Touhou Doujin: Jean's Magical Education

Chapter 4: See Reporters, take warning

Hakurei Shrine, ten anti-meridian

Jean Franc woke up from his relatively comfortable sleep in his futon, noticing Reimu hadn't woken up yet. He decided that after the somewhat embarrassing events of yesterday that he should make her breakfast.

However, he didn't have the first clue about making Japanese-style food, nor was there anything ready-made in that he could easily cook. After a quick think, he decided against the idea, and decided to go back to sleep. However, before he could, a voice called out to him from outside.

"Hey, Jean! Are you still there?" Marisa's voice shouted from beyond the door, "I have someone who wants to meet you..."

Jean face-palmed, not wanting to meet new people for a while. Fortunately for him, when he opened the door, he noticed it wasn't someone new, but someone he had met before.

Marisa was standing next to Fujiwara no Mokou, and the latter bowed slightly as she said, "Hello again..."

"Ah, hello Miss... Mokou, is that correct?" Jean asked, "So, why is it you are here?"

Marisa shrugged her shoulders, "She didn't tell me, she was just asking for your whereabouts..."

Mokou decided to take over from here, "Yes, well, there's a reason for that..."

Marisa chuckled, "Oh, well it must be suspicious, then! I'll be sure to tell Aya and Hatate about this secretive behaviour..."

"You dare and I'll kill you..." Mokou threatened, fully intending to carry out the threat.

Jean sweat-dropped, "Uh... perhaps it is best that this doesn't become a fight..."

Reimu could be heard upstairs, and it was as Marisa began to say, "Well, if you want to kill me, please can you give all the books I've borrowed back to all the..." that the shrine Maiden came into view, seemingly wearing a pot on her head.

Marisa stifled a laugh, Mokou rolled her eyes, and Jean asked the question on all three's minds, "Why are you wearing a pot on your head?"

"Shut up... I don't want anyone to see my face... soon I'll be the local joke..." Reimu whined, "Anyway, what are you doing on my property? I know there's you, Marisa, but who's with you? It isn't a youkai, is it?"

Mokou muttered, "If you took the ridiculous head covering off you'd know that I'm a human..."

"Oh... okay... so, who is it?" Reimu asked again.

Jean walked up to Reimu before she stumbled into the wall, lifting the pot off her head, "I can not allow you to keep wearing that..."

Reimu swiped the cooking vessel back off Jean, "Hey, I'm in charge! If I want to wear it, I will... oh, hello, Mokou..."

Mokou nodded, "Hello. I am here to ask this man a few questions, you wouldn't mind if I stayed, would you?"

Reimu placed the pot back on her head, and said, "Um... if Marisa gets out, yes. I'm sure she knows why..."

"Hey, it isn't my fault you're a rabid love machine..." Marisa stated the truth.

"Well, Mokou, you can let Marisa stay and leave without your questions being answered, or you can help me kick her out... your choice..." Reimu offered.

Jean asked, "That is unfair, is it not? I don't think that this is the..."

But before Jean could finish, both Reimu and Mokou were taking pot shots at Marisa, who soon got on her broom and flew off, shouting, "I'll see you later, Jean! Don't let Reimu..."

However, the rest of her speech was obscured due to distance, and Reimu smiled from underneath her pot, "Okay, question away..."

Jean sighed, and decided to go along with it, "Fine, what is it that you want to ask?"

"Well, I was wondering... the outside world, has anyone found the Hourai Elixir? And drank it, like I have?" Mokou asked.

"What is this... Hourai Elixir?" Jean thought to himself, then remembered the article he had read on Fujiwara no Mokou, "Ah, the serum of immortality?"

"Yes... has anyone drank it?"

"Well, I do recall reading a journal of the sciences that mentioned that lobsters have the eternal life and that the scientists are trying to extract the..." Jean became excited, however this excitement got removed as Mokou interrupted him.

"But... does that render you unable to be killed? I've eaten a lobster before..." Mokou remarked.

"No, the lobsters can die, but only if they are killed. They have... what is it... er... the Télomérase... it stops the ageing..." Jean sighed, "But if they are killed, it doesn't stop that..."

Mokou mumbled, "As I thought... so the Elixir truly is magical after all... is there a way to destroy... that age-stopping chemical?"

Jean looked into Mokou's eyes... they were a moderately deep red, and within them lay a yearning... a yearning to simply age, grow old and die, like any other human. The quite disconcerting colour of the eyes seemed mellower than a normal human with red contacts, almost as if the colour had faded over time.

