I woke up before I actually opened my eyes. Whenever I did that, I usually would just lay in my bed and savor the moment, where everything was silent and all was perfect. But I wasn't in my bed, and my head was killing me. I woke up from a headache, not because it was morning.

I groaned and rolled over, shifting awkwardly on Shannon's couch. It was the place I'd slept since Friday, after two glorious nights of heavy drinking, but the uncomfortable position I was forced to lay in was what had started the pounding behind my eyes.

Besides the entire bottle of Goose I'd drank last night.

I hesitantly opened my eyes, squinting in the morning light. The shades were drawn and the room was really warm, almost uncomfortably so. I wondered if Shannon's air-conditioner broke or if he'd just forgotten to turn it on.

I sat up and struggled to bring my feet up, stretching tense muscles in my thighs and lower back. My mouth felt like dry straw and tasted like bad cigarettes. It wasn't a pleasant thing to wake up to.

I looked over at the other couch, blinking weakly at Jeff. "Hey," I rasped, then cleared my throat. It didn't even sound like my voice. "Jeff. You awake?"

He was wearing his sunglasses, but they were sliding down his nose, and his eyes were closed. His arms were crossed over his chest. He heaved a sigh. "Yes."

I nodded, standing up, wobbling on my feet. "Good. I'm gonna... " I swallowed the dry lump in my throat. "I'm gonna go, uh... say... say good-bye to Shannon, then we can leave."

Jeff sat up easily, pushing his sunglasses into place. I saw his eyes open from the side. "Okay. Jill's already at home. She left last night."

"She did?"

"You wouldn't have remembered."

"Oh." I coughed, surprised I could actually have moisture in my mouth. I knocked into the coffee table loudly, bumping against the arm rest for support.

"You all right?" Jeff asked flatly.

I nodded, stupidly forgetting. "Yeah, I'm fine. I'll be right back."

"I'm not goin' anywhere," he said quietly.

I sighed and headed to Shannon's room. I went past it a couple of times, but the snoring was a dead giveaway. I went back and opened the door as quietly as I could, shoving past the clothes on the floor.

The window right above his bed was closed but the shades were up, casting a bright white into the room, directly on top of him. I couldn't understand how he could sleep like that.

I cleared my throat. "Sha - " I hesitated, lowering my voice an octave. "Shannon," I whispered.

He shifted in his sleep.

"Shannon," I hissed, a little louder.

He grunted and twisted his upper half up awkwardly, arm thrown around Kyle, who was still sound asleep. He was on his side, and he turned his head, squinting at me sleepily. "What?" he whispered back.

"I'm... I'm gonna head out." I wondered if I was still a little drunk. I kept stumbling over my words.

Shannon raised his eyebrow. "You sure you're up for it?"

"Yeah. If I'm not, Jeff can drive."

He narrowed his eyes. "Jeff's blind, man."

I rubbed a hand over my face. "Maybe I'm not good to go... "

"Hold on," Shannon said tiredly, shifting away from Kyle. He fell off the bed and searched the floor for jeans, tugging some on roughly when he got up.

I blinked at him, watching. "I think those are Kyle's, brother."

Shannon looked down, the button and fly open. "Ah shit, I think they are."

I held up my hand. "Don't worry about it, man, I'll just... sleep it off for a couple more hours."

"No, no, I can take you - "

"Nah, just go back to bed. I'll... make some coffee. Or somethin'."

Shannon kicked the pants off, leaning his hands against the bed, poised to get in. "You sure?"

I nodded. "Yeah. I can wait 'til you're ready. No problem."

He shrugged, collapsing against Kyle's back, on the covers, his head buried against the nape of her neck. "I'll get up in a couple of hours," he said on a yawn. "Then we can get somethin' to eat... And then I'll take you home."

"Sounds like a plan, brother." I started closing the door. "Night, man."

Shannon made a small noise of acknowledgment before it shut. I licked my lips and headed back downstairs, into his kitchen that was warm from the light coming in through the windows. I tried to be as quiet as possible, opening and closing cupboards, setting up the coffee machine. I leaned against the glass and watched the pool ripple in the early morning sun.

"Hey, Matt?" Jeff called from the other room.

I sighed and turned, jumping when I saw him in the doorway. "Yeah?"

Jeff scratched at his bare chest. "Can you turn on the air-conditioner?"

