"And we're back to Total Drama Shuffle Party!" Chris said as he stood on the Dock of Shame. "In our last episode, our contestants began playing the long-term game. On The Best Team, Nestor and Rowan began plotting to get rid of Shadya, attempting to turn Steve Jenkins against her. On the Luscious Lollipops, Gretchen roped Dean and Wisdom into an alliance to counter the trio of Jim, Louise, and Virgil. On the Knights of Goodness, Kirkland, Kun, and Rhiannon all vied for Liberty's loyalty, with mixed results. On Team I Don't Know, Hiram expressed a disdain towards Fred, while Elmer teamed up with Fred.
"The teams split into pairs to divide and conquer three different smaller challenges. The Best Team were the clear frontrunners, thanks in no small part to their advantage they won from the first challenge, but Team I Don't Know managed to get in some good time as well. It was a close race, but in the end, the Luscious Lollipops fell behind, forcing one of them to be the first boot. Jim's alliance had Dean in their sights, while Gretchen's alliance had Jim in their sights. Thanks to Wisdom tricking Jim into voting for Gretchen, the desperate father-to-be got the most votes against him, sending him home.
"What will happen amongst the Luscious Lollipops now? Will the other teams have to succumb to elimination? Only one way to find out. This... is Total! Drama! Sh-Sh-Sh-SHUFFLE PARTY!"
The five remaining Luscious Lollipops returned to camp.
"What the hell was that?!" Virgil snapped. He approached Dean. "What did you do?!"
"M-Me?!" Dean panicked.
"Obviously Dean isn't smart enough to pull off a move like that," Gretchen commented. "Think about it. You know you didn't flip, right Virgil? And obviously, Jim didn't flip."
"...Hey, wait a minute!" Louise realized. "You're not trying to pin this on me, are you? Because I'm just as lost as Virgil, here."
"Actually, didn't Jimmy Beans say something about a deal with Strawberry, here?" Virgil remembered as he pointed to Wisdom.
"...Huh?" Wisdom asked as if she hadn't been paying attention.
"What deal did you make with Jimmy Beans to get him to flip?" Virgil leered.
"Does it matter what I said to Jim?" Wisdom mused. "Does knowing the exact details of what we discussed in the past truly affect the present? The future?"
"Wisdom's right," Dean said. "Jim's gone now. There's nothing we can do about that but try harder in the next challenge."
"Don't even get me started," Virgil spat. "You're the reason we lost, remember? It should have been you to go."
"Look, we're all upset about what happened. I get it," Louise mediated. "Let's use that passion to drive us towards winning tomorrow! And make sure we never have to vote anyone out again."
"Yeah, I agree," Gretchen said. "Voting once was fun, but I'd rather not do it again for a while, you know?"
"I'm taking a walk," Virgil told his teammates as he left the scene.
"Stay safe," Louise frowned.
Confessional:
Virgil: I'm so pissed right now. Jimmy Beans was neurotic, but he wasn't a bad guy. He kept the team strong. And now what have we got? Strawberry? Sour Grapes? Freaking Dean? Ugh, I just... What kind of idiocy?!
Wisdom: Will Virgil continue to be blinded by rage? Will he come to resent me for simply trying to keep my ally safe? And why does he keep calling me Strawberry if he's cross with me? It sounds so endearing, doesn't it?
Louise: I'm just not a fan of conflict, or, like, negative emotions in general, so tonight was not a good first impression of an elimination ceremony. I always kind of assumed my first vote would be an easy vote for someone that everyone wanted to see gone, but that couldn't be further from the truth. I won't let it keep me down, though! I just need to dust myself off and keep moving forward.
Morning shone over the cave housing the Knights of Goodness. Hildegard exited the cave and began stretching.
"O, most lovely morn!" Hildegard smiled. "I eagerly await today's caress!"
Liberty approached the campfire with a bundle of sticks in her arms.
"Liberty? Awakest thou so soon?" Hildegard queried.
"Huh?" Liberty flinched. "I, uh... What happened to your helmet?"
Hildegard felt the top of her head. Sure enough, her helmet had gone.
"Odd. Must have left it in the cave," Hildegard figured.
"Eh," Liberty shrugged. She dumped the pile of sticks on the fire and returned to the cave just as Rhiannon and Kun exited.
"Was that Liberty, awake, on purpose?" Rhiannon asked Hildegard.
"Perhaps," Hildegard thought aloud.
"She can't, um, sleep 24/7," Kun figured. "She may have tended to camp overnight."
"That'd explain the mango husk she just left here," Rhiannon giggled as she picked up the discarded fruit leftovers and tossed them in the fire.
Kirkland lumbered out of the cave with an annoyed look on his face. Tegan, still fast asleep, had wrapped her arms and legs around him from behind.
"Looks like someone made a friend," Rhiannon joked.
"Hildegard, by any chance are you willing to impale me and this hellspawn with that spear of yours?" Kirkland droned.
"Nay! My holy lance is for defending our camp and for hunting beasts which we dine," Hildegard answered.
"Defend our camp from her, please," Kirkland seethed as he tried prying Tegan off of him, with minimal results.
Confessional:
Liberty: (She shrugs.) I got bored and felt like exploring. Figured I'd bring some firewood or something to get the others off my back.
Kirkland: I don't know what Tegan's obsession with me is all about, but all it's doing is making me more and more eager to vote her out. I swear, I'm this close to finding somewhere else to sleep just so she won't latch onto me again. I feel nauseous just thinking about it.
Tegan: Teehee. Kirkityland is a funny! And who doesn't like a funny? I love love love love a funny so so so much! They make me XD. (She tries recreating an XD face with her actual face.)
Team I Don't Know ate breakfast around the campfire - more nuts and berries.
"Thanks again for getting breakfast for us, Mark," Elmer complimented.
"Oh, no problem," Mark responded. "I'm happy to provide for my team."
"Hey, didn't you say you were going to get a hunting stick and kill us some meat or something?" Fred asked. "How's that coming along?"
"Be grateful for what you have," Hiram frowned. "I didn't see you helping collect food."
"I was asleep!" Fred insisted. "I could totally provide for the team if Mark didn't keep beating me to the punch!"
"Such foolish bluster. Blind in both sight and mind. You yield no results," Roxie commented.
"Yeah, if you're so confident in yourself, then you catch us some more food," Hiram leered.
"Hey, Roxie, that was a haiku!" Bunko pointed out.
"A what?" Roxie asked harshly.
"A haiku! It's a kind of poem that Japan invented," Bunko explained. "Five syllables, then seven, then five. Not as fun as caricatures, but they're neat."
"Never heard of it," Roxie said as she put her mask on.
"Really?" Elmer asked in disbelief.
"Either way, it was a coincidence," Roxie stated. "Mind your own business, Bunko."
"Hey! Bunko was just sharing a fun fact with us!" Hiram snapped. "Leave her alone!"
Everyone looked awkwardly at Hiram, except Fred who faced Hiram but of course could not look at him.
"...What? There's no need to be rude," Hiram frowned.
Confessional:
Hiram: There's never a need to be rude to Bunko. She's the nicest person in the game, and she'd never hurt a fly. What did she do to deserve Roxie dismissing her like that?
Bunko: I was born in Japan, you know. My parents grew up there, too, of course. We moved to Canada before I could really remember, but my parents still taught me all about Japanese culture. I know a haiku when I hear one.
Roxie: (She is smoking a cigarette.) Fred's an idiot. And I guess Hiram hates me. This team is so screwed... Ugh, freaking Bunko. I was dreading this topic. Won't elaborate.
The Best Team, as a group of six, searched through the forest for supplies.
"Are you sure one of us shouldn't have stuck by camp to watch the fire?" Ginger asked.
"Even if our fire should burn out, we can ignite it once again through the flames of passion!" Jeremy proclaimed.
"I want to build a sense of camaraderie between our team members," Shadya stated. "I want to re-emphasize that we are a team and that all six of us bring something to the table."
"Especially me!" Steve Jenkins chimed in.
"Yes, whatever you say," Shadya said dismissively.
"I knew she'd come around," Steve Jenkins whispered to Rowan.
"You're getting there," Rowan told him. "You'll take your true position as head of the team, yet."
"So what are we on the lookout for, babes?" Nestor asked Shadya. "We already have blankets and pillows. What else do we need?"
"More materials in case we need to repair the shelter," Shadya began listing. "More food to keep our energy up and hunger down. Making valuable memories as we explore the island together."
"No kidding?" Nestor asked skeptically.
"Shadya is more than just a badass! She has empathy out the wazoo as well!" Jeremy mentioned proudly.
Shadya sighed. "Thank you, Jeremy."
Rowan glanced at Jeremy with a sly smirk.
Confessional:
Rowan: I've made it my goal to make Steve Jenkins want to overthrow Shadya as the team leader. Once he makes his intentions public, and Shadya begins to oppose him, then Jeremy will obviously force himself into the conflict, and I know Nestor's been working on Ginger... And here I thought turning everyone against each other would be difficult. (She chuckles daintily.)
