The Humming Surgeon of Konohagakure

by yurei king

A random discovery leads to Naruto gaining terrifying power, a new set of particular skills and various new allies. Join our lovable knucklehead on his journey to fame, infamy, action and a dash of comedy all while keeping track of a classy straw hat and humming our favorite pirate tune.

4. Chapter 4

Greetings and Salutations readers! I apologize profusely for the delay in this, but I just had so much trouble getting the right feel for things I had going on in this chapter. Fair warning, there is a bit of an exposition dump going on in this chapter, but I hope you still like the bit of action I've got going on here.

Naruto is going to get a bit dark so brace for that.

Anyway, I'll address some stuff in the bottom AN so let's not keep you waiting any longer. ON WITH THE CHAPTER!

XXXXX

"I'm glad to see everyone made it here without issue," Hiruzen stood at the long table at the far end of the room. To his right stood a man dressed in robes similar to his own save for the fact that where his own bore marks of red his were a dark green. At the front tip the symbol it bore was that of the kanji for "Wind" as was befitting the man holding the title of Kazekage. To his left stood Jiraiya, arms crossed and feet shoulder width apart as he grinned broadly at the room's occupants.

Stretching out from the raised area the head table was placed upon was a single table set with fine tableware. On each side of that table stood the finalists for the Chunin Exams. They were joined by the members of their teams and all looked to their host whilst standing at attention and awaiting his next words. Fortunately, the man was not one to keep his audience waiting unless necessary, so he clapped his hands. "In a few hours' time, those among you that have earned their places in the exams shall face each other in the arena. But that time has not come just yet. For now, the only thing you need to think about is the meal we are about to share. Talk amongst yourselves, for you never know what you might learn." He clapped his hands again and took his seat, the men on either side doing the same whilst the rest of the room followed suit as soon as their leaders were settled.

Moments later, a group of servers stepped from doors in the corners behind the head table bearing trays of food. Various dishes, some of which were recognized others not, were brought in and placed on each table within easy reach of those sitting around them. One Naruto Uzumaki chose this moment to turn and finally get a good look at the teammates he hadn't seen for two months.

Immediately to his right was a raven-haired teen dressed in a shirt of the darkest blue that possible without qualifying as black with a collar high enough to just brush against his chin. He also noticed the bandages wrapped around each of his hands much like a certain champion of youth, but there were also black bands of some kind. "Nice to see Kakashi-sensei didn't bring you in late Sasuke."

"Hn," the addressed genin glanced at his blonde teammate out of the corner of his eyes as he began to place a serving of meat on his plate. "It was a close thing. If I hadn't set an alarm we might still be in the canyon."

"The faith you all have in my ability to be punctual is truly inspiring," chimed in a deadpan voice from Naruto's left as a silver-haired man looked at his students with his one uncovered eye. "What did I do to deserve such praise?"

"I'm going to guess just being your usual self Kakashi," a woman's amused voice commented from across the table. Its source was a woman sporting a unique pair of dark red eyes and long raven hair. Kurenai, the jonin captain of team eight, gave a cheeky smirk around the chopsticks she had just slipped between her crimson lips before winking at the chuckling Naruto and turning to listen to the excited Kiba as he began making gestures with his hand whilst talking with the ever-cheerful Choji about something his canine partner had done.

Meanwhile the captain of the sole competing team from Sunagakure actually chuckled from his place a few seats away. "A few of us in Suna have heard tales of the ever-late Copycat Kakashi," he said. "Seems to like appearing at his leisure, almost like a stray cat that wanders back home occasionally." This time Naruto laughed openly and then found himself having to be slapped on the back by the man he had been making fun of after some of his food got lodged in his throat. Baki simply shrugged and continued with his train of thought. "It's nice to know not all rumors you hear are just a waste of air. Something I'll have to remember."

The ice somewhat broken with the harmless banter, conversation broke out amongst the gathered party. Naruto ate quietly for a time before turning once again to the Uchiha and motioning toward his arm with one hand. "So, what's with the fashion accessories," he questioned.

Sasuke looked down at the bands before eyeing the beads around Naruto's own wrist. "I could ask you the same thing," he shot back with his ever-constant smirk. "I noticed you finally ditched most of the orange and hit your growth spurt. You're starting to look like real shinobi now."

"Hey, don't dis the orange teme," he jabbed his chopsticks at his teammate. "It had its uses."

"I'd like to hear em," both looked to the left to see that the puppeteer from Suna was leaning toward them. "That eyesore you were wearing had absolutely zero use from what I was seeing. It sure as hell wasn't any good for stealth, you stuck out like a sore thumb."

A blonde eyebrow rose. "Coming from a guy in a cat suit and makeup I find it hard to take anything you say about being inconspicuous seriously pal." The female member of the team snorted in the middle of sipping at her drink while the 'cat man' growled about war paint. "But let me ask ya something...look at me and Sasuke. If you were seeing us on a street coming toward you without our headbands which one would you expect to be the shinobi?"

