Blame it on the Hormones
Chapter 3- Dream On
"Ash, wake up! It's time to go!!" Mrs. Ketchum's voice rang out shrilly.
Ash stirred from slumber and slowly opened his eyes. Everything was still blurry. Mrs. Ketchum came walking into the room to once again try to rouse the slumbering trainer.
"C'mon, sleepyhead. You've got an appointment for a haircut, and then we've got some clothes shopping to do, so get up!"
"Ohkay, ohkay...." Ash mumbled groggily as he finally climbed out of bed. The next few minutes were a blur, and before he knew it, the haircut approached. Something wasn't right, though. The place they were heading for didn't look like a barber shop....it looked like a salon.
"Mom, why are going here?" came the question.
"Oh, don't worry, sweetie, they'll do a wonderful job!" Mrs. Ketchum replied perkily.
They stepped inside, and he was quickly whisked away by an equally perky hairstylist whose nametag read "Natasha". Before he knew it, his head was being rinsed and shampooed in a freezing vat of cold water.
Shivering, he was led to the stylist's chair and joined again by his mother. The conversation was almost too perky to listen to, but he managed to catch the drift. It soon turned alarming.
"Alright, ma'am, what kind of style do you want for Ash here? Such beautiful hair, we can do almost anything with it." Natasha cooed. Mrs. Ketchum giggled.
"Well, I think we should leave that up to Ash. What do you choose, sweetie? Layers? Maybe a perm? Something short?
"Psh, that's easy" he thought.
"I choose...." the words caught in his mouth, and he hesitated. He had just gotten a close glimpse at the mirror, which seemed to suddenly shine brighter. How had he not seen this before? His black hair, wet and shiny from the rinsing, hung down far below his shoulder blades. It looked different, like, like......girl's hair. A familiar sense of dread came over him.
"Oh, fuck......"
Before that thought could be finished, a knock on the door jolted Ash, and he awoke with a start. It was still dark, and hard to see, so he wildly searched about for his bearings. The door opened, and two shadowy figures appeared. What little light that slid through the door revealed a bed, lightly painted walls, and polished white floors, and he remembered that he was in the hospital. He vaguely recalled coming here and falling asleep last night (or was it this night? He had no idea what time it was...), but that was about it. Hesitantly, he called out to the two figures at the door.
"H-hello....?"
The lights flicked on, and two female nurses stood before him. They looked, to be honest, a bit weird. One had bright orange hair that almost had to have been a wig of some sort (as well as an inflatable bra, unbeknownst to Ash), while the other had red hair pulled up in a bun that looked strangely familiar, for some reason....
The red-haired one spoke first.
"Why, hello there, Patient Twerp, er, um, Ketchum." She smiled. "We've come to give you a checkup!"
"Yes, that's right." Squealed the orange-haired one in an impossibly whiny falsetto that made Ash's ears hurt. "We're here to harm, I mean make sure that nothing else harms you!"
"And in your condition, we certainly want to make sure that you don't get harmed by any Pokemon- You need your rest after all!" wheedled the redhead.
"So we're going to help you feel better by removing all of the Pokemon from this room so you can get your rest!" squealed the orangehead, making Ash cringe once again.
"So just hand over your Pokemon, and we'll be on our way." the redhead remained cheery.
Ash searched for his pokeballs and Pikachu, and saw signs of neither. "Umm...my Pokemon aren't here....."Ash replied groggily.
The nurses looked ashen. They huddled together, whispering angrily.
"I thought Meowth said that Pikachu would be here for the taking!" snapped Jessie.
"I thought so, too!" replied James.
"Ooh, I'm going to kill that mangy little-"
Her whispering was cut off abruptly by a large two large hands. One clamped down on the should of each "nurse".
"Well, there you are!" Doctor Schocter sounded genial. "I've been looking all over for a couple of nurses, and here they are! I see you're checking in on this patient. Is he doing well?"
They nodded nervously.
"Good to hear! In that case, time to get back to work! Mr. Ellers needs his bedpan changed in 205, and Mrs. Everett's due for a sponge bath in 211! Chop chop!"
"But, but...." James feebly protested.
"No buts about it!" Doctor Schocter proclaimed, dragging the two stunned "nurses" out of the room. He shut the lights off on his way out, and a confused Ash quickly fell back asleep.
