Sergeant Johnson's New Gig

by Word Worthy

Avery Johnson has seen and survived it all. Covenant, Insurrectionists, the Flood. But after the betrayal of a certain insane Monitor leads to his death on the Ark, something extraordinary happens. By mysterious means, the one-man legend inexplicably finds himself alive and well in the beautiful magic-filled land of Equestria. What things await in store for him there?

4. A Grave Threat

Sergeant Major Avery Johnson was in some hot water, or to be more precise, hot snow. Much of the fine white powder was quickly turning to steam from the body heat of the enraged creature nearby.

Straight in front of him, stood the great ruby-scaled form of Risea, her mouth pulled into a sneer and her massive unfurled wings blotting out the view of the Sun from Johnson's angle. Behind them, Rainbow Dash had scarcely moved, never taking her eyes off the deadly needle-sharp arrowhead point of the dragon's tail.

Risea watched the human impatiently with narrowed eyes, hissing in a low and deadly cadence. Johnson held up a hand towards her, ever so cautiously. "The blue-winged horse is with me!" He said, reiterating himself. "We wouldn't be talking right now were it not for her. I'd probably just be a pancake decorating one of them spiky rocks out here!"

Johnson made a dramatic sweep of the surrounding environment with his arms. The dragon said nothing back, and instead snorted out a plume of smoke in response, indicating for him to continue.

"I don't know what nasty business your people might have or been having with Rainbow's people and vice versa, but a Princess by the name of Luna down there told me that some 'grave threats' are endangering your world." Sergeant Johnson then paused to light another cigar, on account of the cold climate. "Now, if its anything nearly as powerful as a legion of alien freaks, than I'm their man for the business of helping to put some of em' down for good."

At the mention of Luna, Risea oddly seemed to turn noticeably calmer. Her sneer slid away and her threatening posture diminished slightly. The rate of melting snow around the dragon had also declined significantly as she appeared distant and lost in thought. Risea's eyes seemed to take on a dreamy quality. "Luna...?" She murmured, peering back towards the shimmering gem horde in her den, ignoring both the pegasus and human. As if in a trance, the dragon inched her face further into the cavern mouth, turning her massive back to them and furling up her wings.

Noticing that the dragon had taken her attention off of him briefly, Johnson jogged around her bulky form and approached Rainbow Dash, snow crunching beneath the heavy foot fall of his boots. Dash's eyes registered something bordering the obscure area between relief, panic, anger, and frustration as she looked at him.

"Seriously Johnson, do you have a death wish?" The pegasus asked in exasperation. "This dragon is obviously loopy, she must have been up in this cave for Celestia knows how long! I say let's just take our chances and try to scale down this giant rock, maybe some other pegasi in Canterlot will spot us on the cliffs and get us down!"

Johnson raised an eyebrow. "You know, that could actually work! You got any rappel ropes...any climbing gear?"

"Uhh, well now that I think about it..." Rainbow Dash looked around helplessly.

"Well?" The Sergeant pressed on.

"I..."

Both of the human's eyebrows were now raised. "I can't hear you, soldier!"

"No." She admitted irritably. "But who needs it? Any safety gear beyond goggles and flight suits is for pansies. You have fingers, you could haul me down the rest of the way on your back or something, then we'll be even!" The Sergeant about spit out his cigar from the surprise of Dash's words.

He replied back as he coughed up tobacco fumes. "Ach...very...gah...funny. That sure would be a comical sight."

Rainbow glared at him skeptically, shuffling her hooves around and glancing at Risea's back spikes, each almost the size of a Royal Guard's spear, restlessly. "So uhh...you'll actually do it, then?"

"Lady, do I look like a comedian to you?" Dash shook her head. "Do I look like Superman?" She gave him a confused look. "I didn't think so soldier! I'm mean and I'm green, but even I have my limits. Now enough lip, Shiny-scales is our only way off this snowy hell."

Johnson put both index fingers to his mouth and whistled at Risea, catching her attention. The dragon continued to glare at Rainbow Dash, and the pegasus was happy to return the favor, but Risea did not have a hostile stance. When she looked at Johnson, her gaze actually fell neutral.