Shadya: Jeremy is obviously a fan of mine, which is nice as far as having a loyal ally is concerned, but he keeps feeling the need to decide what's best for me or step in to speak for me like I'm some princess who can't do things for herself. Isn't the fact that I can do things for myself the whole reason he's a fan in the first place? I need to talk with him about this.
Ginger: I didn't want to make memories bonding with people nor did I want to exert myself before we have a challenge and it's actually necessary. The only reason I went along with the others is in case they all suddenly decided as a collective to vote me off. Hey, you never know!
Gretchen led Wisdom to a part of the forest away from camp.
"Okay, we need to talk about last night's vote," Gretchen said sternly.
"Why are you upset?" Wisdom asked. "The vote went the way you wanted, right?"
"It's not about how the vote turned out, it's about... how it... What did you go behind my back for?!" Gretchen snapped.
"What's wrong with going the extra mile to make sure things go according to plan?" Wisdom figured.
"I was doing just fine telling Louise to vote for Jim!" Gretchen insisted.
"Jim? Didn't you say you were going to tell her to vote for Virgil?" Wisdom asked. "Did you really think Louise would vote for Jim?"
"Look, I don't need your back-talk right now, missy," Gretchen glowered.
"Is that any way to treat your ally?" Wisdom asked. "Is that any way to treat the person who ensured you held the majority on this team?"
"Don't get self-righteous with me. It's not a good look on you," Gretchen scoffed.
"Any worse than it looks on you?" Wisdom asked.
"I don't have to take this!" Gretchen declared as she stormed off.
Confessional:
Gretchen: Of all the smug, condescending little... Okay, deep breaths, Gretchen. Having literally the worst possible allies in the game does wonders for your underdog status. People like an underdog. Roll with the punches.
Wisdom: When will Gretchen accept that she isn't very good at this game and that she needs Dean and me more than we need her?
Rhiannon sat next to a sleeping Liberty in the Knights of Goodness cave, absentmindedly running her fingers through the sleepyhead's hair when Kun entered.
"Um, may I speak with the two of you?" Kun asked.
"Hey, Liberty, sweetie," Rhiannon said softly as she shook Liberty awake. "Kun wants to talk to us."
"I don't wannaaaaaaa..." Liberty moaned.
"He won't be long," Rhiannon told Liberty as she glanced at Kun.
"I just, um, was wondering what you two thought of Hildegard in regards to, um, her potential role as team leader when compared to mine," Kun said.
"You both suck," Liberty griped as she sat up.
"But, um, she sucks more, yes?" Kun coaxed.
"Eh," Liberty responded.
"Well, um, I would like to offer that we vote out Hildegard at our earliest convenience," Kun continued.
"I thought we were voting Tegan or whoever," Liberty mentioned.
"Tegan?" Kun asked. "When did this happen? Did Hildegard put you up to it?"
"Kun. Tegan and Hildegard are friends," Rhiannon reminded him. "But, since you asked, Kirkland has been pushing to get rid of her."
"...Oh. I see," Kun said pensively. "And, um, what do you think of Kirkland?"
"As a person or as someone who might vote for Hildegard?" Rhiannon asked.
"As a person," Kun answered.
"He's kind of sour, but I don't think he's actively malicious," Rhiannon said.
"Hm," Kun emoted. "Well, um, thanks for talking, Rhiannon. Liberty."
Liberty had already fallen back asleep.
"No problem," Rhiannon winked.
Confessional:
Kun: Perhaps I may have, um, misestimated my competition for, um, team leader. From what I have gathered, it seems as though only Tegan seems to hold Hildegard in any sort of high regard. But if Kirkland is already pushing to get the vote his way... that may prove detrimental to my leadership. They may see him as the man in charge. I may, um, need to do something about this.
Rhiannon: The others can go around with their rivalries and all that, but I'm more than content to get friendly with everyone. And for once I mean that perfectly platonically. People are more inclined to listen to people who listen to them, you know.
Liberty: Urgh... Why can't people just talk about votes after we lose and it's actually relevant?
Bunko and Hiram strolled along the beach near their campsite.
"This is nice," Hiram smiled. "I never get to do things like this back home. I don't really have any beaches. Or friends."
"What?!" Bunko gasped.
"Yeah, I live in Saskatchewan, and we don't have any oceans," Hiram explained.
"Not that. What do you mean you don't have friends?" Bunko frowned.
"Well, I have my mommy," Hiram mentioned.
"But besides that?" Bunko asked.
"Nope," Hiram said as he shook his head. "I'm not really one to put myself out there. Frankly, I'm surprised you and Mark were so willing to help me out in that first challenge, let alone afterward."
"Of course!" Bunko said with a big smile. "You're a sweet guy, Hiram. I'm proud to call you my friend."
Hiram's face turned bright red. The tender moment was interrupted when Fred ran directly into Hiram from behind, knocking both boys to the ground.
"Ah!" Bunko gasped. "Are you guys alright?"
"Fred! What was that?!" Hiram snapped.
"Heh. Sorry, fam," Fred apologized as he stood up and dusted himself off. "Just going on a jog. What are you guys up to?"
"Taking a nice walk on the beach," Bunko said cheerily. "Want to join us?"
"Nah, I want to get a feel for my surroundings so I can get around without trying to smell cigarettes," Fred declined.
"Good luck! I know you can do it!" Bunko chirped.
"Thanks, B!" Fred grinned as he resumed his jog... directly into the ocean.
Confessional:
Bunko: It's so inspiring that I have teammates who are coming out of their shells like they are! Hiram is really shy, Fred is blind, and Mark has amnesia. Roxie's a tough nut to crack, but there's no nut that can't be busted!
Fred: I hate having to rely on anyone for anything, and that includes Roxie with her "follow the smoke" nonsense! If I can map out the places surrounding the camp in my head, I won't need her anymore.
Hiram: Listen to Fred. Calling her "B" like they're such close friends. Who does he think he is? I just want him to get lost. Literally.
Rowan ascended the mountain path up to camp when she began to overhear a conversation.
"Jeremy, we need to talk," she heard Shadya say.
"I would love to," she heard Jeremy say.
"What have we here?" Rowan muttered to herself as she kept herself hidden.
"I understand that you look up to me and my accomplishments in mountaineering, but I don't feel comfortable with the pedestal you've put me on," Shadya told Jeremy.
"I... don't understand," Jeremy frowned, taken aback. "You've always been proud of your accomplishments."
"Of course I am. Who wouldn't be?" Shadya said. "But the mentality that I'm stronger and smarter than everyone, though entirely correct, is going to cause the other five members of this team to think as though I'm the only one on the team that matters, which could cause them to start slacking, which could cost us challenges."
"Everybody matters and everybody can do whatever they desire!" Jeremy declared. "...You're right, though. I guess I'm just so starstruck meeting someone who's climbed Everest. Even I haven't done that yet."
"I may be skilled in myriad ways, but I am still only one person," Shadya reminded him. "A chain is only as strong as its weakest link, and I want to keep our links strong."
"And we are all strong in our own ways!" Jeremy said proudly. "But not as strong as you!"
Shadya glared at him.
"Er, sorry. Force of habit," Jeremy chuckled.
"Interesting..." Rowan muttered.
Confessional:
Rowan: Those two settled that awfully quickly, but there is definitely still some friction there that could be used to generate heat, which could... spark a flame if you will. I'm sure I could think of some way to use this to plant ideas in Jeremy's head, I'm just not sure of how exactly to do that, yet. Either way, those two are a dangerous duo that I do not want to stick together.
Shadya: Of course I was aware of the possibility of someone out here recognizing me, but I was not expecting... well, Jeremy. I put it in a way he would understand. The truth is I just find his obsession with me to be not only creepy and annoying, but potentially detrimental. If everyone else sees me as the massive threat that I am, it could make me a target.
Jeremy: Shadya is living proof that you can accomplish anything you set your mind to! She is a symbol of everything I believe in and hold dear to myself. So I guess it is kind of easy to get carried away with her. I'd hate for her to get mad at me, though, so I'll do what I can to bring it down a notch.
Louise sat down in her team's shelter, eating a granola bar.
"One upside of Jim not being here: I can eat these without him telling me I shouldn't," Louise told herself.
"Oh, are we allowed to eat the granola bars, now?" Dean asked as he walked up to her.
"Might as well, right?" Louise told him. "We need to keep our strength up."
"True," Dean agreed as he took a granola bar from the team's box.
"Not that one!" Louise shouted.
"Ack!" Dean flinched as he dropped the bar.
"Sorry. Virgil called dibs on the cranberry ones," Louise explained.
"Right," Dean said awkwardly.
"So, you're working with Gretchen, huh?" Louise asked.
"Yeah, sorry," Dean apologized. "I don't know who she wants out next. If it were up to me, it'd be Virgil."
"No kidding?" Virgil asked from behind Dean.