"Oh. Sure." I went to the dial and flipped the switch, waiting to hear the buzz. I nodded when it sounded. "There you go, man."

"Thanks." Jeff sniffed the air. "Is there coffee? I can smell it."

"Yeah. You want some?"

"It'd be nice."

"Okay. I'll bring it to you."

Jeff nodded and turned, thumping into the door frame. He frowned and felt his way back into the other room.

I poured two cups, glancing back at the water outside. It looked so nice, I wanted to jump in. Maybe I would - it'd be a nice wake up, and it'd kill some time before Shannon came down.

"Jeff, you want to go swimmin'?" I asked, coming into the room. The television was on - he liked to listen to it. "The water's lookin' mighty fine."

"Oh, is it? That's nice," he said bitterly. He took the mug from my hand when I nudged his shoulder.

"Well, just 'cause you can't see it doesn't mean you can't feel it. And believe me, it looks like it'd feel nice."

He frowned. "I'll probably drown."

"But wouldn't you - "

"I don't want to fuckin' swim, okay?" He sat back and gripped his coffee tightly, his teeth set. "I don't want to fuckin' swim," he said softly.

I looked away awkwardly. "Okay, man. You don't have to. It was just a suggestion."

Jeff lifted his foot, like he was going to brace it against the coffee table, but he missed it, thumping against the floor. He blushed and tried again, awkwardly feeling his way until he found the edge. "You know, man... I hate wakin' up this early."

"Why? You want to sleep more?"

"No." Jeff sipped his coffee, grimacing. "This tastes like shit."

"Blame Shannon, not me. It's the brand, I swear."

"Whatever." He sighed. "I hate wakin' up this early because I know the sun is shinin'. I just can't see it."

"Well, man, the sun shines all the time."

"But not like in the morning." Jeff smiled dreamily, like he could picture it. "The way is catches every drop of rain or moisture on the blades of grass. How it filters down through the trees, warming everythin' it touches. I miss seein' it."

I stayed silent, waiting for more.

"You know," he started again, tapping his chipped nails against the ceramic mug, "before I was blind, and whenever I was home, I'd wake Jill up 'round... five, five-thirty. Get her up and make her watch the sunrise with me."

I smiled. "Really? I never knew that."

"Yeah," he said bashfully, looking down, even though he couldn't see. "She complained the first few times, but after that... she couldn't wait 'til I got home. Sometimes, if I came home late, she'd wait up for me, and then we'd just stay awake 'til the sun came up."

"Wow. That's real romantic, man."

"I know," he said, almost cockily. He smiled at himself. "I mean, it sounds dumb now, but - "

"No, it doesn't."

Jeff shrugged, the light on his face gone. "It doesn't matter much anymore."

I sighed, silent.

"Matt, do you know if... " Jeff laughed it off, shaking his head. "Never mind. It's stupid."

"No, no, what?"

He swallowed loudly. "Do you know if... I mean, has Jill ever... said anythin' to you? About me bein' blind?"

"Well... yeah. But in what way?"

He shrugged. "I don't know. Does she still love me?"

"Of course," I said immediately, barely waiting for him to finish his sentence. "Don't talk stupid."

"I'm not, I'm just... I feel like I'm trappin' her, you know? She can find - should find someone who can wake up in the morning and gaze into her eyes and tell her she's beautiful. I can't do that, man. And it's not fair to her."

"Jeff, stop talkin' like that. You know damn well that Jill loves you with everythin' she's got. She wouldn't be able to function if she didn't have you by her side."

"Yeah, but - "

"But nothin'. Listen. This is how the universe works. There are two people out there who are perfect for each other - who fit each other's mold, you know? People who have connections and the ability to tell what the other person is feelin' just by lookin' in their eyes. You and Jill have that, and once it's there, there's nothin' that can replace it."

Jeff tried to smile, but it came out as a frown. "How can she tell what I'm feelin' when my eyes are dead?"

"It doesn't matter. You two are for each other. If either of you decided to be with other people, it wouldn't be the same. It'd be awkward, for all of us. You guys together, it warms the room. Everyone brightens when they see you two. Hell, even Shannon and Kyle don't do that. They're perfect for each other, but they can't liven up a quiet room just by steppin' in. You two can. And you always will, you understand?"

"Yeah." He ran a hand over his hair. "I still feel it. I'm not gon' lie."