"...You think that it is the Télomérase that has made you this way?" Jean shook his head, "No, there is more... I can just tell. So, you can get killed, but come back? Is it painful? My book claims it is..." Jean Franc wasn't sure if this was an entirely appropriate question to ask.

Not quite remembering her article, Mokou said, "I'm sure whatever it says, it's an understatement... all the different ways I have died, all the varying levels of pain... I've been through everything a human cares to go through..."

Reimu actually took pity on Mokou, putting her hand on her shoulders, "You're making me grateful that I will die at some point... if that makes you feel any better. It's just, if I were you, I'd hate those who take death for granted more than anyone else..."

Of course, her speech lost all power due to it being delivered from under a pot, but Mokou nodded, "Yes, it's true... but please don't gloat me by flaunting your ability to die..."

Jean's eyes started to fill, and Mokou picked up on this almost instantly, "What's the matter? I'm not upsetting you, am I?"

Jean shook his head, "No, no, it's nothing... are... are... you able to suffer from... the maladie du motoneurone?"

"What's that?"

"It is a disease that renders you unable to do anything... you are fully aware of what you want to do... but your body does not respond to your thoughts.. you are trapped... and eventually, you become unable to breath, and it is then... when... pourquoi avez-vous du etre conduite, Patricia?"

"Sorry, what did you say, I'm not familiar with your language..." Mokou muttered, wanting to know what he said without hurting his quite evidently delicate feelings.

"It does not matter... anyway, if you have been in that situation, it is then that you truly wish for death..." Jean looked downwards, then turned from Mokou, trying his best not to cry.

Reimu took the pot off her head, and said, "Hold on, what's wrong, Jean? Is it about your..."

"YES! IT IS ABOUT MY WIFE!" Jean exploded, "My wife wanted to die more than anything... she could not say it... but I saw it in her eyes... she was pleading... do you know what it's like to want to see the one you love die?"

Mokou felt a pang of guilt tear through her chest, "I... If I knew, I wouldn't have asked you... how do these people stay alive for as long as they do?"

Jean spat through his teeth, "Ils le forcent... á rester en vie... il est inutile, elles ne seront jamais guerís..."

Mokou quietly said, "Forget I asked... I'm sorry, I was being selfish."

The immortal woman began to walk out of Reimu's house, when Jean said, still facing away from Mokou, "I'm sorry. It was impossible for you to have known about that..."

Reimu was stunned, "I... I'm sorry I've... been the way I've been to you, Jean. If I knew you'd been through that, I would never have kissed you, or even thought of you in that..."

Jean grabbed his broom, and put on his hat, "Do not hate yourself, I shouldn't have let you... anyway, I am going to see Marisa, if that is okay with you..."

Mokou's expression lifted a little, "Can I be the one to lead you there? If it is not too much trouble, I want to ask you a few more questions..."

Reimu's sombre expression soon became an indignant one, "HEY! He's living with me, I'll take him!"

Jean face-palmed, "We could just go out as a group of three..."

Mokou and Reimu both sweat-dropped, somewhat bemused after coming to the realisation that they were both fighting over a triviality...

After grabbing all the necessary supplies and carving holes in her pot, Reimu walked out of her house, followed by Jean, and shortly after, Mokou. Jean wondered how the pot would conceal her identity considering Reimu's somewhat distinctive getup of red and white with detached sleeves.

After a short silence, Jean continued the conversation, "So, what other questions do you have to ask me?"

Mokou smiled, "Well, one of my other questions was... do I look young compared to women of the outside world?"

Reimu mused at Mokou's vanity, "Hmph! That's a stupid thing to ask..."

"No, it is not..." Jean defended Mokou, "It is strange, because you do look young in the body and the face, but... your hair, it is unlike any humans at all... like that of an ageing woman, but not as... how would you say it... crépus? Er... like the filaments... ah, wiry, that is the word! Yes, your hair is not as wiry as the old women, but is as white as them..."

Mokou grinned at hearing an entire speech all about her looks, "So... would you consider me... beautiful?"

"Uh..." Jean whispered to Reimu, "What do I do? I don't want to tell her she isn't, but she might become angry if I say she is... and I have seen her when she is angry..."

Reimu whispered back, "I'm not sure... I know if I were her, I'd like to hear that I'm pretty..."

Mokou knew what they were talking about, "So, why are you being quiet? Are you hiding something from me?"

