Surviving Death
In…
I breathed deeply–
Out…
–before exhaling slowly.
The colors before my eyes, the buzzing in my ears, the scent in my nose, the taste on my tongue, the shivers along my skin and the emotions resonating from within began to fade away.
First to go was the white, high-pitched, smoky, watery, wistful atmosphere.
Next was the brown, gentle, moist, spicy, warm, calm forest that surrounded me.
Then, I began to filter out the critters scampering across the soft ground, the birds flying through the open air, the herd of deer farther in, the pack of wolves off in the distance…
What had once preoccupied my senses so prevalently was now pushed into the background.
White, tinging, plum blossom, sweet, tingly and anxious brushed against me and I opened my eyes to look up and smile at her worried face, greeting lightly,
"Good evening, Mama. Are ya done for the night?"
Immediately, her brow smoothed out as she smiled back and knelt gracefully beside me, speaking softly, "I am, Ki-chan. Were you…meditating?"
I nodded and she relaxed, murmuring, "I'm glad… It really seems to help with your constitution." And then she paused, hesitating and looking greatly conflicted, but not speaking.
Confused, I nudged her knee and tilted my head in silent question.
For a moment, she didn't respond before she lifted a hand and caressed my cheek.
"Kira, I…" she trailed off and I was alarmed to find her chakra jumping from nervous to distressed.
Feeling concerned, I got to my knees and held her hands, whispering, "What's wrong, Mama…?"
She bit her lower lip and looked away and suddenly I was afraid as I wondered,
"Are you going away?"
Her eyes widened before she abruptly shook her head and I was relieved at the negative before asking, "If it's not that, then what's wrong?"
Another moment of silence passed as she rubbed my knuckles with her thumb, more to soothe herself than to assure me, before she finally mumbled,
"Kira, do you… Do you hate me…?"
I blinked, taken aback by her question, and she quickly explained, "That is, I…I-I'm not the best role model considering my…profession."
The meaning behind that word made her look away and her lips pursed as if she'd swallowed a particularly sour lemon and my heart tugged uncomfortably.
"…Why do you ask?" I returned her query with my own.
Her brows furrowed as she looked exasperated with my evasion and seemed to fight with herself for a moment or two before sighing, "It's just…for a few weeks now, you seemed…distant…up until a few days ago…"
And I paused in thought before tensing in remembrance.
Having learnt to traverse on my own, I padded quietly down the hall, ducking and dodging the random men that came and went from my home, in search of Mama.
She was working, I knew, but I wanted to show her the neat trick that I'd been taught by one of the ladies a while ago.
Besides, Iisaka said that it was fine.
That familiar tinging, white, sweet, shivering, scent of plum blossoms brushed against my senses and I perked up, honing in on her chakra before pausing just down the hall of where she was when I felt an unfamiliar coldness that was simultaneously hot emanating from her.
Biting the inside of my cheek, I hesitated.
She didn't feel like she was afraid or angry but rather…restless?
Tiptoeing closer, I crouched in the shadows and enhanced my hearing before freezing when I heard the low rumbling voice of an unknown man and my mother sounding like some airhead high on crack.
"Shall we move onto the main course," she purred, "Or would you like some more appetizers?"
And I froze as I finally took in the man's signature, feeling sick as I felt that burning and oily spark burst forth, and heard her giggle in that ridiculous way before–
"Oh, there you are, Kira-chan."
–I whirled around with wide eyes to see Iisaka standing before me.
"I was wondering where you were," she continued and gestured to the tray of food held in her hands, "Lunchtime's just about over but you weren't in the…"
She trailed off as a particularly loud laugh was heard through the door and realization dawned in her eyes before she grimaced with a regretful frown.
Balancing the tray on one hand, she rested her other hand on my shoulder and steered me away, speaking softly,
"I'm sorry, Kira-chan. I'd thought that she would be done by now…"
Two and a half weeks ago, I found out that Mama was an entertainer for male visitors.
Or, more bluntly stated, she was a prostitute.
As was Iisaka, whom I thought of as my older sister, along with all of those other women whom I thought of as my aunts or cousins or family in some way or shape.
And my home? The place where I'd been born and raised?
It was a brothel.