The day was bright and sunny, and the ocean water beckoned invitingly as the sandy beach sparkled in the sun. In a nearby changing room, Ash found himself a bit confused. He found himself holding a small yellow piece of fabric with spots all over it.
"Misty, what exactly are we up to again?" he asked loudly, though she was only in the next stall over.
"Seriously, Ash, weren't you listening?" she snapped. "It's a beautiful day! We're going to get our asses out there on the beach and enjoy it!"
"Then what's with this little piece of fabric? It's not big enough for a towel." He whined.
Misty rolled her eyes. "Ash, we talked about this. It's an itsy-bitsy-teeny-weenie yellow polka-dot bikini. We're all wearing them today."
"Even Brock?" he asked incredulously.
Misty snorted, unable to hide her disgust any longer. "No, not Brock, you idiot. Just us girls."
Us girls?
Ash looked down.
Oh, right. Those things again. Damn....
A ray of sunshine hit Ash's face, and he stirred once again. He opened up his eyes, and a flash of light temporarily blinded him. He could hear Brock and Misty talking nearby. Misty! That's right, he needed to talk to her about this bikini thing....he didn't really want to do it.
"Misty....I don't think I wanna wear a bikini....." His speech still sounded groggy.
Misty couldn't help but giggle- the statement was so absurd, she just couldn't keep a straight face.
"Ash, I think you're dreaming again." she smirked. "Trust me, I don't think any of us would want to see you in a bikini."
"Whuh?" Ash blinked a few times, and his surroundings came into clearer view. He was once again back in the hospital room, and it was most definitely morning.
"Oh....another dream", he thought. That was weird....
Brock and Misty were standing nearby, and they were joined by a very excited Pikachu. Upon seeing Ash wake up, the Pokemon jumped up onto the bed to see him.
"Pika pi!" the rodent happily squealed.
"Hey, buddy, good to see you" Ash hugged his friend.
"Cha!"
"So, how do you feel this morning, Ash?" Brock asked, snapping Ash's attention back towards the two humans in the room. Ash hadn't thought about it until Brock said something, but, come to think of it, his stomach did feel better.
"Well, actually, a lot better...My stomach doesn't seem to hurt today, and I think I feel okay."
He held back from discussing the weird dreams, however. There had been three last night- Two that had involved him being a girl, and a really weird one where he thought he had seen Team Rocket dressed up in bad nurse's costumes trying to steal his Pokemon. Better not to mention that for the moment.
"Well, good to hear", said Brock. "The doctor says that you should be fine, and you probably got some sort of food poisoning from something, maybe all of those berries you eat."
Misty shot an "I told you so" look at Ash, and Ash, whose brain was finally beginning to wake up, stuck his tongue out at her.
After a pause, Ash opened his mouth again. "So, then…am I going to be stuck here for the rest of the day?"
"Doesn't look like it to me!" There came the booming voice of Dr. Schocter, surprising everybody as he walked into the room straight and erectly, with a doctor's air of confidence. "Your vital signs look good, and it seems like you're feeling well, so as soon as we get you some breakfast, you and your friends can be on your way. "
Ash smiled, and at the same time, his stomach growled. "Yeah….I'd say breakfast sounds good."
"Just make sure you don't overdo it again, like the berry incident" deadpanned Doctor Schoctor. Ash smiled, everyone in the room had a chuckle, and the day was off to a great start.
A short time later, with some breakfast in hand, the trio was back on their feet, and ready to leave the hospital. The doctor escorted them towards the door, though he pulled Brock aside just before the exit.
"Now, I've sent away those berries for tests. Shouldn't be any issue and whatnot, but those types of berries aren't usually intended for human consumption, so try and make sure he stays away from stuff like that in the future."
"Will do." Brock replied. "The way he eats sometimes, you'd swear he thinks he's got the stomach of a Steelix. Thanks much for your help, doctor."
"Not a problem. We'll contact you if there's anything important you need to know about those berries. You have a cellular phone, yes?"
"Of course." Brock gave him the number, and with a handshake, he rejoined the trio outside the building, and they went on their way.
The town of Cypress City was oddly-named. There were no Cypress trees in the surrounding forest, and no Cypress trees in the city itself. Instead, rows and rows of three-and-four story apartments buildings and businesses lined the neat, tidy streets. It was a busy city, but there just wasn't a lot to do if you were a Pokemon trainer, a fact that wasn't lost on Ash.
