So, I suck. I'm so sorry that I've taken a year to update this. I want to update more. I just completely lost interest. If your would comment, that would definitely help spur me on.
~Doctor~
Just as I was getting ready to flip the lever that would take me back to the Rose I once knew, I heard a soft strain of notes drifting from one of the corridors. I followed the sound to the music room.
I cracked the door open. There, I found Rose, sitting at the grand piano, her hands drifting above the keys lightly, creating the tune. It unfurled itself from the light tinkling of notes I heard before, to a hauntingly beautiful melody. Then, she began singing:
We know full well there's just time
So is it wrong to dance this line?
If your heart was full of love
Could you give it up?
I stayed just outside the door, leaving it cracked. Her voice was beautiful. It was as if she was not merely playing the song, but it was being tugged out of her heart through her fingers.
'Cause what about, what about angels?
They will come, they will go, make us special
Don't give me up
Don't give...
Me up
She began playing harder, her fingers digging into the keys, back hunched.
How unfair, it's just our luck
Found something real that's out of touch
But if you'd searched the whole wide world
Would you dare to let it go?
'Cause what about, what about angels?
They will come, they will go, make us special
Don't give me up
Don't give...
Me up
'Cause what about, what about angels?
They will come, they will go, make us special
It's not about, not about angels, angels
The ballad came to an end. I slowly backed away from the door, closing it softly. I turned on my heel and walked briskly towards the console room. My resolve was stronger now. It took me longer to get to the console room than it did to get to the music room before. The TARDIS had moved it farther away.
When I finally got to my destination, Rose was already there.
"I know what you're planning to do," she murmured, "and I won't let you."
I blinked. TARDIS, you traitor. She sent back an annoyed buzz.
"You can't erase everything you don't want to deal with. You can't change my past. It happened. And now we deal with it," she looked up from her fingers, which had been trailing on the console controls.
"I-" I paused. What should I say? "I'm sorry."
"Yeah."
We were both quiet. There was so much to say, yet nothing at all.
"I'm going back to my room," she finally said.
"Alright."
~Rose~
I was disappointed and angry. Disappointed because I didn't think the Doctor would do something like this. I knew he was upset, but this? This was deplorable. Angry because, well... that was obvious.
I walked to my room, caught up in my thoughts. I didn't know what to do from here. He could barely look at me with the guilt he was feeling, and I wasn't all that happy with him, either. I was glad to be back- so, so glad, but if things were to continue the way they have been, I couldn't handle it.
But still, I couldn't leave. That would be even worse. A horrible thought crossed my mind- What if he wanted me to leave? What if he couldn't even stand to look at me, dirty and tainted as I now was? My breaths were short now. What if he hated me? He had wanted it to change. What if now, that he couldn't change me back to the way I used to be, he wouldn't want me anymore? I was weak. I should have tried harder to keep those things from happening to me.
These thoughts ran through my mind in a matter of seconds that felt like hours, and I had found my way to my room, eyes burning with unshed tears. They were so close to spilling over, a twitch of my eye would send them tumbling down. I blinked, and two fat drops ran down my cheeks. Sniffing, I rubbed my cheeks and dried my eyes. No, I thought. I would not cry.
He had heard me sing. I hadn't intended him to. It was a song I had written a long time ago, when I first met the Doctor, and realized I l- no. I shook my head. I wasn't sure it was true anymore. I wasn't sure the feelings I had had for the Doctor were there anymore. I was stuck there, in Hell, for two hundred days. I don't know why I was so averse to him changing it. Perhaps it was the feeling that my suffering would have been for nothing. I wouldn't be me anymore. I would still be the stupid little girl who trusted the Doctor implicitly and without question. She knew now, though. She could trust no one in that way; not even herself.