Chapter 4

Bright sunlight filled my bedroom, piercing my eyes causing me to close them tighter, groaning as a pain throbbed in my temples. I flipped over on my stomach and inched myself to the edge of the bed, feeling disorientated as my feet touched the floor and I stumbled into the bathroom and lost whatever was in my stomach as I clutched the cold porcelain. This was horrible, my entire body ached.

After my stomach settled I reached out and turned the nozzle to start the shower. It wasn't until I was halfway through rinsing the soap out of my eyes when I was floored with the memories of the previous night and I stood still letting the water spray on and on. I quickly reached out, shut off the water and stepped out onto the cold tiled floor, letting the water puddle under me. I searched for a towel wrapping it around my middle cautiously moving to the door to peak into my room.

Dean was sprawled out on his stomach, a pillow bunched under his head gripped by his hands. He had one leg hiked slightly up, the sheets pulled haphazardly up to his lower back. I couldn't believe it, it really did happen, it wasn't just a vivid dream and a giddy feeling spread through my stomach. Drying off I quickly grabbed some jeans from the dresser, dressed and left my room, closing the door silently behind me, trying not to wake Dean.

Would he remember? I knew I didn't remember everything, there seemed to be gaps when I tried to remember every detail, but my thoughts betrayed me. Like sand pilling out between my fingers. I could remember the big picture, but small memories would be lost as I tried to capture something specific. Was Dean really okay with what happened? At the time, I seemed to remember him wanting me as much as I wanted him.

Quietly I made my way to the kitchen where I slumped onto the counter feeling a huge dose of satisfaction, when guild and worry suddenly crashed into the pit of my stomach making me encircle my head with my arms, enclosing my vision in darkness, trying to dive deeper into my own subconscious willing myself to pluck the memory of Dean giving the okay. Not that I don't doubt he gave it, but under the influence of liquor it may have been a different answer compared to the rational thoughts of a sober mind.

From what my hungover mind could remember Dean was just as ready as I was, and even though I was drunk too, I felt like I was the one to take advantage of him. One night stands wasn't my style, so when I was with someone it was because we worked up to it in a relationship. Did everyone else who had ever taken part in a one night stand feel like this? No. It was because I was in love with him. This wasn't just an attraction and a means to an end. I held deep feelings for Dean and I didn't want to hurt him, or worse, wreck what we did have. I honestly never thought us being together would actually happen, but I still had him as my best friend and I wanted more, but I was okay with just being friends because that's what he wanted and I would do anything for Dean, even if that included ripping my heart open again and again being…just friends.

Suddenly arms closed around my waist, making me jump. I hadn't even heard Dean come out of my room, I was too busy arguing with myself to pay attention to anything else. Letting my arms drop from my head I straightened up, my nerves making my stomach turn over again. It was obviously a good sign that he had his arms wrapped around me, but the butterflies still fluttered in my stomach. My back was pressed gently against Dean's chest and his arms tightened their hold on me.

Dean had pressed his cheek against the back of my head and I just stood there enjoying the moment of his embrace, making my heart beat even faster, partially from him holding me so close and part of me knowing we would have to talk about what happened the mere hours ago. My nerves were so shot, and I was very hung over. I just want to shut out all my problems.

Taking a deep breath I tried to give myself courage to say the things I needed to say. "I am very hungover Dean." I managed to finally get out, and my eyes slid closed, hatred for myself running deep. That is not what I wanted to say. Dean however let out a quick soft laugh that ruffled my hair slightly.

"That's because you rarely get drunk, so you don't have an immunity to it like I do." He replied softly. Was that him telling me he remembers what happened completely yesterday?

"Cas, I know what's going through your head. I can feel you heart beating a mile a minute. You caught me by surprise last night, but it's not like the thought hasn't crossed my mind a time or two." Dean admitted.

This declaration shocked me. My eyes flew open and I turned around in his arms. "What?" I uttered. I could see a slight smile spread across his lips and he gently placed his forehead against mine.

"Look, I don't want to turn this into a big deal or anything, but I gotta know. Where did you get those sheets? I've never slept on anything so soft before." Dean joked and I couldn't help it, I laughed. He made it clear he was okay with this and didn't need any type of explanation. I felt like I was being let off the hook. Tilting my face up I placed a soft kiss on his lips wrapping my arms around his bare back.

Pulling back, Dean clapped his hands together. "Okay first things first, let's get some coffee in you, trust me, it helps." Dean said as I gave a noise of disgust. My stomach lurched at the thought of eating or drinking anything. Dean grabbed my shoulders and led me to a chair where he pushed me down and started making a pot of coffee.

For the first time I got a glance at him. He was barefooted and wearing his jeans from last night. They were slung low on his hips and he was bare chested, like me. I had to admit seeing him like that turned me on, but the pounding in my head kept distracting me. As he moved around my kitchen I noticed there were several bruises on his back, hips and chest. They weren't huge spots, and another memory came flooding back to me and I could see myself gripping him tightly, pulling and pushing his hips hard against mine.

