Chapter 4

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The days dragged on, bleak and long, without a purpose as she herself wasted her life slumped over a table- wondering if perhaps she really was fit to be a Jedi.

Jedi were courageous and strong and...and she just wasn't. Jedi weren't weak and they didn't cry over things like the ones she was moping about. But then...why wasn't she leaving? Why was she staying in the very same room that she used to share with her Master?

Why didn't she take the chance to leave and escape these dreaded memories that haunted her day and night?

And she didn't even want to admit it herself but she was scared. She feared with all her heart and her being that her uselessness would at one point annoy the Jedi Council and force them to decide that she could not partake in her duty as Jedi anymore.

It had always been a dream of her to grow as a strong Jedi and earn her place among other Knights. But that dream had been shattered cruelly when she had seen her Master's lifeblood spill and drain.

Because for now...all she could do right now was mope. If the time came and Force knew it would- she would not be able to defend herself because in her grief, her body had grown weak.

She resembled a walking skeleton.

And she would have already starved if it wasn't for Master Kenobi and her friend, Katooni. Katooni was always here. Always hoping that she would snap out of it. But no such luck.

She picked up a stray paper under the couch she was sitting on, numbly going over it with a rare show of quick interest.

'The Order has told me that there was a rival in town. I was to distract them so that the shipments could be gathered and taken to Tatooine were I will be overlooking them. Hopefully I can see my family.'

Her eyes widened as she took in her Master's quick elegant writing into a more serious observation. The bit of flimsi paper was white, new in other words, so it must have been one of the last notes he had written that weren't her training instructions.

Maybe this was some clue as to who killed him! Maybe she could figure it out and bring that individual to justice. It had been clear that whoever had killed Anakin was not that person whom she had killed. This was the work of some thing or someone darker.

But then as she went over it a third time, she deflated. It clearly spoke about the Council telling her Master about overlooking some drug lord's movements or something. There was nothing there.

Yet there was something prickling in the back of her mind. The two words, 'The Order.' They were written with great care, her Master even going as far was italicizing it, and the two front letters were capital.

Was it truly the Jedi Council that her Master was speaking of- or was this the ever illusive name of something more sinister? Was it a whole organization that had been going after Anakin?

She went back on previous conversations and she remembered that never- in any occasion had her Master ever referred to the Council as The Order. It was always something along the line as 'the Masters,''the Council' or 'those old coots.'

But never 'The Order.'

The knowledge instantly rebooted her mind and brought to mind more questions and realizations. Without her noticing, she had begun to heal in a way that she would always be able to bring forwards that pain. For now it was enough. She had a purpose now and it would be enough to push her and motivate her towards something productive.

She sprung to her feet, stopped only by the slight dizziness the overtook her only to assume a stance that would impede any meetings with the floor. Immediately grabbing a quick glass of water and a ration bar she set out on a hunt to search for any more papers.

There were dozens of boxes and even more dozens of locations were any such papers could be found. For an average searcher, it would have taken a long period. But Ahsoka knew her Master and his hidey holes.

It only took her a precise amount of about half an hour to find everything she could without collapsing. As soon as she had a commendable amount of "evidence" in her grasp did she sit down and start thinking.

"First, I think we should start with any recent leads. From there we can go back. No! First I need to go over all this secretly. I have to sort this and only then can I see where to go."

Grabbing another ration bar and a bottle of sweetened water, she set out at her task. She dragged everything she found to her Master's room. It was filled with robotic parts and tools- things she immediately rounded up and threw in a box randomly, shoving the boxes to the main room. She continued like this, ripping colorful posters off the wall and dumping unused clothes into the drawers, until only the two desks remained and the bed was shoved to the corner where it would prove less a distraction.

As she sat back to admire her handiwork, she perked up again as inspiration struck. Quickly running to her room, she grabbed the five whiteboards and three bulletin boards she had hung around her room. She propped them onto the wall and then went back to her room for the holographic projector she had in it to add it to her Master's own.

