending landscape. It was an explosion that tore open through the darkness and the way their glimmers of light reflected off Raph and Leo's irises proved it.

A small smile quivered across Leo's lips. "This is amazing. I never knew they had this back home."

Raph looked back his brother, smiling contentedly at the expression of wonderment still embedded on his face. "Hey Leo?" He waited until those auburn irises turned towards him. "Back in the jungle…did ya see a lot of stars there?"

Leo nodded. "Yes." He began to rub his bicep as he admitted, "I looked at it every night before going to sleep–it was the only thing I liked about that place."

Raph's smile became strained. "M'glad," he admitted, rubbing the back of his neck as Leo shot him a questioning look. And for a few moments, that's what they did; stare at each other.

"Raph?" Leo asked quietly. "What is it?"

Raph parted his mouth slightly, but when his brother's eyes caught his, his mouth slid closed.

"Raph," Leo tried again, his gaze becoming penetrating. Quickly, an idea formed in his head and, slowly, he found himself saying, "When night fell in the cave I was hiding in, I always made a fire. Even when there was a chance someone could see it, I just had to."

Leo smiled half-heartedly at the silently inquiring gaze Raph sent him.

"It wasn't to ward off predators, the darkness, or the cold," Leo continued, his eyes falling to Raph's belt sash. "It was so I could pretend I was back in the sewers. With all of you, because…" His voice began to falter. "…Because I never had to make a fire to be warm there." Leo looked back at Raph, the strange mix of his hurt and his sincerity reflected onto his little brother's irises.

"You were torturing yerself, ya know that?" Raph pointed out, rubbing the back of his neck as he let out a depressed sigh.

Leo took one sweeping glance at the shadows that surrounded them. "I have a feeling so were you."

Raph's eyes widened nervously at that, struggling to keep his wavering connection with his brother. And all he wanted was to shut his mouth in eternal secrecy. But he knew it was his turn now. He knew what Leo was trying to get at with his little story.

So he forced himself to open his mouth.

"There were these times…when I thought I was forgettin' ya," Raph started, trying to ignore the dumbstruck look Leo gave him. "It was drivin' me nuts, the thought of it." He gave into a half-hearted chuckle. "And I needed…I needed a place ta remember. I was lucky 'nough to find out 'bout this place."

From the audible gulp that Leo didn't bother to hide, Raph knew what he was going back to…

"You don't only go here for the view, don't you?"

Raph gritted his teeth hard. But he knew that his second choice was, eventually, falling into another Freudian slip, so he might as well–

"So I started coming here," Raph muttered. "Because I was thinking that wherever the shell you were, there had ta be a crapload of stars, right? You had ta be lookin' up at 'em too." Despite himself, a small smile stretched across Raph's lips. "Turns out, you were. And ya know what that means, bro?" Something veiled came onto Raph's features…and Leo wanted to scream. "That meant you were looking up at the stars with me."

Leo shook his head rapidly at that, taking a step closer towards his brother and raising a hand towards him.

It was a sight that made Donnie flash through Raph's mind and it gave him a sense of déjà vu.

Shaking the image out of his head, Raph stepped closer towards his brother's outstretched fingers, making sure that his shell wasn't turned towards his older brother.

"Leo," Raph asked with furrowed eyebrows. "What're ya–"

"That look!" Leo snapped, helpless confusion tearing his voice apart. "You always have this look in your eyes, this darkness behind your words, this regret, this sadness, this…" A sudden epiphany crashed head first into his mind. "…Raph…is it because of the Nightwatcher?" Raph's shoulders stiffened and Leo began to tread carefully. "It is, isn't it? Did you do something…or did something happen…when you were him?"

Raph clenched his eyes together tightly…

…But it wasn't quick enough for Leo to miss the emptiness embedded deeply in those irises.

Leo fought the lightheadedness rushing through his veins from taking over his head. "Raph," he whispered, "This is why I didn't want you to be that vigilante." He could only imagine what his brother went through without him as that metal-clad law enforcer. And his imagination took him to places that made him sick. "People lose themselves with that kind of life."

Raph looked blankly at his brother. "Speakin' from experience?"

Leo shook his head grimly…sadly. "Speaking from other people's experience."

Raph recoiled at that. And said the only thing he could say. "I'm sorry."