Those within earshot and paying attention to the conversation looked between the two as requested. Where Sasuke seemed to be abiding his manners and dressed in what had become expected in the shinobi world nowadays, Naruto was completely different. With the straw hat, orange marked shirt and easy manner he looked more like a civilian…which made him a lot easier to overlook in such a setting as he just described. His grin stretched even further at the sight of eyes widening before glancing up to the table where Jiraiya gave him a nod, obvious pride visible in his expression as he raised a saucer in salute to his pupil. His gaze then traveled to farther down the table where a certain white-eyed male seemed to be ignoring everyone with his usual dismissive manner, simply eating his food. His grin fell into a more neutral expression as looking at the Hyuga brought more memories of the fight he witnessed to the front of his mind. "Getting someone to underestimate you is a handy trick." The target of his ire gave no indication he had heard this either, simply accepting a pepper shaker passed by the only other present member of his team. The kunoichi had explained earlier that their sensei was with their third member escorting him to the stadium. They would be arriving a little late thought.

The meal continued after that with conversation shared here and there, but none seemed aware that Naruto had his attention split between private matters. So, he mentally projected to his roommate. You getting anything further from the guy Aka? He glanced toward the redhead at the table as he ate quietly, not having spoken or been spoken to at all even once so far.

A growl lifted from the back of his mind at his question. "Why do you insist on calling me such things?"

I've told ya before, Kyubi just does not sound like a name. He chewed the mouthful and turned to make some reply to something Kakashi had asked while letting said nine-tailed being ponder his words. That's a title everyone else knows you by but I'm not gonna ask your name since we're not exactly friends either. Thus, until you give me something to use it's gonna be whatever I feel like calling you until then. Now focus please, are you getting anything from our guests?

The growl sounded again, only this time followed by a resigned sigh. Something he had grown accustomed to hearing from his teachers so many times it didn't even faze the blonde as he waited. "There is a sense of…anticipation. Shukaku's host is obviously layered in bloodlust and battle craze to the point I can taste it, but his compatriots are…I'd say they have a level of hostility towards you though the children seem to be more along the lines of just following orders. That one with half his face covered though is burying true hostility beneath that sociable act of his. The same is true for the man sitting next to your precious grandfather. Both of them despise your people for some reason."

Naruto couldn't help the sigh as he pondered what he was told. The fox didn't have any ability to read minds unfortunately, the most he got was emotions and where they were directed. The stronger the emotion was felt the easier it was to discern. It sure made for an interesting visit to Hinata yesterday, the fox was laughing for at least an hour straight but refused to tell him anything, simply telling him it was something he'd have to figure out on his own. Anything worth sharing about the others?

"The Uchiha brat is showing his own sense of anticipation though it's the variety of one looking forward to a good fight."

Kinda expected that since he's slotted to take on Gaara.

"That is true and there is a great deal of it aimed at him but there is some directed at you as well."

That made Naruto pause chewing and steel a glance at his teammate out of the corner of his eye before forcing himself to continue. He heard the fox snickering at the shock but also couldn't deny he was looking forward to clashing with Sasuke himself. The guy had been this big personal milestone he'd set for himself ever since they first met in the academy so to know that little declaration from the brooding king of emo right before the preliminaries wasn't all bullshit was satisfying. He still planned on beating said king into the ground but now it would just feel even better now.

"The shadow user just radiates irritation and boredom," the fox continued on his report. "Seriously I've never seen one of you ningen so unenthusiastic or simply dismissive before. Granted most humans I encounter only project hostility and terror before vanishing altogether."

Well you're not exactly one to inspire sunshine and rainbows roomie. Kami knows how I put up with you sometimes and we've been talking for a couple months.

"And I have found that time to be complete torture for the most part although if you keep reading that story your newest teacher has written I might forgive you."

It took a monumental amount of willpower not to groan aloud at that statement. During the past week as part of his search for a hobby he had tried reading one of Jiraiya's books. What he had not accounted for was that the fox would not only be able to read it through his eyes, but even come to enjoy it!

I still can't see why you would like that stuff, he growled mentally. I didn't think the all mighty fox would care about the mating rituals of us lowly mortals.

The sex is not my draw though the detail he uses for it makes me wonder how well the pervert has…researched. He is a skilled writer and I find the all-around story to be rather enthralling."

A mental shake of the head was all he gave in response to that before turning his attention back to the outside world. As he did he momentarily caught the eye of Neji, his first opponent in the finals. Naruto tilted his head at the older genin in question, but only received a dismissive look before the teen looked back to his food. His partner, the bun-haired Tenten, seemed subdued considering her status as a loss against Temari but also slightly at ease. Naruto chalked it up to the fact the noisier members of that team were absent, he could understand that the two were even more intense than he was about life in general. Whiskered cheeks moved as lips formed a small frown thinking about Lee, but he forced a grin, sipped at his water and found himself being pulled into a conversation with Choji about food.

For another hour or so the meal continued on the same thread of activity, all enjoying the light foods which had been kept so due to the physical activity many of them were soon to engage in. It all came to an end when Hiruzen rose from his place at the head table, dabbing at the corner of his mouth with a napkin. "Well, I say this has been a rather successful light meal," he began with his grandfatherly manner in full swing. "I believe the idea to do this was a good one." He spared a moment to nod at the man at his left who returned it while stroking the full gray beard at the mild compliment before turning back to the group. "Now then, I shall introduce the proctor for the next stage of the event."

A wave of the hand towards the far end of the room had all eyes turning in the direction where a new man stepped out of the shadows of a corner. His clothes were the generic of Konoha's majority of jonin, a set of matching navy turtleneck and pants with the dark green flak jacket, but his headband was in the form of a bandana worn backwards so the tie rested on his forehead covering most of his dark brown hair save for what fell straight to the base of his skull in the back.