Jean laughed nervously, "Er... I am... how you say... unsure how to answer that question..."

Jean was beginning to wonder if all these women were desperate for male attention... surely the case of Sappho of Lesbos applied to most of the women here, right? That said, Marisa seemed quite in control of that side of her...

"Oh, I see... okay, the other question I want to ask is this: I've heard great tales of the ability to manipulate fire being widespread in the outside world... is it true?" Mokou swiftly moved on from the previous conversation.

"Well, we used to use fire for everything, from transport to the warming of the houses... but we now simply use fire to produce the electricity, as that is... easier to use, I think..." Jean answered.

"Fire can be transformed into electricity?" Mokou was impressed, "Just how does that work?"

Jean tried to think back to his time in school, "There was... I think that it worked by using the magnetic metals... the generator, as you would say in English. It uses the steam from heating water to spin itself around, as it is usually connected to... a turbine? Yes, a turbine... and... well, it is complex, but if you have wires near this spinning magnet, it gets what is called le courant electrique... I mean, the Electric Current, and... er, I am sorry, that is all I know..."

Reimu pondered, "So, that metal wheel that Nitori was attaching to the geyser... was that a turbine?"

"Who is this Nitori?" Jean asked.

"A kappa... a sort of water youkai, for the sake of simplicity, who likes technology from the outside world a lot..." Reimu stopped to sigh, "...She's annoying as hell, but she claims to be making all of our lives easier, or something..."

Youkai Mountain, Hatate's house, ten-thirty anti-meridian

Hatate was passed out on her desk, while Aya was snorting ink and typing frantically in the seat next to her, her tongue slightly out of her mouth. Both tengu had been up all night discussing the best ideas for a story, and how to announce that they, for whatever reason, had now become partners in crime.

Aya stopped typing for a moment to take another monumental snort from the bottle of ink beside her, and exhaled slowly, "Oooh... that's the stuff..."

Her solvent-sniffing revelry was soon ended by the door unexpectedly opening. Alice Margatroid entered the house, followed by Byakuren Hijiri.

Aya pushed the bottle of ink away from herself so as to deny her habit, but did it so quickly that she knocked it over, dying the table black. "Uh... ah... what are you doing here?"

"I was just for a date with Byakuren... it's much stranger that you're here, if you want the truth. So, are you ruining your competition's paper..." Alice began to accuse Aya of sabotaging the paper, but noticed that Hatate was sleeping right next to where Aya was sitting, "Uh... Hatate, what's going on?"

Hatate slowly lifted her head from the table she'd been resting it on, and mumbled, "Like, is there something wet in my hair?"

Aya sweat-dropped as she noticed the spilt ink which was now making Hatate's hair black, "Uh, no, you don't..."

Alice folded her arms, "So, you going to explain this?"

Hatate put her hand to her hair, and looked at it to clarify that her head was covered in ink. She scowled slightly, and then explained, "Like, me and Aya are business partners now! You won't believe it... the shrine maiden... she has a boyfriend!"

"Sanae, or Reimu?" Alice knew that living on the Youkai mountain usually involved worshipping at the Moriya shrine over the Hakurei Shrine.

"Reimu Hakurei..." Aya continued for Hatate, "She's been acting odd for a while, then I saw her beating up that sky neighbour of hers I discovered, and became interested..."

"And, like, I wanted to see what else I could write up about that crazy youkai man who's dating Yukari, then saw him getting battered..." Hatate told her side of the story, "Anyway, we saw that shortly after, the normal magician came out with two unfamiliar people,..."

"Well, one for me..." Aya added.

"But anyway, she then kissed the man of the group, and that's when I..."

"And I..."

The two reporters then spoke in unison, "THAT'S WHEN WE TOOK OUR PICTURES!"

The tengu got out their prints, and showed them off to Alice and Byakuren, and the latter remarked, "I say, I never expected a shrine maiden to be able to kiss so passionately... aren't they supposed to remain virgins?"

"Are they? I didn't think they did..." Aya smirked, "Regardless of whether they're supposed to or not, let's make it a scandal!"

Byakuren turned red, "Uh... perhaps it would be best if you didn't slander the Shinto faith... I mean, it's been through it's fair share of battles with Buddhism, but I wouldn't want to be responsible for any additional conflict..."

Hatate butted in, "Then, like, we'll make you an Anonymous source! You have my word!"

Alice was still getting her head round the photographic evidence of Reimu being with a man. "This... do you know who this man is?"

