Chaos of the Heart: Chapter 4: The Plan
Pushing through the throng of women clustered around the door the ODS team's office, oblivious to their murmurs of awe and adulation and to the occasional thud, Rick, dressed in an undershirt, blue jeans, cowboy boots and leather jacket, stumbles into the meeting coffee cup in hand. Yes, there were thuds. Women drop like flies when operative Rick, universally acknowledged as the most handsome, desirable, and brightest star in the agency's sky, brushes by. Rick heads straight for the conference table and plops into the nearest empty chair, rubbing his weary eyes. Fay and the ODS team, already seated around the large round table, cease talking and turn to study Rick keenly.
Then Michael launches into an impassioned rant about Higgins crossing the line when he got Adele to seduce Rick and pump him for information about the ODS team's operations. It's unacceptable! Outrageous! This kind of thing must be stopped once and for all! Then Michael lowers his voice and says he is about to reveal the next step of his plan. Everyone hushes and leans forward, intent on Michael's words. Because it is a given, explains Michael, that Rick harbors deep and passionate hate and resentment towards Adele, and also that she now shuns the attentions of all men, the next phase will be particularly difficult, and will require extraordinary skill to accomplish.
Rick sets down his coffee cup and glances around the hushed group expectantly.
Michael announces the next phase of the plan: Rick is to seduce Adele.
Gasping loudly, Rick jerks upright, eyes wide with astonishment. Oh, happy day! Rick quickly drops his gaze, rubs his chin slowly and contemplatively, appearing lost in intense, melancholy thought, hiding his jubilation. His heart sings and his pulse races! Michael will permit him to look upon Adele's beautiful face, speak into her exquisite ears, gaze into her lively blue eyes, kiss her pouty red lips, stroke the golden hair which floats like a shimmering halo around her face and neck. Hallelujah! With Michael's approbation, he may again be her lover. But only if she'll have him! His ecstasy is short lived, soon replaced by the pain and agony of self doubt. She won't have him because she hates him. She hates him for dumping her, and even more for how he did it.
Rick looks up, shakes his head somberly, and admits he doesn't know if he could ever win back her love. Especially, it pains him to admit, since he never had it in the first place. He stands up, peels off his leather jacket, and flings it down onto his desk in despair and frustration. Dejected, he sits, hands clasped behind his head, elbows to the ceiling, and leans back, his mind alive with wondrous visions of the lovely, but unattainable, Adele.
Fay's eyes are irresistibly drawn to Rick's scantily clad abs and bulging biceps. She fans her face and says to no one in particular, "Is it hot in here?" Ever since Rick broke up with Adele, she, like every other woman in the agency, wishes to be his next girlfriend. She almost had him once. She rues the day she let him slip through her fingers! She flutters her eyelashes at him but Rick fails to notice.
"I know it won't happen overnight," says Michael. "We have to have reasonable expectations." He allows that Adele will be a tough nut to crack. It will be a challenge for Rick to pierce her hardened armor with cupid's arrow, especially given their history. Especially since he will find it so terribly repugnant to woo and to make love to a woman he hates. "But if you can act in love with her convincingly enough to win her heart, you will regain your confidence," Michael assures Rick. "You will know you can do anything," he says. "Rick, I'm asking you to go under cover. Deep undercover, if you catch my drift." Rick has a dreamy look on his face. By now, Michael is used to Rick losing his concentration. "Do you catch my drift?" Michaels repeats a little louder. "I do," replies Rick. "And I could do that, " he tells Michael gravely. "If I can get that far. But how can I," he laments sadly, "when she hates me?"
"I have a plan." Michael then describes a complicated multistep plan, requiring the team to plant a trick running shoe at Adele's home, then for Rick to appear to meet Adele accidentally while jogging, then for the trick shoe to deploy suddenly, causing Adele to fall and injure her ankle, and for Rick to perform a romantic rescue, carrying her to the hospital. "A bullet proof plan," claims Michael, "a sure-fire way to win any woman's heart."
Fay demurs. She objects to causing injury to Adele. Pain and romance do not mix, she says. She waves her hand dismissively at Michael, and disparages his notion of a romantic gesture. "This sort of idiocy," she says, "is why I left him."
Billy interrupts Fay's harangue to suggest another plan. He outlines another complicated multistep plan, requiring Rick to learn to play the guitar, to learn to sing romantic songs, to memorize romantic poems, and then to sing and recite these to Adele. It will take forever, object all the others, and not only that, everyone agrees, it wouldn't work because Rick has no musical talent, whatsoever. Rick wishes he could crawl under the table.
Casey speaks next. He boasts that he is the expert in this subject and reminds them of his success with Doris. They laugh. He stares them down dourly and continues, asserting confidently that he can win over any woman, but that he couldn't teach a dolt like Rick all his secrets even if he were willing to reveal them. He suggests wiring Rick up before he goes to see Adele, so that Casey can talk him through the seduction. He will tell Rick step-by-step what he is to do and what he is to say. "Brilliant," exclaims Billy with excitement, "a modern take on the Cyrano de Bergerac method!"
Fay demurs again. Her eyes fixed on Rick, she stands up, plants her hands on the conference table, and leans towards him, smiling indulgently. Lost in his own problems, Rick ignores Fay. Drat, she thinks, all her flirting with Rick is not getting her anywhere!
Fay explains that she thinks their plans are far more complicated than necessary. She has observed Adele closely and thinks that despite appearances the rumors are working and she is secretly in love with Rick, fighting her fierce attraction to him with every tenacious fiber of her strong spirit. "She's close to the breaking point," says Fay. To everyone's shock and surprise, she suggests that Rick simply march into Adele's office and ask her out on a date.
Rick instantly jumps up, grabs Fay by the shoulders and stands close to her, face to face, demanding to know if she is serious. He demands to know if Adele might accept a date with him. "Probably," squeaks Fay. "It is worth a try," she adds.
Too impulsive to wait and listen to the rest of Michael's plan, Rick grabs his leather jacket, dives through the thudding throng of women at the doorway, and dashes to Adele's office.