Raph wasn't sure if Leo knew exactly what that sorry was meant for. But whatever Leo connected it to, it didn't matter. Because whatever Leo thought he was sorry for…Raph was sorry for it.

"Don't say that," Leo sighed out, fatigue weighing down his eyes. "You have nothing to be sorry for." Then with earnestness deep-set on his countenance, he added, "And I don't like it when you say that."

Almost instantaneously, Raph's solemnity morphed into a scowl. "Damn, what is with you 'n' everyone else?" he barked. "Masta Splinter don't like it when I listen, Donnie likes when I insult 'im, Mikey likes it when I punch 'im, and you don't like it when I apologize." He threw his hands up in the air, high above his head. "What the shell is wrong with all of you!?"

Leo rolled his eyes at that, but a small, pleased smile came onto his lips. "We don't like being abused, Raph," he pointed out gently. "We like when you are you."

Raph paused immediately at that. Slowly bringing his hands back down to his side, he just let Leo's words resonate stubbornly within the confines in his mind. And he let himself take a few seconds to finally just…

…Get it.

"There it is," Leo said in gradual apprehension, looking warily at the unreadable edge rimming his brother's features. "There it is again. That look."

Raph let out an explosive, painstaking sigh as his eyes finally fell back to earth. "Fuck, Leo," he murmured. "Just…look, the point is, I ain't him anymore." His look turned pleading towards his brother. "He doesn't matter."

For a few long moments, Leo struggled on how to reply to that. "Yes." In the end, though…"You're right. He doesn't."…He just decided on the truth. "But you do."

Raph's mouth dropped open slightly at that.

Leo smiled half-heartedly. "I'm not Mikey, Raph. I don't hold the Nightwatcher on a pedestal," he admitted with no diffidence. "I couldn't care less about him."

Raph snapped his mouth shut at that before letting out an incredulous laugh. "Yea, definitely not," he returned with an unreserved grin, looking gratefully at his brother. "Y'know, I think I'd disappoint Mikey if he knew the truth," he admitted after an uncertainty-ridden beat.

Leo snorted deprecatingly at that. Giving his brother a dry stare, he firmly told him, "Never. None of us could ever disappoint him. That's one of the many qualities of his that makes us spoil him sometimes." He grinned at the real bout of laughter that escaped his sibling's lips.

Raph wiped the side of his lips with his knuckles when his laughter gave way to here and there chuckles. But then...

"What is the truth, Raph?" Leo asked, his irises filled with hope...a tentative hope.

Raph's smile fell from his lips. "Leo…" he started quietly, regret clear in his voice. "…I can't tell you…it's…I ain't…"

Leo gave Raph a small, understanding smile. "It's okay," he assured. "You don't have to tell me." He held out a fist to the younger turtle, his auburn irises becoming bright with a promise. "But when you're ready, Raph…I'll be here."

Raph raised his own fist towards the appendage held out to him. But he paused an inch away from his brother's hand as that look wedged back in between his amber eyes. "Ya mean that?" Raph found himself questioning, wincing at how small he sounded.

Leo tried to push that irrational, foreboding fear back down into the pit of his stomach. "I mean that," he replied softly, finally feeling his brother's fist bump against his.

And for a long moment, they just stood there, smiling guardedly at each other.

Then with a whole world left unsaid…

…They turned back to stare at the sparkling emblems of stars together.

That was when Raph made up his mind. The problem - as it always has been - was that his family needed him to change. And he was done thinking that he had a way to solve it. He was done putting doubt in what that solution was. He was done. Because, now...well, now?

He knew what he was going to do.

(Flinches) Is it too obvious that I favor Leo and Raph's relationship more so than the others? Gah...the brotherly bonding in here is trying to strangle me.

I hope this wasn't too insanely drowned in...well, whatever it seems to be drowned in. :P It's 3 o'clock in the morning, I can't think well. But I welcome any comments, complaints, or questions.

Anyways, it'll take a bit longer for me to get the next chapter out - but you can expect it no later than next Friday. School time is starting back up again...damn it.

EDIT - 9/2/2012: ThisCatalyst'sPen made me an edited screen-grab photo for this chapter; THANKS SO MUCH, HUN! It's simple but at times like these, simple really is the best way to go. :3 Anyways, I would like to share it with you...but because Fanfic can be retarded with links, please check out the link on my profile.

Oh, and also be sure to take a look at her other works, they're very nice to look at!