"So, then, what exactly is our plan? There's no gym in this city, right?"
Misty rolled her eyes and muttered under her breath. Brock was kinder.
"That's true," he noted "but this town is known for its harbor. We need to catch the ferry here and head over towards Sprucecove Town, because that's the starting point for the rest of the journey- four more badges to go still, after all."
Ash ran his fingers absentmindedly over his badge pouch, which already had four completed badges. "I still don't get why a league would be set up that way", he noted.
"Well," Brock continued "if I remember correctly, there were two small countries that wanted to host their own Pokemon League, but neither had enough big cities to pull it off on their own, so they joined together to form a league."
"Well, I suppose not everyplace can be a Kanto or Johto, huh?" Ash countered.
That was true. Badge quests out here weren't as easy as they had been in Kanto, with its neatly spaced towns and well-groomed walking routes and trails. But Kanto had been conquered, which was why new challenges abounded for the trainer. Challenges that usually involved longer, less-traveled journeys between cities.
"Right, Ash. At any rate, that means we have to take a long boat ride to get there."
"Funny you remember all of that without a map, Brock" Misty bantered playfully. (Brock, after all, had lost the previous map.) He simply glared back at her before continuing. "We also need to buy some supplies and food, so we can avoid getting lost again. So the next stop is the store."
Conveniently, they had arrived at a pokemon-themed department store (one of the few resources for trainers in Cypress City). While they shopped away, others in the town weren't having such a good day.
Two exhausted nurses slumped down in a break room at the Cypress City hospital. They had been working non-stop since about 4 in the morning, and they were bushed. The red-headed one fidgeted nervously. "James, we should make a break for it while he's not looking!" she hissed.
The orange-haired one adjusted "her" very fake torso ever so slightly before responding back in a trademark whine. "Jessie, I can't….I'm so tired, I don't think I even have the energy. That doctor won't let us out of his sights long enough to escape!"
"Well, think of something! The twerp is getting away, off to who-knows-where right now!" she hissed back.
Before he could respond, both nurses were once again alerted to the presence of Doctor Schoctor. "All right, you two, time to get back to work! Mr. Willis in Room 208 has had an accident, and I need you two to clean up after him."
The nurses slunk off silently. They sighed. "Looks like Team Rocket's cleaning up again….."
Outside, the sun continued to shine brightly, and the unmistakable scent of the ocean permeated the many docks down by the marina. Ash, Misty, and Brock had had a successful lunch and shopping trip, and with supplies in hand, they were ready to leave this land and hand onward to the next.
Once they had found the ferry service that they thought they needed, they walked up to the window. Brock led off, as always.
"Three tickets to Sprucecove Town, please"
"Sure thing! Your timing couldn't have been more perfect!" replied the smiling brunette behind the counter.
Brock could have floated away. She was so beautiful. "No, my dear, perfect….perfect is what you are. Such a perfect flower of a wom-OW!"
Misty had yanked him by the ear, dragging him away. "Damnit, Brock, I thought we talked about this!". Some things never changed.
The brunette sweatdropped, the continued. "At any rate, the next boat leaves in 45 minutes! It'll take about six hours to arrive in Sprucecove Town, so I'm afraid you won't be able to set out from there today, but you'll get dinner on the boat tonight, and there are plenty of places to stay the night in Sprucecove Town."
"Sounds great!" shouted Misty, as she continued to hold Brock at bay.
Ash handed her some money, procured the tickets, and they were on their way. 45 minutes went by quickly and without incident, and soon they were on the S.S. Essex, headed across the seas. Ocean spray floated all around the passengers as they took to the deck, and watched Cypress City fade into the distance. The sun was shining, and a new adventure awaited.
On the deck of the boat, Misty couldn't help but smile. "Great day for a boat ride".
"Sure is!"
"Uh-huh!"
"Pika-pi!!!" The exuberant Pokemon's cries made everyone smile.
"Couldn't have said it better myself, Pikachu" grinned Ash.
What a fine day, indeed.
End Chapter 3
Author's Notes: I took a, uh, slight break between chapter. No guarantees when the next chapter will drop, but this project is by no means dead.