Attack of the Killer Death Squirrel!
Chapter Three: A Nun On A Railgun!
Eventually Anti-Skill had released the young Level 5, but that much was obvious (seeing as she could easily escape if she wanted to) and they had even gotten a good laugh when her dorm's supervisor had come to pick the girl up and swiftly snap her neck and drag her corpse to the car.
She awoke the next day, apologized to Mitsuko, and cleaned the dormitory's bathrooms with the only other level 5 in Tokiwadai. As was her "punishment" for "assaulting" a ten year old.
Mikoto had showered and taken off in search of something to do. She noticed that Kuroko was missing but assumed it was probably due to Judgment work and ignored it, while wandering the streets aimlessly she noticed a flyer on the window of a certain ramen shop and let out a squeal, but quickly covered it up before anyone could notice (unknown to her, EVERYONE around her noticed) the flyer was announcing a ramen eating contest with the grand prize being a special Ramen Gekota! Hoping to make up for her lost the last time. Mikoto marched into the restaurant, fully confident in her ability to eat all the ramen.
Meanwhile a certain Accelerator was having his own set of problems…
As of now, he had stopped trying to wrap his mind on exactly how a squirrel had defeated him and decided to just hunt it down and kill it with as much explosive things he could find. But there were two problems,
The first was, all squirrels looked the same, while that squirrel may have looked different Last Order wouldn't be any help in identifying it, as she was still being depressed. But at this point it was more over her lost toy than him.
The second was, he had no idea where to start looking, and he refused to go back to the café.
So he was stuck on standby till Last Order could calm down enough to give him a description. It didn't help that WORST was still mocking him about losing to a squirrel.
But if the fucking brat didn't calm down soon, he'd go out there and kill all the squirrels he saw, PETA be dammed!
Back at the plot, our hero Misaka Mikoto was currently locked in a bathroom, emptying out her stomach due to the sheer amount of ramen she had consumed. Afterward she left the restaurant. Angry because she lost, embarrassed because she had threw up, and ashamed because she had been forced to pay for all the ramen she had eaten (and then…"un-eaten"). But she refused to let that get the better of her! She'd go back to the ramen stand and try again! However upon seeing a bowl of ramen, the girl felt sick to her stomach.
"It pisses me off!" the girl mumbled to herself, she decided to head to a certain vending machine to relive some stress, but it seemed like fate had other plans.
In the form of a nun who looked like she was trying to bite through metal.
"What are you doing?" the brown haired girl asked, giving the nun a blank look. The girl in question noticed her presence and cried out "ah short hair! What are you doing here?"
"I asked you first, and my names misaka mikoto!" Mikoto replied, the nun gestured at the cleaning bot, which she was currently attempting to strangle and responded "this thing stole my doughnut and I'm trying to get it back!"
"Why would you want a doughnut that fell on the floor…" the girl respond knowing full well that the robots only consumed things that hit the floor before remembering the girls eating ability "that doesn't matter, come with me!" she asked grabbing the nun by the arm and hauling her along.
"Wait my doughnut!" the girl cried as she was pulled away from the "evil" robot by her "rival"
Eventually both girls had calmed down enough for Mikoto to calmly explain the situation, and Index didn't mind, it was food after all. Besides, Touma hadn't fed her all day he wasn't even home when she woke up.
Also for reasons yet unknown, Touma was missing.
Alas, both girls made their way to the restaurant one was fully determined to obtain Gekota while the other was fully determined to obtain food.
The unholy alliance had been formed.
Meanwhile, another individual was facing his own crises…
=D= "you're not serious are you…"
D "I'm dead serious Kamijou Touma,"
D: "do you honestly expect me to believe that a squirrel could do that!"
O-O "…"
:( "…"
"yes?"
ToT "I'm hanging up."
"Kamijou I'm serious! The things a monster with powers beyond our level of understanding, had he been anywhere on the battlefield in world war 3 he could of dominated it in less than a minute!"
"Look Stiyl, it's not that what you're saying doesn't sound like complete and utter bullshit, well that's exactly what it sounds like, but I'm actually really busy at the moment!"
