Hellooooo! I'm VERY SORRY for not updating sooner. But I promise this will be the best chapter yet!! It's the angsty one where Kakashi and Iruka are suffering from the separation and people are getting mad at them! :'(

Enough about that though. On with the show!

Disclaimer: Me own Naruto? NO. NEIN. Just... NO.

Chapter Four

When he first learned that Asuma was going to be a father, Kakashi couldn't have been more ecstatic. It was always the dream of the Sarutobi family to keep their seed planted in the history of the Leaf Village. But more importantly to Kakashi, one of his closest friends had finally found someone to love. And that someone was Kurenai, a perfect woman who was dedicated to everything she did and kind to everyone she met. Kakashi had no doubt that she and Asuma would have a blessed family and live out the rest of their days as a beautiful couple and proud parents.

However, while Kakashi was extremely happy with the news, he was also saddened. Asuma was a very skilled ninja and an outstanding jounin. Asuma was also one of the few comrades that Kakashi worked well with. That's why Kakashi couldn't help but be a little poignant as he and Asuma stood outside of Tsunade's office.

"You know…" Kakashi began as he turned towards Asuma. "With the birth of your baby, you won't be able to do as many missions anymore. We'll miss you on the front."

Asuma took a drag from his cigarette and formed a perfect smoke ring as he exhaled. He then smiled at Kakashi.

"I know you will." He sighed. "But if that's what it takes to help Kurenai raise our child, then I'm willing to drop being a ninja all together. I want to be a good father, Kakashi. Like my dad was."

"Well, the Third always wanted you to settle down and have a family of your own." Kakashi said genuinely. "Plus, he favored Kurenai as one of the best kunoichi. He wouldn't want anyone else at your side but her."

"He loved Kurenai almost as much as I do." Asuma chuckled. "He kept telling me that a woman like her doesn't come along very often in this lifetime. He wanted me to jump at the first chance I got with her. And I did."

"You definitely jumped on Kurenai in a heartbeat…" Kakashi said quietly.

Upon hearing this comment, Asuma scoffed and punched Kakashi playfully in the shoulder. They were both laughing now.

"Kakashi, you pervert." Asuma said lightly.

Suddenly, the two jounin heard footsteps clacking from behind them. They were loudly approached until they came to a stop. Kakashi and Asuma both turned to greet the new arrival.

"Yo." Shikamaru addressed them in his usual monotone.

"Hey, Shikamaru." Asuma replied. Kakashi simply waved to the younger shinobi.

"Asuma-sensei, you ready to get briefed?" Shikamaru inquired. Asuma nodded as Shikamaru knocked on the door.

"Come in!" Tsunade's harsh voice barked from inside.

Shikamaru opened the door and entered quickly. Asuma was prepared to follow, yet he was stopped short when Kakashi clapped a hand on his shoulder.

"You're going up against the Akatsuki on this one. Give them hell, Asuma." Kakashi told him seriously.

Asuma puffed on his cigarette. "Right."

Then, Asuma blinked as though remembering something. He pinched the cigarette between two fingers and removed it from his mouth. He handed it to Kakashi with a cough.

"Get rid of this for me, would you?" Asuma asked. "I'm trying to quit."

"Sure thing."

Kakashi stood there for a moment staring at the wooden finish of the door as it closed behind Asuma. Kakashi's eyes were glued to the door, a feeling of dread sinking in his chest for some reason. On his way out, the ominous feeling continued to nag at him. He kept the smoldering cigarette gripped very tightly in his hand.

As Kakashi left Tsunade's office that day, he didn't realize that Asuma would never return from that mission, and Asuma wouldn't become the father he aspired to be.

****

Kakashi stood before Asuma's grave, his hands shoved into his pockets. He couldn't take his eyes off of the breathtaking sunset that illuminated a fiery glow across the cemetery. The beauty of it was so peaceful, and it made him nostalgic. He swallowed thickly as he knelt before the tombstone.