"Ack!" Dean jumped.
"Virgil! Don't scare the poor kid," Louise scolded.
"He literally just said he wants to vote me out," Virgil said flatly.
"Sorry," Dean moped.
"What if I offered another option?" Louise asked.
"What?" Dean and Virgil asked in unison.
"Dean, do you enjoy working for Gretchen?" Louise asked.
"I mean..." Dean non-answered.
"I think the three of us should vote her off," Louise said.
"You're joking," Virgil grunted. "I'm voting for Dean next time we lose. No ifs, ands, or buts about it."
"Well, I can't really argue with that," Dean said.
Louise sighed.
Confessional:
Louise: I was hoping to pull Dean into my alliance with Virgil so we could get rid of Gretchen. She treats him horribly, and he just lets her walk all over him. It's terrible. What awful luck, Virgil showing up at the worst possible time. I hope I can keep Dean convinced to get rid of Gretchen.
Dean: Yeah, Gretchen picks on me, but so do a lot of people, so it's not a big deal to me. Besides, at least she offered to keep me safe if I voted with her. I don't think Virgil really has the same sentiment. Nothing against Louise, but I don't see us working out as allies.
Virgil: I mean, yeah, Sour Grapes is really annoying, but even she pulls her weight around camp and in challenges more than Dean does. We can vote her out after we get rid of Dean.
Kirkland had climbed to the top of the waterfall that fell over his team's cave and sat by the stream, looking out over the campfire. Hildegard returned to camp after a bout of hunting, with a freshly-caught rabbit pierced on the head of her spear.
"Soft, Kirkland!" Hildegard called.
"Shh!" Kirkland shushed harshly. "Don't alert her to where I am."
"If thou referest to little Tegan, I lost her during our hunting excursion," Hildegard admitted.
"Good call not searching for her," Kirkland chuckled. "Looks like that's not the first thing you've lost today."
"Ay, my holy helm appears to have been misplaced," Hildegard admitted. "As for Tegan, I trust she can find her way back. I felt it best to cook this before it goes bad." She removed the rabbit from her spear and approached the campfire.
"Why do you put up with Tegan, anyway?" Kirkland scoffed.
"She is but a young chick, rife with energy" Hildegard excused. "I hold no enmity towards children."
"Children are one thing. Tegan is a whole other beast," Kirkland seethed.
"Rawr!" Tegan shouted as she jumped out of a bush. "I was here all along!"
"I did trowest you could return," Hildegard smiled.
"Kirkland! I said rawr!" Tegan pouted.
"I heard you the first time!" Kirkland shouted back.
"Why didn't you say rawr back?" Tegan frowned.
"Because I'm not four years old anymore," Kirkland snarked.
Tegan burst into tears.
"Shame on thee, Kirkland, making a lady cry!" Hildegard scolded.
"I didn't do anything!" Kirkland said exasperatedly.
"'Rawr' means 'I love you' in dinosaur!" Hildegard informed him angrily.
"First of all, why do you know that?" Kirkland asked. "Secondly, even if I knew that, I don't love her. I have made this publicly known."
Tegan sobbed harder. Hildegard pulled her in for a hug and patted her on the shoulder. She glared at Kirkland. Kirkland rolled his eyes.
Confessional:
Tegan: I changed my mind! Kirkityland is NOT a funny! He's just a MEANIE!
Kirkland: Yeah, great, Tegan stalks me, harasses me, grabs me in my sleep, refuses to listen when I tell her to stop, and somehow I'm the bad guy! Screw Tegan, screw Hildegard, I'm firmly in the camp of "Kun for team leader".
Hildegard: If thou asketh me, Kirkland is but jealous of little Tegan still having her youthful innocence and lust for life. I can only hope the bitter taste in his mouth does not ruin the taste of the rabbit I caught.
Elmer, Mark, and Roxie sat around the campfire at their campsite.
"So, Elmer, what's life like back at home?" Mark inquired. "Not remembering my own past has made me curious about everyone else's."
"Oh, well..." Elmer thought about it. "I lead a relatively quiet life. I get good grades, and I'm really good at math in particular. I'll be honest, I don't have a whole lot to give you."
"What about Louise?" Roxie mentioned.
"Hey, I'm not just 'Louise's boyfriend', you know," Elmer huffed.
"The fact that you're dating another contestant is the most interesting thing about you that I know of," Roxie stated.
"Well, how about this," Elmer twitched. "I'll demonstrate my brain power right now. I think we should all be in an alliance."
"An alliance?" Mark asked.
"Yes, I think we should all vote the same way every time we're up for elimination," Elmer explained.
"...I'm confused," Mark admitted. "What purpose does that serve?"
"It ensures that none of us will be voted out on the off chance that we do lose," Elmer explained.
"So we'd have to vote for Fred, Bunko, or Hiram, right?" Mark pieced together.
"Look, I know you're friends with Bunko and Hiram, but in this game, you want strong allies," Elmer said. "Allies who can keep you safe when it comes down to it. Roxie's tough, and I'm smart. Bunko and Hiram, well..."
Elmer glanced at the shelter, where Bunko and Hiram were sitting and playing patty-cake.
"I'm feeling some sort of weird emotion," Mark admitted. "Confliction, I guess you could call it."
"That's understandable," Roxie said. "But hey, we don't have to vote for anyone right now. You have time to think about it."
"I suppose," Mark nodded. "So, Roxie, what's your past like?"
"Wouldn't you like to know?" Roxie smirked beneath her gas mask.
Confessional:
Elmer: I'm in a pretty bad position out here: on the outs of my team, separated from my girlfriend that everyone knows about and will probably target me for sooner or later. But I'm going to do my damnedest to get out of that position. I didn't come here for twenty-third place.
Mark: It's strange. I feel a bond with Bunko and Hiram, like I can trust them, even though I've only known them for a few days. But I'm supposed to vote them out because they aren't very strong? Something about that just doesn't make sense, but I can't place what.
Roxie: Alas, poor Elmer. He knows he's screwed if we lose. He probably is... Of course, he's not wrong. But he isn't right, either. How will this play out?
Ginger sojourned to the beach nearest her team's camp with everyone's water canteens, where she found Steve Jenkins admiring his reflection in the sea.
"Having fun?" Ginger quipped.
"Totally," Steve Jenkins grinned. "Hey, you're that robot girl, right?"
"Firstly, the name's Ginger, it's nice to meet you," Ginger said caustically.
"I'm Steve Jenkins," Steve Jenkins introduced.
"Secondly, I build robots. I myself am not a 'robot girl' per se," Ginger continued.
"...I don't get it," Steve Jenkins shrugged.
"Never mind," Ginger dismissed as she began refilling everyone's canteens.
"Say, what do you think about Shady?" Steve Jenkins inquired.
"Who?" Ginger asked. "Oh, Shadya? She's whatever."
"I don't care about your opinion of her," Steve Jenkins frowned. "The only personal opinion of yours that matters is your opinion of Steve Jenkins. I meant what do you think about her trying to act like the team belongs to her."
"I'm pretty sure the only one who genuinely believes that she runs the team is Jeremy," Ginger answered.
"Thank you!" Steve Jenkins agreed. "Obviously this is the team of Steve Jenkins."
"Hey, guys," Nestor greeted as he arrived on scene. "What's going on?"
"Nothing of value," Ginger answered.
"I thought I heard some tea on Jeremy and Shadya," Nestor said interestedly.
"Jeremy's a doofus and Shadya's full of herself," Ginger commented.
"Yeah, what lamers," Steve Jenkins chuckled.
"I thought you were into Shadya," Nestor told Steve Jenkins.
"She's cute, but anyone who thinks they're better than Steve Jenkins is just wrong," Steve Jenkins clarified.
Ginger and Nestor shared a skeptical glance.
Confessional:
Ginger: I'm aligned with Jeremy and Shadya, but that doesn't mean I'm not aware of their shortcomings. I'm aware of their shortcomings, but that doesn't mean I'm keen to just flip on them right away. I'll wait until the mid-merge to do that.
Nestor: I'm getting sketchy vibes from Ginger. I feel like she's going to be an issue if she sticks around, but is she a higher priority target than Shadya? I'm thinking not, but I'll keep an eye on that one.
Steve Jenkins: Man, that's a relief. I was afraid Shady thought she was running the place, but my team's smarter than that. You don't just have Steve Jenkins on your team and not listen blindly to everything he says.
The twenty-three contestants met up with Chris by the giant oak tree in the center of the island. Next to Chris were four small pedestals, each bolstering a large bowl with a different team's color.
"Welcome to your next challenge, contestants!" Chris introduced. "Winning teams, as you can see, Jim was voted out at last night's campfire ceremony."
Elmer breathed a sigh of relief.
"You seem relieved, Elmer," Chris commented.
"Well, er, Jim seemed like a big threat to win," Elmer explained.
"Oh. I thought you would have been happy that your girlfriend wasn't voted out," Bunko said cluelessly.