"Like, perhaps he's the same as the guy who's dating Yukari!" Hatate hypothesised, "I can see it now... Taiyou Tencho: Two-timer between the species!"

Alice said, "Look, I know that perhaps to you, all men look the same, but I know these two men are completely different..."

Aya sniggered, "Yeah, not to mention that we saw that guy getting beaten up by her moments before... you're not very sharp, are you, Hatate?"

Hatate was not to be defeated, though, "No! You don't get it... perhaps it's an abusive relationship! Perhaps we could put in a little 'If you've been affected by today's issue' segment..."

Alice shook her head, and pointed to the pictures, "Look at him... he's very different to Daw... uh... Tencho. He has light brown hair, while Tencho has black hair, and it's in a different style. He's also wearing different clothes, but it does make you wonder why Yutaka... uh... the girl with pink hair... was following him around."

Aya was piecing together the evidence, "My theory is this: There are two new men in Gensokyo... one is this Taiyou person Hatate's talking about, the other is this mystery lover of Reimu. Hold on... Hatate, show me a photo of Taiyou Tencho..."

Hatate obliged, and then Aya said, despite Alice's repeated silent indications not to, "Oh, that guy looks an awful lot like that Dawitsu fellow..."

Hatate cocked her head, "Like, who's Dawitsu?"

Byakuren spoke up, "Alice told me all about him... apparently he was the first person Alice..."

Alice cut in, "I told you not to say anything about that..."

"...but you seemed pretty loud and proud about it at the time..." Byakuren pointed out.

Hatate got up, and walked up to Alice, "Like, you're my deputy... you tell me everything. Like, what secret are you keeping from me?"

Aya sat back in her chair, and tapped her Tokin, "Isn't it obvious by her efforts to hide it? This is how I know you're inexperienced..."

"Oh! Well, like, if it's so obvious, why don't you just say it?" Hatate shouted, "So, who's this Dawitsu?"

Alice felt forced into a corner, "He's... a good friend of mine. He's... helped me fix my house, got me to talk to you about finding love... he even... let me kiss him..."

Hatate's face broke into an expression resembling pure ecstasy, "AH HA HA HA! Hear that, Aya? There's our page two story! Tencho revealed to be Dawitsu! Cheating nature revealed by Anonymous former lover!"

Alice blushed, "I wasn't his lover..."

Aya, remarkably the calmer of the two tengu, said, "I wouldn't focus too much on that. The issue at hand is the man we don't know... all we know is that he has a strange accent, almost reminiscent of... AH HA!"

Alice, Hatate, and Byakuren simultaneously fulfilled the unasked of request, "What have you figured out?"

"...I went to the outside world with that Dawitsu fellow, and the people in a certain part of it called... Bayeux, I think... spoke in a different language, known as French, if I remember rightly..." Aya pointed to the ceiling with pride in her intelligence, "...and this language caused the users to, when speaking English, have an odd, almost broken-sounding accent, just like the accent this man had..."

Hatate knew where this was going, "So, the only place the man could have come from was..."

After yet another mind meld, the two shouted, "THE OUTSIDE WORLD!"

Byakuren sighed to herself, "Alice, if you want, we can go to the temple another time, if you're busy..."

"No, no, I'll go with you..." Alice half-promised, hoping that the Tengu wouldn't require assistance.

Of course, Hatate smashed that hope, "Like, no! We need you to attest that you know the identity of Taiyou Tencho! You also need to attest that you kissed him!"

Aya shook her head, "Prioritise the front-page issue... your stupid crack pairings can wait, this here pairing is FOR REAL!"

"But, like, how are we going to find out the name of this new man?" Hatate asked.

Aya smiled, and turned to Alice, "Hey, Alice, just go on your date with Byakuren as planned, but if you come across Reimu, tell me. If she's with the man, ask for his name, okay?"

"But she knows I work for Hatate..." Alice pointed out.

"Ah... I guess if I know then everyone else will too..." Aya rubbed her chin slightly, "I know... Byakuren, you ask them. If you do the asking, it won't look suspicious."

Alice sighed to herself, "I never realised being an assistant to a reporter was such a hard job..."

The Forest of Magic, outside Marisa's house, noon

Jean was reading a spell-book, while making a pair of options float beside him. "Magic A, Magic A, the enemy in front will fry today..."

A large, green, explosive shot fired from both options simultaneously. Marisa clapped for Jean, with Reimu unenthusiastically saying, "Yay."