I smiled. "You see? Don't talk stupid when you know it's not true."

Jeff laughed, then looked up, eyes hidden by sunglasses. He was facing me, though. "Thanks, Matt. Really."

I got up and fell onto the couch next to him, throwing my arm around his shoulders. "You're my little brother, man. I'm always here to cheer you up."

Jeff grinned and looked down.

I punched his side. "Or make you feel worse. But I think I did the right thing today."

He snorted, shaking his head. "Oh, that's nice. Punch the blind guy."

"I'm not punchin' the blind guy, I'm punchin' my brother."

"Who's blind."

I ruffled his head. "For now."

"Forever," Jeff said sadly.

"For now." I smiled at him, even though he couldn't see me.

"Watch it, guys."

I looked back, seeing Shannon in the doorway, shirtless and in white track pants. "What?"

He came into the room, shuffling tiredly. "You don't want anyone to see you - it'll just be another push for sick preteens to think you guys are more than just brothers."

Jeff and I frowned simultaneously.

Shannon collapsed onto the couch I was on earlier, lacing his hands between his knees. He grinned. "Then they'll write about you two fuckin'. And then I'll probably join in. Because, you know, I'm always the third wheel with you guys, even in fantasy."

Jeff and I pushed at each other, sending ourselves to opposite ends of the couch. A chill ran down my spine. "Man, shut up. That is some queer ass shit."

Shannon wagged his finger. "No, no - that's inappropriate."

"And talkin' about me askin' Matt to fuck me isn't?" Jeff's tongue flopped out of his mouth, disgusted. "Blegh."

"How do you know so much about this?" I asked Shannon, suspicious.

"Go type in your name into Google. Fifty bucks the first thing that pops up is a dirty story."

"I'd rather not. The last thing I need to read is some thirteen year old's twisted fantasy about me bangin' my brother."

"Hardycest," Shannon said with a grin.

Jeff and I groaned in digust.

"Hey, you should read some of the stuff they write about Jeff and John Cena."

"What!?" Jeff sat up, knocking his empty cup over. "You're shittin' me."

Shannon laughed, thumping back against the couch. "Yeah. Or you and Edge, Matt. That's a fun one."

"Well, what about you, asshole?" I grimaced. Being hungover and listening about this wasn't doing my stomach any good. "What do they write about you?"

"Me?" Shannon frowned, thoughtful. "Mostly me and Jeff. Oh, and Kelly Kelly. I practically throw up for those. There are some pretty perverted people out there."

"This is worse than perverted," Jeff said disdainfully.

"It's downright twisted," I added.

Shannon sat silently, thinking. "I think I fucked Batista once."

Feet squeaked on the floor behind us, and we all turned, meeting Kyle's wide-eyed gaze. She was just standing there in one of Shannon's shirt, with a half-eaten bagel in her hand. The look on her face was priceless.

I started laughing my ass off.

Kyle swallowed the bite she had been chewing. "Uh, honey? Would you care to repeat that?"

Shannon laughed nervously. "Repeat what?"

She watched him as she ripped another piece off. "Uh, I think you said, and correct me if I'm wrong... " She looked up at the ceiling, pensive, smacking her lips together. "'I think I fucked Batista once.'"

I laughed at her fake accent, the way her eyes were clouded with confusion.

Shannon shook his head. "Oh, no. It's... Baby, it's just in a story."

"Uh huh." She looked down and bit into her food again. "Did you write it?"

"No! What kind of... fuckin' weirdo do you think I am?"

Kyle blinked. "Do you want me to answer that," she said monotonously.

"Kyle! It's just shit that kids write about us." He stood up and went over to her, pulling her body against his.

She gazed at him. "So you never fucked Batista?"

"NO!"

She shrugged. "Good. Because if you did, we wouldn't be getting married."

Shannon grinned. "Because I cheated on you with a guy?"

Kyle looked at him like he was insane. "No."

Shannon furrowed his brow. "What? Why, then?"

"Because it's Batista."

A/N: I just thought for a more serious chapter that the end should go out with some comic relief. :) It was also an attack against those stories - and Batista, obviously. But I'm sorry to anyone who likes them, reads them or writes them. Hardycest creeps the shit out of me, and I'm sure Matt, Jeff and Shannon feel the same way. Review if you please.