His entire body seemed relaxed, as if bored with the situation and he even had his hands in his pockets like he was just on a morning stroll. This was in complete contrast to the genin who all had tensed upon realizing he was there having been none the wiser to his presence. "Wow you kids are jumpy," he drawled around the toothpick between his teeth. Eyes brown as mud flicked over them all before looking back up to the Hokage.

"This is Genma Shiranui," he explained. "All contestants remain here as he will brief you on the proceedings. Everyone else, I suggest you find your seats in the stadium before the event begins. I trust you all wish to have a good vantage point after all." With that, the jonin and teammates filed out after wishing the fighters luck. Once they had all vacated the proctor stepped to the end of the table and addressed his charges.

"Alright sprouts," he grumbled and reached into his vest to pull out a folded slip of paper. "Like the boss said my name is Genma and I'm the one in charge of making sure we have a decent show going on. Don't expect any rules like fight fair or some dumb tourney stuff. We're shinobi, nuff said."

He paused to let the small chuckles pass through the group. "Now before we go into too much detail you probably already noticed there was a certain team missing from the supper. The team from Otogakure has withdrawn from the competition. Apparently, some kind of family emergency happened back in their village and they had to leave about a week ago. This, of course, means the lineup for the matches have changed a bit."

He unfolded the paper and showed them a new bracket list. "Not a whole lot has changed thankfully, but they did switch up a little of the fight order if not the fighters themselves. Naruto Uzumaki and Neji Hyuga are still the opening fight. Next up is Kankuro of Suna fighting Shino Aburame followed by Shikamaru Nara and Temari of Suna facing off. Finally, we have Sasuke Uchiha facing off against Gaara of Suna." He held it for a time before folding it up and slipping it back into his vest. "There'll be a thirty minute break after the first round, let the adoring public have their bathroom breaks and such and give the last fighter a chance to breathe before throwing em into the fray. I'll let the winners know who they're fighting then. Everybody got it?" When they all nodded he clapped sharply, smirking just slightly when a couple actually flinched. "Alrighty then! Line up and we'll go meet our adoring public.

He led the twin lines behind him down a hallway, and with each step Naruto felt the fluttering of his heartbeat beginning to grow. A quick glance to his teammate found them locking eyes for just a moment, blonde and black haired teens both smirking before turning to face forward when their guide and proctor called for a halt. He was standing in front of a closed door, hand up as a booming voice on the other end was heard.

"And that is why we are gathered here today!" Hiruzen seemed to be wrapping up one of his speeches on village unity and cooperation. "To show our people and those of the world what potential our next generation holds. For that reason, I ask that you welcome the Finalists for the Chunin Exams!"

"Smile for your future clients," was the last advice the swordsman offered before opening the door and stepping out into the sunlight beyond. They followed him out and stepped into the far end of a wide arena. Naruto figured it was big enough the Hokage's Mansion could have been built in it with a little space left between the walls and, save for a few clumps of trees, consisted of a flat, open area.

Surrounding the circular battleground was a wall of stone reaching at least three stories in height. Rows of seats stretched even higher from where the walls ended and provided a downward view for the countless spectators using them. And these spectators were cheering as if watching the greatest sport imaginable, shouting, stomping, clapping, etcetera. For one whose general interaction with the public could be boiled down to prank them, flip them off or ignore them glaring daggers in your back it was a bit off putting for Naruto. Still, he forced himself to maintain that smirk, hands in pockets and somewhat relaxed posture while his straw hat cast a shadow over his eyes until they reached the arena's center where Genma called them to a halt.

Hiruzen was standing in a spectator's box far above all in the area where Naruto could just barely see several people sitting. He could make out six others sitting making it at least seven when counting his surrogate grandfather figure and remembered Jiraiya stating something about the five greater Daimyo planning to attend. No doubt that meant their bodyguards were present as well.

The Sandaime raised his hands in a call for peace which the crowd slowly acquiesced to. "The young men and woman standing before you all are the finalists of this year's exam. They have succeeded in passing the tests placed in their path up to this point and soon shall show you all the fruits of their labors. It is with great pride that I, Hiruzen Sarutobi, Sandaime Hokage of Konohagakure, order the commencement of the final exams!"

Once again thunderous applause rained down upon the competitors while their proctor bowed and turned to face them. "Alright Naruto Uzumaki and Neji Hyuga are staying down here with me. The rest of you sprouts are to head up to the booth next to where the kage and daimyo are sitting. Your captains and teammates have seats there too, so you'll have someone to chat with while you're up there. I'll call you down when your turn is up so just kick back, have a snack if you manage to get hungry after just eating and enjoy the show while you can."

Everyone save the two designated by their proctor nodded and headed off while the combatants to be turned from each other to walk ten steps before facing again. Genma stood in the direct middle with one hand in pocket and the other raised above his head. "Alright rules are pretty much the same you got in the preliminaries. Go until I call a winner, your enemy is unconscious, dead or forfeits. Are the fighters ready?"

Naruto's hands came out of his pockets, one drawing the purple cane from its place hanging at his side. His left side turned away from his opponent, presenting a narrow target while raising the blunt weapon into a ready stance, left hand behind his back, a dueling stance ready to react at a moment's notice. He nodded to the proctor who looked to Neji.

