Authors Note: Loving being apart of the Faberry Fandom! And after being well and truly reprimanded (thank you anonythemouse), instead of asking whether you guys want more updates I'll just leave you with an idea of whats to come in the next chapter! :)
Next Chapter: Rachel discovers Quinn's love for photography, Santana makes a re-appearance and Sue struggles to make the most of her time.
Chapter Four: Heaven on Earth
Heaven on earth.
It's a funny concept to consider really. I always thought it to be one of those throw away clichés that you see in hallmark cards or bad rom-coms. I'm a hopeless romantic, don't get me wrong, but I'm not naive.
Then I lived in my very own hell on earth. So now I figure it's only fair that there's a literal heaven out there somewhere. If there's not, well, there's no hope for me after my twenty four hours with Quinn expires.
But in this moment. Right now. I've found my heaven.
Curled up in Quinn Fabray's gentle arms (and her legs too), I can safely say that I have my version of Eden.
I can feel her pulse dancing against my fingertips. I can hear her delicious heartbeat echoing in my eardrum. I would happily go deaf listening to the glorious beat that keeps her alive.
She had scooped me up off the ground not too long ago. Lifting me from our huddled mess and carrying me like her newly wedded bride until she had found my bedroom. Then she had laid me down with such delicacy, such tenderness. She had brushed a runaway hair off of my face and taken me into her arms.
Clothes had been forgotten. Well my clothes anyway. She hadn't bothered to hand me back my bra and shirt and I didn't care to ask for it.
Being this exposed to another human-being would usually have me cowering away like a small child – I've always had an issue with my body image. But with Quinn it's different. It's always been different with her. She's mine and I'm hers.
So letting her see me like this, so without care and restraint. Well...it feels like singing. Like when I sing in front of crowds of people. It's liberating.
"Rachel?" So husky and beautiful.
"Hmm." I flex my hold on her body.
"I'm sorry about what ever Santana said. She had no right and –" I tighten my legs against hers to make her stop.
"She loves you sweetie. Don't apologize for that." I get a gentle rub of her thumb against my back and I purr into her neck.
"Was it bad?"
"Not at all Quinn. You satisfied me –"
"Rachel!" I'm reprimanded with a tight body squeeze and her childish giggles. Hardly a punishment.
"She was perfect actually. She gets it Quinn. You're my Brittany." I say it quietly. Knowing my confession will make this more concrete for Quinn. I feel her stiffen under me. Then...
Silence.
She rolls me slowly onto my back until she's hovering over me. A pink dusting sprinkles down her neck. Her hazel eyes glisten with the unsaid love sonnets of her favourite poets. Her throat convulses as she seeks the words she cherishes so dearly. This has got to be the eighth wonder of the world.
"You mean that?" She's so timid. She's so unsure and it steals away another piece of my already fragmented heart.
"I have never been more certain." I feel like it's not enough. But on such short notice, it's the best sentence I can strangle together.
She ducks her head onto my bare chest. It's an awkward angle so I kick her leg, or was that my leg? It's hard to tell whose is whose at this point. I kick out again and this time she rolls her entire body onto mine. Heavenly.
She lays her hand flat against my chest and splays her fingers out possessively. I puff out my chest at the sight. She ducks her head and rests her chin upon her outstretched hand. It's adorable. In that moment she reminds me of a child. Seeking comfort from something as organic as skin on skin. It's refreshing.
"I'm not used to being loved like this." Her words are soft. Honest, painfully so.
"Like how?" She doesn't want hollow comfort from me. We are more than that. She just wants to talk without the fear of being judged.
"So - without restraint. Or - or without any judgement. It's - I've never - it's just there." I watch her eyebrows quirk upon her little epiphany. I wait.
"You just do. Because you don't know how not to. It's – this is foreign to me." She lets out a breath and turns her head to the side.
Seeing Quinn Fabray nestled between my breasts is certainly a sight to behold. I run my hand through her hair. Just to remind her that I'm here and that I'm listening.
"What if I'm not good at it?" That strikes something in me. My eyes shoot open and I tug gently on those golden locks. Her eyes slowly travel up my body until they reach my own.
"What did you just say?" She looks embarrassed.
"What if I'm not good at loving you?"
Silence.
