Chapter 4 - Lost Scene
Somewhere in between falling in love and social suicide lies one Ciel Phantomhive. No one important will ever notice him because he is quiet and smart. Everyone important will notice him, because he has everything to hide.
He is beautiful for a fourteen-year-old boy, but underneath his skin lie demons, horrible creatures that humans cannot name. Underneath the tiny black eyepatch that sits on his little face, lies scar after scar, after scar.
Ciel Phantomhive is a lost boy, never to be found. But Alois Trancy finds him, sitting alone in an empty classroom, staring into nothingness but with a look on his face that speaks volumes as to what is on his mind. Alois knows this look, because this look is the look that has been on his face too, at night and in corners of rooms and lonely and cold, heart racing but too afraid, always too afraid, until now.
Alois swore to be brave, so he decides that Ciel Phantomhive will be his very first friend.
This is more difficult than Alois initially thinks. While he may understand Ciel's situation, he does not, however, understand Ciel. The boy is reckless - the embodiment of chaos, yet his every move is perfectly calculated to match his cold façade. Ciel Phantomhive is too well-thought out, a perfect contrast to Alois - whose thoughts and actions never match, and whose life is never lived after contemplating beforehand. Alois does, he does not think about doing, and he has learned that thinking too hard doesn't get you anywhere anyway. Somehow, he decides, he will show Ciel Phantomhive what it really means to live in the moment.
Very quickly they are in some friend-enemy-brother relationship in which they are each other's emotional rock. Ciel is no longer lost, and Alois counts himself lucky to have found someone at all. And one day they hold hands, and admit to each other that they are both looking for something else
-not from each other, they are quick to add-
and perhaps it's impossible but maybe they can find it in each other for now. What that something is, neither of them know. Is it love? Companionship? Or merely unequivocal devotion, Alois wonders and grins, because he knows Ciel is asking himself the same question.
They have both experienced the same pain, Alois thinks - and in a way, it makes them the same, Alois Trancy and Ciel Phantomhive. Two little lost boys; they are paradoxical and proper, beautiful and obscene. They are two halves of one whole, destined for two different paths, and yet drawn to one another all the same. They are chaos and serenity; they are dark and darker.
They may both still be lost to the world, but they are lost together.