The Hyuga took the stance of his clan's taijutsu style, feet spread, and knees bent for quick movement with open hands ready to unleash the deceptively simple strikes that could render his enemies unconscious or even dead should the situation require it. He had yet to activate the eyes of his clan, an obvious statement that he did not consider the blonde worthy of using them. He gave his own nod as answer and Genma raised his hand. "First Match! Naruto Uzumaki against Neji Hyuga—" the hand dropped "—Hajime!"

The brown-haired jonin leaped back to give the two space and watched them like a hawk for any sign of movement. Save for blinking, neither seemed ready to make the first attack just yet. Neji remained on guard, a coiled snake ready to strike at first provocation, but he was put off by the contemplative expression on his opponent. It was like he was trying to decide something.

Wanting to test the difference in this blonde compared to the loudmouth from the preliminaries he began moving to the side as if to circle him. Naruto followed, keeping the curious cane between them and his body poised for sudden action.

"I must admit to being surprised," the prodigy called across the distance between them. "After how you acted the last time we met and during our short time together in the academy I thought you would have launched yourself at me by now." He chuckled. "You were so enraged by my handling of my worthless cousin after all."

Eyes trained to keep up with the incredibly speed of his teammate easily noticed the twitch in Naruto's eye at the mention of her. "Here I thought I would be able to end this within only a few seconds." He shrugged. "No matter, my clan's Juken will see me to victory within moments of our clashing."

"Then why don't you quit talking and get your candy-ass over here," Naruto's rebuttal actually managed to throw off his opponent and he couldn't help the smirk on his face. "Yeah you heard me right pretty boy. Y'know your teammate is a real looker but with a face like yours I bet you could pass as a chick for undercover missions."

He paused, eyes squinting, and head tilted to the side as if considering it. "Yeah…throw a dress on ya, maybe a little makeup, and you'd be looking like an oasis to some very thirsty travelers." The head tilted to the other side, cane slapping into the extended forearm aiming to drive faintly glowing fingers into his throat. With a flick of the wrist he jammed the shepherds' crook-styled handle into Neji's sternum forcing the air from his lungs. The elder genin stumbled back, but still managed to dodge the kunai the hand Naruto had kept hidden until then had thrown. This all happened while Naruto's mouth continued without issue. "And that hair…I mean there's just so much to grab onto."

A quick step brought him close to Neji again and he stabbed forward with the cane as if jabbing with a sword. The Hyuga stepped back and slapped it away only to feel something grab the end of his hair and yank backward at the same time something that felt a lot like a foot struck his back knee. The joint collapsed sending him falling back with the momentum of the tug and he found himself on the ground looking up at a copy of the original. But instead of taking the opportunity presented by his prone status this one was looking at the hair in his grip confused. "Damn I think this is softer than some of the hair I felt on some girls! You must use some special shampoo." This Naruto crouched down next to his head and held up his unoccupied hand to cover his face from the crowd. "Could you tell me what it is? If I give this to a certain girl she might give me a reward if you know what I mean."

The chakra-primed jab to the blonde's face forced it to dispel in a cloud of smoke revealing its clone status and Neji's newly-activated Byakugan warned him of danger coming. He rolled aside just in time to avoid a trio of kunai catching him and using the momentum popped back onto his feet ready for another charge. But none came.

Instead, Naruto was standing with hands crossed on his cane, lips curled in that same insufferable smirk. "Actually, from what my new teacher told me he's gotten some really good information out of brothel workers. Maybe you could get some work there? Hell, with that rod all you Hyuga seem to have shoved up your entitled asses you've got to be used to that kind of thing."

"SHUT UP!" This time he closed the distance before Naruto could react and the satisfaction of hearing the choked gagging from the blonde as his chakra shredded his lungs was almost as good as the feeling of crushing the heir of the main house. Sadly, it is often when one is pausing to celebrate a victory that they are the most vulnerable. For that reason, he did not notice that the cane falling from his opponent's hands bursting to smoke until the foot coming from it slammed into his groin.

The gagging genin vanished and the newest spun on his hands, pulling his foot back from the wide-eyed Neji and building momentum for a spin kick that slammed into his cheek and sent him sprawling. Naruto pushed himself off the ground to create distance between them, landing with almost no sound and one hand bracing his straw hat to keep it from being flung off by the sudden move. "What's wrong pretty boy? Did I touch a nerve?" He chuckled. "Wouldn't want to damage that fragile ego of yours after all."

His stance relaxed, resting the shaft of the purple cane onto his shoulder as he watched Neji stand. He was covering the offended area, but Naruto paid more attention to the hand that had begun to clutch at his stomach. "Oh, got yourself a little tummy ache there pal?" When pale eyes turned to him in shock he watched the slow change in his expression from confused, to realization and finally to horror and was forced to suppress the urge to cackle like a stereotypical villain. "Did you eat something that didn't agree with you?"

"W-what—" a truly pitiful groan escaped his lips, pausing his questioning as he nearly collapsed again "—what did you…do?"

"Funny thing about the clones one can make with the Kage Bunshin no Jutsu," Naruto seemed to ignore his question and assumed a demeanor as if he were a teacher explaining some important fact of life. "See it's nearly perfect in shape and form. Despite being made of chakra it weighs the same as its creator, it smells the same, and even feels like a real body on impact. But here's something I bet most who use it never thought of…if you combine the mental process of creating a Henge with that of forming a clone you can create a clone that's already in a new shape!" He grinned broadly while dropping the hand that had still been sitting on his hat and slipping the cane into his belt with the other, bringing them together to form the basic seal for activating what had become acknowledged as his signature among his team.

"Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" Before the indisposed Neji's eyes a new figure stepped from the cloud which birthed it and for a moment he forgot the agony his innards were inflicting upon him. Because the pretty brunette who appeared was dressed in exactly the same style as the servers from the meal he and the rest of the contestants participated in earlier. In fact, she was the one that had served him his food!

"Wha-but-how-what!?"

The 'girl' giggled, one hand covering her mouth. "Most people can't tell a shadow clone from a person because the chakra shell is so complete," the clone spoke in a perfectly feminine voice. "And that high-strength laxative I slipped into your meal was made specifically to be tasteless so patients in the hospital aren't so unwilling to take it."

The clone vanished with a cheeky wave, leaving what was now confirmed to be the original Naruto to shrug. "Honestly when I realized how far up that stick must've been shoved I thought I'd give you a little help getting rid of it." The smirk dropped into a frown and for a moment he showed Neji the anger and scorn he felt. "Next time you decide to blather on about how anyone is 'fated' to lose I want you to remember something Neji of the Hyuga Clan…I want you to remember that it was the dead last of the class who couldn't even make a passable Bunshin on his graduation test that left you shitting your pants in front of an audience including people from all over Hi no Kuni and our own Daimyo."

And just like that the smile was back and he looked to the slack-jawed Genma. "You might want to call the match now. He's not going to last much longer, and he may need help to get where he needs to be before it gets really embarrassing."

The tokubetsu jonin looked to the other participant in the fight and found he had yet to stop clutching his stomach. His eyes then moved to the viewing box where Hiruzen met them with a nod. His orders clear, Genma raised his hand and called out loud enough his voice would echo through the stadium. "Neji Hyuga has been rendered unable to continue, Naruto Uzumaki moves on to the next round." A medical team rushed onto the field, helping Neji to stand and guiding him toward the door they came from only for everyone to pause when Naruto called out again.

"Hey Neji," his eyes turned back to see his tormentor again. "I was planning to give you something a lot worse. Thank your 'trash' cousin for getting off this lightly." With that he spun on his heel, jammed his hands in his pockets and began to hum whilst walking toward the door which the others had disappeared to after being dismissed from the field.

XXXXX – Kage Booth – XXXXX

"Well that was rather merciless." The speaker was a thin man with an unfolded fan open before his face to cover his expression. Resting atop his dark hair was a large headpiece emblazoned with a small fireball, the symbol of office for the daimyo of Hi no Kuni. "I wonder if he treats all his opponents like that or if this one was special."

"This opponent in particular is of a type Naruto finds the most insufferable," Hiruzen explained to his Daimyo whilst sipping at the tea that had been placed by one of the serving staff assigned to their booth. "Heralded as a prodigy and seeing those they believe to be beneath them as nothing strikes a deep wound in his own past."

The man nodded, fanning himself against the warmth of the steadily climbing sun. "Still I can't help but applaud his ruthless tactics. Not something I have seen often during these events."

"Naruto has a tendency to think outside the box," was the Hokage's reply. "During the break I'll tell you about some of his more memorable pranks while in the academy. He is quite capable of turning things back on people."

"Say it straight sensei," the ever-boisterous Jiraiya threw back another saucer of sake from where he was sitting beside and a little behind Hiruzen in that manner often showing respect to those of station when amongst political company. "The kid has a wicked mind for turning enemy plans on their ass if you give him the time to think." He placed the saucer on the small table before him and for a moment his demeanor become serious. "From what he's told me, it's gotten him and his team out of a bad situation a few times now."

"Sound like you have a few stories yourself Jiraiya-kun," the daimyo mused as the crowd booed. Apparently, the puppet user from Sunagakure had just forfeited, meaning the young heir to the Aburame Clan was moving up to face Naruto in the next match. "I hope to hear them as well."

As Genma called for the next contestant the sage just nodded. "I'll be sure to tell them once we have a chance." While the conversation moved to other subjects, the old toad let his gaze wander a little to the side where the contestants were waiting their turns. He was just in time to see the blonde girl from Suna unfurling her fan, a wind of her own making kicking up and lifting the large weapon with her kneeling upon it to sail out over the arena. 'Impressive skill for a genin that young,' he mused, watching as he touched down with the ease and grace that gave evidence to the training behind such dismounts. He looked back to her take off point and found that the Nara heir was more eager than anyone who knew anything about that clan could have been expecting.

He didn't forfeit immediately and instead actually jumped down from the box, landing on the edge of the wall encircling the battleground and strolling with hands in pockets down the vertical surface. 'And it looks like the other stuff Naruto slipped in there is doing its job nicely. Now this match will give him a bit of time. Good luck kid.'

XXXXX – Infirmary – XXXXX

Instead of going to the competitors' box, Naruto had found a map of the stadium's interior posted on the wall and used it to find his way to the infirmary. After exchanging a few words with the nurse on duty he stepped through the cloth curtain hiding the patient area from view and found one of its occupants glaring at him with a level of hate he was familiar with.

"Have you come to gloat some more Uzumaki?" Neji demanded. "Come to rub in the fact you had to resort to trickery to best me? So desperate to change fate you would act without honor?"

Naruto didn't rise to the taunt, in fact, he wasn't even looking at the so-called prodigy. The swordsman in training was instead looking toward the room's other occupant. Lying with her eyes closed, chest rising and falling in that slow rhythm of breathing one adopts when unconscious, was Hinata.