I'm stunned. Well and truly baffled. This beautifully broken woman seriously doubts her ability to love. What kind of malicious bastards have made her feel like this? Who would put that kind of toxic thinking into her beautiful head? I swear to god – sniff.
That snaps up my attention. Tears are slowly dripping onto my chest. I would have taken a moment to revel in this beautiful display of intimacy but my baby just looks so hurt. I've never seen her look so small and afraid. Not even in the hallway after I had revealed Beth's true paternity.
"Oh honey." I pull at her hips and she all but scrambles to move up my body.
"You look at me, Lucy Quinn." So does so dutifully.
"You loved Beth enough to give her a better life. You loved Noah enough not to make him a daddy. You love Santana and Brittany so fiercely. Even Sue, she's so special to you. And you've being loving me since freshman year. You love so perfectly Quinn. It's so special." I pull her face closer until her forehead is resting against mine.
"You're love is soft and gentle but always...always present Quinn. It makes me feel so beautiful. So absolutely cherished." I pull her into a soft yet slightly demanding kiss. She burrows into me, clawing at my skin slightly.
I pull away gently when I taste an onslaught of salt. She's still crying. With such grace and poise. I've never found her more beautiful. In all her imperfections and deepest fears I find a woman so selfless and so loving that it's almost difficult to comprehend.
I grab her by the chin and force eye contact again.
"Okay?" I need conformation that I got through to her.
She takes her time pondering my question but then her lips are pressed gently against mine. I feel her breathy 'okay' more than I hear it, which is just fine by me.
We've been basking in silence for a while now. I can feel her muscles twitching against my body and I just know that she's dying to say something. I know that we kind of got ahead of ourselves down stairs but I'm starting to think that maybe she's having regrets?
I turn my head slightly to the left and catch sight of my bedside alarm clock. I hate clock-watching in general but my situation sort of demands it of me. It reads 7.42pm. Christ. That means my dads are ganna be home soon and we've being laying up here for almost two hours. I didn't even realise.
I'm wasting away my time with her.
I only have twenty four hours and I'm lying here like I don't give a shit.
I'm letting her fidget about something that's obviously bothering her and not doing anything about it.
Fuck.
Santana's going to kill me. That thought resonates with me somehow and I look down to the beautiful woman wrapped around me. She's still fidgeting. That simply won't do.
"Quinn."
"Hmm." She burrows in deeper into my chest.
"Sweetie, if there's something on your mind then you can talk to me about it." I feel her fingers rubbing gentle circles around my navel. Like she's trying to distract herself from what she wants to say.
"There is." Her breathy words spill out against my skin. I wait for more.
"I just don't wanna break this spell Rach. This is so perfect and I just don't wanna ruin it."
"Impossible."
"Promise?" She dips her finger into my belly-button and my breath hitches. I feel her smirk against me and can't help but draw her gaze up to mine.
"I promise. Now tell me what's going on in that beautiful head of yours." She blushes at my words. I'll never get tired of causing the soft pink haze that runs across her cheeks.
"It's about Finn, Rach."
Gross. So not what I was expecting.
"Argh Gross. What about him?" I feel my face sneer at the mention of his name. Looks like I still hate him – no surprise really. A part of me will forever harbour a deep resentment for the boy.
"Don't mock me Rachel." I feel the coldness in Quinn's voice and watch in shock as she shifts away from me. The surprise is obviously evident on my face.
"You know, Finn? The tall, dopey, man child you're in love with. Your fiancé! Ringing any bells yet Rachel?" I watch in shock. Shit. Fiancé. Forgot about that.
Quinn's furious. She had jumped away from her place on top of me like I had burned her skin. Now she's pacing back and forth across my room in a flurry. She's breathing heavily and her cheeks are flushed with an angry pink. Her hands are flailing all over the place and messing up her hair. Her hazel glare is nothing short of wild. I would've thought she was incredibly sexy if I didn't notice how scared she seemed. She's radiating so much fear and it makes my heart ache for her.
I had fully forgotten that Finn existed. The moment I had seen Quinn alive and in front of me nothing else had mattered. The fact that I still had a fiancé was the last thought on my mind.
"Quinn –"
"I mean what is this Rachel? Some last minute fling before you march down the aisle? Because I swear to god I will castrate him before I watch you marry Finn Hudson." Tears are spilling down her cheeks. I don't even think she's noticed yet.