"How did you do it, Asuma…?" He whispered. It took everything he had to keep his voice steady. His whole body trembled as the wind picked up and swirled through his silver hair.

Meanwhile, at the Academy, Iruka was sitting at his desk, his head cradled in his hands. The teacher had yet another massive headache. He was hoping that it would go away before his students came back from their shuriken practice, but he highly doubted it. Iruka had been plagued with these migraines for the past week.

From the open window next to him, the breeze picked up and briskly swept into the room. Iruka lifted his head, letting the cool air hit his face. He breathed in through his nose and crossed over to the window, standing still for a moment. He couldn't help but smile upon seeing his students charging back from the practice field, laughing and calling to one another in mischievous banter.

But the one thing that kept nagging at Iruka was a particular absence outside the Academy doors. The large oak tree was missing a visit from its daily guest. Iruka bit his lower lip until he could taste a bit of blood.

It killed him. It killed him that Kakashi wasn't there and hadn't been there like he always was, leaning against the trunk with a heartfelt smile from behind his mask and a quick wave. As he took a moment to picture it, Iruka felt his heart break.

This always happened! Whenever someone was becoming closer and closer to Iruka, he would push them away. Every time! Why was he so resistant to let anyone in? Iruka's balled fist landed on the hard window sill with frustration. His eyes were stinging as he gritted his teeth together.

Suddenly, from behind him, Iruka heard a shocked gasp. Iruka whirled around to see his students, staring at him with their mouths agape. Iruka took a gulp and tried his best to put forth a smile.

"You got another headache, Iruka-sensei?" A redheaded girl asked tentatively. Iruka sucked in some air and put his hands behind his head.

"Don't worry about me. I'm fine." He assured her. "Now, all of you gather your things. I'm letting class out early today."

The students cheered loudly and scrambled to get their belongings together. As they all jostled out of the room, Iruka fell into his chair with exhaustion, pinching the bridge of his nose. Absolutely no amount of pain killers was going to help him now.

Iruka then felt someone place a warm hand on his shoulder. He looked with surprise to find Konohamaru peering at him. The boy had a concerned look on his face. Iruka felt tears well in his eyes, and he blinked rapidly to keep them from spilling over.

"Iruka-sensei…" Konohamaru murmured. The chuunin looked away in embarrassment, wiping his eyes with his sleeves.

"I'm fine, Konohamaru." Iruka croaked. Konohamaru raised an eyebrow in disbelief as Iruka got to his feet.

"Really." Iruka added, shuffling the papers on his desk. "I've just got another splitting headache."

Konohamaru shook his head, but he gave Iruka a goofy grin. "Well, if you were up for it, Naruto and I were wondering if you wanna get some ramen with us."

Iruka's eyes widened as another student of his entered the room. Naruto towered over Konohamaru as he strode to his side, his blue eyes shining with excitement.

"What do you say, Iruka-sensei?" Naruto asked eagerly.

And that's when Iruka couldn't take it anymore. Looking at Naruto's bright face, something inside Iruka finally broke. Naruto was nothing less of a son to him, and it was useless to keep anything hidden anymore. He was tired of fighting his own feelings, tired of holding them back. That's why he couldn't help but be a little relieved when his shoulders shook and sobs escaped him.

Naruto and Konohamaru were both taken aback by their teacher's sudden outburst. The older boy rushed to Iruka's side and hugged him tenderly.

Iruka was blubbering. "I-I-I can't do t-this, Naruto. I'm e-exhausted, I can't s-sleep, I can't t-think, I can't d-do anything without b-being… LIKE THIS!"

"What do you mean, Iruka-sensei?" Naruto managed. Iruka simply shook his head, at a loss of words. Naruto's mouth pressed into a firm line, and he glanced tentatively at Konohamaru.

"You should be getting home, Konohamaru." The blonde shinobi mumbled.

"But, niichan--" Konohamaru began to complain.