"She was brought in during your match," the medical shinobi supplied as an explanation when he was asked by the blonde. He flipped a page on her chart and read the details. "Looks like the damage to her lungs she suffered at the hands of her cousin over there was agitated from stress. A few of the ruptures burst and she was brought her unconscious by her teammate." A glance was spared for the elder Hyuga who simply ignored it in favor of continuing in his attempts to glare a hole into the side of Naruto's head. The professional sighed before slipping the chart back into its slot at the foot of Hinata's bed. "Her father is reported to be attending the festivities. We've sent word about her condition. If you'll excuse me I have some stuff to prepare for if we need to see to another patient today."

"Thank you," he called to the departing adult, his eyes never wandering from watching the sleeping kunoichi. His hand rose, as if to touch her cheek, but instead he let it fall on the cane still hanging at his waist. From where he had been confined to his bed under threat by the medics, Neji watched with narrowed eyes. When it seemed that he would not be getting an answer to the question demanded when he first stepped into the infirmary, he decided to broach a different subject.

"You said…it was Hinata that kept you from using something worse than the laxative," he said. "How did she convince you?"

Naruto remained still for a moment longer, and then his head turned to look at his defeated opponent from the corner of his eye. "I went to visit Hinata yesterday," he began. "I told her what I was planning to do…and what I was going to slip you." From his pocket, the hand that had rested there drew a small vial of clear liquid. "This chemical, according to what I've read in medical texts, would have mixed with your blood and made it temporarily unable to absorb oxygen. You would have suffocated, the same fate Hinata would have suffered if the medics in the tower weren't as good as they were."

If the information itself hadn't have made Neji's blood run cold, the nearly emotionless manner in which it was delivered surely did the trick. He could find no words, could not utter even a sound, as he watched Naruto examine the small vial. "It was so easy to get too. I simply went to the slums in a basic disguise and stepped into this shady little apothecary. The old lady there was all too willing to help me out when I slipped her some extra coin."

"But—" blue eyes dropped down to the sleeping face again "—Hinata asked…no she begged me not to go through with it. I couldn't understand it, you tried to kill her, and she wanted to just let it go!" The air seemed to shimmer around the genin, a slight tingle of charged energy dancing across the dark-haired youth's skin as he listened to the explanation. "I asked how she could care so much for someone so arrogant, so hateful, so…so fucking stupid! And then she told me about her uncle. A brave man who loved his brother so much he was willing to die that he might live. She told me about the kidnapping, about how Kumo's ambassador actually had the gall to sneak into her clan's home to steal her away in the night.

"How by sheer luck her father had felt uneasy that night and gone for a walk only to stumble upon the crime and with years as a veteran shinobi reacted on his training and slew the intruder. Kumo, of course, tried to turn this to their advantage and demanded the head of her father, who was willing to actually bend to that farce because the alternative meant war."

The vial was placed on the nightstand next to Neji's bed, Naruto moving to sit in the chair beside it as he finally met Neji's stare. "And then she told me about how her father had insisted she sleep in the same room as her parents after the event, worried a follow up attempt may happen since they figured Kumo might believe they would feel secure in stopping the first and thus may get arrogant. They, of course, did not."

Naruto paused there, looking again to Hinata with a contemplative expression while Neji could only stare wide-eyed. He was having trouble associating the cold, distant head of his clan with the concerned father he was being told about. Though, when he actually did think about it, it did make sense. From what Neji remembered of his early childhood, Hiashi had been a bit standoffish and proper, but he laughed with his wife and had shared advice with him at times during training. But, after the death of his wife due to complications in labor…he had changed.

What had once been familial closeness tempered with strict etiquette became cold logic and stern hand of discipline. "One night—" the genin's story suddenly continued, jolting the Hyuga from his considerations to look back at the speaker "—Hinata was woken from her sleep by angry voices. Afraid and curious at the same time, she stumbled out of the room past her sleeping mother and toward the door of her father's study. Through the shoji she could hear her father arguing, with her uncle and grandfather…and the Hokage."

"I was willing to go through with the demands of Kumo," a voice cut in before Naruto could continue. Heads turned in shock as man stepped into the room. He was tall, and like Neji was deceptively slim of frame with long black hair falling in a curtain down his back. Over the traditional robes of his clan, the patriarch wore a dark green haori. "The idea of using the body double was actually Hokage-sama's because he knew of our clan's seal that prevented the Byakugan from being taken from members of our branch family. Hizashi was my mirror in all but that mark so it would have been an easy ruse to pull off."

"But I refused. I would not sacrifice my brother for such a thing and had already ordered our sealmaster prepare to remove his seal and place one on myself. I thought it an adequate move, for Hizashi was as strong as myself in our clan's style and he had sired an heir of great potential." Pale, pupiless eyes turned to the girl lying still asleep in her cot. "More so than I believe either of my daughters would possess. However, the elders used their right of veto to overturn my decision as head of the clan and before I could do anything…Hizashi used my anger and lowered guard to land a Juken strike to my stomach."

"As my consciousness faded, I heard my brother whisper in my ear words I will never be able to forget even if I manage to live to the age when senility takes me. He told me he didn't give a damn about the clan keeping its structure or anything like that. He was saving his brother from death…and finally choosing his own fate for the first time in his life."