She takes a moment to collect herself before turning to face me again.
"Rachel –" She walks to where I am now perched on the edge of my bed.
She sinks to her knees and slips between my dangling legs. Her hands grasp for my hips. She pulls me roughly, harshly, until I am flushed against her stomach. My breath hitches on instinct. She runs her hands up my bare sides and nuzzles her head into my breasts. I feel her tongue flick out against my nipple and then it's gone.
"Rachel –" Her voice is thick. Husky again. I snap my neck down to meet her gaze.
"If this is a one night thing. Then tell me now so I can be prepared for tomorrow." A silent tear stretches down her cheek. I catch it with my thumb as my shoulders convulse with a quiet sob.
How does she not know what she means to me?
She means everything to me. Everything.
"Quinn –" I grab her face and pull her closer. I feel her body jerk into me. Her hands are clawing at my shoulder blades. She's greedy for my flesh and I adore it.
"You are not a one night thing. You're everything –" Her breath hitches.
"Finn Hudson is nothing as far as I'm concerned. My ridiculous engagement to him will be reduced to nothing more than an embarrassing snippet in a future biography of Rachel Berry: The Making of a Star." I watch Quinn chuckle into my hand. Her cheeks burst into a full-blown smile that she reserves just for me.
"You mean that?"
"Completely. But as for the fiancé thing –" I watch her eyes widen with apprehension. So naturally I pause for dramatic effect – I am still Rachel Berry after all.
"I'll reserve that honour for you. If you ever want it that is?" I smile at her cheekily despite the fact that I'm being completely honest. Her eyes widen again, this time with hope.
"You mean that?"
"Completely." She chuckles at our lame occurrence of de-ja-vu. I watch her chuckle turn into a soft smile and then into a gentle lip bite. She's processing everything I've just said. I sit patiently and give her a moment to find the right words.
"I applied to NYU as well." Wait. What? That's not...what?
"What?"
"I got accepted too." I see what she's doing.
She's planning our future.
Laying out a map of our lives in front of me. I can see it already: living together in New York, following our dreams, supporting each other, getting married, having babies, growing old together. It's a glorious picture she's painting. A future I know she'll never live. It makes my chin wobble instantly. Tears are falling before I know it. But when I look down into her hopeful eyes I know I can't deny her.
I'll promise her a happily ever after. This woman deserves to know true happiness. It's the least I can give her, even though I know she's got just over a week to live. My shoulders sob and I force a heavy breath through my body. I will find the strength to do this.
"Quinn –" My voice is chocking on me.
"I know Rach. But if we're doing this – like really doing this...then I need to be with you. Not seventy something miles away in New Haven."
"But Quinn. Yale – it's your dream." My sentences are disjointed and she chuckles to herself slightly.
"You're my dream Rachel." I know I'm shaking when I feel Quinn rubbing soothing circles along my back.
"I can study English anywhere. But you're meant for Broadway and New York and I would be so completely honoured to share that with you." God. This woman! My chest heaves again.
"You'd move to New York for me?"
"In a heartbeat." And then I forget.
I forget about my expiring time and about Sue Sylvester and Finn 'fucking' Hudson and car crashes and I just see Quinn. Quinn and all she is. So I do the only reasonable thing that comes to my mind. I wrap my legs around her. Pull her close. And attack her lips in a kiss that promises nothing but a doomed future.
She moans against me. It's feral and passionate and I love it. Her nails claw down my bare back and grab roughly at my hips. She's fierce and I know immediately that I'm about to be fucked somewhat savagely.
She pushes up from her position on floor and throws me back against my bed by grabbing at my legs. She throws her body against mine in a delicious haze of lust. She bites along my collar bone without apology and I can only fist at her hair. Her rugged voice growls 'up' and I lift my hips so that she can do away with my skirt and panties. I lay myself bare for her.
She wastes no time in cupping my bare mound. She moans into my mouth and nips at my lips. My hands find the hem of her shirt. Her hand is ripped from my sex as I tear her shirt from her body. Her bra is gone a split second later. I pull her body to mine and we groan as our breasts clash in harmony together.
"Fuck Quinn." She groans back and grinds against.
