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Paths of the Heart

A Golden Peach

The sun turned the soft red and orange hues of the peach into a veritable feast to the eyes, deepening and intensifying them. To Elia's eye, the first rows of trees in the orchard grove looked like an explosion of ten radiant suns of fire and gold. She felt like spurring her mare this way and raise her hand to catch one of the fruits, feel its ripe skin split and the sweet juice stain her fingers, sticky and wondrous. Without looking back, she knew that Edric was itching to do the same thing. In fact, she was almost sure she could hear his voice begging his father to take him there, and she wondered if Robert regretted taking the child before him in the saddle, or he would actually cave and ride forth to steal from the orchard. A King and a thief all in one. She smiled to herself and then scowled when they actually rode straight for the peaches. Her scowl deepened when, at returning, Robert avoided looking at her. He knew that he had disgruntled her but of course, he had been unable to stop himself. Sometimes, Elia felt like she had three children to discipline! Robert did no worse job with reining his impulses in than Edric but that was not exactly a great compliment.

"Are you angry with us?" he asked, still not quite looking at her. The juice gleamed on his fingers, as alive and sticky as Elia had imagined it.

"No," she replied coolly and truthfully. She was not angry with them. With him, though…

"We brought you a peach, Mama!" Edric chimed in and somehow, taking the fruit from his hand, Elia could not even stay properly angry with Robert.

"Take him to the wheelhouse," she said, recognizing that her son was about to fall asleep right there, atop the horse.

She did not expect for Robert to return and was, in fact, engrossed in a conversation with Magdeen Dalt when he came back. Magdeen steered her horse aside.

"Elia," he said. "You can't be really angry, can you? These are things that are common for a royal progress. In fact, it's a cause for surprise if any lands near the road remain unplundered. We have more than five thousand people to feed."

"This doesn't make it fine," she replied levelly. "In fact, it only says something about our abilities. That they're quite limited! There are ways to feed our retainers without robbing the people who have been tending all this blind. Have you ever thought of arranging temporary markets in certain points along the road? I can't believe your brother had not thought of this."

At least he had the decency to look ashamed. "He might have mentioned something. In fact, I think he did, in a letter, but it was so boring, as usual, that I didn't quite pay attention."

Now, she became truly angry. Didn't quite pay attention? Didn't quite pay attention? She kept her silence because antagonizing him would achieve nothing right now but she truly and selfishly wished that Jon Arryn were here. The man was probably relieved to be doing his duties capably and in peace in King's Landing, without having to mind and entertain Robert. A little vicious part of her whispered that the Lord of the Vale simply got his just desserts for bringing Robert up the way he had. But then, reality settled in. While Jon Arryn could have undoubtedly done a better job, he had not planted the seeds. They had been there, just like her frailness had been instilled in her from the day of her birth a month too early. And if Robert accepted her as she was, well, she owed him the courtesy to do the same, did she not? At least he had never dragged her to a tourney to show her off and then humiliate her in front of the entire realm.

Rhaegar again! Would she never be free of him? He had only been in her life for three years, half of the first two to from Summerhall or hidden in his library and the third one with his Northerner who fancied herself a woman. She had done her best to forget about him and yet he refused to stay with the Stranger where he belonged. Perhaps it was her desire to have sent him back there personally that brought him back! Even in the beauty of the summer day, in a landscape not so different from her own, her hatred of him rose as high as ever. Sometimes, she managed to forget about him but forgive him about becoming the reason for having their children taken from her, depriving their son from his throne through his stupidity – never!

She would never be free of the poison of the past.

"I will show you how it is done before the next progress," she said, wondering with a sickening feeling how much of her desire to turn him into a better man, a better king was pure striving to make Rhaegar sink into further oblivion, further unfavourable comparisons. For him, the songs bards made about the brave warrior King who had fought against injustice and saved the beautiful and wronged Princess to make her his cherished Queen might have been punishment enough – but not to Elia. Never her. No matter how well Robert treated her. No matter how beloved she was by smallfolk and court alike – which was, of course, a reflection of her King's own attitude to her. Not as long as her heart remained torn between the children from her two marriages and the bitter realization that Edric could never bloom without Aegon being squashed into anonymity.