I'd felt so ashamed of it all that I ended up running away like a coward. Instead of confronting her, I'd chosen to stay on the outskirts of the forest to the north of town, fishing and gathering berries for food while sleeping in treetops, with nothing other than the clothes on my back. Had it not been for the summer season, then I would have had a much harder time staying there.
Regardless, the time I'd spent in the wilderness did help me calm down. Mostly because I threw all of my frustrations and feelings of hurt into surviving. And that was when I realized.
This is how we've lived.
Had it not been for her doing what she did, then where would we be…?
Nowhere, was what I concluded.
Hell, I may not have even been (re)born had it not been for her lifestyle. And it wasn't as if she or the others were abusive or malicious or forcing me into following in their footsteps. If anything, they were just like any other family (albeit one with less than glamorous work): warm, loving, slightly dysfunctional…
Thus, I returned.
Lifting my eyes to look at her seriously, I answered, "I don't hate you."
She looked skeptical.
"I don't hate Iisaka-nee either. Or Tomoka-nee. Or Chacha-nee. Or Okaa-sama. Or any of the others," I continued and squeezed her hands in reassurance, "I don't like the way all of ya have to do this to make money but…I think I can understand why."
Her eyes shined and I smiled, reaching out to brush away a stray tear, before she wrapped her arms around me and pulled me close.
"Thank you, Ki-chan," she whispered into my hair, "Thank you for not hating me… Thank you for being my daughter, my child, my light…"
A familiar burning sensation filled my nose but I stubbornly refused to cry as I returned her embrace and whispered,
"Thank you for giving birth to me, Mama."
03: Western Sea Demon
"…ugh…"
Abruptly pressing a palm against my lips to muffle that groan, I tried to ignore the rocking movement as I cursed yet another trait of mine that had carried over from Before.
Thy name is motion sickness…
…and it was the bane of my existence.
My stomach churned uncomfortably as the back of my throat tasted a bit bitter.
Damnable boat, I thought irritably after swallowing the urge to vomit, And why the hell did my target have to belong to a fucking pirate?!
The "fucking pirate" referred to Motochika Chosokabe, Lord of Shikoku, who commanded a rather advanced ship known as Fugaku, which also doubled as a tank and was essentially a self-moving killing machine.
…I want to go home…
But I couldn't, not when I needed to get that anchor spear of his.
…woe is me…
Resting my head against the soaked wall, I couldn't help but groan aloud and the sound was drowned out by the roaring waves.
I just had to choose the one time Poseidon's pissed off, didn't I…?
Not that I really believed in the Greek god of the sea and earthquakes but I guess that anything was possible now…
Daydreams aside, I briefly wondered if my face held a tinge of green to it as I squinted to look through the pelting rain at my objective.
Thunder cracked loudly as lightening flashed across the dark sky, briefly lighting up the waterlogged Fugaku but thankfully darkening the area where I hid.
"Alright, you bastards!" the purple-clad warlord shouted over the howling storm, "Hard to port!"
A surprisingly loud though indistinct cheer answered him and I braced myself against the wall, using chakra to enforce my grip, as the ship rocked even more before–
Holy sh–!
–the waves threw us up and there was a loud bang from the back before we sailed through the air, forcing me to cling even tighter to my support as I couldn't help but think,
They so stole that from One Piece.
Never mind the fact that no one in this dimension knew what that was.
About 50 meters away from shore, Fugaku landed heavily enough to send water flying up into the air and crashing down onto the deck.
I was displeased to find myself smelling and tasting salt.
But, being the good girl I was, I didn't bother voicing my complaints and instead contented myself with imagining a bolt of lightening striking the ship and miraculously missing me at the same time and knocking everyone out so that I could retrieve the anchor spear and leave without any trouble at all.
It was a childish thought, perhaps, but also oddly satisfying.
And then Fugaku went over something.
Feeling my body practically vibrate from the rough motion, I snapped out of my juvenile ideas and gawked upon seeing the ship transform into its tank form and drive across the sand without a problem before shaking my head in disbelief.
This is definitely not the Sengoku era from World History class…
Because, seriously, technology wasn't this advanced Before from the middle-15th to early-17th centuries.
So why do I still compare the two…?
The evidence constantly proved that this world was different from the world of my other (I still hesitate to call) life.
Why do I still use those false grounds…?
And sometimes I would wonder…
…why am I here when I so clearly do not belong?
