Nausea Alert! This chapter starts off kind of gross - I could barely write it, but the story must go on, so here goes.

Chapter 4

Deciding that it was time to get to the truth and take his life back, Jason climbed the stairs with an almost heavy heart. If he was wrong, he would be hurting someone he loved who had been good to him, in a really cruel and unforgivable way. But if he wasn't wrong, if Sam wasn't wrong, he needed to put an end to the lies this very night.

The room was as he'd suspected she'd been setting it up, several large candles lit on the dresser, soft music coming from the stereo and Elizabeth, his new and angelic wife, was laying in the middle of their bed, a lovely vision in white lace, waiting for him. "What took you so, long? I was about to come see if you'd forgotten about me." She sat up on her knees and reached her hand out to signal him to come to her.

Jason walked over slowly and leant down over the bed, bracing down on his fists as he leant into her and whispered, "forget my wife on our honeymoon? What kind of husband would I be to do such a thing?"

She smiled seductively as she realized she was about to get her way. "You're the very best husband there is, and I'm going to show you just how good I'm going to be to you, starting tonight."

She clasped his face between her hands and brought his lips to lock with hers. As she kissed him and ran her hands through his hair, she slowly moved them down over his strong arms, pulling him towards the bed, laying back as she went, guiding his body down to cover hers. She parted her legs and wrapped them around his as he braced his arms on either side of her head on the mattress.

Jason let his lips leave hers to travel to her neck, using his tongue to tease and caress the soft skin then trailing back up to her earlobe where he worked it between his teeth lightly. "You're so beautiful, Elizabeth. You're everything I've ever wanted."

Elizabeth was in heaven. Jason's tongue, his lips, his words all she'd ever need was him. He was hers and he was here with her the way she knew it was meant to be. "I love you, Jason. I've loved you for so long."

Jason kissed a trail down her neck and back up to her lips, putting everything into the kiss, using his tongue to dance with hers to make her light headed, whispering as he moved to kiss her chin and bathe it with his tongue, his fingers kneading at her breasts. "I wasted so much time. Time that we could've always been this good together?" He kissed her hard again before he added, "But you knew, didn't you baby? You knew when I was so blind. How can I ever make it up to you?"

Elizabeth was giddy with need, "love me forever." His kisses had her wet, left her yearning for more, more, as his strong hands roamed her body, a fiery trail blazing everywhere he touched. "I knew from that first night I brought you home you'd never leave me again." His tongue in her ear made her dizzy. She loved him and he was hers, would be hers forever after tonight. "We'd make love and you'd never leave me again." She moved to kiss his lips but they were no longer on her, his entire body was moving away from hers. She smiled up at him, waiting for him to shed the clothes he'd stood up to rid himself of, but he wasn't undressing, instead he was just staring at her, his face a stern mask, seemingly…angry?

Eyes that had looked at her with such desire only moments before were now icy cold and accusing. It took a moment for her to realize what had happened, for the fog to clear from her enraptured mind and the words spoken between them to register.

She stuttered as he backed away from the bed, away from her as though stung and repulsed. "J-Jason, what is it? What's wrong?"

"How long?" he glared at her as if seeing her for the first time, having heard the words with his own ears, yet disbelieving their authenticity still.

When she didn't immediately respond his temper flared, "HOW LONG HAVE YOU KNOWN?"

She recoiled as if he'd slapped her, but Jason was not to be deterred. She would tell him the truth if he had to drag it out of her. She tried to stall, tried to come up with a quick lie, her wits failing her miserably. "Know what, Jason?"

He was back on the bed now, menacingly close to her face. "What night exactly was it that you knew that I wouldn't leave? You know, the first night that you brought me home?"

She needed to turn things around and quickly. "Jason, please, you misunderstood. I only meant that…" he cut her off before she could finish.

"Before you speak, before you dig this hole even deeper for yourself, know that if you tell me ONE more lie I will walk through that door and you will never see me again."

He was so cold, she could not believe this was the same man who had her on fire just a minute ago. She looked in his eyes and saw the promise in his words and she knew that her only hope now was to come clean. "Jason, please, you don't know what you're saying."

He looked into her eyes, his own probing and distrusting. "What did you mean by I'd never leave you again?"

Elizabeth was in a panic but her mind kept racing to find a way out, to explain everything she'd done. Surely, he loved her enough to understand? He always forgave her everything, he would forgive her now, right? She couldn't take that gamble, would try one more hand. "I only meant that you'd left me once before, when Hayden showed up, so when you came back I knew you'd never leave again. Our love had been tested, but she'd lied, and you were free to pursue a life with me and my boys." She was sure she could keep rambling until she'd talked her way out.