"Avery Johnson." Her silken voice echoed across the crags, boulders, and cliff faces, carrying all the way out to the vast horizon. "You should have mentioned you had made contact with Princess Luna. I had feared her still trapped within that accursed moon by her foolish sister. If you have indeed made dialogue with her, then that must mean she has been freed."

Cigar still in mouth, Johnson neared Risea's snout, much to Dash's alarm. He folded his arms and gazed stoically up at her. "Yeah, and from her tone of voice and word choice, I'd say plenty of good people must be down there fighting and getting hurt against something, and if I can help in anyway, I need to be down there, ma'am."

The ancient dragon blinked once at him, then replied, "Hmm, and what of the pegasi?" The word was like spoiled meat to Risea as she uttered it. Nevertheless, she continued on.

"Are they not the supreme warriors of Equestria?" At Johnson's side, Rainbow Dash nodded slowly, reluctant to acquiesce that her potential enemy was correct. "And what of the unicorns with their precious magics, and the earth ponies and their famed strength? Aren't they sufficient to keep their own realms safe?"

To this, Johnson could only shrug. "Hell if I know..." That was when a thought crossed his mind.

Quickly recovering, he then pointed a finger at her in an as-a-matter-of-fact gesture. "...butwhat I do know is this: No matter how strong, proud, or mean they can be...folks still need heroes from time to time. Something to give em' hope. Now Luna has apparently assumed that I fit the bill for the job. But by god if I don't, then I'll make it my point to track down the suckers who are!"

Johnson finished the cigar and tossed it to the ground, where it melted snow with a barely audible hiss. "Now, I'm not gonna pretend I know about your beef with the pegasi or what you may have been through; I'm not gonna say that I know how long you've been up here, cut off from your loved ones."

The ruby-scaled dragon blinked at him once more, twice in succession this time, apparently weighing the worth of the human's words.

"But right now, you could potentially be doing a service to the world at large, all it takes is for you to show a little damn tolerance for those ya don't like or may mistrust in the face of a common enemy. Trust me, I've been forced to work with my former enemies to save the day before, I know what it's like. But in the end, doing it makes everyone happy."

He finished by casually stomping his boot into the remaining snow on the slick stone platform. "Trust me on this one too: you'll like me when I'm happy!" Johnson flashed a toothy grin at the dragon.

For the first time since seeing Rainbow Dash, Risea chuckled. "Your words have stirred me, little one. If the world is as truly under threat as you and say, then on Luna's honor I will assist you off of my mountain. Do not expect any more than that from me, however. I have retreated from worldly affairs for very specific reasons."

Risea unfurled her wings and strode past Johnson and Rainbow Dash towards the platform edge with thundering footsteps. She let out a deep, loud sigh as she looked out over the land beyond, as well as the distant battlements and spires of Canterlot that beckoned below through mountain mists. "I will overlook the winged ground-trotter's presence just this once."

"Hey, I've got nothing against dragons, unless you give me a reason to!" Dash shouted at her.

Cerulean eyes turned to bore into the magenta of Rainbow Dash's own. "You are lucky to have a being so similar to that of the Legendary People of old as your companion, kin-of-dragon-slayers. His words have just secured you safe passage, so long as you keep your accursed wings at your sides."

The rainbow-maned pegasus rolled her eyes, now mostly devoid of any fear of the dragon. "Ugh, sure." Rainbow Dash tried to lift one of them in demonstration, and grimaced in pain. "No worries there."

Risea nodded firmly at her, and then lowered a wing for them to climb onto. "Ya senile old bag of scales." Rainbow concluded under her breath, following after Johnson.

"I may be over a millennium old, ground-trotter, but I am still in my adolescence. My hearing is as sensitive as fifty birds of prey." Risea retorted as she rolled her shoulders and shifted her wings into position. On her back, Rainbow Dash broke into a scowl, and Johnson nearly fell off as his laughter intensified.

"PREPARE YOURSELVES! We are descending to Canterlot, and no further!" The dragon declared, strutting towards the edge."You might want to hold onto something." Risea warned mischievously, as she bounded off the slick platform in a heartbeat.

"CRAAAPPPP!" Johnson roared as he was just barely able to grasp hold onto one of the dragon's back spikes. "This certainly beats the numerous times I been in a crashing pelican!" He remarked. "Damn were those things shot down so many friggin times!"