"Well, yes, that too," Elmer blushed.
Louise gave Elmer a confused look.
"Virgil, is losing Jim going to affect your team positively or negatively overall?" Chris asked.
"Well, Cupcake, everyone has a reason for casting the specific vote they do," Virgil responded sourly. "Jimmy Beans wouldn't be gone if a majority of people didn't somehow benefit from him going."
"Anyway, let's get to our next challenge!" Chris continued. "Like I said at the start of the game, Whenua Island is an island of the earth's bounty, and that means that all kinds of flora and plant life grow here."
"Don't 'flora' and 'plant life' mean the same thing?" Wisdom pointed out.
"It was for effect, smarty-pants," Chris said flatly. "Anyway, Whenua Island, with its fertile soil and humid climate, is home to all sorts of tropical plants. Your challenge today is a scavenger hunt. Your job is simply to find and retrieve three different fruit native to the island: a banana, a mango, and a dragonfruit. Place one of each in your team's bowl. The first three teams to do so will win Invincibility. Best Team, Team I Don't Know, and Knights of Goodness, since you all have an extra member, you'll have to sit someone out. The Best Team cannot sit out Ginger or Nestor since they sat out of the last one."
"I shall take respite for our team today!" Hildegard announced.
"...Wait, hey!" Liberty objected.
"Thou shan't worm thy way out of contributing so easily," Hildegard told Liberty.
"I will sit out of this one," Shadya volunteered.
"How come?" Rowan asked.
"This challenge doesn't require my skills," Shadya explained. "I trust you can win without me."
"Obviously, Fred is sitting out of this one, right?" Hiram asked.
"Hey, what's that supposed to mean?!" Fred snapped.
"It's a scavenger hunt, genius," Roxie commented. "Eyesight is literally the only thing you need to be able to contribute."
"If you sit out today, you'll be guaranteed to play in tomorrow's challenge," Bunko reminded him with a smile.
"Ugh. Fine," Fred reluctantly agreed.
"Alright, Hildegard, Shadya, and Fred will sit out," Chris announced. "Everyone else, the challenge starts... now!"
Confessional:
Virgil: Ah, fruit. Nature's candy. Actually, that's a terrible nickname for it, because no fruit comes anywhere near as close to being as delicious as candy. Except maybe pineapple.
Hildegard: I made Liberty join my team so that I could whip her into shape, something I have neglected of late! The rest of my team is such a handful as it is.
Fred: I don't know what Hiram's deal is, but I feel like the dude doesn't like me. I didn't do anything to him! I don't think I've even spoken to him one-on-one before!
Shadya: It's just as Bunko said: if I sit out of this one, I will have to compete in the next one. If we sit out a strong member today, we won't have to use a weak member tomorrow, as opposed to sitting out a weak member today and having to use them tomorrow. It's all about strategic sacrifices, so to speak.
The teams huddled to discuss strategies.
"Obviously, we'll be splitting up," Gretchen told her team. "Three fruit, and five of us. I'm thinking two pairs and one solo."
"That makes sense," Louise agreed.
"Wouldn't all of us going solo make more sense?" Wisdom asked.
"Two people can look through an area more thoroughly," Gretchen explained. "Anyway, Dean, you're coming with me."
"I am?" Dean asked as Gretchen grabbed him by the arm and dragged him off.
"You want to come with me, Virgil?" Louise offered.
Virgil shrugged. "Whatever," he agreed.
The two went off in a different direction from Dean and Gretchen. Wisdom, being left alone, took a third direction.
"I'm going with Libby!" Tegan announced.
"Who are you?" Liberty asked.
"I'm Tegan, silly billy!" Tegan giggled.
"Ohhhhhhhhh. That makes a lot of sense," Liberty realized.
"On that note, I'd prefer to work alone," Kirkland told his team as he left the scene.
"Good!" Tegan spat.
"I suppose that would leave, um, you and me," Kun told Rhiannon.
"I guess so~" Rhiannon purred.
"Please don't-" Liberty started before Tegan tackle-hugged Liberty and ran away with her.
Kun and Rhiannon shared a look before making their own way away.
"It looks like the other teams are splitting up into groups of two with one person going on their own," Mark noted. "Is that what we're supposed to do, or...?"
"The fruit will likely be in trees. Having a partner wouldn't hurt," Elmer figured.
"I want to go with Bunko," Hiram said.
"Ooh, yeah, can I go with Hiram?" Bunko agreed.
"You don't need our permission," Mark chuckled. "...Do they?" he asked Elmer and Roxie.
"Permission is lame. Do whatever you want to. Live your life your way," Roxie answered.
"Another haiku!" Bunko pointed out excitedly.
"Go away," Roxie leered.
"You go away!" Hiram scolded.
"Hey, Hiram, it's okay," Bunko frowned. "Let's go searching!"
The two left the scene.
"What say you, Mark? Want to work together?" Elmer offered.
"Uh, yeah, sure, if you don't mind," Mark agreed.
"Yeah, I work alone. So this all works out to me. See you when we win," Roxie agreed.
The three split up.
"Alright, let's split up, gang!" Steve Jenkins told his team.
"Oh, we're listening to you, now?" Ginger snarked.
"Tch. Please," Steve Jenkins scoffed. "You should have been listening to me always. I'm Steve Jenkins."
"So what's the plan?" Rowan urged.
"Rowan and Jeremy will be one pair. Ginger and I will be another," Steve Jenkins explained. "That leaves Nestor to go alone."
"Why am I stuck with you?" Ginger asked.
"If you're trying that sexual tension thing, it isn't working," Steve Jenkins dismissed.
"I think this is a good arrangement," Rowan said.
"It works for me, too," Nestor agreed.
"It doesn't matter how we split up! We are champions and can do anything we set our minds to!" Jeremy announced.
"Ugh. Fine," Ginger reluctantly agreed.
"Hell yeah. Split!" Steve Jenkins ordered.
The fivesome split up into the groups assigned.
Confessional:
Gretchen: Now that Jim is gone, Louise and Virgil are probably going to try to get Dean and Wisdom to flip to their side. Not on my watch! I'm keeping Dean on a leash. Which he'd probably like, he's so pathetic. Eugh, you know what, forget that analogy.
Kirkland: Finally, some peace and quiet. My team has been sorely, sorely lacking in that.
Bunko: I wonder if I'd get the chance to draw some fruit after the challenge is over. As much as I like doing caricatures of people, I want to branch out, you know? And who's ever done a caricature of fruit before?
Steve Jenkins: Rowan's smart, so I know she can convince Jeremy that Shady is no team leader. And, of course, I'm a genius, so I can convince Ginger to stick by me. I've got plans for days in this beautiful head of mine.
Louise and Virgil searched the island for the fruit they sought.
"I can't believe whether or not one of us avoids getting voted out hinges entirely on whether or not we can find fruit faster than the other teams," Virgil commented.
"Well hey, maybe we can get lucky," Louise encouraged.
"With how crappy our teammates are?" Virgil scoffed.
"That's... er... why it's luck instead of skill," Louise conceded.
"I still can't believe you wanted to work with Dean," Virgil mentioned.
"Well, he seemed like the most trustworthy option," Louise figured. "Wisdom tricked Jim into splitting his vote, and Gretchen... yeah."
"But it's Dean," Virgil pointed out flatly.
"I know he's not the strongest ally... or the smartest... or has the best social game..." Louise admitted. "But I think we can trust him more than Gretchen or Wisdom."
"I'd rather just throw him under the bus to Sour Grapes, to be honest," Virgil said.
"I don't know. Strategy is hard," Louise frowned.
"Strategy isn't hard. Having to share a team with Strawberry, Sour Grapes, and Dean is hard," Virgil clarified.
"And yet you're giving them nicknames," Louise chuckled.
"I give lots of people nicknames, Licorice," Virgil shrugged.
"Wait, why am I the worst candy?" Louise pouted.
"I'm going to pretend you didn't just say that," Virgil dismissed.
Kirkland peeked out from behind a tree that the two had just passed.
"Very interesting," Kirkland thought aloud.
Confessional:
Virgil: Realistically, getting any of the other three on my team to flip onto my and Louise's side is going to be both risky and a huge pain. But maybe we won't have to... Hm...
Kirkland: I hadn't considered that going alone would be good for eavesdropping on people from other teams. I shouldn't let myself get distracted, of course, but knowing the dynamics of the other teams could be invaluable in the future. Kehehe...
Kun and Rhiannon made their way through a different part of the island.
"Finding bananas should be no sweat for someone like me~" Rhiannon joked.
"I, um, knew you would say something like that," Kun mentioned.
Rhiannon gave Kun a look.
"N-Not that there's anything wrong with sexuality, but, um, the jokes are getting, um, predictable," Kun stammered.
Rhiannon stayed silent.
"So, um, our team..." Kun forced a conversation change. "Kind of messy, isn't it?"