I let my hands fall to the buttons of her jeans and make quick work of the zip. Ready to push the denim and delicate lace of panties away from her skin, I feel a penetrating suck against my neck. It rocks my body off the bed and my hands fly to Quinn's back.
She grabs at my arms and forces them into the mattress. She's delicate and direct with me all at once. She grips her nails into my wrists. Holding me in place. Then she thrusts into me. Hard. Fiercely. I buck into her. She moves her hips in delicious circles and coaxes me into the same rhythm. I feel my body arching into her bare chest. She bites at my ear lobe to get my attention.
"Now let me fuck you baby." It's the first time she's called me by a pet-name. But I can't bring myself to care because I am soaked for her.
Her voice is husky. Dripping with sex. I clench my thighs at her tone. Her demand has me shivering. I can feel my wet heat sinking into the sheets.
"Ohhh Qu-Quinnnn." She pushes my wrists deeper into the mattress. Thrusting against me again. She wants my permission.
"Fuck me Quinn. Plea-please." She nips my ear lobe again and shifts her hips to make room for her hand.
She finds my clit like it was made for her. I like to think that it was. She's ruthless in her attack. Working me up with deep circles until I'm about to topple over the edge. She slows and dips her finger through the abundance of wetness waiting for her.
"Sooooo wet." Her words send a ripple through me. She hums in recognition.
"You like that baby?" I answer her with a nip of my teeth to her shoulder.
"I can't wait to be inside you –" Her fingers circle my entrance. I buck against her in desperation.
"To feel how tight and hot you are for me –" She dips her finger in slightly.
"To have your walls tighten against me –" I feel one slender finger press into me. Deep. So so incredibly deep.
"God you feel good. Just wait until I start fucking you baby. Till I stretch you just a little bit more –" She retracts her entire finger. I groan in frustration. Then without warning she buries herself in me. Her finger width has doubled and I scream against her neck.
"So so tight. I bet I can make you tighter –" Her fingers flick out inside me. Pressing against the ridges in my walls. I quiver against her. I'm at her mercy. And then she's moving in and out. Slowly. The pleasure is excruciating.
"I'm ganna fuck you until you scream my name Rach –" She thrusts in deeper. She's pumping into me harder. Faster. With more force. My legs are quivering around her waist. I can hear my whispered 'fucks' and 'harder's' swirling around me.
"Your ganna see stars baby. Fuck your tight –" I clench around her. I hear the words 'I'm so close Quinn,' but they don't feel like mine. I'm falling into a Quinn-stupor.
"You're getting close aren't you? Cum for me. Clamp around me and scream my name –" The loud slap of her hand against my sex vibrates up my body. Her fingers can barely move I'm so tight.
"Cum for me –" Her fingers thrust deep and find my trigger. I drench her fingers and hold them captive. I feel my back arch of the bed. Her name rips from my lungs. My legs are quivering as my hips fly into frenzy against her fingers.
I briefly note that she shudders on top of me until I slip into a welcoming oblivion.
Stars like I have never seen surround me.
Whispers of love float over me.
A fullness I've never known slowly slips away.
And then I'm blinking back to life and her hazel eyes are waiting for me.
Her thumbs are ghosting down my cheeks. I feel the wetness there but don't fully register that they're my tears. Then I'm smiling up at Quinn and she's grinning back. She looks rather smug with herself – and for good reason too. This woman is a goddess in bed!
"There you are." I blush and nod. I'm rewarded with a gentle brush of her lips.
"I'll take that as a yes then?"
"Huh?"
"You. Me. New York." I smile and capture her lips again.
"I wouldn't want it any other way." I'm about to be rewarded with another kiss until...
Knock. Knock. Knock.
"Rachel darling. Family meeting in five. Bring Quinn."
Oh. My. Barbra.
Stupid cock-blocking Dads.
I feel Quinn's forehead smack against my collar bone. I hear a muffled 'this cannot be happening' and then she's off me and dancing around the room in a rush to get dressed. I lean against my headboard and watch on in amusement. She trips over herself as she tries to button her jeans and put on her shirt at the same time. I laugh out loud – I can't help it. She looks adorable.
"Why are you laughing? You parents just heard us having sex – sex Rachel! Fuck. They're ganna kill me –"
"Quinn don't be silly. They've only been home for –" I quickly glance at my bedside clock. It reads 8.20pm. Shit.
