Disclaimer: I do not own Law & Order SVU or any of its characters. Dick Wolf does. This story is solely for fun, practice, and hopefully someone's entertainment. I only own this story and any characters I create. Running up that Hill owned by Placebo.

A/N: I did something different with chapter. I have added the song lyrics from Running up that Hill by Placebo in italics to reflect the undercurrent of Olivia and Elliot's discussion. I wanted readers to picture that song in the background as they read this chapter. Let me know what you think. As always thank you for taking the time to read my story.

Season 14 The Comeback

First there are discussions then there are crucial conversations…

Elliot stared in stunned amazement at the person at his door. "Liv?"

"Hi El," Olivia whispered in a voice that sounded un-natural even to her ears. She swallowed hard taking in the first sight of her former partner in over a year.

Elliot stood there blocking the entrance way filling it up not just with his positioning but his presence as well. He leaned against the door frame with one hand on the upper half and his hip leaned against the other side.
Olivia saw the look of surprise and something she couldn't quite define quickly cross his face before a slow smile settled on his full mouth, a cocky smirk that Olivia was more than familiar with. Olivia didn't fail to notice that despite Kathy's concerns regarding Elliot's drinking that he looked great. Her eyes first connected with his arm, well- muscled and toned on display as he blocked the doorway. He was wearing a white tee shirt pulled snuggly against his chest and low slung jeans that hung casually at his waist his feet barefoot. Olivia forced her gaze back to his face. The biggest change was the beard. He had at least a four day growth of facial hair giving him a darker almost predatory look. Olivia swallowed hard feeling his perusal of her body one that was much slower than hers had been.
Elliot was stunned to see Olivia at his door. He couldn't hide his surprise or the unexpected rush of happiness that filled him but he quickly reined it in. Instead, he indulged his want letting his eye's feast hungrily on her knowing it would make her nervous and on guard which is what he wanted.
Olivia's nervousness increased as Elliot continued to look at her with that predatory look not speaking. "Can I come in?" Olivia asked forcing herself to sound more assured than she actually was.

Elliot was silent as he smiled and dropped his arm from the door frame leaving her just enough room to slide by him their bodies almost touching in the exchange of space.

Olivia walked into the short hallway staring at the open living room to her right, her heart pounding in her ears. She turned back to Elliot half expecting him to still be in the doorway surprised to find him directly behind her. "So how have you been?" Olivia asked her voice struggling not to belie her nervousness.

"How have I been?" Elliot repeated his eyebrow rose in question. "That is not really what you came to ask is it?"

Olivia shook her head.

"Why are you here, Olivia?" Elliot asked bluntly.

Olivia nervously licked her lips as Elliot failed to budge from his spot his eyes fixed on her.

"Aren't you going to say anything?" Elliot laughed. "You want me to say it. Someone told you to visit. Poor Elliot, he just isn't coping well."

Olivia opened her mouth then closed it the expression on his face telling her it was better not to say anything at this juncture in the conversation.

Elliot stepped back from her. "Sit," He walked into the kitchen.

Olivia looked at the couch and reluctantly walked into living room to take a seat.

Elliot reappeared a minute later with two bottles of beer. He handed one to her.

Olivia not entirely sure of her footing in this situation took the beer and just stared at it. She looked up and watched as Elliot downed half of his in one swallow.

"Isn't that what they told you, poor Elliot," Elliot looked to her for confirmation.

"El," Olivia started sitting the beer bottle down on the coffee table.

"What I want to know is why you bothered after all this time?" Elliot said his eyes capturing hers.

"I wanted to know how you were. I wanted to know that you're okay." Olivia replied unable to tear her gaze from Elliot's.

"You don't want to know how I am," Elliot said bluntly.

It doesn't hurt me. You wanna feel how it feels. You wanna know; know that it doesn't hurt me. You want to hear about the deal I am making.

"Yes, yes I do." Olivia said her voice earnest.

"I'm fine, Olivia." Elliot spat out.

Olivia stood up. "No, you're not. Elliot, please let me help." She implored.

You. Do you really know about hell?

"You really want to know. You want to know what it is like to wake up knowing every day that you killed an innocent girl. A girl your own daughter's age, do you really want to know what that feels like, Liv?" Elliot glared at her.

Olivia felt the tears building. "El, I am so sorry. I want to know. I want to help if I can. If I could change it I would.

If I only could make a deal with God get him to swap our places. I would be running up that road. Running up that hill. If I only could.

"You can't," Elliot said his voice filled with anger and sorrow. "I wish you could. I wish you had never brought her back in. I wish you had never told her those men where there."

You don't want to hurt me. See how deep the bullet lies. Unaware that I am tearing you asunder.

Olivia's eyes widened in shock and horror, a sick feeling settling into her stomach. "You blame me?"

"Yes," Elliot said knowing it was the one thing that would make her run, hurt her, get her away from here and allow him to stop his own hurting.

A single tear slid down Olivia's face quickly followed by another.

"I don't need your late sympathy, Olivia." Elliot said his own heart breaking a little.

"I am sorry," Olivia choked out. "I never meant for that to happen. God, if I could change that day Elliot I would."

"You can't."

"Please," Olivia reached over placing her arm on his. "Please let me help, whatever you need."

Elliot hated to see her apologizing for something that wasn't even her fault. He was crumbling with every tear that marred her beautiful face. He could not let her in it would hurt in ways he could not even begin to comprehend so he did the only other thing he could think of to push her away, to push the pain back. "Whatever I need, huh?"

Olivia nodded her heart now at gallop seizing hope in the opportunity to help Elliot and assuage her own guilt over Jenna. "Anything, El."

"Take off your clothes," Elliot challenged her.

"Excuse me," Olivia asked unclear that she heard what he said correctly, she couldn't have.

"You heard me the first time," Elliot stepped closer caging her body in. "Take off your clothes and let me fuck you bareback."

There is a thunder in our hearts baby. So much hate for the ones we love.

Olivia's hand immediately made contact with Elliot's face.

Elliot laughed rubbing his cheek. "I thought you said anything?"

"Fuck you, Elliot." Olivia glared at him.

"That's what you want, what you have always wanted isn't it?" Elliot stepped closer grabbing her tightly by both wrists and hauling her to him. "Tell me when my ex-wife sent you over here that the thought never crossed your mind."

Olivia pulled against his hold. "Let me go, Elliot. I should have never come over here."

"Yeah but you did," Elliot reminded her. "Come on, Olivia why don't we be honest?"

Olivia glared at him trying to break his grip.

"Tell me you don't want me, don't want this," Elliot said backing them up to the couch. He smiled down at her.

"I am only telling you one thing, Elliot. You need to let me go, now." Olivia struggled against his grip but was surprised suddenly when he dropped one of her wrists placing his hand at the back of her head and before she could react his mouth was hot and open on top of hers obliterating any thoughts rational or otherwise.

Tell me we both matter don't we? Come on baby, come on darling let me steal this moment from you.