"You look a lot better."
The man in the bed grinned. Liar.
"Trust me, you do. Way better than the last time I saw you." Tugging out a chair Kira sat by his friend, managing an apologetic smile. "Sorry I've been so long in visiting."
Mwu-san waved a bandaged hand. Don't worry about it. Been busy?
"Kinda, yeah. Everyone's talking about what happens when we get to Orb, where we'll go, what we'll do... " He shrugged. "No-one's really sure, but Cagalli says she'll help as many people as she can."
What about you?
"Don't know. Lacus says she wants to go live on Earth, so I guess I could go with her, or go back to Mom and Dad. Even if.." Kira frowned and looked away.
Nah, they're your mom and dad, kid. You know that.
He smiled a little. "Yeah. What about you? Hospital?"
His friend pulled a face and nodded, making Kira laugh. "It won't be that bad, surely?"
No, I guess not. Just boring.
"It won't be for too long, though. And then.."
A smile. Yeah. He looked down at his lap, then peeked sideways at Kira. Never got to thank you, did I?
"For what?"
Finding me. She tells me you and the others were the ones who found me and brought me back. She offered to say it for me, but I wanted to wait and say it myself.
"You don't need.."
Course I do. You guys saved my life. He rubbed at the bandages over his nose almost shyly. And it meant that she.. Well, you know. Thank you for that, too.
Kira nodded, understanding. It meant that Murrue-san wasn't left alone. She herself had thanked them, coming to find them after she'd first visited Mwu-san. She'd tried to be formal, to say it as a captain would, but the emotions had gotten the better of her and she'd broken down in tears, only able to whisper her gratitude as she'd hugged each one of them.
"That you're here and getting well is all the thanks I need. I'm sure they'd say the same. Besides, if it hadn't been for both of you I wouldn't have made it past the end of the first week, let alone the end of the war. So we'll call it quits."
But.. Mwu-san sighed. All right, I guess. But she'll still try to find a way to pay you back.
"Probably. Is she doing all right? Lacus says she's treating you herself."
A fond smile. She is, and she's doing fine. The Director lady's looking after her for me - going to give her a place to stay and something to do. I need to thank her too when I get chance.
Kira grinned. "And when you get your voice back."
An audible 'huff'. Tell me about it. It's driving me nuts. And there's no sympathy from her either - she just makes fun of me.
"Maybe she appreciates the peace and quiet."
Mwu-san just snorted.
The kid didn't look right. He smiled and talked and said the right things, but he knew him well enough by now to be able to see that something was wrong. The eyes, he decided. The smile doesn't quite get there. Probably he shouldn't ask, but in his experience bottling things up only led to more trouble later on.
What is it?
Kira blinked. "Eh?"
There's something bothering you.
"I.." That half-smile again. "Just tired."
Mwu rolled his eyes. Who are you trying to kid here? Me or yourself?
And Kira told him. About the Allster girl, about how she'd been out there in one of Dominion's lifeboats - about how Klueze had killed her. The kid did cry, just a little, and Mwu managed to pat his arm awkwardly.
You get him?
Another small smile, tears dashed away with the back of a hand. "No," he admitted ruefully. "He was caught up in that last blast from Jachin Due. I think he planned for it to happen that way."
Probably. That Klueze was dead he'd known almost from the moment he'd woken up. It had been - still was - a strange feeling, one that he didn't quite have a name for yet.
"Are you okay?"
Mwu smiled. Yeah. Just thinking.
"Can you tell?"
He nodded. Could tell right away.
"Are you sorry?"
In a way. He never had much of a life. But I wouldn't wish him back or anything. Leaning back against the pillows he blew upwards at his hair before peeking back at the kid. You won't blame yourself, will you? About that girl?
The kid's smile was kind of lopsided. "I'll try not to."
No. You have to promise that you won't. Sitting up as best he could Mwu aimed a glare at his friend. That sort of thing...it eats you up from inside. Took me twenty years and a good talking to to make me stop, and there are still times when I forget. I don't want anyone else to go through that. You hear me? What happened to her wasn't your fault. He coughed sharply, waving away Kira's concern. Right?
"Right. I promise. Just please...lie back down before Murrue-san or the nurses catch you."
"You said all that? No wonder Kira-kun's been so quiet."
Mwu grinned somewhat sheepishly. Didn't mean to be so forceful about it. He okay?
"Seems to be. Are you?"
Nurses said I exerted myself too much. A huff. Threatened to sedate me if I didn't behave. As though I don't sleep enough as it is.
Murrue smiled and smoothed down his hair. "They're just doing their job. And the more you push yourself, the longer it might take to recover."
S'not like I tried to run a marathon or anything. Just coughed a bit. At her expression he sighed. And that's not the point. I know. Sorry.
She squeezed his hand gently. "For me, okay? It won't be for too long."
The smile returned, and he brought her hand close to kiss it. Makes it harder to be patient when you know what's waiting, though.
"Yes, I know."
Another smile and he let go of her hand, settling back to let her work on his injuries. He seemed to have something on his mind though, blue eyes faraway, and she didn't think it'd be too long before he spoke up again.
And she was right.
You don't blame yourself anymore either, do you?
"After what you said to Kira-kun, I daren't."
Not what I meant.
"I know it wasn't. And really, I'm trying not to. But it's not easy." She still saw and heard it all in nightmares. The light from Dominion, the scream of alarms, the way Strike had... She shook her head, turning away so he wouldn't see her face.
Hey, A rustle of fabric, and a warm arm around her waist. I'm sorry.
Despite her tears (which she quickly scrubbed away) Murrue smiled. "What did I just tell you?"
I'm ignoring you. C'mere. And he hugged her, cheek resting against her shoulder. There's nothing to blame yourself for. It was my decision.
She swallowed hard. But if I'd only been better, she wanted to say, but knew he wouldn't agree or even accept that. "I know."
You told me back at Mendel that none of what had happened before was my fault, and you expected me to listen, didn't you? At her nod, he chuckled softly. How is this any different?
And she couldn't answer that.
Here. Catching her arm he spun her around as best he could. You said you were proud of me back then. Do you have any idea at all how proud I am of you?
And she cried. She couldn't help it. Mwu sighed and pulled her close. C'mon now, no more crying. It's going to be okay.
And for almost the first time, she thought that it really would be.