Jason felt the disappointment hit his heart and he couldn't believe he hadn't seen any of the signs before now. She was so edgy, so desperate for him to believe whatever tale she spun. His voice was low and biting. "Problem with that Elizabeth, is that I didn't leave you when Hayden showed up, you left me. You insisted that I go back to my wife, so think again about my question and try to tell the truth this time." He aligned his face with hers, cold eyes level with frantic ones, his nostril flaring in barely contained fury. "This is it, Elizabeth, consider your next words very carefully, they will determine what happens next."

He was seething with a quiet anger and Elizabeth couldn't fathom how they got here. How had her perfect romantic evening that started off with such promise, gone so very, very wrong?

"How long, Elizabeth, how long did you know I was Jason Morgan?" he asked again.

It was no use. He would catch her in another lie and then he'd leave. She couldn't risk it. "The Nurses Ball," she whispered.

He straightened up from the bed, looking down at her with acute disappointment lacing his eyes.

"May? You've known who I was since May?" He felt like the wind had been knocked out of his sail, as if someone had kicked him in the gut just for the hell of it. He started a path across the room, then whipped back to face her, "why? Why would you do this?"

She knew she could make him understand. Jason loved her and they could get through anything. "It was my time to be with you, Jason." She hurried to continue when she saw the incredulous look cross his face. "You and I have wanted to be together for so long, have loved each other for so long, but the timing was never right for us. Something, someone else, always got in our way." She was pleading for him to understand, "but that night as I stood on the stage and I looked out at everyone, they were so happy, Sam was with Patrick and Emma, she had moved on and Patrick, Patrick loved her so much." She saw him take a step back, his face telling her that she was losing him with her explanation, so she hurried on, "and you, you had found your way back to me without even knowing who you were. Face it Jason, you didn't fall back in love with Sam, you didn't connect to Carly or any of them, you fell in love with me, you remembered our son. You even remembered my name. I knew Jason, I knew then that a miracle had brought you back to me, and we could finally have our time."

His expression hadn't changed, he still looked at her as though she had taken complete leave of all her senses. "Our time? What the hell is that? You let my wife, my mother, everybody who loved me continue to believe I was dead because you thought it was our time? Have you always been this crazy and I just didn't see it?"

"Jason, you know in your heart that you and I belong together. You love me, you've wanted to be with me for years. When you came back you no longer had any obligations to Sonny and the mob, you didn't have to run around cleaning up after Carly and her ungrateful bunch and Sam and Danny were happy with Patrick. You were free and clear to be with me and you were happy, we were happy, finally." She lunged off the bed and threw herself at him, grabbing his arms to make him hear her, aware that her barely there lingerie was still all she wore and praying it would help her convince him.

Jason picked up her robe from the bed and threw it at her. "I had you pegged for a decent, kind individual Elizabeth, where has this needy, insecure girl been hiding all this time?" He wanted to shake some sense into her. "What gave you the right to play God with my life? With any of our lives? What gave you the right to decide that my family shouldn't stop missing me and grieving for me? What gave you the right to decide that my mother didn't get to know that she had one child left that she hadn't buried? How do you know that this experience hadn't changed me enough to make me want to change my life? How do you know that after what I'd been through, what my family had been through, that I wouldn't have stayed out of the mob for my mother, for my sons, for myself?" He really wanted to shake her, and so he backed up a few steps away from being tempted. "Your opinion of me is that I'm so weak that I can't decide for myself what life I get to lead and with whom I get to lead it?" His voice shook with anger and venom when he asked, "just who the hell do you think you are?"

Why wasn't she getting through to him, couldn't make him listen? Jason had always forgiven her and loved her through everything. "I'm the mother of your child, that's who I am. We have a son who needed you, I needed you. I'm the woman who's always loved you and this was our time, Jason."

He spat the words at her angrily, "you are not the only mother of my child Elizabeth! Sam and I built a life together, we have a son. She had the right to know that her husband didn't die and my son had a right to know his father. What makes your son more special than Danny - because he came from you? They are both my sons and they both have a right to know me and know that I'm their father! "

"Jason, please I love you, you know I do."

"You have no idea what that means. You stood by and watched me struggle for months to find out who I was, when all along you could have put me out of my misery. You could've easily saved me so much anxiety about my past and what kind of future I was going to be able to offer you and your children. You could've saved the people I care about months of pain and grief…love would have made you care enough to do those things.

He wasn't done with her. "What made your so called love for me any more important than theirs? Sam was my wife! My wife, Elizabeth. Whether you like it or not, I chose to marry her, to build a life with her, to give her my son and my heart, and I can assure you that she had my heart. I may not remember everything about my past but I remember how I feel about her and there's no way I would've willing left her for anyone, so I guess you know exactly why you lied. It wasn't for me, it wasn't for Sam, or Patrick, or anyone else but Elizabeth!

