Merea leaned out of the window, her blond hair flying around in the wind. "This is fun!" she cried, drowning out Lia and Keefe's argument about whether the car should stay banana-shaped or not.
"Bananas are cool!" Keefe protested. "They're, like, in."
He received a lot of raised eyebrows.
"I say we change the shape so that it looks somewhat normal," Lia said. "All in favor?"
Every hand went up excluding Dex's (because he was driving, though Merea doubted that removing one hand would make his driving any worse… they were now driving on three wheels, having left one behind, and in possession of five police cars on their tail) and Keefe's, who was sitting in stony silence, his hair messier than usual.
"CHANGE IT!" Biana pleaded Dex. "It's so… so… so… so…. UGLY!" She gasped and clamped her hand over her mouth, emitting a muffled squeak. "I said the u-word!"
Sophie rolled her eyes, then leaned into the front seat. "Please?" she asked Dex.
Dex faltered. "Well, I- I don't know. I kinda like bananas."
"High-five, dude!" Keefe said.
Sophie seemed annoyed that her Sophie charm wasn't working. "Pleeeeeeeeeeeeease?" she tried again.
Dex sighed. "Fine." He trailed his fingers over the dashboard, and when Merea looked at it from the window, it had become something that resembled an SUV.
"Better," said Lia.
Lia stepped into one of the round things. "Is this… a cup?" she asked in confusion.
"Yep," Sophie grinned. "Siddown." She gave Lia a shove, sending her toppling into a purple teacup with a flower. Fitz sat down in a green cup and Sophie joined him. Merea slid into the ledge across from Lia. "Hey!" she chirped, as the cups started shifting, fist spinning, then moving side-to-side.
"Are we having fun yet?" Keefe called from his hot pink teacup embellished with some hearts.
"Shut up!" Merea yelled back. She threw what seemed to be a sock that the last person had left on the ride in his face.
"Yaaah!" Keefe yelled. "Oh, wait. Hey, this tastes like mac n' cheese!"
"Gross." Lia muttered.
All of them gaped at the huge pink monstrosity while Biana brandished tickets at them.
"The tunnel… of love?" Dex said weakly.
"There's a tunnel of love at Disneyland?" Sophie said incredulously. "Only you could find that," she added to Biana.
"Thank you!" Biana beamed.
"It wasn't a compliment."
Fitz cut in. "So…. why are we going on it? Why do we need to? Why don't we just…" he took a few steps back.
Biana grabbed the collar of his shirt. "Oh, you're going," she said, shoving a pink ticket into his open mouth. "You too," she added to Sophie, handing her a ticket and pushing her into one of the heart shaped boats. Fitz received the same treatment. He straightened up and glanced at Sophie. "H-hi."
Sophie blushed and looked down. "Um, hi."
"They're acting like they've never seen each other before," Merea whispered to Lia.
"Shhhhhh! Don't interrupt their moment."
Just as their bright pink boat was about to enter the tunnel, a sign sprang up, flashing neon letters and a soundtrack. "WARNING! Must hold hands to proceed. WARNING! WARNING!"
"Oh, great…" Fitz groaned. Merea stifled a laugh.
After staying there, bumped around by the forward current and the lit-up barrier in from of them, and having their eardrums ruptured by "WARNING! WARNING!" Sophie and Fitz decided to get it over with. They grabbed each other's hands and moved down the tunnel. Biana sighed. "Soooo romantic."
Lia pretend barfed.
"So," continued Biana, "who wants to go next?"
Nobody moved.
Merea looked into the pinkish gloom, trying to ignore the plinky music thrumming through the tunnel as neither she or Arian spoke. Lia and Dex were ahead of them (having been forced into their boat by Biana amidst a considerable amount of screaming, fist-fighting and cotton candy), but she couldn't see their boat. Her mind fell silent too, only waking up for short periods of time to ejaculate random thoughts like I hate Biana or why me. She tried to pry her hand away from Arian's, but a glowing sign popped up and berated them with "WARNING!"s until she consented.
SPLASH!
"AAAAAAH!"
"WARNING!"
"Oh, my gosh, I'm so, so, so sorry!"
"WARNING!"
"You little - !"
"WAAAAAAARNIIIING!"
"AUGGGHHHHH SHUT UP!"
...
"warning."
Merea sat up straight, then looked sideways at Arian. "I think Lia just fell off of her boat."
He sniggered. "Yup."
Suddenly it didn't seem so awkward, now that they had started talking. She grinned at Arian, and he smiled back, and pretty soon they were both laughing their heads off.
Lia scowled in the direction of Merea and Arian's laughter. "I-i-i-it's n-not f-f-f-f-f-f-fun-funny," she said through chattering teeth, holding onto her shivering, sodden self.
"WARNING!"
Dex reached out and tapped the warning sign. It disappeared into the water and he sighed with relief.
"Actually, it kind of is," he grinned. "Someone falling off of their boat in the Tunnel of Love? Come on, if it had been Merea, would you have laughed?"