"Considering we're riding on a dragon, this is SO FREAKING AWESOME!" Rainbow cried out with foal-like glee. The frigid wind was whipping through her multi-colored mane almost comically. At any higher of an altitude, goggles would have been assuredly required to prevent damages to a flier's eyes.

At their speed, Risea had gotten them near enough to make out the Castle and highest towers of Canterlot in only two minutes. In another three, they were already hovering above the Castle Gardens.

Given their position, almost the entire capital city could see them.

As an inevitable result, several pegasi and unicorn guards were screaming at the tops of their lungs about an invasion or a dragon raid. War horns were being blown, stray aristocrats and other civilians were scattering in the winds like leaves, and ranks of Royal Guards were already forming up a defensive perimeter around the gardens and the walls towering over them.

Unicorns stood in orderly ranks of five stallions to each section of battlement, crossbows, javelins, and spells at the ready. A swarm of pegasi guards flew around the dragon, aiming crossbows and flintlock pistols, and drawing out wing blades from their sheaths at their sides. On the ground, a massive contingent of cannons, ballistas, and dozens of flintlock rifle-wielding earth ponies aimed up at Risea's towering form. Others affixed bayonets to the edge of their muskets and lined them up towards her like spears.

In response to their show of military defiance, the wind currents generating by Risea's undulating wings nearly blew many of the guards off their hooves, and many more still to nearly lose their crested helmets. The dragon growled quietly as the sun glinted off the vast array of gold and silver armor around her and reflected back into her eyes. The pegasi buzzing around her like flies threatened to throw her over the edge, but for the sake of her two riders, Risea kept tranquil for now.

Finally, after several tense moments of both sides exchanging wary glances, the ruby dragon landed. The force of her impact caused dozens of guards near her to stumble back and cry out.

Impatiently, a royal pegasus guard in rather distinctive gold armor with elaborate violet and silver trim stamped his hoof loudly as he emerged from the crowd of earth ponies. His coat was a rusty orange and his mane was blue judging by the crest atop his helmet. In one hoof he held a musket by its weirdly-designed stock and trigger housing over his shoulder. In the membranes of his wing on his opposite side, he grasped what appeared to be a scroll.

As Risea glared at the handsomely armored pegasus, Johnson gawked around at the strangely antiquated weapons, and their even stranger-looking wielders. On the other side of the spectrum of things, Rainbow Dash appeared as if she wanted to simply fly as far away from Canterlot as she possibly could.

Clearing his throat in a dramatic fashion, the pegasus finally addressed the unlikely trio. He spoke in a refined Canterlot accent that he had obviously been trained to use. "In the name of the Princesses, I Flash Sentry, Captain of the Royal Guard of Canterlot and a consultant within Her Majesty Princess Celestia's Army, etcetera, etcetera, hereby query of thee, what is your purpose for intruding upon our fair city, dragon?"

With a low rumble in her throat, Risea replied' "I am here to deliver unto you the hero your Princess Luna has summoned to our world, winged ground-trotter. Nothing more."

"And that...would be me!" Johnson declared, jumping off the dragon's side with a quick grunt. Rainbow Dash followed closely behind him, taking a neutral position away from either the dragon or any of the guards.

Flash Sentry beheld the sight of the human in his UNSC-issued BDU, heavy boots, and bemused grin. Sentry frowned at him in confusion. "I...don't understand. There was no mention of any hero of any kind being summoned by anyone in the Court."

"That is because, fair Captain, it is all under our jurisdiction, not the Guard's." A regal voice declared from a nearby entryway. Everyone turned their heads towards it. The sunlight gleamed brilliantly on the ground in sharp contrast to the newcomer and her midnight-colored fur as she and her Night Guards made their way past the artillery towards where Johnson and the others stood. If the appearances of Rainbow Dash and the denizens of Canterlot were enough to make Sergeant Johnson gawk and stare in confusion, the appearance of the alicorn now approaching made his jaw nearly drop to the floor. His cigar, another one he had managed to light sometime on their flight to the city, fell from his mouth to the flagstones.

"Good day to you, Sergeant Major Avery Johnson." Princess Luna greeted with a warm smile. The Princess of the Night's smile formed into a grin as she took in the human's facial expression. "What dost thou think of our true form then?"