While he waited for the coffee to start he leaned against the counter, crossed his arms and looked at me quizzically and followed my gaze down to his hips and saw the dark marks that were left from my fingertips. "You know, I don't think I've ever seen you so demanding before."

Heat immediately rushed to my face. He was right, I am not typically a dominating person, and I am as surprised as Dean was by my actions. Dean pushed off the counter and crouched in front of me placing his hand on my shoulder he gave me a smile.

"Don't be embarrassed, and I gotta know, when did you get the tattoo?"

I had completely forgotten about it. That was a huge mistake. "Oh, uh, Trevor thought me getting a tattoo was cool, but after I got them he hated it." I muttered hating the wings on my back. Trevor was an old boyfriend and he bought them. It took several sessions to get it applied. From my shoulder blades down to my lower back were two black angel wings. Trevor thought the idea would be awesome, but didn't like it once finished.

"I think it's hot. I like it." His grin turned sheepish. I felt relieved, not only about last night but about the tattoo. Trevor had made me feel so self-conscience that I almost had it removed, but I couldn't afford it.

Not that Dean ever went into great detail about his sex life with me, to which I was thankful I wasn't sure how I could have listened to that, but I had imagined he would be the demanding one, why was our rolls seemed switched?

Dean got up and grabbed a mug out of the cabinet pouring a full cup and placed it in front of me. "Now if I make toast, would you eat it?" I shook my head no, so he shrugged his shoulders and grabbed some Excedrin and dropped them on the table. "Take those, and drink. I'm gonna take a shower." Dean said as he made his way towards the bathroom. After he was gone I laid my cheek against the cool wood of the table watching the steam rise out of the cup. More and more moments came back to me. I grabbed the pills and swallowed them with my coffee. Dean was right, having something on my stomach did help so I made my way to the toaster and dropped a slice of bread in. I could hear Dean singing in the shower while I waited for my toast.

My cell started to buzz and I picked it up, it was a text from Sam.

I've been trying to get ahold of Dean, if he's with you have him call me, or pick up his phone…it's important.

I had five missed calls from last night, but before I got a chance to see who from my toast popped up and I put it in my pocket, I would deal with that later. Carrying my breakfast in hand I walked into my room, wincing as sunlight pierced my eyes once more, with a groan I turned away from the murderous light and grabbed a shirt and a pair of Dean's jeans from the dresser and I heard the water shut off. Moments later he emerged from the bathroom, fog billowing out after him with a towel wrapped around his waist.

Just at the very sight of him I started to get an erection, but my stomach had barely begun to settle, so instead I tossed him his clothes.

"Good thing you had some of my clothes on hand." He said, then a huge smile broke out onto his face, "is that why you always kept my clothes around?"

Taking the last bite of toast, I replied, "no, you're too lazy to pick them up when you've crashed at my place before, your just lucky I clean up after you."

Dean walked up to me, pushing me towards the bed covering his mouth with mine. My earlier concern about my stomach vanished as his mouth devoured mine.

He pushed me back down onto the bed where he climbed on top of me, our lips melding together again. My hand found his and we linked our fingers together and I pulled his arm out, leaving his whole weight pressed down on mine, a moan escaping his mouth. He pulled his lips from mine and made a trail of icy fire down to my neck when I shivered in delight, my breath becoming ragged.

Very slowly he inched his way down to my chest when my phone started to vibrate in my pocket. With a groan I pulled it out of my pocket and started to toss it across the room when I saw who was calling.

"Not that I want to ruin the moment, but why is Lisa calling me?" I asked Dean who looked just as confused as I did. "Dunno, she's been calling me all day yesterday but I never answered."

"Hello?" I answered and heard her let out a sigh of relief when I picked up. "Castiel, is Dean with you?" She asked her voice sounded worried. I looked at Dean and he nodded his head, "uh, yeah, hang one a sec." I replied and handed Dean the phone.

"Uhh, hello?...No, we were out celebrating Cas' new place why?...No Lisa, we don't it's over why the urgency all of a sudden after weeks of silence, we tried to make it work and we couldn't, just leave it be….wait….what?...Say that again…fuck! Are you serious? Don't play games with me Lisa…no I can't right now…because I'm…busy." Dean's eyes flinted up to mine, then quickly moved away. "I can't deal with this right now, I gotta go."

With a shaky voice Dean turned to me and said, "Lisa's pregnant."

X-X

So a cliffhanger! Let me know what you guys thought of the chapter. Thanks for the people who reviewed last chapter, I wrote back but I'm not sure if they went through since the PM things is messed up on my end, I always love to hear where you think the story is going. Right now I'm writting chapter 11, and have so many ideas for the story I can't wait to post them all!

Desiree'