Charlie was alive, but was it better to have the Charlie who loved him, dead, or have the Charlie who hated him in front of him, spewing resentment and disgust with his every look?
Unable to comprehend what had just passed, O'Neill left the house and started walking, just walking anywhere, as long as it was away from the angry, resentful eyes of his son. They bore into his heart. He walked faster, trying to get farther away from the source of his pain, but with every step he took, the heavier his heart felt, the hotter the flame of anguish burned in his soul.
"Should we follow him?" Sam asked worriedly.
"No, leave him alone." Daniel said assuredly. He could only imagine what Jack was going through at this moment. He knew how messed up he was after Charlie's death. Now it seemed all that misery was for nothing. Boy, had Lo-key a lot to answer for. If Jack ever got his hands on that mischievious, meddling...
Several hours had passed, and it was now dark. Carter had made contact with Hammond to update him on the events of the day. Needless to say, the General was flabbergasted, and genuinely concerned for the state of his 2IC. Despite the Colonel's irreverence and sometimes unorthodox methods, he had developed a deep respect for the man, not only militarily, but as a human being. The Colonel was an exceptional person; one who would sacrifice everything for country, world, and, most especially, friend.
"Where is my dad?" Charlie looked up at Teal'c, a worried expression momentarily surfacing on his young features.
"I do not know, Charlie O'Neill, but I am sure he will return." Teal'c had only heard rumors of O'Neill's lost son, and now, to meet him face to face was something he and his teammates had never imagined. The Colonel as a father. They were sure his personlity and demeanor had developed the way they had due largely to the birth and then the tragic loss of his son, as well as the loss of his wife. The Colonel was, some thought, a callous, unfeeling man. But, in reality, he had a sensitive soul driven through a gauntlet of pain and suffering that no one should have to go through. That gauntlet had left his soul scarred, and yes, calloused, but he could never completely deny his true nature. He loved his team, as well as his wife (as evidenced by his concern for her during the events with the crystal entity.) Every now and then a twinkle of his former self resurfaced in carefree moments of levity with his team. Daneil wondered if he would ever see that again, after this, Jack's latest brush with suffering. o much could his spirit handle before it morphed into somehting different entirely?
Acceptance. He had to accept that Charlie was who he was now, and not how he remembered him. NOt only that, but he had to deal with the unpleasant memories shoved back into the abysmal sector of his mind. Charlie had been angry with him when he died. He had never been able to reconcile before the end. That was what had made the whole event, not only hard, but impossible to deal with. He could not go over the events in his head, accepting what had happened, because what had happened had been unacceptable. Charlie had not forgiven him, how could he? He had tried to forget as much as possible. Eventually good memories were the only ones he allowed himself access to, but even those sometimes brought him back to the last conversation with his son. The one he had dreampt of last night. But Charlie was no longer a dream, a tried-to-forget memory. He was back there...waiting for his father? No, he hated him, let him believe he was dead! Gradually anger and determination surged through his being. Damn it! I'm his father! I will go back to him whether he wants it or not. He, nor I have a choice in the matter. With that he picked himself up and headed back to the house.
As he approached the abode, a strange light seemed to appear in the sky above the building. Aasgard! He would recognize that light anywhere! He ran to the house, only to see his son enveloped in the light. He scrambled and tried to grab onto Charlie, but he was transported beyond reach. Jack had fallen on the ground in his desperate attempt. He didn't bother to get up, but stared helplessly at the ceiling. He had lost Charlie again.