"Wait, Jason you remember?"

"I remember enough to know that I chose the life that I lived. My choices were my own, and the people who loved me supported those choices, they supported me."

"Then you should remember that you and I have always been great friends, and you should remember that you loved me before this. You know me, I know that you do!"

"What I know is that you knew exactly what you were doing! What exactly were you planning to do when I remembered my life? What were you going to do when I found out, and you and I both know that I would eventually find out, so what was the plan, mmm?"

He noticed how she turned red and pulled her robe closer to her body. Jason turned his head to slowly scan the room, then rest back on her when she couldn't meet his eyes. "You're kidding, right? Tell me you're joking?" Only, she wasn't laughing.

He stepped back and laughed dryly, rubbing an angry hand over his nose and mouth, to then raise his arms and shrug his shoulders. "Then again why not, right? I mean it worked like a charm before so why not?" His teeth were clenched as he spat out, "why not get pregnant again, accidentally on purpose this time?" He shook his head astonishingly when she didn't answer. "Who are you, Elizabeth? Has this always been who you were?"

"That's not fair, Jason. You and I are married and we love each other, what's wrong with us having another baby out of that love?"

"If you have to ask that question then I have no words for you." He swung his hand sweepingly in her direction, "I'm done here. I'm done with you and I'm done with this. Tomorrow, I call Diane to get this thing annulled and you can expect to work out a custody arrangement for Jake." He turned to leave but she stopped him by clinging to his arm, forcing him to face her again.

"So that's it? We have a disagreement and you just leave? You are my husband, Jason, we can work this out."

He shrugged her arm off and backed up towards the door. "I was Sam's husband before that Elizabeth, but that didn't matter much to you when you were plotting and scheming, so why should it matter now?"

"So what, you're just going to run crawling back to Sam, is that it?"

"If Sam would have me I would crawl on broken glass to get her back, but the truth is I don't know if she would even give me the time of day anymore. I'm damn sure going to try though, I can promise you that."

Without another word he walked away from her and out the door, needing to get as far away as fast as he could.

Jason slammed his way through the house and out the front door, jumping on his bike and speeding towards the outskirts of town. He rode for hours on end, the cold wind whipping his face and stinging his eyes, but still he rode. He couldn't figure out how he had allowed himself to get so used. Somehow, when he wasn't looking his life had become a free for all and it was open market on using Jason Morgan. Helena Cassadine thought she had every right to use him to execute anyone, including his wife, Nicholas Cassadine thought he should use him for monetary gain, and now the woman he'd loved thought she should use him as her personal puppet and bed warmer. When had his life been taken over without him noticing? All this time he'd thought he'd been making his own decisions and playing by his own rules but he was just an oblivious fool. The only person in his life who had allowed him to live by his own rules without expecting something from him was the one person who'd been hurt the most by it all. She got hurt when he died leaving her to raise their infant son by herself, and when he came back he kept right on hurting her for someone who it turned out didn't deserve to even speak her name. He didn't know how he'd go about making it up to her but he knew he had to come up with something.

After spending hours on the road that did very little to ease his mind, Jason headed back to town and realized that he needed a place to go. His emotions were still in turmoil but he was calmer and no longer felt the need to hit something. He thought about going to the MetroCourt but if Carly saw him she would have a million questions that he was not yet ready to answer, and if she didn't see him she would learn from the staff by tomorrow that he'd checked in and he would be faced with the same predicament. Just then Jason remembered that his key chain had a key for the penthouse at Harborview Towers. He knew that Sam's mom and sister had moved into a house so the penthouse was once again empty. He thought about calling Sam to check with her before heading over, but seeing the late hour he decided he'd talk to her the following day. He would need to explain everything to her and face her reaction anyway, so why not get some rest before facing that daunting task. He knew that was not going to be an easy conversation and could only pray that she wasn't still angry about their last run in.

Jason turned the key and entered the penthouse, grateful for the quiet ambiance that it had always provided. He hadn't been there since the night Helena had sent him to kill his wife, and as he looked around the darkened living room, he couldn't stop the shudder that ran through him when he thought about that night. He couldn't see being able to live with himself if he's armed her at Helena's bidding. The thought led him to wonder just how many times he'd threatened Sam's life in the past? He remembered the incident surrounding Jake and then there was the time that he freed Faison from police custody. How she could stand to look at him and not haul off and clobber him every time she saw him was a miracle. Jason moved through the darkened living room to the kitchen and grabbed a beer from the fridge. That hadn't changed either, the top shelf still held his favorite ice cold brew. He'd just popped the cap and start to take a swig when the kitchen was flooded with light and the clear sound of a gun cocking got his immediate attention.