The patriarch of the Hyuga Clan met the once-again shocked gaze of his nephew, the teenager that had loathed him for his place in life and blamed him for his father's death. And then, he did something that would really shake the boy to his core. He knelt to the floor and leaned forward to press his forehead to the cold tiles. "I am so sorry I failed to protect your father," they heard him say. "And I am sorry that I couldn't get up the courage to tell you the truth until now."

A heavy silence fell over the room, that was immediately shattered as Naruto stood from his chair with an uncomfortable expression. "Look, this is obviously a personal family matter. Something you shouldn't have an observer for. I've pretty much said my piece, so I'll give you some privacy." As he stepped to leave, he stopped at the curtain and looked back to his fellow genin. "Hey Neji…if I didn't fight against what people told me all my life, I wouldn't be wearing this headband at all—" he tapped the metal plate covering his forehead to emphasize the point "—so don't let yourself be defined by other people alright? I believe you'll be a lot happier that way." Without waiting to hear a response he stepped through the curtain and waved to the nurse on duty as he continued out into the hall planning to join the other competitors and hopefully catch the end of Shikamaru's match.

Unfortunately, it seemed life had other plans. As he turned a corner to the staircase he found Shino stumbling down towards him, an unconscious Kiba draped over his shoulders in a fireman's carry. Without thinking he leaped the remaining distance and pressed a finger to the wild child's throat, only slightly relaxing when he found a steady pulse. "What happened?"

"When Hinata collapsed an Anbu provided emergency treatment," the ever-stoic teammate of Kiba's replied. "He then ordered Kiba to carry her to the infirmary, but I became suspicious after he took far too long to return. I excused myself and went to investigate, finding him unconscious and was carrying him to the infirmary myself and now we have met here."

Naruto nodded and thinking quickly pulled a small scroll from the pouch at his hip. "His pulse is normal," he explained while unraveling the length of paper. "His breathing isn't labored, in fact it looks like he was just knocked out." One thumb was pressed against his incisor and sharp pain followed before he pressed the now-bleeding appendage to the seal he'd revealed. A small pack appeared from the smoke that billowed out and after a brief search pulled out a small mesh tube with what looked like cotton stored inside. Naruto bent the tube, resulting in a faint crackling of something inside. "Put him down."

Shino complied, resting his teammate on the ground positioned to sit up against the wall. Akamaru, ever close to his partner's side, moved up to paw at Kiba's leg, a concerned wine in his throat. "Inuzuka have sensitive noses," they heard Naruto recite aloud. "I suggest you back up, he may react violently to this." The Aburame only had enough time to take a single step backward before the smelling salts were held under Kiba's nose. Moments later that hand was jerked back with a fresh bit mark and the blonde yowled in pain from the sudden action. "Dammit! Biting man? Seriously!?"

"Ugh kami what the hell!?" Kiba paid no mind to the pain he had just inflicted, both hands covering his nose as he tried to breathe after inhaling such a strong smell. "What the hell was that?"

"Smelling salts ya asshole! Dammit I'm actually bleeding! How sharp are your teeth?"

Kiba made to give some retort, no doubt layered in vulgarity as his clan was infamous for doing, but a hand was firmly clamped over his mouth, its twin doing the same to Naruto's. "Amusing as it is to see you to trying to out curse the other," Shino's calm voice grabbed their attention, and both focused upon the spectacled visible half of their fellow genin's face. "I do believe we need to know what happened to you Kiba."

Surprisingly to Naruto, the brash, headstrong Inuzuka visibly restrained himself in the face of his more composed teammate and eventually sighed. "Yeah you're right Shino. Sorry about the hand Naruto," he rubbed his face, focusing better now that he'd had some time to actually wake up. "Kind of a knee-jerk reaction."

"It's fine," Naruto grumbled whilst wiping away the little bit of blood to reveal skin already closing up. "Lucky for me that I heal pretty fast, so we'll just chalk this up to me getting a little life lesson. Next time sacrifice a clone to waking people up."

"A wise decision I believe," Shino acknowledged before addressing Kiba again. "Although a topic we can cover later, considering you have yet to tell us what happened to leave you unconscious on the floor.'

"Yeah, well I dropped Hinata off at the infirmary like that Anbu said. The nurse there said the emergency treatment she'd gotten was enough to save her from any further issues and she just needed rest, so I came back. I ran into the guy on the way, so I stopped to thank him and let him know, but…Akamaru was alerting to him." When all eyes drifted to the mentioned pooch they got a nod and bark which Kiba took in stride. "Yeah he was saying his scent was familiar but before I could do anything else that Anbu guy slapped his palm into my chest and that's the last thing I remember until someone put that shit under my nose."

Naruto frowned, that didn't seem right at all. Stroking his chin in thought he didn't say a word for a moment, before nodding to himself. "Kiba…is that Anbu's scent on you by any chance?" If the situation were not as serious as he believed it to be, the blonde would have laughed at the sight of the teen smelling himself.

"Yeah his smell is on my jacket, looks like he set me down carefully, so I wouldn't fall hard and draw attention."

"Good, alright I've got an idea." His thumb was bitten in the next second and without a word to either of the two others he formed the chain of signs he had practiced during the entirety of the training period and slapped the ground with the bloody hand. A small puff of smoke later and the three boys and single dog were joined…by a toad a little larger than Akamaru.

The red amphibian blinked, taking a moment to look around. When his eyes locked onto Naruto still crouching where he'd performed the summoning his wide lips spread into a grin. "Heya Naruto," he waved. "We hanging out again?"