"No kidding," Rhiannon agreed. "For what it's worth, I think Kirkland and Liberty are as against Hildegard being the team leader as you are. Although they might just be against Tegan, I'm not sure."
"That's, um, something," Kun smiled. "I'm, um, less concerned about Hildegard, though, as I am about Kirkland."
"Kirkland?" Rhiannon asked in disbelief. "He hates people as a concept. I don't see him clamoring to be the team leader."
"Well, no, but-" Kun cut himself off as he saw Bunko and Hiram in the distance, trying to climb up a tree.
"You think they found something?" Rhiannon asked.
Bunko propped Hiram up as Hiram pulled himself up the tree's branches.
"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Bunko asked.
"I trust you will keep me safe, Bunko," Hiram smiled. "I can do anything as long as you're with me."
Bunko looked up at Hiram with concern as he pulled himself up through the branches of the tree. No fruit was actually in the tree, but Hiram was able to peek out from the top of the tree to survey the surrounding area.
"Do you see anything?" Bunko called up.
"I think so," Hiram told her. "There's a pinkish fruit over that way."
"That might be a dragonfruit!" Bunko cheered.
Kun and Rhiannon glanced at each other hopefully.
Hiram jumped out of the tree, and Bunko barely caught him. She set him down, and the two ran off towards the fruit. Kun and Rhiannon discreetly followed.
Confessional:
Rhiannon: Shoot, I thought the racy jokes would be endearing and get people to underestimate me, but it looks like that's backfiring. That's embarrassing. ...Kun's concerned about Kirkland, huh? Interesting.
Bunko: I'm flattered that Hiram trusts me so much, but I don't want him to put himself in danger! I can't keep him safe from everything. I almost didn't catch him that time!
Roxie, with her mask down and a cigarette in her mouth, searched the island alone.
"Gah, it's nice finally getting a smoke without getting scolded by half my team," Roxie smiled.
"You're on the outs of your team, huh?" Nestor asked as he caught up to her.
"No, but Bunko's worried about my health, Hiram hates the smell, and Fred thinks I'm patronizing him because I've used them to guide him before," Roxie explained.
"Well, we should stick together anyway," Nestor said. "Making cross-team deals might get the producers to like us more, and the producers always help out their favorites. Remember Duncan in World Tour? I wish I didn't."
"I liked Duncan in all his seasons," Roxie said indignantly.
"And I'm still talking to you regardless of that fact, hon," Nestor said. "Anyway, Chris did mention that the game will change drastically every few rounds. I'm not sure how long that entails, exactly, but having friends in different places could benefit us."
"And what exactly do you have to bring to the table?" Roxie challenged.
"I know everything there is to know about Total Drama, sweets," Nestor reminded her. "I run a TD blog, remember? I know what it takes to win this game. Do you know what it takes to win this game?"
"Allies who aren't condescending scumbags, I'd imagine," Roxie snipped.
"If you're referring to Steve Jenkins, I don't intend to keep him around forever," Nestor said.
"I'll pass," Roxie scoffed.
"You'll come to regret that, babes," Nestor said.
"I'm sure," Roxie snarked.
Confessional:
Roxie: "Ooh, look at me, I'm hot property because I'm a NEET who has nothing better to do than overanalyze some dumb TV show". ...Yes, I know I signed up for this dumb TV show. Shut up.
Nestor: As I said before, I see Roxie as a very likely winner of this game, and I think sticking by her could be beneficial. Of course, if she won't have me, then I can do everything in my power to make sure she goes home. As of now, there isn't very much in my power, but I'll keep this in mind when we do shuffle things around.
Jeremy and Rowan scoured the area for fruit.
"This is just like our excursion this morning for camp supplies!" Jeremy beamed. "I just know that experience will give us the advantage."
"We've definitely grown close as a team," Rowan agreed. "I've noticed you and Shadya, in particular, seem to be getting along well."
"Haha. You think?" Jeremy asked as he rubbed the back of his neck.
"You spend a lot of time together," Rowan continued.
Jeremy sighed.
"Is something bothering you?" Rowan asked.
"Can I tell you something kind of personal?" Jeremy asked.
"Of course!" Rowan encouraged. "I'm your teammate. You can trust me."
"I think I might be developing feelings for Shadya," Jeremy admitted.
"Awwww," Rowan smiled.
"I always admired her from afar when I knew her as 'that girl who climbed Everest' but actually getting to meet her... She's so cool," Jeremy gave a small smile. "But I think I'm coming on too strong to her. I'm not trying to, but she doesn't seem comfortable with me complimenting her and such. So I'm asking your opinion as a woman. How do you think I should go about this?"
"I have definitely noticed you coming on pretty strong to her," Rowan began.
"...Oh," Jeremy frowned.
"And if you're making her uncomfortable with her advances, well, that certainly won't look good on you if someone gets the wrong idea," Rowan continued.
"What does that mea- Wait, what?!" Jeremy gasped. "I promise my intentions were pure! I-I would never..."
"If you ask me, I think you should keep your distance from Shadya for a while," Rowan said. "Even if people don't get that wrong idea, it's good to give her some space. Too much of any person can make that person wear thin on you."
"I see," Jeremy said. "Thanks for being honest with me, Rowan."
"It's what I do," Rowan smiled.
The two found Wisdom coming down from a tree with a banana in her hand.
"Hey, we needed a banana for the challenge, right?" Rowan asked Jeremy.
Jeremy nodded. The two made their way towards the tree.
Confessional:
Rowan: I will admit, I winged it for most of that conversation. I was still unsure of how I should use Jeremy's admiration towards Shadya against them, and then he just gave me the answer right then and there. It likely won't get Jeremy to vote her out - really, I'm not sure anything will - but if it keeps them separated, well, that's a start.
Wisdom: Should I have waited for them to pass me by before dropping down from the tree? Maybe, but would it have been worth the risk of falling and injuring myself? Will it truly cost us in the long run?
Hildegard, Shadya, and Fred had stayed by the giant oak tree with Chris.
"Man, this is boring," Fred complained. "Has anyone even come back with fruit yet?"
"Nay," Hildegard answered.
"There aren't many tropical fruit trees here on Whenua," Chris chuckled.
"I thought you said this was an island of bounty," Shadya mentioned.
"I say a lot of things," Chris responded.
"No jest," Hildegard smirked.
Jeremy and Rowan arrived with a banana. They placed it in their team's bowl.
"Excellent," Shadya smiled at her teammates.
Jeremy avoided eye contact. "Let's go find the other fruit, Rowan," he told his other teammate.
Rowan giggled. "Let's," she agreed.
The two ran off.
"What the...?" Shadya wondered.
Wisdom arrived with a banana of her own and placed it in her team's bowl.
"Am I the first one of the Lollipops to succeed in bringing fruit?" Wisdom wondered. "What could be holding the others up that I might be first?"
Wisdom wandered away.
"The Best Team and Luscious Lollipops are in the lead!" Chris announced. "But only barely. It's still up in the air!"
Bunko, Hiram, Kun, and Rhiannon all arrived at once. Hiram and Rhiannon each placed a dragonfruit in their respective team's bowls.
"And it's all tied up!" Chris corrected. "Each team with one fruit apiece."
"I can't believe they followed us," Bunko pouted to Hiram.
"We just need to be more careful," Hiram told her.
The two left the scene.
"Should we follow them?" Rhiannon asked Kun.
"Um, let's just go our own way," Kun suggested. "Let's not make more enemies than we, um, need to."
The two left the scene.
Confessional:
Shadya: Did Jeremy ignore me? I know I told him I wanted him to cool off with the hero worship, but ignoring me? That's not good. I may need a follow-up chat with him.
Dean and Gretchen made their own way through the island.
"Alright, Dean, we're in a tough spot," Gretchen said. "We're the only ones the other can trust on our team."
"What about Wisdom?" Dean asked.
"Don't be dense. She went behind our backs, remember?" Gretchen reminded him.
"She did?" Dean asked. "If you're talking about her deal with Jim, I was there. We were only trying to make things easier. And it worked."
Gretchen smacked Dean on the back of the head. "Why didn't you tell me, you idiot?!"
"What did you expect me to say?" Dean frowned. "'Hey, Gretchen, by the way, Wisdom and I just told Jim to vote for you.' We did it to save all three of us, and it worked, and you're still mad. Telling you could have put the plan at risk."
"You think you're so much smarter than me, huh?" Gretchen spat. "Just because the protagonist is never the smartest character doesn't mean you get to be the token smart one! You're just my bumbling sidekick! Don't forget that! Got it?!"
Dean sighed. "Yes, ma'am."
"Libbyyyyyyyyyyyyy!" Tegan called as she ran past the two. "Libby where are youuuuuuuuuuuuuuus?!" She ran back to Dean and Gretchen. "Hey, did you crazy cats see Libby anywheres?"
"Who?" Dean asked.
"No, we haven't," Gretchen informed her.
"What a whah," Tegan pouted. She ran off again.