"Yeah…."
"Exactly."
Smoochy sounds echoed down the tunnel from Fitz and Sophie's boat.
Dex made a face. "Ew."
Lia laughed. "I'm with y-y-you on th-that one."
Dex looked at her sideways. "Aren't you freezing?"
"Y-yes, thanks t-to you."
"Why don't you take off your jacket?"
Lia stared at him. "Are you crazy? This is the only thing that's saving me from hypothermia!"
"Trust me, Lia, that thing is gonna give you hypothermia. It's soaked to the lining. It'll be better to have it off. Here, take mine. I can regulate my body temperature anyway."
Merea's voice echoed out of the distance. "Aw, Lia, wasn't that so sweet of him?"
"SHUT UP!" Lia yelled back, her face flaming. She pulled on the jacket.
"Hey Dex… Lia must look even cuuuter now…" Merea crooned.
Even in the dim light, Lia could see that Dex was blushing. "What are you and Arian doing back there anyway? You've been awfully quiet," he retorted.
Silence.
Lia turned and smirked at Dex. Then she leaned over and whispered, "Reactivate the warning sign… for their boat only."
Dex grinned. "Can do."
"AAAH!" Merea yelled, as the warning sign sprang up again.
"WARNING! WARNING! MUST HOLD HANDS TO PROCEED!"
She groaned. "Go away," Arian muttered.
"SORRY, NO. MUST HOLD HANDS TO PROCEED."
Merea whacked the sign and it sank below the water.
"Wow," she said in surprise. "That worked."
"Is it just me, or does this ride seem really, really, really long?" Arian asked.
Merea shrugged. "Whatever."
"Yeah, the more time you get to spend alone with Arian, the better," Lia called.
"Shut your piehole!"
"No, sorry," came the reply.
"Shut up, Lia," Arian said threateningly.
"Never!" Dex joined in. "It's payback time."
"Why aren't you guys holding hands, anyway?" said Lia. "You do it most of the time."
"That stupid sign ain't comin' back," yelled Merea. "Deal with it."
"You sure about that?" Dex replied.
"That... can't be good," whispered Arian.
"Okay, here's the plan," Lia murmured. "When their boat is about to leave the tunnel, the sign pops up, but instead of saying, 'must hold hands to proceed', it should say…" she lowered her voice. "Must kiss to proceed."
"Okay!" Dex said cheerfully. "I'm on it."
Lia was surprised by how happy he sounded. She poked him just to make sure. "Why do you feel so happy?"
"I want to get Arian back for some… things he said."
"What things?"
"Doesn't matter. Just about a person."
"About who? What person?"
Dex hesitated. "Like I said, it doesn't matter."
Lia could practically feel his embarrassment (well technically she literally could… but… whatever).
A pinprick of light showed in front of them.
"YES!" Lia crowed. "I see the end!"
"YEAH!" yelled Dex. "Gonna be outta here!"
As their boat neared the end, Lia gave Dex a high-five. "We made it!"
"WARNING! MUST KISS TO PROCEED. WARNING! WARNING!"
"What?!" Lia said in astonishment. She turned to Dex, who was looking stricken. "What went wrong?" she demanded.
"I forgot to make it only their boat," he whispered. "Now…" he turned to look at her and swallowed. "It's for our boat too."
"Well, program it away!"
"I can't... I made it unhackable, so Merea and Arian would have to do it!"
"But you're a Technopath!" Lia said desperately.
"I know, but… not even a Technopath can take down the unhackable barrier!"
Lia stared at him.
"WHAT?!"
Merea squinted and saw the light in the distance. She turned to Arian. "We're almost there!"
"Yes!" Arian looked relieved.
Merea sat and stared at the ceiling as the boat sailed lazily through the water. But in a couple of minutes she was jolted out of her daze as a sign popped up.
"WARNING! MUST KISS TO PROCEED. WARNING! WARNING!"
"Aah!" Merea slapped the sign, but it bounced back. She and Arian took turns hitting it with every available arm or leg, but the sign really did not want to go away.
Merea stuffed her fingers in her ears and sang the most annoying song she could think of. Loudly.
"MEREA! IS THAT YOU SINGING THAT STUPID 'SHAKE IT OFF' SONG?!" Lia yelled.
"I CAN'T HEAR YOU!" Merea shouted back.
"WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING!" the sign screamed louder than the rest of them.
Merea decided to get it over with. She leaned over and kissed Arian, then resumed her original zombie pose. The sign next to their boat disappeared, but she could still hear the "WARNING! WARNING!" echoing down the tunnel.
"Lia!" Merea yelled gleefully. "Do you have that too?"
"YES!" came a loud yell from Lia's boat.
"Just kiss him already!"
"NO!" Lia shrieked.
"Does my breath smell that bad?" Dex said, trying but failing to laugh.
"YES!" shouted Lia, right in his ear.
