Hi!

I'm sorry... took forever, it's short, and this still has short scenes.

But I'm on WINTER BREAK now, so it should be better :D I'm so exciiiiteedddd! I lived through first semester!

DISC 1: This phrase is rather obvious. The absorption spectrum. Like with stars and stuff. The absorption spectra of something shows what elements are in it, and by seeing their properties and such, you can tell what it is you're looking at! (Thank you Wikipedia/googling a bunch of things!)

DISC 2: Annndd... again, sorry this took so long. Finals and stuff. And I was gonna post it earlier. But then we got this package, it's this cute tower of boxes and they have like, chocolate and pears and stuff in them, and dunno who it's from. Probably one of my weird Canadian cousins :D anyways, that distracted me for a while, and then I wrote another story, which I really have to stop doing, it's a bad habit, interrupting my TF stories with other categories, but, hey... I have a very ADD mind.

Obviously.

Anyways!

Notes:

Blu: Hound and Sunny were playing, like, Need for Speed or something :D and Hound's so cute!

Obsydiandreams: I wish I could too! That would be so, so fun.. and evil… and fun! About that not-hurting-other-bots thing… ummm… well…

Bella's Camero: Hi :D

Robins princess starfire: glad you're liking :D it's okay, no confusion, I figured it out :D

Broflove: :D ominous, yes?

j.d.y.: optimus better run..

Peya Luna: oooo never thought of that idea, of why he'd separate them like that! Hmm that's good… I haven't seen that movie, I should :D

Astrianna: Guess Optimus is just askin for it :D It was just so convenient… never did see the series though..

TransFormers101: Glad ya like :D

Smounged1989: Glad ya like it!

Faecat: Poor Wheeljack… getting his lab remodeled without his permission :D

Enjoy!

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"He says there's logic to it." Ironhide said quietly, as Jazz picked through a stack of datapads, looking down, "he said it wasn't... on purpose."

"Was he even thinking?" Jazz shook his head, staring down at the datapads, "I can't... believe..."

"He said he thought it through. But from this purely logical standpoint," Ironhide leaned against the wall, watching Jazz's fidgety movements, "he's going, First Aid's the medic going, Cliffjumper's going as the scout, he wants me for weapons and strategy, and Sunstreaker's the toughliner."

"What?" Jazz's gaze rose to meet his, "He's taking Sunny away from Swipe?" Ironhide just nodded. "That's..."

"That's cruel is what it is." Ironhide studied his overly-fragile bot, wondering, just wondering. "It'll kill them."

When he pulled Jazz into his arms and kissed him goodbye, he could feel it.

Could feel Jazz's spark crying out, the suppressed, instinctual wail of I need Prowl, that Jazz knew to try and hide it.

And then Ironhide walked away.

Sunstreaker wasn't going to let Sideswipe see how hard it was for him. He'd decided that, because he knew, he always knew, that if he fell apart, Sides would feel like the entire world had fallen to pieces. Sunstreaker knew, because that was how he always felt, when he was upset and Sideswipe was there as a steady, calm force, it always felt like maybe the world was more stable than it felt.

He couldn't fall apart.

Recharge had been shunted from his systems since long before he should have been awake; they had to leave, soon, and he still didn't have the heart to wake Swipe. Sideswipe was asleep, tangled with him, deep in the recharge that had evaded him for more than half the night. Sunstreaker knew how worried, how outright terrified, he was, could feel the restrained emotion leaking across their bond, escaping through walls Sideswipe was putting up against it. He had every right to be, despite his refusal to show it all. Both knew what the mission constituted. In the past, both would have gone, which was always significantly less painful. Never before had a team required only one toughliner.

It felt wrong, like half of a whole, like tearing something into two.

And Sunstreaker knew it was far worse to wait and be completely in the dark, than to be in the midst of the battle. Waiting was always worse for them, feeling through their bond without seeing, it was like being blind to terrors that could be so clearly felt.

[Sunstreaker,] Ironhide private comm.'d him, [we have to go.]

He looked down at his sleeping bonded, curled up tightly against him.

[I'll be there shortly.]

[Take your time,] Ironhide's voice in his processor, gentle with understanding, [meet you outside].

"Swipe..." Sunstreaker ran a hand down Sideswipe's back, eliciting a soft purr; Sideswipe was always endearingly affectionate and cuddly in the mornings, particularly before full consciousness set in. Sideswipe snuggled in next to him, arm slipping around him. "Swipe, I have to go..." He fought away the catch in his voice, refused to let tears fall. Sideswipe tensed, holding him tighter.