"Can I just say how glad I am that she's not on our team?" Gretchen commented.
"I don't mind her," Dean said.
"Stop having opinions," Gretchen commented.
Dean hung his head.
Confessional:
Dean: I think Gretchen might just be jealous that someone other than her made a big move, even if it benefited her. I wouldn't dare say that to her face, of course, but there's really no reason to be so mad.
Tegan: I keep on losing my friendies and teammates! That is not sugoi! I needs to be more mindful, guys.
Kirkland continued to wander on his own.
"Man, I wish all the challenges were like this," Kirkland commented. "Just me on my own, looking around, snooping on other teams."
He spotted Elmer and Mark wandering around the island.
"The amnesia kid and the guy who's dating someone on another team? This should be juicy," Kirkland chuckled deviously as he snuck his way up to them and tried to listen in.
"I'm telling you, man, Bunko and Hiram are going to be loyal to each other over anyone else," Elmer told Mark. "You saw how quickly they said they wanted to search together for the challenge."
"That is true..." Mark admitted. "But they're still loyal to me, aren't they?"
"Well, think about it this way," Elmer continued. "If you join the alliance with me, Fred, and Roxie, that's four people, which is going to be stronger than three people any way you slice it."
"Wait, Fred?" Mark asked. "I thought we were going to vote for Fred if we lost."
"Well, er, uh..." Elmer stammered. "I may have neglected to mention Fred before, but trust me, working with us is so much smarter than working with Bunko and Hiram."
"How so?" Mark asked.
Elmer sighed. "I keep telling you. Roxie and I will always be more valuable allies then Bunko or Hiram. As for Fred, well, four votes is always better than three. Especially in a team of six where an unbroken tie could mean you going home by complete random chance."
"A lot of the intricacies of this game are still kind of lost on me," Mark admitted. "But you said you're a big fan of this show, right? You probably know what you're doing."
"I'm only telling you all this because I want to help you, Mark," Elmer said. "I know it probably looks bad that I'm telling you to turn on your friends, but you need to be adaptable in this game. Make new friends if necessary."
"That sounds tough, but it makes sense," Mark nodded. "Hey, is that a banana tree?"
Elmer looked up to where Mark pointed to find, indeed, a banana tree.
"Nice!" Elmer smiled. "Hopefully no one else on our team already found a banana,"
Kirkland, hiding behind a tree, snickered to himself.
Confessional:
Kirkland: So it's an even three-three split on Team I Don't Know, and Elmer's trying to work over Mark. Interesting. I wonder if it would benefit me any to tell Bunko and Hiram.
Mark: I may not remember very much, but I'm not stupid... or at least I don't think I am. I can't remember. Either way, what Elmer's trying to sell me seems really fishy. I'm trying to humor him, but I don't think I'll be turning on my friends anytime soon. It just doesn't feel like a good idea.
Ginger and Steve Jenkins scoured the island.
"Man, this is wack," Steve Jenkins complained. "We haven't found anything. I'm Steve Jenkins. The fruits should be lining up to get picked by me."
"I'm sure they usually are back home," Ginger sniggered.
"Excuse me?!" Steve Jenkins snapped. "What do you take me for? I'm Steve Jenkins! I'm not some homophobe who's uncomfortable getting attention from gay men! Any and all attention I get is warranted and appreciated."
"Alright, fine, don't go with the joke," Ginger said as she threw her hands up.
"It wasn't that funny," Steve Jenkins shrugged.
Ginger rolled her eyes.
"You know what is funny, though? Shady thinking she runs the place," Steve Jenkins laughed. "Please. As if any team with Steve Jenkins could have anyone else in charge."
"Yes, we've been over this before," Ginger said dryly.
"I know, but I want to make this, like a thing," Steve Jenkins said. "An alliance, I mean. I know you want a piece of Steve Jenkins, but I'm not that desperate yet."
"With an offer like that, how can I refuse?" Ginger snarked. "Also, are we going to talk about how those two are climbing that tree?"
Ginger jerked her thumb in the direction of Louise and Virgil. Virgil had just tossed a mango down from the tree for Louise to catch.
"Who cares about them? We need to focus on the challenge," Steve Jenkins opined.
Ginger grabbed Steve Jenkins by the ear and dragged him over to the mango tree.
"Ow! Ow! Ow!" Steve Jenkins cried.
Confessional:
Ginger: I don't know if Steve Jenkins was serious about that alliance offer, but either way, accepting it was the easiest way to get him to shut up about it. Why was I stuck with him again?
Virgil: Mango is an underutilized candy flavor. You mostly find it in international candy. Not that that's ever stopped me from getting some, but you couldn't just go to any old grocery store and find some. Damn shame.
Louise and Virgil returned to the oak tree and put a mango in their team's fruit bowl.
"Yes! We're in the lead!" Louise cheered. "Come on, Virgil. We have a dragonfruit to find!"
Virgil tossed a piece of bubblegum into his mouth. "Let's do it."
The two ran off just as Ginger and Steve Jenkins arrived to add a mango of their own to their team's bowl.
"Excellent work," Shadya nodded.
"The Best Team have now tied with the Luscious Lollipops for first place!" Chris announced.
"Come on, we can still get first!" Steve Jenkins encouraged Ginger as he ran off ahead.
"Yeah, no, I'm going this way," Ginger scoffed as she went the opposite direction from Steve Jenkins.
Elmer and Mark arrived with a banana for their team's fruit bowl.
"And Team I Don't Know are back in the running!" Chris announced.
"Nice! You can do it, teammate or teammates!" Fred cheered.
"It's Elmer and Mark," Elmer explained.
"Hell yeah! Bros for life!" Fred beamed.
"...Right," Mark muttered.
The two competing boys ran off.
"My good knights shan't fail me," Hildegard told herself.
Just then, Kirkland arrived with a banana for his team.
"Looks close," Kirkland commented as he placed his banana in his team's bowl, glancing at the other team's bowls.
"Hurry thyself!" Hildegard commanded. "To locate our final token of victory!"
"You're not helpful," Kirkland countered as he jogged off.
Confessional:
Fred: I'm not able to "officially" compete in this challenge, but that doesn't mean I can't cheer my team on, right? ...Look, man, I just hate being left out. It happens too much.
Hildegard: Hmph. I only opted not to help to put the pressure on mine own team to work harder. Something Kirkland appears to have forgotten.
Dean and Gretchen continued to meander throughout the island.
"I can't believe we still haven't found anything," Gretchen griped.
"It's a big island," Dean offered. "And I doubt they'd put the fruit trees so close to each other."
"It's still stupid," Gretchen grumbled. "Losing the first challenge might make me an underdog, sure, but losing the first two? That'll pretty much just guarantee that no one on our team wins."
"We shouldn't give up," Dean smiled. "No matter how dire things get, there's always a way."
"Is that what you tell yourself every day to keep yourself from breaking down in tears under the sheer weight of your own unlikability?" Gretchen asked.
"...Yes," Dean admitted.
"Hey, you two~!" Nestor greeted as he ran up to the duo.
"Oh, great, it's you. What do you want?" Gretchen asked.
"I want that hot goss, girl," Nestor said. "Voting Jim out first? Over people like Wisdom or Dean? What happened there?"
"Hey, I'm right he-" Dean frowned.
"None of your business," Gretchen interrupted. "I don't owe you anything."
"I think he's just here to tease us," Dean chimed in.
"Why, Dean, I'm hurt," Nestor smirked.
"You're about to be if you don't leave us alone," Gretchen threatened.
"Alright, but I'll keep this in mind for the future," Nestor said. "We won't be in our four teams forever, you know."
"Do you think threatening him was a good idea?" Dean asked Gretchen as Nestor walked off. "He said he writes a Total Drama blog, right? He probably knows all about strategy."
"If that was true, he wouldn't be a douchewaffle to people on other teams and acting like he wants to be our friend and ally," Gretchen sniffed.
Confessional:
Gretchen: It's Total Drama 101. If you want people to stick with you, you need to be personable and agreeable to them. Like me.
Nestor: Voting out a threat like Jim over a weaker teammate is the exact kind of thing I would do. I'm targeting Shadya, aren't I? Gretchen always made me out to be her rival, but I think we could work together. Her ego's the size of Camp Wawanakwa, though, so working around that might be tough.
Roxie continued her own search throughout the island.
"I should have found something. After so much time searching. This is annoying," Roxie mused.
She noticed something pale blue on the ground off in the distance. She approached it to find Liberty, fast asleep, with a mango in her hands.
"Well, that's convenient," Roxie noted as she pried the mango from the sleeping girl's hands.
"Roxie Doxie Poxie!" Tegan called as she skipped up to the loner. "You finded Libby!"
"Was any of that in English?" Roxie clipped.
Tegan then took notice of the mango in Roxie's hand. "Hey, where did you get that? Huh? Huh? Where? Where? Where?"
"The mango tree. Where else?" Roxie lied.
"Where it be?" Tegan inquired.