Marisa patted Jean on the back, "Now, all you need to do, just like you're getting saying 'Green Shot, Green Shot, boy do you hurt a lot' quickly, is say the spell repeatedly several times over. Then, when you've got the hang of that, say 'Green Shot, Green Shot, boy do you hurt a lot, Magic A, Magic A, the enemy in front will fry today'... that's both spells all together... over and over..."

"What will that do?" Jean asked.

Reimu snorted, "Isn't it obvious? You'll shoot both types of shot over and over..."

Marisa put her hands to her hips, "Reimu's right! That's an attack type I like to call 'Barrage A'. I only use it when the opponents the one throwing around the spell-cards..."

Jean asked, "What are these... spell-cards you speak of?"

Mokou, who had been standing in the sidelines in silence, pulled a card from her pocket, saying "This", and threw it to Jean, who caught it perfectly.

He observed the card... it had a title that read 'Hourai: Fujiyama Volcano'. As well as the title, a few commands were written on it: 'Release familiars in a cluster, trigger a large explosion. Once detonated, fire straight at enemy, and move so as to evade fire. Release waves of bullets periodically during previous steps, and once the cycle is over, release three clusters of familiars, each directly at the enemy, then fire as before.'. A picture in the centre of the card demonstrated what the attack looked like.

"So... it is an attack?" Jean asked.

"Yes." Reimu placed a hand on the back of her head, "I invented the rules. Basically, if you start a spell-card, the other person can't use a spell card, and if they do, they lose what I call a 'spell card bonus'. No-one can use other people's spell-cards, they are personal to the creator. Some day, I'll teach you how to make them... but not now."

Marisa nodded, "Agreed, you're not ready yet... and Reimu, there is one exception to the..."

"Don't remind me of that guy..." Reimu muttered, "He needs exterminating, I swear..."

The Human Village, Keine's Village School, about the same time

The dinner bell was rang by the school cook, and the children flooded out of Dawitsu's classroom, all acting as if they had been deprived of food for years rather than hours.

After the class was empty, Dawitsu exhaled, and placed his teacher's hat on the desk as he reclined in the desk's seat, "Ugh... what a day... I wish someone would just come up and exterminate me..."

Yutaka nodded, "Yeah, I can't believe that the same seven people who gave me an apple also fired spit-balls at you... I guess children must be easily influenced by their peers..."

Dawitsu suddenly tensed up, and slammed his fist on the desk, "It was nothing to do with peer pressure! They all love you, and hate me! You don't have to lie to make me feel better..."

"Well... what are you going to do? Are you going to continue teaching?" Yutaka didn't quite know how to deal with this situation.

"Of course I am! They'll warm up to me, I know it! In fact... tomorrow, we're gonna have a cosplay party!" Dawitsu gained determination from the mere implication that he was a quitter.

"A... cosplay party? But how will that teach them any..." Yutaka began to ask, but was stopped in her tracks.

"Now... all I have to do is set them a homework of making an outfit... in fact... no, it won't be 'homework', that would just make me more unpopular... I'm going to ask them what their favourite Youkai is, and then make all the outfits in one night!" Dawitsu seemed perfectly fine with wasting his hours just to be 'cool' to a bunch of human children.

Yutaka sighed. There was no way she was going to change his mind. "So, should we eat lunch? I got the cook to make us some tomato soup..."

Dawitsu began to leave the classroom, as did Yutaka. "That's brilliant, I've been dying for a good..." Dawitsu stopped when he noticed that Hatate was in the School Kitchen, delivering a newspaper to the Cook. After she saw Dawitsu looking at her, she quickly scrambled away.

Yutaka grinned, "Oh, it's finished already? I wonder what's in it?"

"What's finished?"

"Well, I didn't tell you, but last night, there was news coverage when Jean decided to reconcile with Reimu... read it..." Yutaka explained.

Dawitsu walked up to the cook, "Hello there... hey, can I check out that paper?"

The Cook, a short, brown-haired woman in her thirties, replied with a simple, "Yeah, sure." and handed the newspaper to him.

As he read the front page, Dawitsu's face smiled from brim to brim, "Pfff... ha ha ha ha ha! That's... oh, that's so funny! A scandal involving Reimu! I can't wait to see her face when she reads this..."

After turning the pages, he continued to smile, until he came to page six. His expression suddenly became an embarrassed one in a noticeable enough manner for Yutaka to ask, "What's wrong?"