"No."

"I'm sorry..." He ran a soft touch up and down Sideswipe's back, "I'm so sorry." Sideswipe turned his face into Sunstreaker's chest, mumbled something that sounded like sparkbreak. "I'll be back soon as I can." Sideswipe's embrace only tightened, like he never, never wanted to let go. Sunstreaker didn't want him to.

"I love you Sunny." Don't leave me, came the silent cry through their bond, please, Sunny, I can't live without you, you're half of everything I am.

Sunstreaker wasn't going to cry.

"I love you too, Swipe." He pressed a soft kiss to Sideswipe's lips, "I'll come back soon."

He hated leaving his entire world behind.

The vow not to cry melted away as soon as they'd left the Ark II, in that quiet, deteriorating shatter of risking everything.

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Sam did not have a high pain threshold. He'd sobbed his heart out when he broke his arm playing baseball in second grade, and whined with every baby tooth that came out. He'd needed a band-aid over every scrape and an ice pack for every bruise. His mother used to say it was a good thing he hadn't been a girl, because he'd never have been able to handle childbirth; that had gone on his list of "things to be thankful for."

The pain of the procedures was worse than anything he'd ever experienced. It was like a dull, dark heat had settled into his body, every movement lighting it on fire that traveled like following a path of oil, raging and howling until he wanted to completely break down and give up entirely, on everything, just to make it stop.

Bumblebee had always been the one to save Sam, whether from near-dismemberment by the Decepticons or from hitting the ground after falling off a building; he would comm. Sam every time the pain lit up the world with a screaming, white-hot brightness that made everything burn, and burn, and burn. His voice reminded Sam why the pain was nothing.

"Why're you lookin' at that again?" Sam asked, blinking up at the ceiling. He struggled to regain clarity, trying to figure out what Ratchet was doing. The medic didn't turn from the illuminated screen. "'s my spark, right?"

"Yes." He turned, hesitance on his face. "I've finished all the preliminary procedures."

"Oh, gee, now the fun starts, right?" Sam groaned, lying back on the bed, "Will that hurt as much, too?" The silence made him sigh heavily, the motion only making his aching body whine in protest, "more?"

"The next step is to work on your spark" Ratchet said, "You see, infection is the long-standing danger, as well as metalloid rejection-"

"Like when they do kidney transplants and people reject it?"

"Yes, just like that, but with the metal that will be infusing your skin. That's later on, but right now..."

"Lemme guess," Sam said wearily, "That's long, drawn out risk of death, this is instantaneous, extremely risky thing?"

Ratchet hated having to say yes to something like that.

"Yes, Sam."

"Is there... I don't, isn't there some sort of limit, to pain?" Sam turned pleading eyes to him. Ratchet drew in a slow cycle of intakes.

"Sam, unfortunately, the absorption spectra of a life shows a lot of pain."

Sam was going to ask for clarification, when Bee's comm. distracted him, [Remember the time you fell in the lake? You looked so, so cute when you were all soaking wet and mad].

If all that pain meant that he would be around to fall in lakes and make Bee smile, Sam reminded himself, it was worth it, anything was worth it, everything he was going through was worth it, just to have that time with Bee.

[Remember that time you fell in a lake?] Sam sent back.

[....no, I never have...] Bee sounded perplexed. Sam half smiled.

[It hasn't happened yet. But someday, it will.]

Sam didn't care if he had to suffer to achieve their someday. It was worth it, he reminded himself as Ratchet held up the syringe and needle with the anesthesia he had to inject Sam with, worth everything so he'd be able to stay with Bee. To remember the times they had shared and to dream; he wanted to dream of the memories he'd have later to remember because he'd lived to have them. Worth it.

Staying, belonging, staying, staying.

Bee's voice was with him, as the world went down in the screaming flames of pain.

[Remember, Sam, remember-]

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Jazz didn't like cleaning, it was tedious and pointless. That his office had fallen into chaotic disarray in such a short time was bewildering; the other bots had moved his old office into the new one on the Ark II, and it had been organized, at some point. Jazz didn't wonder who had organized it.

"WHO DID THIS?!" Wheeljack's scream came from down the hallway, "Twins! I mean, uh- NOT TWINS! What the PIT is WRONG WITH YOU TWO?!"