"Like I'll tell you," Roxie scoffed as she made her way back to the big oak tree.
"Hey! Tell me tell me tell me!" Tegan whined as she pulled on Roxie's shirt.
"Let go of me," Roxie said harshly.
Liberty stirred awake. "What the hell's the ruckus?" she groaned.
"Roxie Doxie has teh mango but she won't tell me where she finded it!" Tegan pouted.
Liberty sat there for a few seconds, connecting the dots in her head when she looked at her empty hands.
"Hey, wait a minute!" Liberty scowled. "That's my mango!"
Roxie shoved Tegan, prying her grip from Roxie's shirt, and ran to the big oak tree.
"You won't get away with this!" Tegan shouted as she gave chase.
Liberty watched the two run off before lying back down and returning to sleep.
Confessional:
Roxie: All's fair in love and Total Drama. If Liberty hadn't fallen asleep mid-challenge, this might not have happened.
Tegan: I will save teh mango from teh evil Roxie Doxie! No one steals from my team and gets away with it!
Jeremy and Rowan returned to the oak tree with a dragonfruit. Rowan placed it in their team's bowl.
"And The Best Team takes first place once again!" Chris announced.
"Yes!" Jeremy cheered.
"I knew you guys could do it," Shadya said with a slight smile.
"We aren't The Best Team for nothing," Rowan smiled.
Louise and Virgil showed up shortly after with a dragonfruit of their own, which Louise promptly placed in their team's bowl.
"Second place goes to the Luscious Lollipops!" Chris announced.
"Thank god," Virgil said with a sigh of relief.
"See, we can win challenges yet!" Louise beamed.
"It's down to Team I Don't Know and the Knights of Goodness," Chris said. "One team will be safe, the other will be voting someone out tonight."
"It won't be the Knights!" Hildegard declared.
"It totally will," Fred grinned. "Team I Don't Know has this in the bag, dawg!"
Roxie ran up to the oak tree, with Tegan hot on her tail.
"Give it back!" Tegan shouted before tackling Roxie to the ground, causing her to drop the mango.
"Gah, get off of me! This challenge is mine to win! Give it up, you child!" Roxie struggled.
Both girls reached for the mango.
"You go, Tegan!" Hildegard cheered.
"Kick her ass, Roxie!" Fred cheered.
The girls struggled against one another, but, ultimately, one of them managed to free herself from the tussle, grab the mango, and run it up to her team's bowl.
"And that's that!" Chris announced. "Taking third place in this challenge..."
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"Team I Don't Know!"
"Yeah!" Fred whooped.
"Which means that the Knights of Goodness will be voting someone out tonight," Chris concluded.
All twenty-three contestants had gathered at the oak tree.
"Alright, now that everyone's back, it's time to hand out rewards," Chris said. "The Best Team, for placing first in the challenge, you get a fishing kit and a hunting kit! Everything you'll need to catch fish and beast to nourish yourselves during your time on the island."
"Not a reward we needed badly, but one we'll gladly accept," Shadya nodded.
"Luscious Lollipops, for placing second, you get your choice of either a fishing kit or a hunting kit," Chris continued.
"It'd make more sense to get the hunting kit, right?" Wisdom asked. "Since our camp has no easy access to saltwater?"
"I agree," Dean nodded.
"And my vote makes three," Louise chimed in. "We'll take the hunting kit," she told Chris.
"Team I Don't Know, you don't get an extra reward, but you can rest easy knowing you're safe tonight."
"Sounds good!" Bunko winked.
"Knights of Goodness, I'll be seeing you guys at the campfire ceremony tonight," Chris chuckled. "Have fun deciding who to cut! Hehaha."
Confessional:
Nestor: I may not have found anything, but we still got first place. I'll take it. Although, this could give off the impression that my team may not need me. I'll have to work extra-hard to prove myself from here on out.
Louise: Whew. After all that happened last night, the last thing I wanted was to go to another vote. And hey, we even got something to help out at camp, too. Things are really looking up!
Elmer: It sounds like things were close. I'm not fully confident that I'd have the numbers going into a vote, so I'm glad we missed out on this one. I still need to get a foothold over here.
Kun: Well that's, um, unfortunate, but perhaps it could be a blessing in disguise. Our team is, um, not getting along tremendously, so perhaps losing someone could, um, benefit us in the long run.
After the campers were dismissed back to their campsites, Kirkland, Liberty, and Rhiannon met up at a spot not far from their camp.
"Honestly, I'm not even mad that we lost," Kirkland said. "And you want to know why?"
"Because you get to vote for Tegan?" Rhiannon guessed.
Kirkland narrowed his eyes at Rhiannon for a moment. "Yes. That technicolor nightmare needs to go now."
"Yeah, I want her gone, too," Liberty drowsily nodded. "She didn't work with me at all in the challenge."
"That's great and all, but do you think Kun would go for it?" Rhiannon asked. "Obviously Tegan and Hildegard won't. We'll need his vote, and I think he's dead set on voting for Hildegard."
"If he does vote Hildegard, then Tegan still goes," Kirkland said. "A 3-2-1 split will favor us just as much as a clean 4-2. Either way, the three of us will hold all the power on this team after tonight's vote. Hell, we basically already have all the power."
"How fortunate," Rhiannon smiled.
"Vote Tegan. Cool. Can I go back to sleep?" Liberty asked.
"You're dismissed," Kirkland nodded.
Liberty trudged off.
"If she were on any other team, she'd be screwed," Rhiannon commented.
"I don't know. The other teams seem to have their share of drama as well," Kirkland mentioned.
Rhiannon glanced at Kirkland.
Confessional:
Kirkland: I will never know what drew Hildegard to want Tegan as an ally, but it's going to prove very detrimental to her game in the long run.
Hildegard and Tegan, meanwhile sat outside their team's cave as Hildegard cooked a wild rabbit.
"Aw, po' widdle wabbit," Tegan sniffled.
"It was not domesticated and would not have made a good pet," Hildegard said.
"Are rabbits tasty?" Tegan asked.
"So I'm told," Hildegard said. "Anyway, how wouldst thou feel about eliminating Kun from this team?"
"I barely know the guy," Tegan said. "So I has no emotional attachment and don't mind seeing him go! Teehee."
"That's what I like to hear," Hildegard nodded. "We will need at least two other people to join us, however. Two votes do not an elimination make."
"How about Libby and Rhi-Rhi?" Tegan suggested. "But NOT Kirkityland! He's a meanie!"
"I fear Liberty may not be so receptive to either of us," Hildegard pondered. "But I believe she considers Rhiannon to be a friend. We should speak to Rhiannon and ask her to spread the idea to Liberty."
"Works for me!" Tegan agreed.
"I will finish dinner preparations and then speak to her," Hildegard said. "Feel free to go play in the meantime."
"Play? I likes teh play!" Tegan acquiesced as she stood up and cartwheeled away.
Confessional:
Hildegard: I may yet speak to Kirkland regardless of how Tegan feels. I know that little Tegan and I are likely targets of Kun's and Kirkland's, respectively, but I shan't let the odds intimidate me! What paladin lies down in the face of adversity! None like Lady Hildegard!
Liberty fell asleep within the cave while Rhiannon sat next to her. Kun entered the cave.
"Oh, just the people I was, um, looking for," Kun smiled.
"Got something special in mind?" Rhiannon purred.
"Um, well, yes, but it's probably not what you're, um, thinking of," Kun blushed. "Kirkland."
"What about Kirkland?" Rhiannon asked.
"I'm considering, um, turning the vote against him," Kun explained.
"Right, you mentioned being wary of him before," Rhiannon recalled. "I'll admit, I'm surprised to see such a power play come from you."
"Well, um, what sort of leader would I be if I didn't take risks?" Kun responded.
"You hear that, Liberty?" Rhiannon asked as she shook Liberty awake.
"Ugh. Whaaaaaaaaat?" Liberty groused.
"Kun here wants to vote for Kirkland," Rhiannon explained.
"Why? That's stupid," Liberty said bluntly. "Vote for Tegan like the rest of us."
"Well, um, I fear that Kirkland may be becoming too, um, powerful too quickly," Kun explained. "He may very well, um, be a threat down the line."
"You're overthinking it," Liberty said as she lay her head back down.
"I'll talk it over with her," Rhiannon told Kun.
"So, um, you're in?" Kun asked hopefully.
"I'll talk it over with her," Rhiannon repeated.
"Well, um, I would appreciate your votes," Kun told Rhiannon as he took his leave.
Confessional:
Rhiannon: I'd be stupid not to notice that Kirkland is slipping through the cracks and taking advantage of the conflict on our team. He trusts me, so he's told me, but I also get the feeling that he'd be willing to drop me if it benefited him. It's something to think about, it really is.
As Kun left the cave, he found Hildegard tending to the rabbit, and Tegan cartwheeling in circles. He cleared his throat.
"Um, I would like to speak with the both of you," Kun began.