After a few more seconds of awkward gawking, Johnson finally replied, "Your hair...your, your mane...IT FRIGGIN FLOATS!" He exclaimed in astonishment, picking his cigar back up and brushing it off. "Where can I get hair like that?"

Luna giggled mischievously back at him. "Oh? Pray tell, that is the strangest thing about us you've seen all day? Our flowing mane?" She trotted closer to him and held out a hoof. "Allow us to formally introduce ourselves." Johnson used one arm to put the cigar back in his mouth, and the other to shake Luna's hoof, chuckling all the while as she continued her introduction.

"You stand before Princess Luna, Diarch of the Kingdom of Equestria. We rule these lands..." Luna gestured towards everything around her with her other foreleg. "...alongside our sister, the Princess of the Sun, Celestia."

Smiling back at her, Johnson broke his grip with Luna's hoof. "It's a pleasure, Princess, a darn pleasure." Still smiling, Johnson turned in Risea's direction. "Well what do ya know Risea, I've been in the presence of royalty, two times in one day!" Risea remained silent as she looked first to him, then training her gaze on Luna, before replying.

"She is more royal than I. It is an honor to be in your presence once again after so long, oh great daughter of the night." The dragon proclaimed, inclining her head slightly to convey her respects.

The Princess noted the dragon's focus on her, and Luna turned to bear her regal gaze upon Risea's red reptilian face. "Dost thou know us personally from somewhere, fire-breather most fair?" She inquired with curiosity. "My memory jars me, dragon Risea."

Risea gazed around at the Guards with distaste, then looked back to Luna with a knowing smile. "I remember you, Princess Luna, but you do not remember me." At that, the massive dragon immediately spread her wings and began to take flight. "Until next our paths cross, Avery Johnson." She called out.

Johnson waved at her as she went. "Later, shiny-scales!" She roared back in reply to him.

Suddenly, Flash Sentry stirred into motion, beckoning to catch Luna's attention. "Your Majesty, should we...Umm, she's getting away! Do we have to..."

A single hoof raised in the air cut his sputtering short. "Nay, Captain Sentry. Put all of your guards at ease. The dragon is of no threat to us." Luna then looked to the earth ponies and their artillery nearby. "And get the Army contingent back into thine garrison. Such a massive display of force is an unbecoming way to greet our fine guests!"

"Erm, yes of course, Your Highness." Sentry bowed, and with a single shout, the defenders immediately began cleaning up and filing out. Only the Princess' Night Guards held position at her sides. Luna sighed, satisfied, then finally noticed Rainbow Dash staring at them nearby.

"Hail, Rainbow Dash! What brings thee to Canterlot?"

Dash's eyes widened as all attention was drawn to her. Bowing her head curtly, she responded, "Oh, hiya Your Majesty!" Rainbow Dash chuckled nervously.

"Were you tagging along with Sergeant Johnson on his journey here?" Luna asked with her brow raised inquisitively.

Rainbow continued her nervous laugh. "Umm, yeah about that... It's a long story..."

"We are listening..." Luna began.

"I kinda...hurt my wings carrying something heavy. Let's just leave it at that."

Luna looked to the pegasus with concern. "Rainbow Dash, you are a friend of PrincessTwilight Sparkle. As such, you need not ask if you require medical attention for any reason!"

"Uhh, no it's not...Its just that...I can fly now, it should be good in a few days." Rainbow replied, sputtering and downplaying her injuries. She was now hovering in the air with a little difficulty as Luna and Johnson both stared at her with bizarre faces. Rainbow pointed a hoof over her shoulder. "I uh, I gotta go now Your Majesty, if ya don't mind."

"We don't...mind." Luna replied slowly and awkwardly.

Rainbow Dash smiled at both of them and she gave a brief waved to the Sergeant. "I'll see you around, Johnson. Feel free to look me and my friends up if you're ever around Ponyville, I'm sure Pinkie Pie would get a kick out of ya!" Johnson took a puff of his cigar and waved back as Rainbow got ready to go.

"Will do Rainbow. Keep your eyes sharp in the skies, soldier!" Dash saluted him before zooming off.

Watching the retreating forms of Risea and Rainbow Dash above them, Luna looked to Johnson with a bemused expression as the midday sun continued to shine brightly over them. In the surrounding area, guards went about their work, and the occasional aristocrat decided it was safe enough to resume their stroll or meetings with one another.