The room now had the proper resources she needed to conduct a proper examination of the possible clues she had within her grasp. Her first question: wanting to know the reason why her Master had used bound flimsi paper to collect his thoughts and not a datapad.

Had his thoughts been dangerous as so to prompt caution and a totally uncivilized way to record them?

Before she could actually submerge herself in information, she heard a faint knock. Her blood ran cold as she remembered that she had forgotten to make sure she was not to be interrupted.

Her rash actions had not made time for serious thinking and she was about to pay for that. Unless...

"Ahsoka! Are you okay? May I enter?" It was Katooni.

Bounding to the main room while pushing against the boxes was a struggle to her, but she finally managed to unlock the door's pass codes. As the door slid open, she caught a glimpse of Katooni's surprised face before Ahsoka swung to her.

"Katooni?"

Katooni shook her head, "Ah yes! Uh- how have you been Ahsoka? Have you gotten better? Although I really shouldn't be asking- much. You still look like you need to sleep and eat."

Ahsoka sighed then smiled tiredly, "Hmm. I will don't worry. I am not catatonic anymore."

Katooni seemed to brighten as she was already smiling ridiculously, "Really!? What prompted your ah- recovery?"

The Togruta made a vague mention by waving her hand to the main room, "The mess. It's...overwhelming...the memories. But I finally thought that I need to snap out of it. My Master would not have been...happy."

Ahsoka wasn't liking the heavy feeling of guilt that overtook her over her actions towards Katooni. Not only was she deceiving her friend, but she was blatantly lying to her. But she couldn't tell Katooni about the bunch of evidence in the room behind her. This was something she had to do by herself.

"Wow!" Katooni gasped, "Usually it takes someone else to say that to you. Ah- what I mean is that- well..."

"I know. Nobody would come to this conclusion on themselves."

"Well yes but-"

"Don't worry, Katooni." Ahsoka smiled, "I fear I have not been civil to you, even when you have tried to help me. And I have to thank you for your patience. I apologize. You are truly more a commendable Jedi than I am right now."

Katooni looked like a deer in headlights, utterly shocked by Ahsoka's words, "Ahsoka..."

Ahsoka smiled, carefully hiding her intentions behind that warm action. Katooni surged forward, engulfing her friend in a hug. "I'm glad you're back. I truly, truly missed you. I missed you so much!"

The lump in her throat had gotten thicker and she found that she couldn't reply no matter what. So she only hugged her friend tighter- the simple movement being more significant than every word she had uttered within the last two minutes.

'I am so sorry, Katooni.' A frown behind Katooni, 'I hope you can forgive me.'

When she did return to her newly declared workspace with a heavy heart, the only thing she managed to think about was the bit were her Master had mentioned Tatooine.

He had gone there. Somehow he had had time to go there without her noticing. Maybe it had been when she had been taking those lessons under Madame Nu.

Ahsoka sighed as she leaned back on her chair. Tatooine was the most recent place her Master had been that most likely held clues, answers, and most likely; more questions. Perhaps in the end it would end up being a waste of time but she had to make sure, she could not overlook any single clue, not of it meant that her Master would get avenged.

But how could she could arrange a trip to Tatooine without anyone noticing? As she was right now, she was considered unstable. To regain complete trust of the Council would take months of recuperation and therapy. Time she didn't have nor could spare.

Could she disguise her intentions under something else perhaps? But what? She groaned in disgust at the huge amount of complications she was facing. This was unprecedented- this investigation needed someone who had clearance and authority, someone who had resources.

This someone wasn't her.

Then it clicked. She scrambled for her com-link and brought it close to her mouth.

"Master Obi-Wan?"

I thank everyone who has read this story. But I also profusely thank those who have taken the time to review, it has been invigorating to see your helpful reviews. I apologize for the long wait. Hopefully this winter break is enough to get a few chapters done and submitted. Thanks again!

Water Creation