"Here to concede defeat?" Hildegard asked.
"Bwahaha! Good one, Hilde!" Tegan laughed.
"No, I'm not," Kun huffed. "I'm, um, here to let you in on something you may want to hear."
"What could it possibly be?" Hildegard asked dismissively.
"I wish to, um, blindside Kirkland," Kun explained.
"Vote out Kirkityland?!" Tegan gasped. She dashed up to the two aspiring team leaders. "I'm in!"
"Soft, little Tegan!" Hildegard warned. She turned to Kun. "How are we to trust you? You are no secret rival to the two of us!"
"It's true. Y-You can ask the other girls," Kun stammered. He cleared his throat again. "I think Kirkland is planning on taking power for himself. He plans on voting out Tegan and then leaving you and me against each other, so he, Rhiannon, and Liberty can have all the say."
"Voting for Tegan does sound like something Kirkland would do," Hildegard conceded.
"Yeah, 'cuz he's a butt!" Tegan added.
"And he does seem to confer with those two often..." Hildegard conceded.
"Really, um, I'd have nothing to gain by lying to you," Kun said. "If I was voting for Tegan with them, why would I, um, tell you?"
"And what about those girls?" Hildegard asked. "One of them would have to join us in this vote."
"I spoke to them," Kun said. "Liberty wasn't keen, but, um, I think Rhiannon is thinking about it.
"I say we should do it!" Tegan told Hildegard.
Hildegard looked pensive.
Confessional:
Kun: I think that, no matter what happens, I should be, um, safe, and, um, might even have people who listen to me. We'll see what, um, happens. Fingers crossed.
Night had fallen, and Hildegard, Kirkland, Kun, Liberty, Rhiannon, and Tegan all met up with Chris at the campfire pit where the campers first met up at the start of the game. Torches surrounding the area were lit, as was the campfire itself.
"Good morrow to thee, Knights of Goodness," Chris chuckled.
"Art thou mocking me?!" Hildegard accused.
"Rhiannon, now that you've had some time to settle in, how are things at camp?" Chris asked. "Is everyone getting along?"
"No team will ever get along perfectly," Rhiannon answered. "That's just not how the game works. The possibility of having to vote is always present, and people are always preparing themselves. And, of course, people will disagree on who needs to go and who needs to stay. And, sadly, having anger sex to resolve tension is not on the table. I checked."
"Can you go one day without trying to screw someone?" Liberty asked.
"Ah, Liberty, wide awake, I see," Chris chuckled.
"Yeah, I'm normally awake at around this time," Liberty clarified.
"But not at the time when the challenge happened, apparently," Chris mentioned.
"Look, I tried to stay up. I always do for challenges," Liberty defended. "But imagine waking up at 4 am and being expected to do some strenuous task. That's basically what happened to me."
"Kun, does this make Liberty a target?" Chris asked. "Why keep someone who won't stay awake in challenges, right?"
"One would, um, think, but it's as Rhiannon said: people have been planning this vote since long before Liberty's, um, blunder at the challenge," Kun explained.
"Hildegard, what might factor into someone's plans to vote so early in the game?" Chris inquired.
"One's social game can be downright damning," Hildegard answered. "Sometimes, people are liable to butt heads, and those who do may scheme to eliminate their rival from the game."
"Yeah! Like Kirkityland!" Tegan accused.
"Kirkland, Tegan just threw you under the bus," Chris pointed out.
"Tch. I'd be a hypocrite to get mad after I've spent pretty much the entirety of my time since I first set foot on that dock throwing her under the bus," Kirkland scoffed. "I've made it no secret that I cannot stand Tegan and want to get rid of her as soon as possible."
"What did I ever do to you?!" Tegan cried. "I just wanted to be your friend because I thought you were funny! But you're just so mean!"
"I never asked to be your friend!" Kirkland snapped. "I find your mannerisms juvenile and obnoxious. The fact that you seem to think it's all cute makes it all even worse. Because it isn't cute, you blithering puzzle piece! Nobody here thinks it is, except maybe Hildegard, who doesn't know better because she's also dedicated herself to some annoying shtick! It's like fate went out of its way to put me on the same team as the two most annoying people in this game! But, as fate would have it, terrible minds think alike, and the two of them made the mistake of working together. This will make it easy to get rid of Hildegard after Tegan is voted out tonight."
Silence.
"Quite some choice words from Kirkland, there," Chris laughed. "Tegan, any rebuttals?"
"Well, I think KIRKLAND is a rebuttal!" Tegan cried. "And I'm ready to vote HIM out!"
"Well, with all that said, I'd say now's as good a time as any to vote," Chris grinned. "Hildegard, you're up first. Head to the confessional booth."
Hildegard nodded as she stood up and did as she was told.
After all six contestants had voted, Chris returned with a platter of five marshmallows.
"You have cast your votes and made your decisions," Chris smiled ominously. "One by one, I will call your names and toss you marshmallows. If you receive a marshmallow, you are safe. One of you will not receive a marshmallow. That person will be eliminated from Total Drama Shuffle Party."
Kirkland and Tegan glared at each other.
"First up is Liberty," Chris said as he tossed the first marshmallow.
Liberty grinned as she caught the marshmallow.
"Rhiannon."
"Hildegard."
"Kun."
The three smiled as they caught their own marshmallows
"You're going down, Tegan," Kirkland grinned darkly.
"Not if you go down first!" Tegan insisted.
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"The final marshmallow goes to Kirkland," Chris finally announced.
"W-WAT?!" Tegan gasped. "You guys, you..."
"Ha! Haha! Gyahaha *snort* Haha *snort* Haha!" Kirkland burst into laughter. "Get fucked, infantile girl."
"I can't believe this!" Tegan sobbed. "How could you guys side with a bully over me?!"
"Little Tegan!" Hildegard called. She stood up and gave her friend a tight hug. "Worry not, faithful squire. I will see to it that these four get their just desserts."
"No, don't do that," Tegan sniveled. "They don't deserve desserts."
Hildegard smiled. "Never change."
"Tegan, you have been eliminated from the game," Chris smiled. "If you'll make your way to the new Dock of Shame and the new Boat of Losers..."
"If you need me, I'll be at the dark side. We have cookies!" Tegan taunted as she made her way over to the Dock of Shame. She boarded the boat of losers, and the vessel drove away.
"Sometimes, emotions overtake logic in voting ceremonies," Chris told the five remaining Knights of Goodness. "But how viable is that really? Head back to camp. We're done here tonight."
Confessional:
Hildegard: I have failed as a paladin and as a friend! But I will not let this bullying go unpunished! Kirkland, if thou thinkest me annoying now, thou hast seen naught!
Chris stood on the Dock of Shame after the Knights of Goodness had left and looked at the camera.
"Man, I knew that team was going to deliver in the drama. Hehaha," Chris grinned. "Will Kirkland continue to gain power over his team? Which of his teammates will Mark stay loyal to? Will Gretchen become the protagonist she says she is? Will Rowan keep driving wedges between her teammates? The answers to these questions and more, may or may not be answered, next time, on Total! Drama! Sh-Sh-Sh-SHUFFLE PARTY!"
Votes:
Liberty: Yeah, I'm voting for Tegan. Useless and annoying? Come on.
Hildegard: Kirkland, I was apprehensive about voting for you at first, but thou hast given me every reason to do so! Good riddance to thee!
Tegan: Kirkland Kirkland Kirkland Kirkland Kirkland Kirkland Kirkland Kirkland Kir-
Kirkland: Tegan, this is a round overdue, but it gives me such great pleasure to say your name for the final time. Now please exit my life forever.
Rhiannon: Ugh, after that outburst, I actually kind of want to vote for Kirkland now. But if I do, and Kun doesn't, that could gaslight even more drama that none of us really need. I really hate to do it, but, sorry, I vote for Tegan.
Kun: Well, um, I think Kirkland proved that I have nothing to worry about with him. After that, um, speech he gave, I don't think anyone's clamoring to listen to him. So, to stick with the old plan of weakening Hildegard, I, um, vote for Tegan.
A/N: And Tegan, unlike Jim, was a character who was always going to be a very early boot. I think the farthest she ever went was the third boot, maybe fourth, but she was always going to go home in the early game after a couple episodes of being over-the-top and quirky enough to annoy everyone.
Then again, while plenty of readers couldn't stand her, plenty of readers actually really liked her, which I did not see coming, but I certainly won't complain about. I like to think I'm past what I did in Explore Party and make characters annoying solely so they won't be missed after going early, but Tegan may or may not be an exception to that. I wrote her to be annoying, but the kind of annoying that someone could feasibly find charming or funny or otherwise entertaining if they were so inclined, and some were. That said, her shtick did get tiring for me to write very quickly, and, as such, I think now is the best time to get rid of her. To her fans, I'm sorry, and to her haters, you're welcome.
And since I've been asked about it, the list of contestants with their labels and such at the end of each episode a la Virtual Party will return on the second island.