"Just what happened up there on the summit? Thou hath managed to defeat a fire breather not with sword but with wit and tongue alone, Sergeant Johnson? And I see you've made some friends here already. We've just met, and already you are proving quite resourceful." Luna proclaimed with astonishment.

Sergeant Johnson put a hand to his hip, and used the other to rub at his head. "Yeah, it comes with my trade I suppose." His latest cigar finally burned out and he then fumbled for a new one in one of his pouches.

"Ah damn, that was ma last one! Oh, and they're just acquaintances by the way, although on the battlefield, the line between buddy and stranger can become quite blurry at times, especially when one's a friggin dragon, and the other is a pony with wings! Which reminds me..."

Luna smiled at him, but this time, hiding behind it lied a thick fog of worry. "You would like to know now why we called you here, why we chose to preserve your essence and reconstruct it in our world, correct?" Smiling, he pointed the spent cigar at her, then flicked it onto the flagstones.

"Bingo, Princess."

The Princess of the Night nodded, and motioned with her hoof towards the door she and her guards had just entered through. "Come, I will explain everything to you in the Royal Archives after we have introduced you to our sister."

Flanked by both bat-winged Night Guards, Luna and Johnson made their way into the Palace. Passing by Captain Flash Sentry, the pegasus smiled at Johnson, and in his normal-non Canterlot voice said, "Hey, where can I get some awesome armor like yours?"

Johnson chuckled, only glancing at him for a moment. "Get to Mars, soldier. See a Misriah Armory representative, they should be able to suit you up in some of the finest, snazziest combat armor in the 'verse." He chuckled again, as Sentry sat and watched him go with nothing but pure confusion and astonishment etched on his face.

As they entered the building, Johnson took a look at the bat-pony guards who were beside him and the Princess. Within easy reach of their wings, were twin flintlock pistols with a ebony stocks strapped in holsters. Beside each pistol was a small wing blade shaped similarly to a bat's own wings.

"Nice wings and guns, gentlemen." He remarked. Both were silent, but nodded politely at him. He was also about to comment on the sheer lavishness of the inside of the Castle, but they soon entered into a room and the inhabitants within cut his words short. Another alicorn, taller than Luna with a white coat smiled warmly as the two entered.

"Hello Luna. Oh, and you must Avery Johnson! It is a sincere privilege to be in such pleasant company as yourself, Sergeant Major." She proclaimed, approaching him with genuine interest. "As I'm sure you know by now, I am Princess Celestia."

Still not quite use to the rather otherworldly nature of the Princesses, Johnson couldn't help but feel some shards of awe at the appearance of Celestia. The awe was especially overwhelming when one was viewing both sisters at once. Kicking in his Marine discipline to contain his own awe, Johnson put on a largely serious face and folded his arms behind his back.

"The pleasure is all mine, ma'am. It's a damn fine honor to be alive and kicking again!" Luna grinned at him, and Celestia's warm smile was unchanged as she continued to analyze the human. "So, to feed my stingy sense of self-curiosity, just where, or what, do you two know me from?"

Celestia sighed and closed her eyes, while Luna's pleasant gaze hardened as she produced a small object from the table next to her with the cobalt aura of her telekinesis. To Johnson's mortification, it resembled a human skull. Luna levitated it closer to Johnson, tilting the crown of the skull towards him and revealing a symbol carved into the thick of the bone.

"Is that a... Does that symbol represent a strand of DNA?" Johnson inquired. Celestia nodded, and ignited her horn, creating an image of something tall and, for Johnson, quite ridiculous looking. The creature had a serpentine body with various mismatched limbs.

"What the hell is that?"

"This, is a creature known as a Draconequus. To be more specific, Discord: self-proclaimed 'Master of Chaos'." Celestia explained. "He was responsible for plunging this world into chaos and misery over a millennium ago."

Luna then stepped in. "Until very recently, we had thought him reformed after Fluttershy, a friend of your acquaintance Rainbow Dash, convinced him of the worthiness of our land in its current harmonious state. But that was before this!" She motioned a hoof towards the strange skull.

Johnson scoffed, eager to get to the point. "So, what about this skull? What's a human noggin' doing in a dimension separate from mine? I assume no humans live here, do they? I haven't seen any running around."