"The sooner you do it, the sooner we get out of here!" Merea yelled.
"I REFUSE! GO AWAY, YOU PSYCHOTIC SIGN!"
"WARNING! WARNING! WARNING!"
"NOOOO! YAAAAAAAH!" There was a splash. "NOT AGAIN! I HATE YOU, YOU DUMB SIGN!"
Lia crawled for the second time back onto the boat. "Stupid sign."
"WARNING!"
Dex sighed. Before Lia could stop him he grabbed her and kissed her, immediately shoving her back into the water.
Lia and the sign both disappeared under the surface.
When Lia emerged, sopping wet, shocked, confused, and annoyed, Dex immediately turned scarlet.
"I didn't do that, by the way," he said.
"Course you didn't. You just… hacked the sign away."
Silence.
"My eardrums have been saved," Dex added.
"Mine too."
More silence.
Dex broke it. "I need a hot pretzel."
"What's a pretshelle? Some kind of crab?"
"No. You'll see."
"Phew. No more of that dumb ride," Merea said.
"Are you kidding? That was the best ride ever!" said Biana.
Keefe shrugged. "Says you."
Dex looked slyly at him. "The smoochy sounds don't lie, Keefe."
Keefe turned tomato-red and mumbled something about needing the bathroom before scurrying away.
Dex pulled Lia to a snack stand to show her what a hot pretzel was, and Merea and Biana went into a tourist shop. When they came out again they were laden with candy-filled fans, plastic frogs, those really annoying long things where when you turn them over they go WOOOOOOOP, and those really weird water-filled blobs.
"What is this?" Biana asked, a look of disgust on her face as she prodded the blob.
"Look." Sophie grabbed a yellow one and threw it on the pavement. First it splatted like a pancake, and then it resumed its round blobness.
"Cool," said Keefe, who had reappeared behind the group. He grabbed about eight of them and started to very badly juggle them, randomly splatting them on the pavement. Merea grabbed two of the long things and turned them continuously. WOOOP. WOOOP. WOOOP. WOOOP. WOOOP. WOOOP. WOOOP. WOOOP.
"WILL YOU STOP THAT?" yelled Lia, munching on a hot pretzel.
WOOOP. WOOOP. WOOOP.
Fitz grabbed one of the candy fans and pushed the button several times, making it spit out M&Ms, and then stuffed all the candy in his mouth at once.
"Ew," Sophie said. Fitz immediately swallowed, nearly choking. Keefe thumped him on the back, forgetting that he still had one of the blobs in his hand. It exploded and drenched Fitz.
"Oopsy." Keefe grinned. Merea took the chance to eat the rest of the candy in Fitz's little fan.
Fitz glared at her.
"Sharing is caring!" sniggered Keefe.
Fitz evidently decided that he'd had enough. He went on a rampage, grabbing two WOOP things and repeatedly shaking them, while stomping on the blobs and spraying candy from the candy fans everywhere.
"What the-" Sophie jumped back.
Biana and Merea caught all of the candy they could, eating as much as could fit in their mouths. Sophie threw what was left of the blobs in the garbage. Lia sighed and dragged Dex back to the pretzel stand. Keefe helped Fitz annoy everyone by grabbing some more WOOP things. And Arian sat on a bench with his hands over his ears. Merea joined him, copying his pose.
Biana went into the souvenir shop and bought some fluffy pink earmuffs. She jammed them onto her head and stonily sat on the bench.
Dex appeared, dragging Lia. "Look!" he said excitedly. "A ticket booth! More rides!"
"Oh, please, no…" Fitz groaned.
"I want to go on the Dumbo ride!" squealed Merea. "Come on, Lia."
"NOOOOO! THAT'S FOR BABIES!" yelled Lia.
"Oh pish. It'll be fun." Merea pulled Lia towards the ticket booth.
"I highly doubt that."
Merea snagged two tickets and handed one to Lia, heading over to stand in line.
"Isn't it cool?" she asked Lia as the plastic elephants whirred over their heads.
"No."
Merea rolled her eyes. "Party pooper."
"I am not a- YAAAAAAAAH!"
One of the plastic elephants caught on her hoodie and lifted her into the air. The three year old who was currently riding with his sister grabbed Lia's hair and pulled. Hard.
"OW! LET GO!"
He laughed and clapped his hands, while his five-year-old sister grabbed Lia's hoodie and dragged her in. "Hi," she said toothily.
"H-hi," Lia said. "MEREA! I WILL GET YOU FOR THIS!"
"But I didn't do anything," Merea said innocently.
"YOU DRAGGED ME TO THIS STUPID RIDE! YOU WILL PAY!"
"I don't know what you're talking about."
Lia grumbled but stayed in the ride. When the ride stopped, Lia got out with a sigh of relief. But Merea yanked her back, handed the tickets to the ride operator, and shoved Lia into the flying elephant car.
"I already went!" complained Lia.
"Not with me you didn't," said Merea. "Shut up and ride."