"Not this time Gamakichi," the blonde replied while fishing a small peppermint from his pocket. Handing it over to his friend his expression turned serious again. "I've got a little errand I need ya to run." He explained everything that happened with Kiba finally chiming in when he got over the oddness of what he was seeing. "You said you've got a pretty good schnoz, so I was hoping you could get a whiff of the guy and then go tell the ol' perv while we tell our captains."

"That's easy enough, where is he?"

"Last I saw he's up rubbing elbows in the VIP box." The toad's eyes lit up and Naruto couldn't help but chuckle. "Keep the mooching to a minimum alright? There's supposed to be a daimyo or two up there."

"Which means the food will be top notch!" Gamakichi declared and set off without waiting for further instructions. "Oh, I'm definitely gonna hold this over 'Tatsu's head!"

"Sooo," Kiba's drawl cut through the awkward silence, snapping Naruto out of his exasperated staring after his messenger. "You have a summon contract now?"

"Yeah, ran into an old perv at the hot springs and he knocked out my tutor, so I strong-armed him into teaching me for a bit."

"It would seem the rumors of Jiraiya's vices are not mere conjecture or exaggeration as I first suspected." When they glanced at Shino, who had just voiced his opinion, the teen shrugged. "Jiraiya is the only known summoner contracted to the toad clan still alive and he is a member of our shinobi corps. He is also infamous as both a powerful combatant and incredibly obsessive pervert. He is also author of the Icha Icha series which is quite popular among male and female readers alike, though females often seemed less willing to admit such. Thus, when you summoned a toad it is only logical that this pervert you met was none other than Jiraiya himself. I can only deduce that you must have found some way to earn his intrigue and respect enough to warrant sharing such a useful ability as a summoning contract."

"…Thanks for the explanation Shino," Naruto seemed to take that in stride, something that had Kiba looking at him a little surprised since it took a while for him to get used to his teammate's habits. "Anyway, we should head for our own booth."

Without another word the group set off, thankfully not getting lost as Naruto had not been to the booth yet and thus wasn't sure of the way. Benefits of being in the company of trackers in training, that already had been to the box of course. When they stepped out of the hallway and into the open once again, it was just as the crowd was beginning to cheer. Curious, Naruto stepped up to the edge and looked down.

Standing in the middle waiting for his opponent was the other male genin of Team Seven. With hands on his hips and sporting the same cocky assurance he was known for, Sasuke looked ready to get started. That smirk grew just a little wider when movement from the wall down below drew his eye, Gaara had stepped onto the field. The two ignored the cheering crowd, only having eyes for each other as the sand user continued his calm pacing toward his foe, taking up the position across from him as indicated by their proctor.

"Alright you two, same rules apply so I won't bother repeating em for now. Are both fighters ready?"

Sasuke shifted from his relaxed posture, stance widening slightly, body poised like a spring ready to pop into action at the slightest hint of provocation.

Gaara crossed his arms, sand already rising from his gourd and dropping to the floor in a roiling mass of tan.

Both nodded, and Genma raised his hand. "Fourth Match, Sasuke Uchiha and Gaara Sabaku…Hajime!"

XXXXX—Cut—XXXXX

Crappy Cliffhanger for the win!

Yeah, I probably could have gone on through this match, the reporting and kicking off the invasion, but I'd kept you guys waiting for longer than I wanted to already, so I decided instead of risking losing all my work with another laptop malfunction because I was taking too long and nitpicking I found a decent cutoff point and here we are.

Now like I said in the opening AN Naruto was a bit dark with how he handled Neji and what he was planning to use. In my head it kinda worked out that Naruto, with his circumstances, should not have developed into such an idealist. Hated, scorned and mistreated for years he would have cherished any level of friendship he could get and protect them viciously. The sudden kindness of Hinata giving him that ointment, plus the fact she tried so hard only to get repeatedly insulted by her own family was something that would have set him off.

Not to mention the fact Neji simply dismissed him, just like everyone else when he was growing up. I could see this triggering Naruto a bit, so he decided to make Neji suffer, but toned it down when Hinata explained a bit. But he was still going to humiliate at the prick.

This is just my opinion, I do not have a degree in psychology, so I couldn't possibly begin to explain whether it's true or not just that it's how it worked in my brain.

Also, who's to say Naruto was being honest with Neji in what that would have done? Nobody but myself, Arashi and Naruto know for sure :P

Terms I used some may not know or recognize:

Aka – according to what sites I looked at is the Japanese word for Red. Probably a little condescending calling him by the fur color but it's a part of canon that Naruto has never been much for naming things, so I tried to think of something he would have called Kurama since he doesn't know his name.

Shoji – from what I read this is the proper term for the door, window or room divider consisting of translucent paper over a frame of wood which holds together a lattice of wood or bamboo that we see in traditional Japanese homes in either real life or anime.

Haori – according to almighty Wikipedia a haori is a traditional Japanese hip- or thigh-length kimono-style jacket, worn over a kosode. On Hiashi's page of the Naruto wikia it said the dark robe he wore over the rest of his clothes was a haori.

And that's the story for today folks. I hope you enjoyed and I'll have the next chapter up as soon as I can. Though I'm trying to get Shaman's new first chapter out and working on the next one for my Ben10 fic so once again sorry if it takes a bit.

Thanks for coming everyone and hope the rest of your day goes well, this is Yurei King signing out! SEE YA NEXT TIME!