Oh geez I am a failure at life! It has been so long since I updated this, heck since I even looked at this story. I wouldn't be surprised if no one is even reading this thing anymore, and I really can't blame them. DX I have been having boredom and computer problems so that is part of the problem, but that is no excuse. As a make-up present this one is gonna be longer then this stories original chapters. So finally after what seems like forever, here is newest chapter of Silent Murder!

3:31 p.m.

I stared at the ceiling not really seeing it. Ever since the funeral everything at seemed to have gone by in a haze.

Mattie was gone.

It just didn't seem possible. Ever since we had been born we had been closer than regular brothers. We were twins, though we didn't look very alike. He had always been quieter, and more gental than me, with a soft spoken voice and light wavy hair. Now he was gone and it felt like a part of me had been ripped away.

Every time I looked in the mirror I saw him staring back at me.

It was terrifying, in a way. To see someone who you had just seen buried, standing before you. Not long after that first glance in the mirror, I took down every mirror in the apartment, afraid that if I was forced to see his face instead of my own any longer, that I wouldn't be able to control my grief.

I heard the phone ringing again, but just like every other time it had done so, I ignored it. I didn't even need to listen to the messages to know what they were about. Everyone saying they were sorry, that they were there for me, that is was going to be okay.

But it wasn't.

Sorry didn't change the fact that Mattie was gone, or the fact that I wasn't there for him when he needed me most. It didn't change that now I was left alone, my last true family member taken from me because of something he knew, something that I knew too now.

They had told me that it had been a gun that had ended it, that he had died quickly, but they hadn't added that extra reassuring lie that it had been painless. I had seen enough documentaries, and heard enough to know that gun wounds were anything, but painless.

There was a piercing beep as another message was left.

I knew that I would have to face them eventually, one way or another. I was touching that they were so concerned, but also kind of twisted in a way. It was the same when anyone dies.

Even during a funeral people feel sorry for the one closest to the deceased, not the deceased themselves. It's as though once a person is gone, they aren't even worth feeling sorry for. Yeah I know everyone says they are going to a better place, but what about everything that theyhad to lose to go there?

All the friends, families, dreams.

All of that gone in the blink of an eye.

I rolled on my side and glanced at the clock. It was long past lunch, but I couldn't even stand the thought of food. My gaze shifted to my wallet lying a little off to the side, and I slowly reached over and grabbed it. Flipping it open I found myself staring at a picture of me and Mattie.

It had been taken just a little after graduation; right after Mattie had been accepted to college. In the picture we were both smiling. I had my arm around his shoulders, and he was holding both of our drinks. Just looking at it brought a little smile to my face.

Those had been the good times, when we were still trying to make our debut in this world.

It had been one of the first times we had really enjoyed ourselves after our parents divorced, and it seemed like after that everything had gone right.

I had also managed to get into a college, with a scholarship, like Matt. After we had graduated from that, we somehow both managed to get good jobs. Me as a mechanic, and Mattie as an emergency veterinarian at an animal rehabilitation center.

After that we had drifted apart a little, but we still kept in constant contact, always finding time to call or meet up somewhere.

So how is it that he got himself into something like this without me knowing? Sure he had seemed a little distant as of late, but I never would have though it could have been connected to something like this.

Why didn't he tell me?

"I never wanted to have to get you involved…"

"Heh, I think I'm pretty involved now Mattie." I whispered.

Then hanging my head, I gave in, and allowed myself to truly cry for the first time.

(line)

It was almost five before I felt up to getting something to eat. I shuffled into my little kitchen and began to scavenge the pantry for anything thing to eat. I found that after crying I felt immensely better, like something had been lifted from my heart.

I finally found that there was nothing worth eating and ordered pizza. Then, grabbing the phone, I went and sat on the couch.

For a while I just stared at the little white machine, unsure of what to do. I knew that he should listen to the messages. I also knew that once I did he would have to call them back, but I wasn't sure I was ready for that just yet.

It was as if I were to talk about Mattie's death with someone else, that it would make it real, even though I already knew it was. Eventually I made the decision to just do it and get it over with. I was just about to press the call button that would play the messages when suddenly the doorbell rang.

For a moment I just sat there, thinking that it was one of my friends come to see if I was alright, but then I remembered my earlier call for pizza. I glanced at and started in surprise.

I had been sitting there for almost a half hour. Sighing I heaved myself from the comfortable mountain of pillows I had unconsciously created. Staring at the mound I was reminded of my childhood for when I was younger and something mad me depressed or scared I would create a pillow fort and wait it out.

Some childish habits die hard, but even now it was still comforting.

