Thank you all for the wonderful reviews, follows and favorites. I feel very guilty about not having time to respond to each and every one of you as I used to, but life has put a platter's worth of stuff on my tiny little plate. Please know how much it means to me to hear your feedback. I truly appreciate it!

Warning: minor spoiler to White Lines 06x11! And then an allusion to an incident I made up in my head.

Also a great big thank you to Cumberland River Relic and Make-Mine-A-Kiaora, two wonderful writers who are such a big help in keeping me going with this story. They're both on my favorite authors list; you should check 'em out! Seriously! :)

As much as I would LOVE to, I don't own the characters or the concept of The Mentalist and am making no money from writing these stories. Hope you enjoy.

Chapter 4: For the Love of Trouble

It wasn't a question as much as a demand. A demand by someone accustomed to being obeyed without hesitation.

Even if the briefing in Austin hadn't included photos of Roberta and Franklin Laduree, Lisbon would have had no trouble identifying the raging politician and her husband. They stomped into the room accompanied by their entourage of one bodyguard and three personal assistants.

"Well?"

As Lisbon formed a response, Fischer stepped up.

"I'm Special Agent Fischer of the FBI's Austin office. Special Agent Lochner of the Denver office called us in to help with this investigation." She offered her hand. "You are Carrie Laduree's parents, I presume?"

Mrs. Laduree, a petite, slender blonde with a battle-axe face, crossed her arms and glared up at Fischer.

"And what has your investigation determined so far?"

Jane preempted Fischer's response with his own, stepping forward to interject his presence into the conversation. "It's an ongoing investigation and can't be discussed with family members. When did you last speak with your precious Carrie?"

The glare on the congresswoman's face dropped for only a millisecond but resumed with double ferocity as it turned on Jane.

"And who are you?"

It was just the sort of tone that Lisbon expected to bring out the worst in her consultant…except it wasn't her problem anymore. Still, Lisbon knew better than to smirk in front of the congresswoman. She set her expression into careful neutrality as she listened.

"Me?" Jane graced her with his nearly-drunk-frat-boy smile reminiscent of the Yao Ming 'Bitch Please' meme. "I'm the waste of taxpayer dollars that your campaign manager has your ghost-writer constantly rail against in your op-ed pieces." Then his expression went cold and hard. "But I'm also the one who will find out what happened with…your…daughter."

The woman was apoplectic, unable to respond. Jane turned away slowly, tapping his lips with a single finger.

"And I use the term 'daughter' loosely." He looked sharply at the couple. "Since she's not really yours, is she?"

Lisbon thought one of the entourage should prepare to catch the husband, based on the way his color drained and his body swayed a little. It was then that Lisbon noticed how shaggy Mr. Laduree looked generally. His weak chin was covered in 24 hours' worth of beard growth and his thinning medium-length salt-and-pepper hair was disheveled and slightly oily, like he hadn't showered either.

It was funny to Lisbon. Mrs. Laduree looked more put together and better prepared than her husband did. Did she have something to do with the girl's disappearance?

Jane continued, giving the congresswoman a level stare. "I mean, you're connected with a House Armed Services subcommittee. I would think that if she were your own flesh and blood, a call to the Pentagon would have gotten you a flight last night, bringing you directly here from Andrews Air Force Base. Instead you caught a commercial flight – not the first one, at that. There were other flights, weren't there? I would think that if you really love someone and are desperate about her safety, you'd make every effort to get here as quickly as possible, even borrowing a private jet from one of your corporate sponsors."

He turned back. There was that twinkle in his eye that Teresa Lisbon knew always preceded trouble. "But no… No, there were two reasons you couldn't leave Washington last night. The first of course being that you didn't care enough. She isn't your blood, after all. The second was that you had no idea where your husband was, did you? He was off philandering and had powered down his cellphone. You couldn't reach him until this morning to tell him that Carrie had vanished."

Mrs. Laduree's tiny frame trembled from her dyed blonde hair to her rubber overshoes. Her hands clenched into seething balls at her side as if in preparation. Lisbon was certain there was a slug in Jane's future, not a slap as usually came from women he'd enraged. Served him right, as far as Lisbon was concerned.