"Oh they've been home for twenty minutes. So yes they heard us having sex but my rooms partially sound-proof so they just would've heard me screaming your name and –"
"Partially sound proof! Fuck! Rachel. I'm so dead. This is –"
"Really Quinn this isn't a big deal. We'll just have a frank and honest discussion with my dads and that will be it." I glance in Quinn's direction as I finally find my skirt. She looks...well scared shitless.
"Look sweetie. My parents aren't like yours okay? My dads are open to sexuality, obviously, and they respect that a healthy relationship involves sex. I also suspect that they'll take to you quiet fondly because you're not Finn." I shoot her a cheeky grin and am rewarded with a Quinn Fabray smirk.
I move towards my door and open it gently. I can hear my dads moving around down stairs, probably making coffee and vegan hot chocolate that had become a tradition during Berry family meetings. I turn to look at Quinn and see that she's more at ease. I reach out my hand and watch as she walks forward to take it proudly. Then she presses a kiss to my cheek and leads the way down to my kitchen.
"Dads?" I call the attention of my father's as Quinn and I make our grand entrance. Fingers intertwined.
"Ah you finally grace us with your presence." I see my dads share a quiet giggle and move to take a seat at the kitchen table. I pull Quinn along to do the same.
"Good to see you again Quinn." I feel her tense against me. I squeeze her had gently as we both take a seat.
"You too Mr Berry." She extends her hand for my daddy to shake. So chivalrous.
"Ah-uh Quinn. Not too sure where that's been." My daddy chuckles at his joke and my dad swats at him gently. I duck my head with a smirk and Quinn turns a pretty shade of pink.
"And none of that Mr. Berry stuff Quinn. He's my father in law and quite frankly he scares the shit out of me. So it's Leroy and Hiram to you okay." My daddy is smiling gently, his dark skin highlighting his smile lines. Quinn nods and mumbles a 'yes Leroy,' then ducks her head again.
"So when did all this happen?" My dad, ever the articulate one, waves his hands between Quinn and me.
"What ever do you mean father?" I know I have a flare for the dramatic and my dads love me for it.
We always have appreciated humour in awkward situations. While my dads let out gentle chuckles I hear Quinn gasp. I'm reprimanded with her fingernails digging into the palms of my hand. She's blushing furiously so I figure I should make this conversation as painless as possible.
"Okay dads. Quinn and I love one another. We've always shared this intensely deep connection and it finally came into fruition this afternoon. So naturally our pent up sexual desires for –"
"Rachel!" She whispers it harshly in my direction.
"each other resulted in us making love. We intend to move to New York together –" that certainly gathered my dads attention.
"Quinn was accepted into NYU and Yale. She's decided to follow me to New York so that we can build a life together." I turn to look at Quinn. She's staring at me in awe, it makes me feel bulletproof.
"Questions?" I look to both my dads and wait patiently.
"You're willing to follow her to New York? To support her with Broadway and love her when she goes diva-crazy. Over Yale?" It's my dad that spoke up. He's looking directly at Quinn. Probing for some kind of fault that he won't find.
"I'd follow her anywhere Mr. Be – Hiram. I'm in love with your daughter because it's the most effortless thing I've ever known. So Yale could never really compare."
Silence.
Could she be more perfect? I'm only broken out of my Quinn-trance when I hear my daddy squeal. We all share hugs and I hear my dad whisper 'welcome to the family,' when he embraces Quinn. When I finally have her back at my side her hazel eyes are veiled with unshed tears. She whispers a 'thank you,' and I excuse us back up to my room.
As we leave I hear the voice of my daddy mumble 'good riddance Finn,' and then the distinct sound of a high-five. Quinn smiles, kisses my temple and murmurs 'your dads are so cool.' I think she's probably right.
Eventually we collapse onto my bed in a huddle of limbs. Her hands immediately seek out my skin and I move to cuddle into her. She nuzzles her lips into my hair and I close my eyes to revel in the feeling of been held by Quinn Fabray.
Yup. I was right.
She really is my heaven on earth.
I make a quick glance for my clock. 9.02pm. I'm running out of time.
Time check: Eighteen hours and fifty eight minutes remaining.