The Dark 4

I'm sitting by a small stream in the shade of a large tree. My eyes are closed, fingers laced under my head as I let the suns warmth wash over me, easing some of the tension I've been building. Eve and Gabrielle have retreated off to the woods to see if they can't figure something out. I'm easing myself into this whole thing, and I refuse to believe that I can't get my old Gabrielle back. Soon the sun lulls me to sleep.

'Xena?' Her voice is tentative.

'Hmmm?' I cross my legs, leaning back against the tree. The day has been exceptionally hot so I decided we could make camp a bit early.

'Can I ask you something?'

'Depends on what it is.' I pick up a piece of straw and start picking at my teeth.

'Do you think we'll ever be more than friends?' I choke when she asks this, throwing the straw to the ground as I try and regain my composure.

'What?' She turns her body to face me, legs still tucked under her.

'You know what I mean.' There seems to be a boldness in her that I never thought possible. 'Are we going to keep pretending that we just want to be friends?' I rub my face roughly as I contemplate the answer to that particular question.

'Gabrielle.' I sigh. 'That is something that should be thought about very carefully.'

'Why?' Her eyes narrow.

'Because the ramifications. The fact that we can never be what you could have had with Perdicus.' I throw my hands up in exhaustion.

'What do you mean by that?'

'I mean, I can never give you a family, and while I can protect you I will also be the reason you're in trouble in the first place. Not to mention, women together is illegal in many areas. Now if we were men it would be different.' She places her hand lightly on my thigh. There's a glimmer of hope in her eyes despite my pessimism.

'Xena. All I want is to be with you. Whatever that means, I accept the consequences just as I do every day.'

'Gabrielle..' I'm stopped by her lips gently brushing against mine. The kiss is soft and searching; a question being answered. After a minute she pulls away, grabbing my hand and bringing it to her chest.

'This doesn't need to be questioned.' I can feel the beat of her heart beneath my palm. 'This tells you everything you need to know.' I can't help but feel afraid of the danger that could descend upon her. 'I love you.' She whispers. My walls come crashing down, all doubts rush away as our lips meet again.

I wake up to Argo nudging me with her nose. It's wet and slimy, and completely not what I want in my face right now.

'You are impatient.' I rub her side and readjust the saddle. 'Come on girl, we need to get home.'

Eve is sitting on the bench in front of the house when I get back. She's been waiting for me obviously, and her look is pensive.

'Let me take care of Argo.' I jerk my head towards the barn, she simply nods acknowledgment. Her disposition is starting to make me worry. What happened? It takes me half an hour before I'm finished, but Eve is still sitting on the bench when I leave the barn.

'I take it, it didn't go well.' I sit down next to her; the tension in her body is obvious.

'I'm afraid for her.'

'Why?'

'She still has a chance, but…'

'What do you mean she has a chance?'

'Mother, she has to be the one to defeat the darkness within her. There is nothing we can do; no God's can help us.' She looks at me sadly.

'What about your God?' She shakes her head at me.

'That is how I know she is the only solution. But that is all he can do for me.' Running my hand through my hair, I sigh.

'Do you think it's possible?' I already feel defeated.

'Yes of course.' Eve practically yells. 'We cannot give up on her mother.' I can sense there's something else she isn't telling me.

'What else?'

'What?' She attempts a look of confusion, but it's a weak attempt.

'What aren't you tell me?' Her head drops for a second, then she sighs and looks off into the horizon.

'She said some things. She's angry.'

'About what?' I'm almost afraid to ask. 'Me?'

'She wanted things to be different. She wishes that you would have let her be more of a parent to me. She gave up everything for me and you but….she still feels like she's on the outside.' Shit. I've secretly known this but I've never made an attempt to fix it.

'I know.' I feel guilty.

'Mother, why did you ignore her feelings?' Eve is looking at me as if I'm the worst person in the world. I am.

'Because it was easier. I figured I'd take care of it when she brought it up. She just never brought it up.' I shrug.

'You are such an idiot sometimes.' She mumbles.

'Hey, don't talk to your mother like that.' The voice startles us both. Somehow Gabrielle has come up behind us without a sound. There's a slight smile on her face, her eyebrow cocked up.

'Been there long?' I try to grin. She just shrugs, cocking her head to one side. 'I'm sorry.'

'No. Look, I just needed to get it out.' She looks towards Eve. 'I'm sorry Eve, I shouldn't have said all that.' There's a trace of regret in her voice.

'We will get through this.' I stand, pulling her towards me in a hug. 'The three of us will get through this.' Her body relaxes against me as she wraps her arms around my waist.

'Please don't give up on me.' Her voice is nearly inaudible as she whispers against my chest.

'Never.'