But then the old political hack took a deep breath, the shake in her shoulders dissipating with the huge exhale that followed. Her fists released and she waggled her fingers to let the blood back in.

Jane's smug expression turned into a sincere smile.

"That's better," he said. "This investigation can only proceed if we have the absolute truth from you. She's not your daughter, although she is your husband's, possibly from an illicit affair while you both were in college…or a little after based on Carrie's age. You were building your political career and wanted to avoid scandal. Your husband's mistress at the time wouldn't get an abortion and he couldn't bear to have his child raised by the woman who'd given birth to her. The mistress was…underage? A drug addict? Not of the right social standing?"

He leaned aside to lock gazes with Mr. Laduree while gesturing toward the congresswoman.

"Remarkable how much she loves you, Frankie."

Franklin Laduree staggered one step sideways before the bodyguard caught him and put him back on his feet.

"Can we just get on with finding Carrie and her kidnappers?" Mrs. Laduree demanded.

Fischer opened her mouth to speak but only got as far as "Your-"

"We're waiting on a ransom demand and proof of life," Jane said quickly. "But in the meanwhile, perhaps you could make yourself available to Agent Lisbon and Agent Cho to answer a few standard questions about when you'd seen your daughter last and… how she's doing in school…How her mood has been, et cetera. The usual stuff."

He searched Lisbon's face until she gave him a tight nod. She wasn't entirely sure what his game was, but it was clear that he wanted her to keep them occupied. He turned back to the parents.

"Just who the hell are you?" Mr. Laduree demanded.

"Me? I'm a consultant….The consultant."

He turned away, motioning for Fischer and Lochlan to follow. Barely missing a beat, Lisbon smiled politely at the Ladurees and requested they join her at a small table nearby, allowing them to lead the way. With an impatient gesture, Mrs. Laduree ordered the entourage to wait for them outside the security office, then strode toward the table.

In annoyance, Lisbon looked towards Jane.

At that moment, he looked back and smiled. It was that golden expression, the one announcing everything was going his way, exactly as he'd planned it. She shook her head and followed Cho.

I wish I had half his confidence. Cheeky bastard.

Jane enjoyed Lisbon's wry smile as she turned away.

Encouraging. Maybe he did annoy her with his quirky antics, but she was most definitely amused.

Somehow he needed to get that amusement transposed into a different display of affection. Oh, she loved him, all right, but with his track record of twisting his way past touchy emotions like a snake in seizure, there was no way in hell she'd ever admit it, especially to herself. Once she did, she'd have no choice but to act on it. It was her honest nature.

Suppressing a sigh, he continued to where Lochlan and Fischer waited for him. He couldn't blame Lisbon for being in denial. If he were in love with someone as manipulative and deceiving as he was, he'd never admit it to himself either. And Lisbon knew all too well that the broken don't get better just by loving them.

"Jane," Fischer said firmly. "What the hell was that about? Why didn't you tell them that Carrie wasn't kidnapped? That instead she'd snuck away?"

"Hm? Oh…um…because sometimes telling a lie gets you closer to the truth."

Lochlan reared back with impatient disbelief. In a deep whisper, probably to keep the Ladurees from hearing, he said, "Agent Fischer, my regional director called in your unit because the Washington bureau assured us that you'd get this wrapped up quickly, not because we needed a vaudeville act to entertain us while we waited for the kidnappers to kill Rep Laduree's daughter!"

"She wasn't kidnapped," Fischer said.

"Lured away, then!" Lochlan hissed.

"A spoiled college student ran off in order to spite her overbearing and uncaring parents," she said to Jane, indicating he should follow her as they moved away from where the interview of the parents was taking place. "What other truth are you aiming for?"

"A spoiled college student went through the effort of making her disappearance a mystery," Jane said. "Why take even five minutes to get into a disguise? Why didn't she just run instead? And the best friend acted surprised when there hasn't been a ransom demand already. When was she expecting it to arrive? No, this isn't going according to the plan Synthea was told. There's more here than a simple rebellion against authority."

"What about those Virginia plates you just pulled out of your ass?" Lochlan demanded.

"What about them?" Jane asked seriously. "Can we get Vail PD to stop trucks with those plates? Also, maybe an area gas station caught our truck on security video."