The moment she set eyes on her goodsister, Elia knew that Cersei had not forgotten or forgiven anything. Behind this serene, welcoming smile, there was hatred that could not be mistaken. Of course, Elia did not think there was anything to forgive. It was not her father who had tried to kill Cersei repeatedly. It was not her who had dealt Cersei's best friend an unforgivable offence – that was, if Cersei even had a best friend at all. Elia thought her too self-absorbed for this.

She did not miss the way the younger woman's eyes kept turning to Robert as they walked through the gates, and the amount of her vexation was surprising to her. Cersei was practically ripping the clothes off him! And they call us Dornish lewd. Elia's mother would have smiled and waved it off, declaring that she could not blame Cersei for having the good taste to be fascinated with Arianne's own husband; Elia though, just half the woman that her mother had been, toyed with the idea of offering her goodsister a handkerchief to wipe her saliva with. But then, she would look as irate as disgruntled as she was. Worse, Robert would find it amusing and his brother would not appreciate the humour or understand that it was at Elia's expense and not his own.

Still, even with her being all dignified, Lady Baratheon's behavior was blatant enough to make both her husband and brother glare at her. Elia gave a mental shrug. As far as Robert was not taking part – like, staring at Cersei openly which he would have done if she and Lord Stannis had been absent, - it was no concern of hers. Instead, she stared at the massive building and marveled at just how much it fit Robert – impressive, noticeable from afar, a force to be reckoned with – and still it did not fit him at all. Not ostentatious enough. Not comfortable for ships. She stole a look at Cersei and realized why the other woman's bitterness had grown even more. As rich as the castle was, it was no background to make her shine. And it was no background for Robert either. Not enough people to see and love him. But the Eyrie was said to be even more isolated, yet Robert had loved it there. Elia wished that she could see the Eyrie, understand what drew him so. She almost turned back to tell him so but kept her manners and instead, made a nice comment about the castle to Lord Stannis who did not quite huff but did not reply in kind. She could not help but notice how plain he looked now, with Robert near. Her husband had this way to dwarf everyone in his vicinity, his brother included. Still, at least Cersei could have acted more like a woman grown and not a tavern wench falling for the first pair of nice broad shoulders coming around! Did I look like this when Rhaegar passed me by to crown Lyanna Stark, Elia wondered. Humiliation was never a pretty sight.

She smiled when she saw the heir of Storm's End. Although with his father's colouring, young Steffon had taken his mother's finely chiseled features and all the charm Robert must have possessed at his age. Within minutes, he and Edric were already fast friends which delighted her – especially when she saw that it did not delight Steffon's mother at all. Smiling, she refused Cersei's offer to have Edric shown to his chamber – he was not this tired. Then, she kept herself occupied with the polite conversation flowing around, all the while paying notice of how people reacted to Robert. It was as if the sun had come. Tears in the eyes. Beaming faces. This did not surprise her at all. Her lord husband had this way of making everyone feel important, although Elia knew for a fact that he had not given any of them much of a thought in years. But then, why not? When he rose and looked at her, suggesting with a slight wink that they retired, even she smiled back before she could give the suggestion a conscious thought, although she knew that he had spent last night with the daughter, or was she niece, to the lord in whose castle they had stayed.

"I like it here," she said after a while, snuggled against him in the oak bed that was big enough for them to lie without touching after sex. "It's so… elemental."

His laughter boomed in the quiet bedchamber, overcoming the soft sound of crashing waves coming through the windows. "Elemental, eh?" he said. "Like me, you mean?"

Elia smiled without answering. "I am not insulted," he said good-naturedly. "I am elemental and you, of all people, should know this. So, do you think we would have been happy here?"

"No," she answered promptly and he whistled.

"You don't say! I had no idea how well off I was with this quiet mouse of a wife who did her best not to vex me."

Now, she laughed. "No, really," she insisted. "Do you think your lord father would have ever considered me for you? I was too old and unhealthy. He would have settled for someone young and hale."

"It didn't work out so well when I tried this, did it?" There was still a touch of bitterness in his voice. And then, he touched her cheek with uncharacteristic clumsiness. "Although I'm afraid it worked far worse for you than it did for me. I, for one, am completely pleased with the situation."

Right now, so was Elia. Right now. She stayed silent, snuggled in his arms, at peace with herself and the world. Outside, the sea sang softly, powerfully, and soothingly.