I was drawn from my thoughts by a sharp series of raps on the front door. Realizing that the delivery man was still standing out there I quickly grabbed some cash from the counter and made my way to the front hall.

I was in for a surprise when I looked through the peep hole and saw none other than Arthur Kirkland standing on my doorstep holding two large pizzas.

More than a little confused I undid the lock and opened the door.

The other man looked up as the door opened and just kind of stared at me for a minute like he didn't know what to do. Judging from his appearance he defiantly wasn't the pizza delivery person. He was dressed in a simple white shirt with something written across the chest, though the pizza boxes covered half of it, and some jeans. Nothing formal, but still fashionable in a sense.

I thought of what I must look like, and was a little embarrassed. I was still wearing the dress shirt from my funeral attire, with the top few buttons open and some black boxers. Everything on me was wrinkled and my hair was probably a disaster. All in all I looked a complete mess.

A small throat clearing brought my gaze back to the others face as I remembered that he was still standing on my front step.

"Ah, I hope you can pardon the intrusion." He said, his voice still carrying that heavy British accent I had noticed during our first meeting. "The bloody idiots at the pizza parlor brought these to the wrong apartment. I noticed your name on the recent and figured I would bring it over." At this he cracked a small smile.

"Oh." Was all I could think to say, and I felt like a complete idiot, though if he thought the same he gave no sign, simply holding out the pizza, which I took carefully, noticing how hot it still was. He must have brought it right over.

He was about to leave when suddenly something hit me.

"Oh, hey wait!"

He turned around, one bushy eyebrow slightly raised.

"Ah thanks for bring this over, it's was really nice of you, but what about the payment? There is no way they just gave it over to you without paying something. So how much do I owe yo-"

He cut me off with a shake of his head. "No it was nothing really, and you owe me nothing." He paused for a moment as if thinking about something, and then pulled a half smile. "Think of it as thanks for putting up with me so far."

That really confused me. "But this is the first time I have talked to you since we met…" That's when I realized that I had told him I would help him move in. Even if I hadn't really been up to doing anything like that it still wasn't right of me to have blown him off like that.

"Oh, about today, I'm sorry I blew you off today, it's just, you know…"

Again he cut me off. "I understand completely, it's never easy to lose someone you are close to, it's not surprising that you would forget something a trivial as helping a complete stranger move in." I could tell he meant it, but it still didn't lessen the guilt.

"Ya, but that's still no excuse, um, how about you come in for dinner, I mean if you don't already have plans. As you can see I have plenty." I said lifting the pizza boxes a little.

"Well only if it is not too much trouble, you don't have to do this just because you feel guilty." He shrugged.

'Yes I do.' I thought, but as I let him inside I realized that that was only part of the reason. I also just didn't want to have to be alone. Even if Mattie hadn't lived here, the house still felt emptier for some reason.

After I that I directed him to the living room I told him to make himself comfortable and I went to change in to something more appropriate. When I returned I found him seated on the love seat, glancing idly around the room.

"I know it's kind of a mess, but I've been having to stay at work overtime lately and really haven't gotten around to cleaning.

Once again he waved off my excuses. "Anything is better than the current state of my house. Boxes and a mattress, the living quarters of a king!"

We both laughed a little at this, and started our dinner.

As the time passed I learned a lot about the British police officer. I now knew that he had moved to America from England because of family issues, and to pursue a decent career path. He had just started working locally two years ago, but was already one of the area's best.

The most surprising was his age. Just a mere four years above my own twenty four. When I mentioned my guess at his age, he had balked and acted angry, but it didn't last long.

Before either of us realized it, it was long past seven and the street lights had turned on.

"Ah man I didn't realize how late it was." I laughed looking out the balcony window.

"Oh I'm truly sorry imposing on you for this long. I guess I'd best be going." Arthur said with a small chuckle.

"Yeah, but hey how about I come over and help you finish moving in? It's the least I can do for blowing you off today." Again they both laughed at this. "Right then, that would be much appreciated! Well then I guess I shall see you tomorrow."

With that he made his way over to the door and was gone. I plopped down on the couch with a small smile on his face. In just a few hours this man had learned more about him then most of my oldest friends didn't know, and I could already call him a friend. That's when I realized that something felt different.

I wasn't as sad anymore, and I felt like I had found something almost as special as Mattie. Still smiling I left everything where it was and went to bed, sleeping more fitfully in then I had in years.

(line)

Well I figured this would be a good place to stop since I have some thinking to do about what happens next. If you have any ideas please PM me and I will try to use them but please no romance. This is not supposed to be a yaoi story. They worst it will be is have some fluff but there will be no heavy romance! Thanks for read and hope to update soon XD