"The local police shut down the valley in a three mile radius starting last night," Lochlan said. "They didn't have a vehicle to look for at the time. Only the girl's photo ID image. So far nothing."

"I got them started looking for the dark pickup truck the moment we saw it in the video. Lochlan? Have them stop any vehicle at all that has Virginia or West Virginia plates. And maybe even Kentucky and Maryland for good measure. Have them start checking convenience stores and gas stations as well."

Flashing Jane a dirty look, Lochlan departed.

"That's a good start, anyway," Jane said, "since we don't have much else. It has to be worth a try. She obviously needed help getting away, so why not someone from school? Oh, and I'd recommend confiscating both Bobbie's and Frankie's phones in the name of handling the kidnapping. Find out who they've been calling if you can. Despite them making a show of being outraged at my exposing their true relationship, I still sensed a lot of deception in both of them."

After all these weeks of working together proving his track record, he'd hoped she'd gotten over her shyness about minor infractions of the rules. Instead Fischer looked at him with complete disbelief.

"You want me to invade the privacy of a US Congressional member."

Jane shrugged in response.

"Do you think a US Congressional member would stop the FBI from invading yours, if necessary?"

She took a deep breath and turned her eyes to the ceiling. He smiled when her shoulders dropped in defeat.

"I'll see what I can do." Then she stared hard at him again. "Now…who is Badass Possum Pie Eater?"

Sometimes the thought crossed Lisbon's mind that her true purpose with the FBI wasn't as a damned good cop (which she was) or as an interpreter between Jane and Abbott (which she also was.) No, her bigger role was the official Jane Victim Ruffled Feather Smoother. Many years of working with him made her a uniquely qualified expert at it.

Cho followed the standard "parents of kidnapped/murdered child" questioning protocol while giving no indication of what the video showed. Lisbon interjected assurances of Jane's expertise and the FBI's intention to treat the case seriously. It was the usual script: 'no resource spared', 'complete dedication', 'safety of child, first and foremost'.

Beneath the platitudes, Lisbon's cop instinct was buzzing. Rep. Laduree and Mr. Laduree had a strange aura about them, like they were taking turns caring about what they told. As much as Lisbon had learned from Jane about human behavior, she wasn't nearly as good with interpreting kinesics as she felt she probably should be.

As Mr. Laduree was telling of the numerous academic awards Carrie had won throughout high school and her brilliant co-captaincy of the cheerleading squad, Lisbon met Cho's gaze. His expression reflected her suspicions. Normally Jane was the first to offer full disclosure to parents, something Lisbon attributed to his tragic history as a father of a murder victim. In this case, Jane had made a point of not sharing that their daughter wasn't kidnapped but had run away.

And Fischer had almost blown it twice in less than ten minutes. Sometimes the senior agent's lack of comprehension was infuriating. What was it with her unprofessionalism? Jane had told Lisbon about Fischer speaking freely in front of witnesses and suspects on more than one occasion. Sometimes Jane turned it to his advantage, such as when he read on Krystal Markham's face where the DEA murderers were. Other times, there was no recovering from the leggy brunette's diarrhea of the mouth, such as when she mentioned in front of a suspect about the chemical traces found in the basement of the victim's house. It completely destroyed Jane's trap to catch the guy. After that it took two weeks to find him after he fled.

"Logan?" Frank Laduree asked.

Something about the tone of his voice jarred Lisbon from the growing irritation created by remembering the Byers bombing in Radcliff, Kentucky. Talk about unprofessional! She really needed to remain in the present and pay attention. Sitting up straighter, she looked at the father of the…victim, for want of a better word. His complexion seemed even paler.

Mr. Laduree continued. "Logan Wells is the best thing to come into Carrie's life. He took care of her. We never had to worry about her when she was with Logan."

It was a poor performance, Lisbon thought. Mr. Laduree allowed his voice to rise while his clasped hands pushed forward on the table before him. Over all, he seemed a little too enthusiastic about Carrie's East Coast Prep boyfriend. Lisbon glanced at the congresswoman. The battle-axe face was twisted and strained. Was it because of the relationship with her non-daughter?