But those were dangerous thoughts that should be treaded on lightly unless I wanted to drown myself in depression and self-pity.
Focus, Kira.
Now that we were on land and traveling relatively smoothly, I felt my nausea ease up and took the time to eye the polearm that rested against its owner's shoulder before rubbing my forehead in frustration.
So that's how it's gonna be, huh…
Chosokabe wasn't about to give up his weapon and I really shouldn't expect anything less.
(Subconsciously, I patted the tanto that rested against my lower back and near my right hip.)
…better get ready started then.
Resisting the urge to sigh, I watched as the captain ordered his men to either clean up the place, take note of what supplies needed to be bought or change directions along with several commands that I couldn't quite make out over the rabble.
Footsteps were approaching in my direction and I quietly slipped into a dark corner of the area, cloaking my presence instinctively.
O' chakra, how I love thee…
A seaman ambled by, twisting the water out of his bandanna and whistling a jaunty tune.
Hm… Should I…?
It wouldn't be too difficult to copy his appearance with a simple Henge but…
I suck at acting.
Wrinkling my nose in thought, I debated for a moment before finally shaking my head and tossing the idea out of mind.
I'll figure out another way…
But that still begged the question:
What other way is there…?
It was a little depressing to know that I wasn't a very creative person when it came to tactics and I was highly tempted to grow mushrooms in my little corner when–
"Listen up, you sons of bitches!"
–Chosokabe easily captured everyone's attention with a single shout as the ship-turned-tank suddenly stopped in its track.
With one foot resting against the bow, he grinned rather cheekily and raised a fist, shouting,
"Break out the mugs! We're gonna have a hell of a time tonight!"
"ANIKI!" came the uproarious chorus.
…ow…
Ignoring the way that the crew bustled about in a variety of actions, I rubbed furiously at my ears in an attempt to stop the ringing.
…someone save me from these brutes…
After what felt like ages, I finally got my sense of hearing to work properly and slunk out of the shadows in order to conserve my dwindling energy.
Now let's see…
Glancing about from my hiding spot, I was confused to see that most of them were drunker than drunk with quite a few already passed out on the deck.
That was fast…?
But then I glanced up at the sky and realized that more time had passed than I'd initially thought if the fading moon was any indication.
Oy vey, I really need to stop zoning out…
Pinching myself, I flinched as the pain snapped me to attention before sneaking a peek around the ship again and deadpanning at the sight.
How the hell is he still sober?
There was a multitude of kegs surrounding him and he was still drinking away.
Should I be jealous of his tolerance level…?
I couldn't decide so I pushed that random thought to the back of my mind and focused on how to acquire his anchor spear.
…Well, if it ain't broke, then don't fix it, I recalled that quote as I rummaged through my satchel and pulled out a container with "羊" engraved in the cap, In this case, if the plan has yet to fail, then just stick with it.
Popping open the small case, I tapped it against my palm until a small blue pill fell out–it was a consumable version of the Sheep–and closed the container, slipping it back into my bag.
I looked around in hopes of finding somewhere to drop it in before my eyes lit up upon landing on the man staggering towards my direction.
Sinking into the shadows, I waited as he passed me to enter the storage room and waited until he passed me again.
Too much would be disastrous so…
Like a ninja, I crushed and dropped a quarter of the sedative into the keg of beer that he was carrying and slipped back into the darkness.
…plus alcohol and…voila.
Mere moments later, everyone was utterly wasted.
And, had it not been for their moving chests, they would've appeared dead…
I shook that eerie observation off and carefully monitored the purple lord's chakra as I tiptoed over to him.
All was calm.
Perhaps Lady Luck is on my side, I thought with a wry smile as I sealed the anchor spear away before frowning a bit, Best not to get complacent though.
That would be a one-way ticket to failure.
I doubt this plan will work a third time so…to the drawing board then.
Casting one last glance at the snoring crew, I slipped off of Fugaku and began making my way eastward.
Twenty-three days remain.
GN: Once again, I thank everyone who's still reading this and I hope that you're all enjoying it. :) There's not much to say aside from the fact that I should be working my my papers instead of this but... Oh well. *shrugs*
Disclaimer: Sengoku Basara © Capcom; Naruto © Masashi Kishimoto; Kira and all other original concepts © me