"Not that we know of at all, Sergeant. Although...there are old tales of a long-lost species with bone structures said to resemble this skull. The Legendary Folk they were called. But, as their name suggests, it's all likely just a myth." Celestia replied.

"This skull appeared almost at the same time that Discord disappeared two weeks ago, and numerous guards began acting...strange. We found the skull wrapped up in this note, here. It contains information that lead us to you, as well as other clues." The Princess levitated a small sheet of parchment over to him.

Holding it in his hands, Johnson frowned and read it.

IWHBYD

Attention Dear Princesses Celestia and Luna:

I regret to inform that for personal reasons, (all my own) I must take leave of our originally agreed-upon truce as well as my promise to continue to exist in my 'reformed' state.

You see, a grandiose game has been set in motion here on our world by two old friends of mine, and it is far too exciting for a fellow such as I to pass up. Enjoy this rather 'bony' token of my affection. A little farewell gift, if you will. You may find it as a 'skeleton' key to your hearts. It is also a taste of the 'grave' threats to come.

Anyway, jokes aside, expect more of these little buggers to 'pop up' from time to time around Equestria. This skull is merely the first piece on the metaphorical game board. My, oh my this should be a hoot!

Oh, and did I forget to mention? To play the game properly, we need someone from outside this world, some poor chap about to bite the dust, a former hero without a cause to fight for any longer! This little beauty of a magical skull, simply called 'I would have been your daddy' should help you divine who this individual is. But act quickly, for his time is soon short of his mortal shell! You dear sisters wouldn't want him to die in his world without your intervention and lose the game now, would you?

Time is of the essence, for the game beckons, and the Caesar is only so patient with my shenanigans in Roam before he finally snaps like a twig and does something...diplomatically rash!

Sincerely mine,

-Discord

"What in sweet Auntie Marcille's name did I just read? It sounds like the guy who wrote this was hopped up on one of them drugs those Grunts used to throw in their methane tanks!" Johnson looked at both alicorns with confusion.

This time, Luna sighed and looked at the floor, while Celestia walked up to a map of the world near one of the many shelves laden with dusty old tomes. "We theorize, Sergeant, that Discord has fled Equestria, and has based himself somewhere in an empire across the ocean to our East.

Pointing a hoof at several chains of islands rimming a medium-sized continent, Celestia continued. "The Roaman Empire, the greatest nation of the zebras...If we can't find some way to put a stop to whatever Discord and his friends' insane plans are, the Roaman Caesar will have no other option but to take matters into his own hooves, as Discord tears their lands apart."

Luna returned her gaze to Johnson, and approached him. "Indeed, the zebras have already closed down thine embassy naught but two days ago, claiming they are urgently needed."

She the laid a wing on the Sergeant's armored soldier. "This strange skull lead us to you, Sergeant Johnson. As confusing as it may be, you are somehow needed. For if Equestria and Roam were to go to war, the sheer chaotic energy generated by the fighting would make Discord–and those allied with him, nigh unstoppable. No nation on this world would be able to resist or fight them for long."

For a while, Johnson was quiet. He stared at Luna's worried face thoughtfully, pondering all the new information. Finally, after several moments of thick silence, he replied.

"This 'Discord', he reminds me of Truth, that cocky bastard. Tell you what, I help you all stop this freak of nature's activities in Equestria, and you promise to make me a new hat, alright?"

Celestia looked at him incredulously. "That is all that you request from us in return, truly?"

"Truly. Oh yeah, and get me somewhere cozy to sleep. You do that for me, and the good Sarge will take the gig!"

Luna beamed with delight, much of her worry alleviated for now. "That is wonderful to hear Johnson! But, if you are to for any reason fail to prevent his acts here in Equestria..."

Johnson interjected. "...then we'll have a war on our hands, I know. If it comes to that, no need to fear Princess. With my knowledge from my many days in the Corps, I can whip up just about any sorry-ass excuse for a group of soldiers, into a proper, ass-kicking machine!"

"Remember, every enemy is tough. But invincible?" The Sergeant chuckled malevolently. "Well, I've been down that road before. At the end of the day, our big green..." Johnson paused and briefly stared at the armor of Luna's Nightguards. "Erm...Our big silver-and-gold style, CANNOT BE DEFEATED!"