Or with her husband?

One thing that had been evident, there was no love lost between this couple. Jane's sarcasm may have gone over the heads of Fischer and Lochlan, but he most definitely knew they were not in love. Possibly never had been. The case file reflected a long marriage unmarked by legal separation or public discord, with plenty of shared projects and contributions to charity. It looked good on paper.

The two people in front of her told a completely different story. Granted, they had been married a long time and that could be why the glow was gone. But Lisbon doubted it. And if Jane was right that Franklin Laduree had spent the night with a mistress…

"How long have Carrie and Logan been seeing each other?" Cho asked.

For the first time Roberta Laduree appeared uncertain but Frank spoke almost immediately. "Four months."

"Did they know each other before going to Washington & Lee University?" Lisbon asked.

"No, they met there," Mr. Laduree said. "They had many of the same classes because they're both computer majors. Carrie's a-a-a quiet girl… and I guess she felt comfortable with him. She never had a steady beau growing up in Idaho before she attended prep school."

A cheerleader without a steady boyfriend? That doesn't sound like any cheerleader I ever met...except when she was a slut and had many boyfriends. Lisbon glanced at Cho before asking her next question. He didn't look back. "And what about going to college? Did she like it in Virginia? It's so different from Idaho or…" She consulted her notes. "Or the prep school in Oregon."

"Fine," Representative Laduree said. The chill in her tone could have cryopreserved Walt Disney all over again. "She liked Washington & Lee just fine. Why do you ask? I don't believe it is pertinent to the situation."

"These are standard questions, ma'am," Cho said. "Just trying to get a complete picture of our victim. Now, in the last couple of days, have either of you received any unexplained phone calls, texts or emails? Sometimes kidnappers will test the line of communication ahead of time as part of the planning protocol."

For a moment, Mr. Laduree froze in his seat. If it hadn't been for years of exposure to Jane's methodology, Lisbon might not have thought twice about it.

Cho leaned forward.

"Anything at all. A hang up. A wrong number. A blank text…"

"Not that I can recall. You, Franklin?"

"Uh...yeah, I think I did get one or two." He then blurted, "But you can call my office where most of my phone calls and emails get routed."

"We'll do that," Cho said. He glanced over Mr. Laduree's shoulder and closed his notebook. "Well, I think we're done here. Agent Fischer would like us to join them now."

Lisbon looked over to see Kim Fischer looking at them with raised brows, giving a little nod. Beyond her, Jane sat on a bench, adjusting his new boots and grinning. Trying to contain a deep sigh, Lisbon rose to her feet and gestured for the Ladurees to head toward Fischer, which they did.

"Mrs Laduree? Mr. Laduree? We're going to take you to… to the facilities we're using as our HQ here in Vail. We'll try to make you comfortable while we're waiting for some sort of contact with Carrie's kidnapper or kidnappers. If you'll come with us, please?"

Carrie's parents followed Fischer as she started for the exit. Lisbon hung back until Cho caught up to her.

"What was that crap about a wrong number?" she murmured for fear of being overheard. "I've never heard of kidnappers doing that."

Again, Cho almost smiled. Or rather, he lost some of the frown that had formed about the time of Mrs. Laduree's arrogant verbal assault.

"No…I've never heard of that either. It was a test. There's something not right about this weird little rich family."

She stared at his face while he watched Fischer soothing residual ruffled feathers. Cho was right, of course. Adult children generally don't 'run away' from their parents, and parents don't try to go along with the concept that their children have been kidnapped. There was always the standard Five Stages of Grief, albeit rapidly cycled through. These folks had the anger part down pat, and Mr. Laduree's wistful reminiscence of his daughter could have been interpreted as depression, but neither parents denied the idea of a kidnapping or made any of the usual "give them anything they want" demonstrations. They went straight to acceptance from there, bouncing back up to anger.

It was evident that Jane was right about Mrs. Laduree's lack of caring for what was technically her step-daughter, but if the father had gone through all that to retain his bastard child, he should have displayed some angst. Or at least some sort of caring. Instead he only showed a desire to get along and cooperate completely.

It was a very odd situation.

To be continued

A/N: gawd, I can't wait for this hiatus to be over!