Jazz snickered, knew he would have found more amusement in the spark meltdown normally, and turned back to the mess at hand.

It felt like Prowl was everywhere, when things were organized, and the mess made Jazz feel like he was slipping away.

He should have figured; Prowl was always one to plan ahead, prepare for the worst. Finding the datapad in his desk drawer only proved it.

Prowl had made himself face the reality Jazz had locked out of his consciousness, and prepared for the possibility of death to separate them in a way distance never could.

Jazz sank into his chair, datapad in his hands, to read what Prowl had never wanted to have to say to him.

Jazz,

You're reading this because I died and never got to say goodbye. I'm so sorry for that, Jazz, I really am. I know this is really hard for you, but you can't let my death kill you too. I know you. I know it could. I love you and I hope you don't ever forget how that feels, and I don't care that I never was your brother, but I'm always going to be. I'm really proud of you, it took a lot of courage to leave with the team. I'm sorry I'm not here now that you're back home. I hoped you wouldn't come home to news like this, and I swear to you, I tried so hard to keep that from happening. I'm so, so sorry it did.

You're not alone, Jazz. I know there's a bot that loves you, too, and can give you more than I ever could. A brother can't complete you the way a bonded can; it's my last hope that you've found that bot by the time you're reading this.

I hope he's there with you right now. I know he would be, and I know he loves you in a way that will make you whole again. Let him mean the world to you. Don't be scared he'll leave you like I had to. He's worth it. He loves you.

I missed you, Jazz, and I was always proud of you. I know I've always said you're impatient and stubborn, but you've become a strong leader, and I couldn't be more proud of the bot you've become. I know you always said that being 2IC was the best thing I ever was, and that there was nothing better in the world.

You were wrong, Jazz.

Being your brother was better.

Prowl.

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Bee hadn't thought he'd have the ability to be even more worried than he'd been a while ago. He hadn't known the sheer amount of concern was possible, given all that he felt for Sam.

The true boundlessness of concern revealed itself when he came across Sideswipe, with the other bots in the rec room, barely there at all.

He'd been snappish all day, before jolting into a snarling anger, and now, slipping back into silent misery. Bee slid onto the couch beside him, unnoticed by Mirage.

"Swipe?" Bee ventured, receiving little response, save for half a glance. "Are you gonna be okay?"

Sideswipe played his fingertips over his spark chamber, shook his head no.

He slipped out of the room wordlessly; Jazz soon wandered over to take his place. Bee didn't miss the way Mirage tensed up at the sight of him.

"How's he holdin' up?" Jazz asked, waving a hand towards the direction Sideswipe had gone in.

"Well..." Bee paused, tried not to break down as he felt the echoes of pain through his bond to Sam, and there were no words to offer. Silence dragged on for a few more moments. "How 'bout you, Jazz?" Jazz shrugged, not saying.

How well could they expect him to feel, Bee wondered, when he'd lost both bots he was close to, one for good?

"I'll see you guys later," Mirage jumped up abruptly, "Gonna go... see... if Ratchet needs help." Before clarification could be requested of him, he'd hustled out of the room.

"Gonna be okay?" Bee asked Jazz softly. Jazz sank down, looked at him, answer on his face.

Just once, Bee thought, I want someone to say yes, so the rest of us can see that it's possible.

"I miss him." Jazz said softly.

"Him?" Bee asked, even quieter.

He wanted to tell Jazz that even though Prowl was gone, Ironhide wasn't. He wasn't. And unless Jazz saw that, he could be.

"Yeah." Jazz hung his head, "so much."

There were footsteps, neither turned.

"Hey, Jazzy."

Not a sparkbeat later, Jazz had bolted over to fling his arms around Ironhide, to fall against him, whispering words only Ironhide could hear, that made Ironhide kiss him and say something, even quieter.

Bee didn't have to wonder just who Jazz had been missing the most.

And later, trying to stay strong even as Sam's pain continued to reverberate through their bond, Bee focused on words he could give to Sam, because Sam had to be there in the end.

The absorption spectra: The absorption spectra of something reveals what it is made of. The elements of a gas or liquid can be identified through its absorption spectra, revealing what is present, how these factors are combined, and the environment they are in. The absorption spectra shows what it is made of, to help identify exactly what "it" is.

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Hope everyone liked that!

Please review!!

Love ya,

Sunshine