"What can be more important than saving the world from an evil killer death squirrel?!"
"Well…"
Suddenly the magician heard a very flirty voice on the other line.
"Kamijou-chwan~ cum out and play~"
Stiyl blinked
"With my body~"
Stiyl's eyes widen at what the mysterious (and oddly arousing) voice had said before shouting angry yet colorful words meant for the boy on the other line of the phone, however the boy had quickly hung upon fear that he would be found. The words Stiyl used however would make a certain Accelerator and Tayuya so motivated, moved and enlightened that they would of hooked up and created an entire army of evil little monsters from scratch.
Luckily, that didn't happen.
Mostly…
"Hey fucker, what was that you said about an all-powerful squirrel?"
Shinnypichu88's Author's note: well what do you think? good bad or so stupid that it made you die? next chapter the unholy alliance attempts to save a "princess" from a (possibly homosexual) man. Accelerator joins Stiyl on his journey to defeat a certain squirrel, and Touma gets involved in something that was clearly misunderstood.
also heres an omake based on what i saw from a few fans on fanfiction and 4chan!
Omake: The Toaru Fandom!
Index: I DON'T EXISTS!
Touma: I'M NOT DENSE!
Misaki: I'M AN INNOCENT MISUNDERSTOOD GIRL AND CLEARLY NOT A TOTAL TEASE WHO LOVES TO TORMENT A CERTAIN ELECTRO MASTER AND ANYONE ELSE WHO SHE SEES AS ANY SORT OF FRIEND!
I AM ALSO IN PERFECT SHAPE!
Mikoto: I AM A WEAK MINDED GIRL THAT CAN NEVER BE INDEPENDENT, OTHER TIMES I'M A TOTAL RAMPAGING BITCH THAT SHOOTS LIGHTNING CAPABLE OF KILLING PEOPLE FOR FUN, AND AT OTHER TIMES I ACT LIKE A SPOILED FIVE YEAR OLD!
I HAVE NO SENSE OF RESPONSIBILITY AND REFUSE TO KILL PEOPLE WITH MY POWERS!
Kuroko: I'M A PSYCHOTIC LESBO WHO DOESN'T EVEN DO HER OWN JOB RIGHT
"wait, aren't you a psychotic lesbo?"
"crazy and psychotic aren't the same thing you foolish little boy."
"okay..."
GUNHA: GUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUTS!
what was the point of this?
nothing really, i just wanted to send a message by over exaggerating traits characters are believed to have.
heres a fun game, try and find out what character isn't changed, the answers obvious but still...
also, i know not many people like Kamiko but the fact is that it's popular and mikoto's a popular character.
theres also the fact that the MAJORITY of Toaru fanfic writers ship that, sure there are a few stories like Had Circumstances Been Different, possibly A Certain World of Darkness (so i havn't read it yet, i 'm waiting for it to finish before i do, i hate cliff hangers okay, they make me ancious...) and What Once Was that feature different heroines (and possibly more, but you can find them on your own!) also, bashing a character won't make less stories of her come out. in fact it may even start a flame war...
and we don't want that now do we, it'll make us the same as Digimon, Shugo Chara, or Avatar The Last Airbender.
and we REALLY don't want that.
So i think we should all just relax, if you want a story that's not kamiko doesn't have parings, or doesn't feature mikoto at all...then you can be patient (or keep reading Attack Of The Killer Death Squirrel, this story won't have parings! (due to the fact that i don't think i can pull it off, and it's suppose to be a comedy)) or you can write one yourself. or maybe JUST maybe some author will offer up a challenge with the prize beingthat they will write a story for a fanfiction reader :D
Maybe...
Besides, maybe when Index 3 is out we'll see more Itsuwa stories (they say she's not a virgin, but it's most likely a troll...like the whole Last Order and Worst's feelings for Accelerator are fake thing...) and hopefully we'll stay a bash free community, wouldn't that be great?
well, Read and Review, sorry for the long note and slow update...schools been tough.
I'll also fix what ever mistakes i or you happen to find, till next time!