"Don't." Naruto cut him off abruptly. Konohamaru's expression was blank as he stared at Naruto. Naruto gave him a stern look.

"Just don't, Konohamaru."

Iruka sniffled, still grasping Naruto tightly. He could hear a disappointed sigh and Konohamaru's heavy footsteps leaving the room.

"Forgive me, Naruto. I didn't mean…" Iruka trailed off. Naruto separated from his teacher and laughed softly.

"It's alright." Naruto said. "Now c'mon. Let's get you cleaned up."

****

Like every other night in the past week, Kakashi found himself lounging on the couch, reading "Make-Out Tactics" while a pot of water was coming to a boil in the kitchen. Not only was his increasing laziness (meaning that he didn't stand up for more than 5 minutes at a time, and he didn't go outside except to monitor Naruto's training or visit the cemetery) becoming a problem, but his diet had been strictly ramen. For the past week.

Kakashi scoffed. He had even picked up Naruto's eating habits.

Suddenly, there was a sharp series of knocks at his door. Kakashi inhaled deeply and placed his bookmark between the book's pages to keep his spot. Then, he slowly got to his feet and crossed the room.

Upon opening the door, Kakashi wasn't surprised when he saw who his visitor was. Yamato was staring intently at him.

"You look like you've been living in a cave." Yamato commented. Kakashi shrugged and signaled Yamato to come in.

"I practically have."

Yamato chuckled as Kakashi plopped back onto the couch. As Kakashi picked up his book and continued from where he had left off, Yamato glanced around the house. Clothes were littering the living room floor. Dirty dishes and glasses filled the kitchen sink to the very brim. The trash bin Kakashi kept near the door had already overflowed with nothing but ramen cups.

"Kakashi-senpai." Yamato sighed. "This place looks hideous. You really should tidy up and get yourself back on track."

Kakashi resumed reading as though he hadn't heard. Yamato rolled his eyes and stepped into the kitchen, where the heated water was bubbling over and making the stove sizzle and steam. Yamato turned off the stove. The water eased.

"You know, this always happens when you're upset about something." He called into the living room. "You should say what's on your mind, not keep everything bottled up."

"You're one to talk." Kakashi responded. The silver-haired jounin wasn't up to having this conversation with Yamato, mostly because they hadn't talked like this since… then.

Yamato returned to the living room and sat in the lounge chair Kakashi had put next to the bookshelf. He sat forward, placing his elbows on his knees and propping his head on his hands. It was a habit, something Yamato always did when he was trying to get something out of Kakashi.

Kakashi didn't like it. Especially with how Yamato peered at him.

"I don't know what you're problem is, Kakashi-senpai." Yamato explained with concern. "You've been cooping yourself up in this cluttered apartment, gorging yourself with ramen, and reading that book. You hardly speak whenever we're helping Naruto train. Just tell me what's wrong."

"I'm reading, Tenzou." Kakashi told him.

"Don't call me that." Yamato said indifferently. "You know I hate it when you call me that. It reminds me of when we were in a relationship."

In one, swift movement, Kakashi snapped his novel shut. "You shouldn't have to bring that up every time I call you 'Tenzou.'"

"Well, it seems like you never want to hear about it. What's wrong with remembering the times we had together?" Yamato pressed.

"It was in the past. That's why." Kakashi simply stated. "We shouldn't revisit the past."

Yamato sighed, rubbing his eyes furiously. Then, he stood up and headed for the door. He didn't look back as he grabbed the doorknob.

"I'm headed out for drinks with Izumo and Kotetsu. You can join us if you like." Yamato offered.

"Pass." Kakashi answered bluntly.

Yamato looked over his shoulder at Kakashi, who was now sitting up straight and staring off into space. Yamato shrugged and began to leave.

"Well, staying might be for the best. Meeting up with old pals would be too much in the past for you."

There you have it! Hopefully it won't take too long for me to conjure up a 5th chapter. ^^; Anyways, hope you enjoyed it!