Yutaka attempted to see the article for herself, but Dawitsu held the paper out of Yutaka's reach, "No, you're not gonna see it, it's too..."

However, the children in the dinner room noticed this taking place, and one child said, "No fair! Let Miss Hadekawa read the newspaper!"

"Yeah, stop bullying her for her height!" a short child who related to Yutaka's problem added.

Dawitsu continued to hold the paper above his head, "No-can-do, kids..."

Yutaka thought for a moment, then decided to use her inexplicable popularity to her advantage, "Okay, kids... I want you to jump at Mr Dawitsu when I reach three..."

Dawitsu panicked, "Uh... no... don't, kids... I forbid you to do it!"

Yutaka smiled with confidence, "Okay... one... two..."

Dawitsu shook under pressure, but refused to give in.

Yutaka continued, "Two and a half... two and two-thirds... two and three-quarters..."

Her dragging out of the countdown was torturous to both Dawitsu and the children, so much so that finally Dawitsu gave up the newspaper without a fight.

Yutaka opened to page six, and read the headline: 'Mystery Two-timer Youkai Male revealed to be Mateyuu Dawitsu!' The sub-heading read 'Sources have seen him being with both Yukari Yakumo and an anonymous lover who's a close associate of the newspaper!'.

"Oh... well, Boss, I never knew this... so you really do like Yukari after all..." Yutaka joked.

Dawitsu turned red, and instantly lost composition, "Uh... you know that's not true! It was a misunderstanding when I was getting chocolate for your chocolate brownies! And... I don't know who this mystery woman is!"

"Oh, is that so... she said that he helped her rebuild her house, and encouraged her to find love... I know exactly who this is..." Yutaka tried to hold back a snicker, but in the end did so, "Oh, Boss, I don't feel so special any more..."

The children, after listening to their new favourite teacher deriding their least favourite teacher about love issues, began to chant, "Dawi and Yukari, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G! First comes love, second comes marriage, third comes a youkai in a baby's carriage!"

Dawitsu stormed out of the dining room, "That's it, I'm not hungry! Screw this, I'm out of here..."

Yutaka knew where her priorities lied. "Wait, Boss! Come back!"

Yutaka followed her Boss out of the lunch hall, and shouted, "Boss, wait!"

Dawitsu stamped his right foot once, and swivelled himself around, "Thanks a lot, Yutaka! I wish you didn't insist on taking in every piece of gossip you spot!"

Yutaka stopped going after her boss, and looked down in thought, "Yes... I'm... sorry about that, Boss..."

"Hell, the damage is done, now! Enjoy teaching the kids on your own, I give up! It's quite clear... AFTER ONE FRICKIN' DAY that the kids hate me..." Dawitsu seemed to ignore the apology.

"They... they don't hate you..."

"...easy for you to say! Go on, I've got stuff to do now that this libel's been published..." Dawitsu folded his arms and walked out of the building.

"Hold on! Boss, don't take..." Yutaka ran out of the building to try and stop him, but he was already in the sky by the time she'd caught up, "...revenge..."

As a furious, humiliated Dawitsu flew across the sky towards Youkai Mountain, a cautious, super-secret pair of Youkai agents were being dispatched from Youkai Mountain to find out the mystery man's name. The Mystery Man in question had no idea he was of interest at the time, and merely continued trying to recite spells at super speed in ENGLISH, no less... all the time while Marisa watched with pride.

Author's notes: Ugggggh... FIVE HOURS OF WRITING. CINQUE HEURES. CINCO HORAS. HAMASSU JAHASSAD. GO-JIKAN. (Dies)

Hello there... just let me know what you think, kay? I have a particular interest, or should I say, sympathy, with sufferers of motor neurone disease... a man I knew, Nick, died last year from it. He had a speaker, similarly to Stephen Hawking, but he couldn't operate it as well. And even though his face was permanently stuck in a smile, I could just... sense that he was frustrated when, upon wanting to ask for a book in Spanish, the machine translated it as 'Span Kish'. No-one knew what he meant, until I suggested 'Spanish'.

It's a horrible disease, and the fact that people like Stephen Hawking exist prove that the sufferer is very much aware of their predicament... they think EXACTLY like an able-bodied person, but are trapped in a non-functional body... it's... a horrible disease. Gladly, though, Hawking hasn't lost an ounce of his intelligence, and no doubt his disease motivates his ever more to become a great thinker of the world... for his mind is all his body has left...